The Darcy Brothers

by Abigail Reynolds

  “You must admit that, though Mrs. Wickham is a bit empty headed, she is quite a treat for the eyes,” Monty responded, waggling his brows.

  “Good Lord! You noticed something like that?”

  “You know me. I never could turn away from a pretty face with a sweet little pout or a tempting…”

  “Stop! Please stop! I will never be able to look that poor girl in the eye again. Maybe you should have married her instead of Wickham.”

  Monty snorted and plunged on. “So do tell. What about the other two sisters?”

  “I have not met them all, but my brother tells me Mary is very serious and reads sermons all the time. Kitty is apparently attractive enough but not much better behaved than Lydia,” Theo responded.

  They sipped their brandy in silence for a few minutes listening to the reassuring, familiar sounds around them in the room. The clink of glasses, an occasional outburst of laughter, the crackle of the fire, and the snap of cards being dealt in the next room.

  “So now your brother is getting leg-shackled, you cannot be far behind.”

  “Me? Marry? My dear man, you are out of your mind! You are the one who must marry to carry on your family title, but fortunately, I am under no such obligation. I do not believe I shall ever marry.” Theo took another sip of the warm amber liquid.

  “So you say now!” Monty told him. “Mark my words. Some young lady will turn your head and all your protests will be forgotten.”

  “I am looking forward to our evening at Vauxhall,” Theo said. “Who will be in attendance?”

  “Very well, we shall change the subject, as I can see any talk of marriage makes you uncomfortable.”

  Normally Theo loved it when Monty laughed. It was a deep, rolling sound that seemed to set the entire room to vibrating. Tonight, he was finding his friend very irritating. “So what about Vauxhall?”

  Monty finally stopped laughing and rattled off the list of the invited guests.

  “That sounds like a very agreeable group. I am looking forward to it.”

  “Theo, I warn you! Whatever you do, do not invite your cousin, Miss de Bourgh.”

  Theo looked at his friend solemnly. “I would not think of it! Even though I love my cousin, I know she has much to learn before she is ready to attend an event like this. Honestly, I will be relieved to have some time away from her. She was about ready to invite herself to our family dinner the other night, but we were able to head her off. In the end, she only returned to Darcy House this morning.”

  Monty lifted his glass to Theo. “Here is to getting away from annoying cousins!”

  Theo sat up and leaned close enough for them to touch glasses. “Here is to an entertaining evening.”

  *****

  The day they were to go to Vauxhall the weather held, which meant Theo and Monty could make use of the curricle. The whole party had agreed to set out from Darcy House together, with Mrs. and Mr. Gardiner chaperoning the young ladies in separate carriages. As it turned out, the young gentlemen were the first to arrive. Theo left his friend to lord it over everyone from the high perch of his curricle and, taking the steps two at a time, ascended to the front door and beat a rhythm on it with the knocker. The door opened almost at once.

  Georgiana threw her arms around him.

  “You look very pretty,” he said, and she did, with her hair done up into ringlets under a pretty blue bonnet that matched her eyes.

  Then, Anne appeared at top of the stairway, clearly dressed for an evening out.

  “Do not tell me Anne is coming with us?” he said in a fierce whisper to Georgiana. “She was not even invited.”

  “I heard that,” said Anne, sternly. “Georgiana has already raised some objections, but I assured her there would not be a problem. I have met Sir Montgomery and we took to each other exceedingly well. I am sure he will be delighted to find I am joining the party. In fact, I rather think it will be a pleasant surprise.”

  Sometimes, thought Theo, Monty was too polite for his own good. He had clearly left Anne with the wrong impression. Theo could not correct this, of course, but he was obliged to do what he could to dissuade Anne from coming.

  “I would advise against it, Anne,” he said as firmly as he could. “You cannot invite yourself. It is simply not done. Besides, Sir Montgomery has only bespoke nine places for tonight. It will be quite impossible to request an extra setting at the last minute.”

  Anne waved his objections away.

  “Pooh! As to that, I am certain we can grease someone’s palm for an extra setting, Theo. I am as rich as Croesus. Now that we have sorted out the terms of Papa’s Will—thanks to you—I find I am very well endowed.”

  Theo sputtered. Georgiana turned pink.

  “Perhaps well-endowed is not quite the right word, Cousin?” ventured Theo. “It has certain—connotations.

  He refrained from mentioning that greasing someone’s palm was not a phrase delicate females were accustomed to using, either.

  “Nonsense,” said Anne. “You comprehended my meaning, did you not, Georgiana?”

  “Yes— however, I do believe Theo is right,” said Georgiana, rather timidly.

  Anne turned an unsmiling gaze on Georgiana and looked about to object, but apparently relented. “Very well, I will avoid the phrase.”

  “Shall we wait in the drawing room?” said Theo, “that way we can spot the others when they arrive.”

  They did not have to wait long. Theo had no sooner taken up a place near the window when two carriages drew up to Darcy House—the Gardiners’ landau and Darcy’s barouche.

  “Ah,” said Theo, relieved, looking out of the window. “Here comes Darcy with the rest.”

  Theo felt like a traitor as he accompanied his sister and cousin to where Monty stood waiting next to his curricle. The polite expression on Monty’s face turned to an accusation as he spotted Anne. He controlled it, however, as he greeted Anne and Georgiana, bowing and greeting them with perfect civility.

  “Is that your curricle, Sir Montgomery? It is quite dashing. I shall go in the curricle,” announced Anne.

  Theo only just managed to conceal his dismay. It was bad enough imposing Anne on his friend, but to oblige him to have her next to him all the way would be certain to try the patience of a saint, and Monty was no saint.

  “I will need all my wits about me to negotiate the crush outside Vauxhall Gardens,” said Monty, “so I would prefer not to have the distraction of a young lady next to me. However,” he added, seeing a stubborn look settle on her face, “I would be delighted to drive you in Hyde Park one day next week.”

  “Very well,” conceded Anne. “I will hold you to your promise.”

  “I thought I told you not to invite her,” he growled once everyone was settled in the other two carriages and Theo swung up to the seat beside him.

  “I could as soon stop her as prevent a thunderstorm from happening.”

  A glum mood seemed to have settled over Monty as he drove off in silence, saying no more. Theo felt a qualm of conscience. He should have made more of an effort to stop Anne from coming, but he had not really insisted because part of him felt sorry for her. He would never forget the transformation that had occurred at Rosings as Anne had slowly emerged from the medicine-induced haze she had suffered all those years. He did not have the heart to deprive her of the pleasure of tonight’s outing.

  However, that did not mean he had to saddle his friend with her.

  “I am sorry, Monty,” said Theo, contritely. “I should have tried harder to stop her. I did not mean to destroy your night’s pleasure.”

  “Pray continue to grovel, Theo,” said Monty, his lips curling as he drove the curricle skillfully through a narrow space between two fruit carts. “It does not undo the damage, but I am deriving some amusement from it.”

  Theo’s contrition evaporated instantly. “If you are looking for amusement, then do not expect me to provide it. You must wait until we are at Vauxhall. Though I still do not understand what
possessed you to invite my family.”

  “It was a fit of generosity that I am rapidly coming to regret.”

  “I am perfectly serious, Monty.”

  “I was hoping to spend the evening flirting agreeably with your sister.”

  “You know very well, Monty, that my sister is off-bounds.”

  “There is no harm in a little light flirtation, is there? Do not tell me you have taken on your brother’s role now and are turning into a Prince Theophilus? I never thought I would see the day.”

  “You are not going to provoke me, Monty, so do not even try. I am determined to let nothing mar the pleasure of this evening, particularly since you are to foot the bill.”

  *****

  “I cannot believe we are truly at Vauxhall,” said Georgiana. “I have heard so much said about it that it is like a dream come true.”

  “I hope you find it lives up to its reputation,” said Monty, smiling at Georgiana’s palpable excitement as they paid their three-and-sixpence to enter.

  “I am sure it will,” she said. “It is so kind of Fitzwilliam to allow me to attend, even though I am not yet officially out.”

  “It is very generous indeed of your guardian,” said Mrs. Gardiner, giving Darcy a warm smile even though he was standing too far away to hear their conversation. It was obvious that Darcy had rapidly become a favorite of hers.

  Oh, so now it is Darcy who is receiving the credit for this, then? Considering how long it had taken Theo to convince Darcy that it would be unfair to exclude Georgiana from the invitation, he thought she could at least have thanked him too.

  Still, seeing her enjoyment was reward enough.

  They were greeted by a troop of acrobats performing circus acts and juggling. Anne watched for a few minutes, then stopped the jugglers and requested them to teach her how to juggle. Amiably surprised, they were happy to oblige. Not for long, however. It soon became clear that she would not be leaving until she became a competent juggler, whereupon they became far less inclined to be complimentary and more inclined to grumble. Theo was obliged to slip them a coin to appease then. However, nothing the other members of the group said could drag Anne away until Monty, employing his legendary powers of persuasion, described far more appealing sights they were yet to encounter, and managed to intrigue Anne enough to forget the jugglers.

  It was a warm dry evening and the Gardens were crowded. Darcy, who was uncomfortable with the good natured jostling and press of people, was anxious to reach the relative privacy of the supper boxes, but there was no making fast progress, even if Anne were not with them, hindering their progress. Theo was stopped and greeted by several barrister friends and by a client he had defended. Monty seemed to know a prodigious number of handsome ladies who all wanted to talk to him on one pretext or the other. Darcy’s expression, meanwhile, was growing increasingly constricted.

  Sensing Darcy’s discomfort, Monty offered to take Darcy, Elizabeth, Bingley and Jane through a shortcut behind the buildings straight to the pavilion, allowing the rest of the party to proceed at a more leisurely pace.

  “I am not certain that it is quite proper to split the party,” said Mrs. Gardiner. “After all, Mr. Gardiner and I are here to serve as chaperones.”

  “Let them go, my dear,” said Mr. Gardiner. “There is no cause for alarm. Your nieces are with their fiancés, after all. And with so many people always promenading to and fro in front of the boxes, there can be no suggestion of impropriety. You will have your chance to put your eagle eye to good use later, when we are strolling amongst the trees. Besides, I cannot imagine Mr. Darcy conducting himself in anything but the most exemplary manner. I am sure Sir Monty will be happy to replace us as chaperone, will you not?”

  Theo had to refrain from laughing at the idea of Sir Monty playing nursemaid to Darcy.

  “Shall I don a matron’s cap?” said Monty. “I wonder if it would suit me?”

  “You, sir, would look far better in a bonnet, with a large peacock feather as trimming,” said Elizabeth, laughing.

  “You flatter me, Miss Elizabeth,” he said, with a grin, “but I do agree that it would complement my green eyes.”

  Darcy was looking restless. Theo wondered how it was that his brother was so different from him. Theo thrived in the midst of crowds or in the center of the public eye, while Darcy avoided them whenever he could.

  “Enough nonsense, Monty,” said Theo. “Just go. My brother is impatient to be seated.”

  Mrs. Gardiner watched them uneasily as they walked away. “Oh, dear, perhaps I should go with them.”

  “I wish you to stay with me, Mrs. Gardiner,” said her husband, drawing her arm through his and patting it. “We will take our time exploring the place. We do not come here every day, after all—it has been a long time since our last visit.”

  When they arrived some time later at the dinner box, however, Mrs. Gardiner’s fears were confirmed. They found the two couples seated alone in the box, while Monty was leaning negligently against the entrance of another box some way down, engaged in conversation with a handsome lady in tall ostrich feathers.

  He took his leave from the young lady as soon as he saw the group and came over.

  “I hope you have enjoyed the garden so far, Miss de Bourgh, Miss Darcy?”

  “Oh, yes,” explained Georgiana. “The vaulted colonnade seemed to go on forever, and I loved the flowers and lanterns hanging from the trees. I cannot wait for dark to fall so we can see the lights.”

  “I was splashed by one of the fountains,” said Anne. “It took me by surprise.”

  “Mrs. Gardiner, how about you? Did you enjoy the sights?” said Monty, smiling engagingly at her.

  “I did,” replied Mrs. Gardiner. “However, you will not charm me into forgetting that you abandoned your post.”

  “Have I let you down?” said Monty, “I beg your pardon most humbly. Tell me what I must do to earn your forgiveness, and I will perform it devotedly, madam.”

  At his hang-dog expression Mrs. Gardiner could not help laughing. “It would be ungrateful of me to be unfriendly to my host,” said Mrs. Gardiner. “So I suppose you must be forgiven.”

  “You are a cunning young puppy,” remarked Mr. Gardiner. “You must give me lessons on how to avoid being in Mrs. Gardiner’s bad books.”

  At that point, the arrack punch arrived and the group took their seats in the box. As soon as it had been served, Elizabeth tapped on the edge of her glass with a fork.

  She waited until she had everyone’s attention.

  “I know this is unconventional for a lady, but since we are mostly family here, I will not hold back. I would like to propose a toast. If everybody could stand up, please,” said Elizabeth. She raised her glass. “To my brother Theophilus Darcy, the hero of the day! We owe you an enormous debt of gratitude.”

  “Hear, hear!” came the responses.

  “To Theophilus Darcy!”

  Theo looked over to where Darcy was sitting, wondering how that had gone down with him. He sincerely hoped there would be no jealous misunderstanding of Elizabeth’s gesture. He knew Darcy had been convinced for a long time that Elizabeth harbored some feelings for Theo.

  There was no danger of that. Darcy was smiling, a besotted look on his face. No one who saw him now would think he had for a long time held the title of Prince William. She is very good for him, Theo thought. Darcy’s gaze shifted and met his. Then Darcy did something unprecedented. He winked.

  Theo almost dropped his glass in astonishment. He did not remember the last time he had seen his brother make such a gesture. Monty winked often enough, but Darcy?

  “And to Sir Montgomery Preston,” added Elizabeth, “Who, as I understand it, put his boxing skills to good use by apprehending Wickham when he tried to get away.”

  General laughter followed.

  “To Sir Monty,” said Anne, loudly, after the others had already sat down and put down their glasses. She gulped down a mouthful and promptly choked on it.


  There was some good-natured laughter at her reaction, then the waiters arrived with the food and everyone’s attention was distracted as Georgiana exclaimed at the famed wafer-thin ham and wondered how they were able to cut it that way.

  Monty, who was next to Anne, was forced to minister to her by walloping her on the back.

  “This drink is remarkable,” she said, her eyes taking on a marked shine. “I like it. Far better than the swill mother used to douse me with.”

  “It is not exactly medicinal,” said Monty. “The arrack punch here has a reputation for potency. It is made from the best ingredients.”

  Anne turned to give Monty her full attention. “You know,” said Anne, staring at Monty’s cravat. “I do wish you would let me tie that cravat for you. There is something not quite right about it.”

  She reached for the cravat. Theo observed his friend’s discomfort in amusement and waited to see what would happen. Monty was rarely at a loss for words when it came to the ladies, but he was clearly thrown off guard by Anne.

  “My dear Miss de Bourgh,” said Monty, in a drawl. “I am quite accustomed to having ladies take off my cravat, but not generally in public. If you insist on doing so, may I suggest we go somewhere else?”

  Anne blinked, thinking this over. It was impossible to know what was going on in his cousin’s mind. Did she understand Monty’s insinuation?

  “I knew it,” she said with a satisfied nod. “I am not the only lady who objects to your knot. Never underestimate what a lady has to say when it comes to fashion. I believe the fair sex has a decided advantage over men when it comes to these matters.”

  Monty, who was unwisely taking a sip of his arrack, promptly choked on it. It was now Anne’s turn to thump him on the back, which she did rather more vigorously than was necessary.

  “I see that you, too, find the arrack punch much stronger than expected.” She gave him a kindly smile. “I have discovered that sipping it more slowly makes it much more agreeable. I would advise you to do the same.”