The Soul That Redeems Me (The Forever Mine Series Book 3)

by H. J. Marshall

  “How do you feel like a hike?” he asked, his smile lighting up the room.

  “I would love a hike today but it’s raining outside. We’ll get soaked.”

  “That’s the plan.” His eyebrows wiggling as we stood up and made our way into our individual bedrooms.

  Just because we were sharing a bed didn’t mean that we undressed in front of each other. Besides some over the clothes rubbing and grinding, Josh had yet to see me naked and I had only caught glimpses of him shirtless around the apartment when he would go from the shower to his bedroom.

  Josh and I were two broken individuals that had miraculously found each other in the chaos of the world. Two broken pieces whose jagged edges matched up. Two damaged people who together, make one complete soul. I was leaving class after my final that week when I stopped by the registrar’s office to withdraw for next semester.

  I hadn’t spoken with Andrew about it but I knew that it was the right decision for me. I needed some time to gather my thoughts and decide what I wanted to do with my life. Josh had a trip to Chicago next week for a few days and he had invited me to join him, reassuring me that Jason was okay with me traveling with him.

  We were going to take Jake to his parents while we were out of town, and I was going to miss my cuddle buddy while we were gone. I was walking in the direction of the train station when I heard someone yell my name. I spun around to see Jazz, Josh’s friend walking toward me in all her eclectic glory. I envied her and her ability to make anything she wears look badass.

  Today, her hair is a crazy orange and her tattoos are on full display, regardless of the cool weather we are experiencing.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked her, curious as to why she was on campus.

  “I’m picking up a freshman orientation package for my younger sister Heidi. My parents are trying to convince her she doesn’t need college and I’m telling her she needs the degree to have success in life so I’m grabbing one in hopes to persuade her.” A smirk on her lips.

  Jazz would win this battle. She usually did where Heidi and her parents were concerned. Their Mom and Dad are hippies and while they are fun to be around, they gave the girls little to no structure growing up, resulting in Jazz being more of a mother to Heidi than a sister.

  “Sounds like Heidi is going to college.” I laughed as she joined in.

  “I’m headed back to my shop. Can I give you a ride?” she inquired when she saw the direction I was walking.

  “That would be great. I really hate the train sometimes.” I responded as I followed her to the car and we headed into traffic.

  We laughed and caught up on the ride, her making jokes about me and Josh. I was beginning to think Jazz may have a soft spot for Josh and I worry she may not approve of us dating.

  “Can I ask you something?”

  “Sure.” She replied.

  “Do you have a problem with Josh and I dating or living together?”

  “Absolutely not. I think you two make a great couple. I joke with all my friends and I was hoping you considered me a friend. I see how much Josh cares for you and all I want for him is to be happy. You keep him happy; you keep me happy.”

  I guess that’s as close to a threat against hurting Josh as I will ever get and I take her meaning to heart.

  “I could never hurt him. I love him too much to cause him pain.”

  “I know. He told me how much he loves you and in all the years I’ve known him, I have never seen him the way he is with you. You really are his One, aren’t you?”

  I nodded my head with a huge smile on my face, “Yes.” Gleeful in the knowledge that everyone knows we belong together.

  We sing along and visit until we pull up to the apartment building and I go to open the door. She gently grabbed my arm, halting my exit.

  “I want you to know you can call me if you ever need to talk. I’ve known them all since college and I’m happy to see them all starting their lives. I know you and Josh are still new but I really do see you guys lasting forever.” She pulls me in for a hug and released me just as quick.

  “Thank you, Jazz.” I respond before closing the door and watching her pull away from the curb.

  I made my way up the apartment and got Jake to take him for a walk. We both needed the exercise so I took the long way around, hoping to burn off some of his excessive energy. He’d been cooped up for the last few days while Josh worked late on the expansion and I was stuck in my books. Even if I knew I wasn’t going back next semester, I still put in the hard work to pass my current classes. I refused to waste the tuition on failure.

  I was a block or so from the building when a sensation of being watched spooked me. I jogged the distance back, made sure the door closed behind me as I walked across the lobby, and pushed the button for the elevator. I laughed my feelings off as exhaustion from studying so hard the last few days.

  Making my way back into my apartment, I locked the doors behind me and put Jake’s leash up on the hook. I heard a beep on my phone and saw a message from Josh.

  J: I have to work late on new contract provisions for Chicago. It may be after eight o’clock before I make it home so eat dinner without me and I’ll grab something here. I love you!

  E: Just got back from walking Jake and was thinking of a salad for dinner.

  J: I wish you would eat more but at least you are getting your vitamins. Don’t worry about taking Jake out tonight. I’ll do it when I get home.

  Normally I would have argued with him but after the feeling I had earlier, I was in no mood to be combative.

  E: Okay. He should be good until you get home in a few hours. I love you too.

  J: I’ll work quickly. I want to get home to my family. <3

  My heart fluttered at the word family. Josh had not treated me any differently after he’d heard what I’d had to do. I’d been terrified he would hate me, but I think he loves me more for being honest with him. I hated to have to tell him about the attack but he needed to understand the whole story before I explained my actions.

  After eating dinner and feeding Jake, I showered off the day and settled into the couch with a blanket and the new Vanessa Fewings book I had been excited to start. I must have been more tired than I thought because once Jake cuddled up next to me, I felt my eyelids getting heavy.

  I was startled awake by the pounding at the front door. My grogginess caused me to be confused and I felt lost for a moment. The pounding got louder than the slurred voice came through the door.

  “Open up, you stupid bitch! I know you’re in there. Let me in.” Bam. Bam. Bam.

  The noise had Jake growling toward the door, his body positioned between me and it. I suddenly remembered the security app that Jason had installed on my phone. I pulled it up, all the while his foul words kept echoing through the door at me, causing my hands to shake.

  Bam! “Open up, damn it.” Bam!” You owe me you little slut” Bam! “I’m here to collect!” he snarled through the door as the booming grew louder.

  I viewed the camera positioned outside my door and the man standing there had a look of murder in his eyes. He kept kicking and hammering his huge, meaty fists against the door. Jake started barking as the sounds grew louder and louder. Not knowing what else to do, I ran into my bedroom and slid my clothes to the side, my fingers fumbled to put the code into the lock hidden in the crease of the wall.

  I finally got the correct combination of numbers and the door swung open. I grabbed a still barking and growling Jake and pulled him into the small space, securing the door behind me. The room was soundproofed so the shouting and banging immediately stopped. I kept stroking Jake’s fur in an attempt to calm him, when in reality, he was pushing his head under my hand, trying to keep me calm.

  I allowed my breathing to slow as I dialed Josh’s number and I prayed he would pick up. Sometimes when he worked late, he moved from office to office and forgot his phone on his desk. He answered on the second ring and a fresh round of tears started falling at t
he sound of his voice.

  “Emily, is everything okay?” He asked me. His ability to know when I was freaking out was welcome at the moment.

  “J-J-Josh, can you come home? There’s someone trying to get into the apartment and Jake and I locked ourselves into the panic room.”

  “Are you okay? I’m leaving now but it will take me a bit to get to you. I’m at the North office finishing up.”

  “I don’t know who it is but he started beating on the door and yelling the worst things. I looked at the security camera and I don’t know who he is. He looked crazy Josh and Jake wouldn’t stop barking. I felt this was the safest place in the apartment and we hid.” I admitted, feeling a little silly for locking myself behind what was basically a vault door, knowing that my training couldn’t protect us from a man his size, displaying the amount of anger he was.

  “I need you to call Caroline and have her monitor the camera while I’m on the phone with you. I want you to talk to me until I get there. Can you do that, baby?”

  “Yes, let me add her to our call. Hold on while I put you on speaker.” After hitting a few buttons, the sound of a ringing phone is heard through our connection.

  “Emily! What’s shakin’ bacon?” Caroline cheerfully answered the phone.

  “Caroline, it’s Josh. I need for you to pull up the security camera on the apartment and monitor it while I talk to Emily as I drive home. Someone is yelling and banging on the apartment door and she and Jake have secured themselves into the panic room. I need to know what I’m walking into when I get there, and I need for you to call the police also. Can you do that… and not allow Andrew to lose it?”

  “I’m on it. I’ll call the police and let building security know as well. I’ve got the app up and it looks like he is still there only it looks like he is sleeping just outside the elevator. He’s not moving except his breathing so I think he may be passed out. I’ll keep an eye on things but you need to call us as soon as you get home… I can only keep Andrew from coming to her for so long, Josh. Hurry.”

  The phone disconnected, and I let out the breath I was holding. “I wish I had thought to keep the app open but my only fear was him getting inside the apartment, so I high-tailed it to the panic room. I feel so stupid. I’m sorry for causing all this worry, Josh.”

  “Stop! Some asshole was trying to get into the apartment and if Jake was barking, you had reason to be cautious. I’m not too far from you, sweetheart. I’ll be there soon. Just stay on the phone with me. You are safe, baby. I promise.”

  We kept small conversation until I heard the keypad beep, him telling me he was unlocking it from his side to ensure I knew I was safe. When I saw his face, I launched myself into his arms and Jake jumped up, needing to be a part of the hug. Josh set me down and we made our way into the living room to speak with the police who were arresting the drunk man who was still asleep outside the elevator.

  The police determined the man was an ex-boyfriend of a tenant on the fifth floor. He was extremely drunk and combative and he had made a mistake with the floors, resulting in him trying to break my door down. They arrested him for public drunkenness, trespassing on private property and hauled him away.

  Just as they removed him, I heard the elevator ding and when it opened, Andrew, Lucas, and Jason all made their way toward us. I found myself running to Andrew and wrapping my arms around him as we walked back to the apartment and Jason went to talk to the detectives. We sat down on the couch as Josh pulled me into his side and Andrew kept a hold of my hand.

  Lucas observed the whole situation and other than a quick hug, he had yet to say anything. The look on his face was one of anger and I was worried it was reflected at me. I felt the need to apologize again to everyone as the police left and Jason joined us in the living room.

  “I’m sorry.” I blurted out at the group of men, my protectors.

  “You have nothing to be sorry for, Emily. You did exactly what you were supposed to do. You made sure you were somewhere safe and called for help. That’s what the system was designed for and I’m glad that you are okay.” Jason explained to me.

  I swung my eyes to Andrew and he smiled at me, letting me know it was okay.

  “I never want to be a burden to any of you but he was so loud and when Jake started barking, it scared me.”

  “Do you want to come and stay with us for a few days?” Andrew asked me, causing Josh to tighten his hold on me.

  “I’m safe here with Josh, Andrew. Jason’s right, the system did what it was supposed to do and the guy was a drunk who got off on the wrong floor. I promise, I’m okay but I don’t want to leave. I don’t want to give my fears too much power over me. Tonight was just a huge misunderstanding. Really. I’m safer here behind all these doors and locks than I will be alone in your house out in the suburbs.”

  “She’s staying here. If she feels unsafe, I will drive her to you personally, but for now, let’s let her decide what is best for her,” Josh explained to a moody Andrew.

  I was pulled into a hug by my brother, my nerves finally settling as I looked up and saw I was surrounded by men who had dropped everything they were doing to make sure I was safe.

  “I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you again,” Andrew whispered into my ear before he released the hug and settled back into the couch, unshed tears in his eyes.

  “Is tomorrow your last final, Emily?” Lucas asked me.

  “Yes, and since almost everyone is here, I guess I have an announcement. I withdrew from my classes for next semester today. I decided that law school wasn’t for me and Dr. Sawyer and I discussed taking some time off to figure out what I want to do for a career. I have time to decide and with the move and all the changes, I was afraid to tell you the truth, Andrew. I don’t want to be a lawyer. I went because I had promised Mom and Dad after they died that I would fight for justice. I saw after the trial that justice is blind to the victims and money will buy your way out of jail. I can’t be a part of a system that penalizes victims and rewards perpetrators.”

  The stunned silence in the room made me think I had made a mistake until Jason smiled at me and said, “I think that is a great idea, Emily. College isn’t for everyone and if you already hate your major, you will be miserable in your career. Why don’t you think about working for me for a few months? Josh and I discussed you traveling with him for the contract stuff but I would love for you to be a part of the MSJ family until you decide what career path you want.”

  “Thank you for the offer, Jason. Can I think about it for a few days?”

  “The offer stands and the job is yours.” He replied as he and Lucas stood up and headed toward the front door. “We are going to give you three some time alone. Andrew, we will be in the car when you are ready.”

  A few handshakes and hugs later, Andrew, Josh and I were alone in the apartment and I felt the tension rolling off my brother.

  “Is this really what you want, Emily?” Andrew asked.

  “It really is. I don’t want to hate my job and right now, I just want to experience life and all that it has to offer. I need a break, Andrew. After we moved, I threw myself into my studies, trying to hide from the truth. I’m doing better and I have reduced my therapy to once a week. I promise this is a good thing!” I smiled at him while curled into Josh’s side.

  “Then I support your decision. Your sisters are going to try and get you back to school but I agree with you. You deserve a break and if traveling with Josh makes you happy, then I’m all for it.” He explained as he stood up and pulled me into a huge hug before releasing me and shaking Josh’s hand. “Take care of her, Josh.”

  “It’s my sole focus in life, Andrew.” He replied as my brother walked to the door and opened it to the silent hallway.

  Emily fell into my arms the minute the door shut behind Andrew. I swooped her up and carried her, bridal-style, to the couch and sat down with her in my lap, my arms surrounding her small body as I felt the small tremors reverberating deep wit
hin her. Outwardly, she appeared fine. Upset, but fine.

  “Let it out, baby. It’s just us now. It’s okay, I’ve got you. Nothing can hurt you,” I whispered into her hair as I felt her body begin to shudder with her silent sobbing.

  I gently stroked her back as she began to calm down and settle deeper into my lap. Since I had opened the panic door, Jake had stayed glued to her side, and right now she was petting his head in her lap, her body no longer shaking. We sat there for what felt like an hour before she spoke.

  “I feel so weak sometimes. I try to be strong, to tell people I’m okay, in reality, I’m a mess. I trained to fight as soon as I finished rehab. Andrew and I would spend hours at the gym, rebuilding my wasted muscle tone in my arm and leg.

  “We would spar, and repeat motions over and over until they became fixed in my memory. I started to feel a little more like myself and…started to believe I was stronger than the demons who chased me every day.

  “I was sure that if ever faced with a situation where someone was trying to hurt me…I would be able to defend myself. I would be able to fight better…smarter. Right this minute… I feel stupid.

  All I want to do is… sit here and cry… and …and feel sorry for myself, and I hate that I think this way!

  “Nothing happened to me tonight besides getting a creepy feeling someone was watching me when I walked Jake earlier… and then some drunk asshole who got the wrong apartment and kicked and yelled for a little bit. Yet, here I sit… crying and being a burden to you… and my family. I’m sorry, Josh.”

  I was dumbfounded at her declaration. How could she think she was a burden? That she was stupid? That she did something wrong?

  I immediately wanted to reply to her critical analysis of the evening but I was too busy thinking about what she had said right at the end.

  “Emily, look at me baby.” I wanted to be sure I heard her correctly. Her glistening eyes looked up at me so I continued, “I’ll get back to all the other things you said in just a second, but did you say you felt like you were being watched before the drunk started banging on the door?”