Void

by D Haltinner

  “Yep.”

  “Where do we start?”

  Audrey let out a light laugh and shook her head to move a clump of stray hairs from the corner of her eye. “At the beginning.”

  “I was thinking more like in the biography section.”

  “Let’s go.”

  Audrey rose, swinging her butt cheeks only inches from Darren’s face as he started to rise behind her. She waited for him, hand stretched out. Darren took her hand and walked with her hand-in-hand into the aisles of book shelves.

  She walked with a giddiness that Darren hadn’t seen outside of a seven year old, her face in its usual perma-smile and her long legs almost hopping across the carpet toward the same section of the library that housed the hatch.

  It felt so natural to have Audrey’s hand in his own, and he didn’t want to let it go. She was so warm, her skin so soft. He wished he could just wrap himself up in her.

  His face reddened at the thought, and he tried to change his train of thought and put the hatch into his mind since they were heading toward it. Part of him wanted to open it back up and see what was down there that the school didn’t want to be found, but the rest of him said that it wasn’t worth the risk of getting caught. He didn’t want what happened to Troy to happen to him, no matter how curious he was.

  Audrey led him down to the aisle where the biographies were housed, then down to the shelf where the Paul Revere books were. The bookcase on the immediate right was the one covering the hatch, beckoning to Darren to be moved out of the way.

  “Here we go,” Audrey said. She raised a finger to the dip below her lips and scanned through the bindings with her eyes, her hand still holding on to Darren’s.

  Darren’s eyes continued to drift to the base of the bookshelf beside them, but he caught himself each time and snapped them back to the books ahead of them.

  “Are there more over there?” Audrey asked, looking at the other bookcase.

  “No,” Darren said.

  “Something else interesting?”

  “Not really.”

  Audrey picked out a few books and Darren volunteered to carry them back to the table. They did some quick perusing of the volumes and chose two books to check out for individual tasks. They discussed how they wanted to format the paper, what important items they wanted to cover, and by the time Audrey happened to glance at the clock, it was nearing ten o’clock,

  “Wow, it got late fast,” she said.

  Darren hadn’t even thought about the time, Just being with Audrey made him forget all about it. “I never noticed.”

  “We should probably call it a night,” Audrey said as she started to pack up the outline she was creating.

  “I guess.”

  “When would you like to get together again?”

  “I'm open just about every day.”

  Audrey dropped her stuff into her backpack and twisted her body to look at Darren, her long eyelashes teasing him. “Why don’t we have lunch together again,” she said. “I kind of enjoyed that today.”

  “I did too,” Darren said as heat swarmed across his face.

  Audrey’s smile grew and she let out a light laugh. “It’s a date then.”

  Darren’s face burned.

  Audrey turned back to her backpack and Darren tried to clear his thoughts. He didn’t want to part from her tonight, but at least he had lunch to look forward to now.

  By the time Audrey zipped up her backpack and turned to Darren, his face was cooling back down to normal and he already had his backpack.

  “Which dorm do you live in?” Audrey asked.

  “Northwest,” Darren said.

  “I’m in the southwest,” Audrey said. “Why don’t you walk me to my door? I am on your way.” She stood and slipped her jacket on over her bare shoulders.

  “I’d love to.”

  Audrey’s smile grew and she lifted her backpack over her arms, picking up the book she was going to check out. “Such a gentleman.”

  “I try,” Darren said, standing up and grabbing his own backpack and book.

  Darren followed Audrey to the front desk, they checked out the books, and then stepped outside into the night. Audrey let Darren tuck her book into her backpack, holding her dark hair out of the way for him.

  Audrey thanked him, and looped her arm into his, guiding him down the path that ran past the dining hall and to the four dorms.

  The night was calm, the sky pitch black beyond the street lamps glowing a dozen feet above their heads. No stars could be seen above the city, but that didn’t stop Audrey from letting her eyes bat across the heavens like rose petals floating down a subtle creek.

  “It’s a beautiful night,” Audrey said.

  Darren wanted to tell her that it wasn’t as beautiful as her, but he restrained himself. He couldn’t start making those kinds of compliments while he still had a girlfriend. “It is,” he said instead.

  Audrey pulled herself against Darren tighter, strengthening her grip on his arm. “Sometimes I wish I went into astronomy.”

  “Wouldn’t that take away some of the beauty though? Trying to classify the stars and galaxies you saw at night?”

  “I never thought about that.” She rested the side of her head on Darren’s shoulder. “I suppose you are probably right though.”

  An older man walked past them, his hands deep in his pockets, his face staring down at the walkway before him. No one was out in the vicinity of Darren and Audrey, leaving a sense of privacy that was beginning to make Darren nervous.

  The pair passed by the dining hall, Audrey leaning against Darren as if he was the most comfortable pillow in the world. Darren had never felt so relaxed by another person’s touch before, and he was starting to wonder if there really was something growing between them already.

  That wouldn’t be fair to Rachel though. Darren couldn’t get involved with another girl, he couldn’t be that close to Audrey. Sure, he and Rachel were in the midst of a rough patch, but he wasn't an adulterer, and he couldn’t dump the girl he has loved for the last three years for one he just met. It wasn’t like him.

  But something was happening. Something that was out of his conscious control.

  The southwest dorm materialized in front of them, the light of the rooms lighting the area up in a dim shadow less glow. When they got close to the door, Audrey lifted her head off of Darren’s shoulder and stepped in front of him as she slid her hand down his arm and laced her fingers into his hands.

  The light of the streetlamps glistened in her eyes as they looked up at him with a need and longing that Darren had never seen before. A stray hair had gotten caught in her eyebrow, and Darren reached for it, sliding it out of her face.

  “Thank you for walking me back,” Audrey said.

  “My pleasure.”

  Audrey looked into Darren’s eyes, her own beckoning to him. She seemed to be expecting something from him, and he knew exactly what it was.

  She wanted him to kiss her.

  But Darren couldn’t do that. He had a girlfriend, and there was no way he could be kissing another girl. He shouldn’t be having to remind himself about Rachel’s existence-he shouldn’t even be thinking about Audrey like this. He was an honorable man, and honorable men are faithful to the ones they love.

  Audrey pulled herself closer to Darren. Her chest heaved only inches from his. A tingling sensation passed through Darren’s body and his heart’s pace skyrocketed.

  No matter how much he wanted to, he couldn’t kiss her. He just couldn’t.

  He knew it would be the best kiss he ever had in his life though. He wanted to kiss Audrey more that he had ever wanted anything in his life, but he couldn’t. It wasn’t right.

  Audrey slipped her arms around Darren’s neck, locking them together behind him.

  Darren wanted to stop her, but he couldn’t, his body wasn’t doing what his mind told it to do. Sweat was pouring down his armpits and the sides of his body. His breathing grew faster and deeper as he stared into
the gentleness of her eyes.

  Audrey reached up towards him, closing her eyes.

  Darren couldn’t stop himself. His entire body was at the point of trembling from the lethal combination of adrenalin and testosterone swarming through him. His mind was screaming at him to stop this before it happened, but he couldn’t do anything to control himself.

  Audrey’s face inched forward, and Darren’s lowered down to hers by its own volition. His eyes closed as her image lost focus, and her lips puckered.

  Their lips met.

  An explosion went off inside Darren. His thoughts vanished in a burst of emotion that swarmed through him. He lost notice of his hands, only to find them exploring Audrey’s back beneath her backpack a moment later as his heart increased to a near sonic speed.

  Never had he thought this kind of magic even existed. It was like no kiss he ever had with Rachel, and he didn’t want it to end. He'd do anything to feel this way for the rest of his life.

  Then he thought about Rachel.

  He was kissing another girl while his girlfriend was only a building away. He was cheating on her. Yeah, he wasn't having sex with Audrey, but it was still cheating. Plain and simple.

  Audrey pulled herself against Darren as their lips danced. Her firm breasts pushed against him, her hips meeting his own.

  How could he never have known something so great existed? This woman was some sort of sorceress, casting a spell of physical and emotional bliss on him, and he didn’t want it to stop. He wanted it to go on forever. He wanted Audrey to be his own.

  But he already had Rachel.

  He wanted Audrey though.

  He couldn’t have both, but how could he breakup with Rachel? Everything would fix itself between them when she got over her weekend drinking binges. It was just a bump in the long road of love.

  But Audrey’s road looked so much more scenic.

  Audrey pulled her face away and Darren tried to follow with his lips.

  She let out a light laugh and smiled again as she looked up into his eyes. “Thank you for walking me.”

  Darren tightened his grip around her thin waist. He didn’t want her to leave him. He wanted to feel her against him for all of time. He wanted her to come back to his room with him.

  But he couldn’t.

  “My pleasure,” Darren said.

  Audrey smiled up at him, blinking a few times under the dim glow of the lights floating down from the dorm rooms. “I’ll see you at lunch tomorrow.”

  “I don’t want to leave you already.”

  Audrey put her cheek against Darren’s chest and squeezed him in a hug. She spoke with her mouth against him. “I don’t want to leave you either, but we’ll see each other at class in the morning.”

  “I got an idea.”

  Audrey pulled back and looked up at him.

  “Why don’t I meet you right here in the morning,” Darren said. “We can walk to class together.”

  Audrey’s perma-smile enlarged, “I'd like that.”

  Darren reached down and kissed her once. Twice. A long third kiss.

  He couldn’t help himself. He didn’t want to stop.

  Then he thought of Rachel again.

  How could he be doing this, being so unfaithful to the girl he loves?

  “I’ll see you then,” Audrey said, letting her arms fall from his neck.

  Darren hesitated, but let go of Audrey’s waist. “I’ll see you then.”

  Audrey stepped away, gave him a small finger wave, and walked to the building, stealing one quick glance over her shoulder before pulling her card from her pocket and swiping it past the card reader. She hesitated, holding the door open, gave Darren one last wave, and disappeared inside.

  Darren stood immobile, staring at the door that Audrey had vanished behind only moments ago. A chill snapped through his spine, sending a sharp shiver through each limb. He couldn’t peel himself from the spot where he stood to walk to his own building, so instead, he raised his eyes to the window above him, wondering which one was Audrey’s.

  A few windows showed the silhouettes of people in them, and Darren wondered if one of those shapes was Audrey looking down at him, but there was no way for him to tell. How many of these people watched him and Audrey in the midst of their kiss? How many recognized him, and how many of those knew Rachel and were calling her on the phone right now?

  Darren should be safe on the last part at least. He only knew a handful of people on campus. Besides, who could even be able to recognize him from that far away through windows covered in glare, and with such low light?

  Darren was just being paranoid, but he had every reason to be. If Rachel found out that he had just kissed another girl, she would be irate. She would be more than just mad, she might even be in psycho mode. Darren would be best off renting a car and speeding across the border just to keep his limbs intact.

  She wouldn’t find out though. Darren had no intention of telling her, and he was sure that no one saw him and Audrey together. But he still had to deal with the fact that he had just made out with another girl while his girlfriend was only a building away.

  He turned into a cheater. Part of the unfaithful. The scum of the earth.

  But Audrey was so much better than Rachel. Why couldn’t he just dump Rachel and go out with Audrey instead?

  Because he still loved Rachel, that’s why. He had to. He followed her here for school just because they didn’t want to be apart. He couldn’t just destroy everything they built up for three years just to be with a girl he only just met. It wasn’t the right thing to do no matter how bad he wanted to.

  Darren stood in place for a minute, staring up to the windows of the dorm until a cold wind blew across his face. He shivered and hunched his shoulders to try and protect his vulnerable neck from the gust. He kept his eyes on the building for a few more seconds, then turned and headed toward his building.

  Another gust of wind blew across the path, sending a stream of oak leaves bouncing across the walkway in front of him. A pair of voices was carried with the wind, but there wasn’t anybody that Darren could see along any of the intersecting paths.

  Darren glanced up at the southwest dormitory as he passed around the side and then the back of it. He kept his eyes peeled for any sign of Audrey he might notice, no matter how unrealistic he knew he was being. There were hundreds of people in that building, and from down here, he couldn’t tell which shapes were male and which might be female.

  He just needed to get to his room and climb into bed, and forget about Audrey for the night. And Rachel. He needed to clear his mind, sleep a bit, and come back to the whole situation with a refreshed mind. Things will make more sense then, and he can decide what to do then.

  But he already knew what he wanted to do. He just knew that it wasn’t right, and it wasn’t fair to all of those involved. He was thinking for three people right now, but he was the only one who even knew what was going on.

  He knew what he wanted though, he just had to convince himself that it was okay.

  He wanted Audrey.

  Chapter 15

  Darren pushed into his room to find the lights on and Jack sitting at his computer. He dropped his backpack on his desk, let out a sigh, and collapsed into his chair, closing his eyes and leaning back until it felt like it would tip over.

  “Something wrong?” Jack asked without taking his eyes off the computer screen glowing in his face.

  “Just a long day,” Darren said. He couldn’t tell Jack about the kiss with Audrey. Not until he decides what to do about it. “Aren’t you supposed to be at work?”

  “Someone was looking for some extra hours, so I gave them half of my shift.”

  “Such a nice guy you are.”

  “I try,” Jack said. He left his hand on the mouse attached to his computer and turned to look at Darren, half of his face covered in blue light. “Did you talk to the architecture professor?”

  The hatch hadn’t even crossed his mind once he stepped out of
the library. “Yeah, I did.”

  “And…”

  “And I don’t know if you’re going to like what I was told.”

  Jack’s back straightened and his hand slipped off the mouse. “What?”

  “I was told to drop it.”

  “Drop it?”

  Darren nodded. “Forget about Troy, and forget about the tunnel.”

  “The professor told you that?”

  “Those words.”

  “Jeez-Louise. What did you do?”

  “Left, what else could I do?”

  Jack shook his head. “I never expected that,” he said. “Blowing you off, I could see that, but flat out telling you to forget about it?”

  Darren nodded. “I think I was twice as shocked as you were."

  “I would think so.”

  “I just stayed quiet and left,” Darren said. “There wasn’t much else I could do.”

  “Well, it did prove a few things though,” Jack said.

  “What’s that?”

  “Well, not only that the school knows what happened to Troy, but that there is a tunnel below the library, and that they are trying to hide it.”

  “Yeah, I figured all that.”

  “Now, I’m more curious than I was before.”

  “Well, I got more.”

  “More?”

  “I called Troy’s morn.”

  Jack looked more confused than surprised. “His mom? Why?”

  Darren leaned forward in his chair. “She didn’t know anything about what happened to Troy.”

  “She thinks he’s still here?”

  “Yeah, she does.”

  “Did you tell her what happened?”

  “I told her what happened to Troy, but not why we think it happened.”

  “Wow. I bet she’s going to go ballistic and call the school up to find out what’s going on.”

  “I called her a few hours ago, so I bet she’s already done that.”

  “I wonder what she found.”

  “I intend to find out.”

  “You’re going to call her back?”

  “Not tonight, but tomorrow I plan on it.”

  “I wonder what kind of excuse they’re going to tell her.”