Lessons in SECRET

by Crystal Perkins

  If the dress and shoes don’t do enough to enforce the princess look, then my diamonds most certainly do. The necklace features a strand of diamonds, with another curving onto it. Below those is a small flower made of a diamonds, and a big diamond flower with what looks like ribbons of diamonds wrapping around it. If that’s not enough, a small row of diamonds leads to a large oval diamond on the bottom. The earrings and bracelets match perfectly. They can’t outshine my ring, though.

  I’ve never been one for fancy things, including jewelry. But when I saw this ring, I wanted it so bad that I almost cried. Jake wouldn’t let me hear the total, but I know it was high. Hell, just from paying for the bracelet and earrings, I know that my necklace was in the seven figures. It’s the ring that I care the most about, though. I’d give up every other material item in my life to keep this ring. I know I don’t have to, but I would.

  I finish pinning my hair up into the fancy bun Stella taught me and have just applied my last coat of lipstick when my prince knocks at the guest room door. “Come in,” I tell him.

  I turn and lose my breath. I seriously can’t breathe for a moment. I thought he was hot as Mason the teacher, Mase the bad guy, and Jake the military man. But this Jake, the one who was born into privilege? He blows all the other versions away. His tux is obviously custom, and he’s just…I don’t even have words that can convey how perfect he looks.

  “Isa, you’re staying next to me all night.”

  “Where else would I be?”

  “I don’t know, but if any guy besides your friends tries to talk to you, or even looks at you too long, I’m probably going to punch him.”

  “Have you looked in the mirror? I’m going to be the one getting into a fight.”

  “You’re wearing my ring, babe. No one’s going to try anything with me.”

  “Yes they are, but you love me. So it won’t matter.”

  “Not even a tiny iota.”

  We kiss, making a mess of my mouth and his. Neither one of us cares as we put ourselves back together a few minutes later. I grab my clutch, which only has my license, lipstick, and Jake’s gift in it, before we head out to the waiting limo. We talk about Jake’s new job, and his move, deciding to pack up before we leave D.C. I’m due some time off, so it will work out perfectly.

  When we walk towards the ballroom at the hotel, I’m almost blinded by the flashbulbs that go off. Jake makes sure to place my left hand on his arm so everyone can see my ring. When the photographers ask, he introduces me as his fiancé. I hold my head high and smile through my anxiety. I can do this. I am doing this.

  Inside the room there are no more photographers. But there are catty comments and stares. Lots of stares from women trying to make me feel like I don’t belong. They’re wrong, though. There’s no other place on Earth that I belong more than wherever Jake is. He introduces me to everyone and makes sure that there’s no doubt about how much he loves me.

  After successfully dodging his mother for almost an hour, she manages to corner us. “Jake, I need you to come with me. Just for ten minutes. Please.”

  “I’m not leaving Isa. Her friends won’t be here until the press leaves, and she doesn’t know anyone else.”

  “I’ll keep her company,” Vicki says, coming up to hug me. “Go be a good boy.”

  “Thanks,” I tell her when he leaves.

  “I should be thanking you. In fact, I will. Thank you for making my best friend truly happy for the first time in years.”

  “He makes me happy, too.”

  “Good. And girl, look at that ring. And the other jewelry you’re sporting. I knew Jake liked giving out sparkly things, but damn.”

  My stomach sinks a little at her words. “Sparkly things?”

  “Oh yeah. That’s Jake’s saying for jewelry. He didn’t say that to you?”

  “He might have mentioned it.”

  “Well, be prepared to be spoiled. For my birthday last year, he took me to this cool jewelry store near his house and told me to get whatever I wanted. I held back…a little. Seriously, though, my jewelry box is full of baubles from him. I have my eye on a necklace for my birthday next month. I can’t wait to add it to my ‘Jake’ collection,” she says with a laugh. Until she sees my expression. “Oh. Maybe you don’t know. Jake is famous for his necklaces. He used to give them out like candy. And I always got the best ones. Until now,” she says, looking pointedly at my necklace.

  “Take it. It’s yours. Happy early birthday from Jake,” I tell her as I remove it from my neck and thrust it into her hand.

  “What? No, Isa. I didn’t mean…I shouldn’t have said what I did.”

  “I appreciate your honesty,” I say, pulling off my ring.

  “Oh God. He’ll kill me. Put your ring back on, Isa.”

  “Take it or I’ll throw it in the fountain outside.”

  She reluctantly holds out her hand, and I place my dream ring in her palm. It turns out that she held my dreams in those hands all this time. She was just letting me borrow them.

  “Can you also give him something for me?”

  “You should give him whatever you have yourself.”

  “Please don’t make this harder for me than it already is.”

  She closes her eyes and nods. I give her the drawstring bag that holds what I got him. It’s stupid and now I know it won’t mean anything to him, but I want him to have it.

  “Have a great night, Vicki,” I tell her as I walk away from her.

  I start to head for the main doors, but then remember the press outside. There’s no way I can face them alone. I look around for a way to make a quiet exit, but my choices are limited. I see a flash of silver on my right and turn just enough to see Vicki approaching Jake. I have to get out of here before he tries to lie to me again. And then I see my way out.

  * * *

  Jake

  I need to get back to Isa. Vicki will protect her from the vultures, but I don’t like knowing she’s so close, yet not right next to me. I’m planning my exit when I see my mom’s eyes go wide, and she pulls the guy we were talking to away from me. I turn to see Vicki, and I know something’s very wrong. Even if we hadn’t been best friends for almost twenty-five years, I’d know.

  “I screwed up, Jake. I’m so sorry.”

  “Wha—,” I start to ask, and then see her hands.

  She’s holding Isa’s necklace and engagement ring in one hand. And a drawstring bag in the other. “I was jealous of her, Jake.”

  “What have you done?”

  She tells me, and I want to kill her. My best friend betrayed me and hurt the woman I love. All because she was jealous. For no fucking reason.

  “She was cool with our friendship, Vick. She understood that you’re my best friend. Some of her best friends are guys, so she knows it works sometimes. She was never going to try and push me out of your life. But you just pushed her the fuck out of mine!”

  “I didn’t think she’d be so upset. I just wanted her to realize that I’m important to you, too.”

  “You honestly think I didn’t tell her that? How many women have I sent on their way because they couldn’t accept my friendship with you?”

  “Would you have sent her away?”

  And now we get to the heart of the problem. I’m not going to lie to my best friend, though. “No. But I knew I wouldn’t have to.”

  “But you would have.”

  “Yes, Vicki. If I had to choose between Isa and you, I would choose her. Always.”

  “You’re choosing her now.”

  “I won’t have to choose if you help me find her and explain why you lied.”

  “Finding her won’t be too hard. Matt Corrigan just practically ran through the ballroom with a group of people.”

  “Fuck. Let’s go.”

  I’m probably going to get punched. A lot. And this time I don’t even deserve it. I square my shoulders and walk their way.

  As I approach the group outside, I see Ellie and another girl on their kn
ees next to Isa. I already found out that Ellie was undercover, and after talking to Isa, I’m guessing the other girl is Jade. Before we can reach her, Reina steps in front of us.

  “We need to talk to Isa.”

  “She doesn’t want to talk to you.”

  I turn to Vicki. “Tell her from here if you need to, but get the fucking words out.”

  “I lied, Isa.”

  My beautiful, broken girl stands and takes a few steps towards us. “I know. When you said I make him happy, right?”

  “No. That was the truth… and the problem.”

  “Because you love him.”

  “Not like you think. He’s like my brother. No woman has ever understood that, so he’s broken things off with them. I knew he’d never leave you, and it hurt. So I made it seem like I was more special to him than you.”

  “I never would’ve tried to break up your friendship.”

  “I know that now.”

  “You would’ve known that earlier if you’d asked.”

  Vicki nods. “The only jewelry he ever bought me was a pair of diamond earrings for our high school graduation. I buy everything else myself. He told me where he was taking you, and what he joked about with you, but I’ve never been there with him. I swear it.”

  “If you want to be my friend, you can never do anything like this again.”

  “I-I won’t. We can still really be friends?”

  “Yes. You’re important to my future husband, which makes you important to me.”

  Reina steps aside when Isa says that. I grab the jewelry, and the bag, from Vicki before walking to her. I twirl my finger so she’ll turn around, and fasten her necklace back where it belongs. She holds out her hand with a smile, but I shake my head.

  “Jake?”

  “Let’s walk over to that gazebo,” I say, nodding towards it.

  “You can say whatever you need to in front of my friends.”

  “I’d rather do this alone.”

  “I can’t, Jake. I’m scared.”

  I take a step back. “You’re scared of me?”

  “No,” she says, reaching for me. “I didn’t mean it that way. I’m scared about what you want to say to me.”

  I nod, and then say what I need to. “I didn’t put this ring on your finger lightly, Isa. I did it because I love you, and I trust you. I always have. If you look back at our time together, you’ll see that I never once doubted you. I was willing to go to jail for you, and to die for you. I even went to see Gary Griffin today because you said he was like a father to you, and I wanted to make sure he was okay with me marrying you, even if your biological father isn’t. I would do all of those things over again, but I’m not sure I can marry you.”

  “Why? I love you, Jake. I want to be your wife more than anything.”

  “Yet you took this ring off without a second thought. Without coming to me and asking me if what Vicki told you was true.”

  “She’s your best friend. You kept telling me that. I didn’t think she’d lie to me.”

  “Then you should’ve confronted me. In front of that whole fucking room if need be.”

  “You know I couldn’t make a scene like that.”

  “I’m just not going to win with you, am I? You’re never going to see how much it destroyed me to see this ring, the ring I watched you fall in love with and then put on your finger, in Vicki’s hand.”

  I don’t want to walk away. The thought makes me feel physically ill. But if she’s not all in with this, I can’t stay with her. No matter how much leaving her is going to break me. I walk back into the ballroom and look for the nearest bathroom to throw up in.

  “Jake,” Isa yells running past me, to stand and face me, right there at the edge of the room where people can see her. Where they are seeing her because she’s making a little bit of a scene. “I love you. I know that you never doubted us. Neither did I, until this. You could also look back and remember the times I fought for us. You’re right about tonight, though. I didn’t fight for us tonight, and that was probably the biggest mistake I’ve ever made in my life. I can’t promise I’ll never do it again, but I can promise that I’ll try really hard not to. I love you so much. Will you please marry me? I’ll buy you a ring tomorrow.”

  She starts to drop to her knees, but I grab her arm and pull her to me.

  “We’ve already got a ring, babe,” I tell her as I take her hand and slide it back on her finger where it belongs. When the woman you love—who avoids attention at all costs—is ready to get on her knees in a packed ballroom after declaring her love for you for everyone to hear, you know she means what she’s saying.

  “You didn’t answer me,” she says.

  “Yes, I’ll marry you. Of course I’ll marry you. You didn’t need to ask me in front of all these people, you know.”

  “I had to show you that you’re more important to me than my fear of being seen. I’ll probably never do something like this again, but I had to do it now.”

  “I appreciate it more than you could possibly know.” I remember what else is in my hand. “Can I open my gift now?”

  “Sure.”

  I open the little bag and what I see makes me burst into laughter before dipping her down into a kiss. It’s a ribbon with a medal on it. Like you’d get for completing a marathon. Only this one says “The Inaugural Isabelle Carlton Sexathon Endurance Award.”

  “Best. Gift. Ever.”

  And so it begins…

  Reina

  Today’s the big day. The day I marry the man I love. If it was happening for real, I’d be wearing my dream dress and it would be taking place somewhere else. But it’s all fake, a way to keep the Foundation and Society intact. So I’m wearing a dress that looks okay, a ring made up of a stone that’s a color I hate, and it’s all happening in a casino ballroom. It could be worse, but it could also be much better.

  I decide that I probably spoke too soon when a delivery from my husband-to-be arrives. It’s a necklace and tiara that most women would love. But since they’re both made of not only white diamonds, but yellow ones too, I hate them. Almost as much as my big yellow ring. Which I don’t really hate because Matt gave it to me. Even if it’s a hideous color, it came from the man I love so I’d wear it for the rest of my life if I could. Just like the necklace and tiara.

  I’ve been in love with Matt Corrigan since I was seventeen years old, and I know I’ll love him until the day I die. There was a time when I thought he wanted to be with me forever, but whatever happened to him overseas changed him. I know he loves me, but he usually hurts me more than he shows me his cares. And oftentimes, it’s intentional.

  Like all the women he flaunts in front of me. Or flaunted. He promised that it would just be me for the next year, and I believe that he’ll keep that promise. So I’ve got a year to convince him that we’re right together. If I can’t, I don’t honestly know if I can stay on at Corrigan & Co.

  I know I should’ve told Jane that. I should’ve let someone else marry Matt. But I’m too selfish to let that happen. I need this year, and then I need it all from him. I just pray that he’ll finally be ready to give it to me.

  * * *

  Matt

  I guess some men are nervous on their wedding day, but not me. I used to dream of this when I was in the desert. I’d think about making it out of there alive and coming home to her. Reina. She was just a girl when we met, but she was my girl. Until she wasn’t anymore.

  That’s all on me. After what I did, I couldn’t face her again. Or even email with her. I was tainted, and the blood wouldn’t come off. She deserved better. She still does.

  When I saw her again for the first time three years ago, I felt at peace for the first time in forever. She does that for me, she calms the beast that lurks inside of me. I use her, and she lets me. Even when she knows I’ll take another woman to bed the next night. It’s not that she lacks self-respect. She does it because she loves me, and she believes I love her, too. I do. I’d die for her,
and kill for her. I just know I’m wrong for her.

  She should be with a guy who doesn’t carry around the demons I do. But she’s too stubborn to give up on me. And God help me, but I want it to work. I pray every night that I’ll be the man she deserves. So far it hasn’t happened, but I won’t stop the prayers.

  We have one year. One year for her to love me into being a better man. Or one year for me to break her for good. I know which one I want, but I also know which one is more likely. Maybe I need to start praying more than once a day.

  Epilogue

  Tegan

  Reina and Matt’s wedding was everything we all knew it would be—full of unspoken love, and fake romance. It wasn’t the wedding Reina dreamed of as a little girl, and that’s exactly the way she wanted it. She loves Matt more than life itself, and he loves her just as fiercely. But since he won’t admit that, she made sure that none of what happened yesterday was real. They’re really married, but that’s about it. She wore a dress she could tolerate, yellow diamonds she couldn’t, and a smile that anyone with half a brain could tell was fake.

  They didn’t even take a real honeymoon, which is why I’m walking to Reina’s office right now. She called and said that there was someone coming in who needed our help. I just got done with my suspension from missions, so she was offering it to me first. All I know is that it’s some kind of personal protection job.

  I walk into the office, and stop dead in my tracks. The woman in the chair sees me at almost the exact moment I see her, and she rockets to her feet.

  “Tegan?”

  “Hello, Mrs. Hall.”

  “You two know each other?” Reina asks.

  “Yes. We do,” I say, trying not to show any emotion.

  “She can’t be the one. She can’t help. My son would never believe I hired her as my assistant.”

  “Son? This is about Caleb?”

  “That’s none of your business. You made sure of it when you cheated on my son, and broke his heart.”