Lucky Me

by B. B. Donnelly

  He grabs my arm and tries to pull me through the door. I look down scared. His grip is tight. I try to get away, but he keeps a hold of me. No one is paying attention to us. I glance back at Asher and see her kissing him. And that’s all it takes for me to give up and let him drag me away. I have nothing to live for now. My last glimpse is of Asher finally noticing me being pulled away. A look of shock crosses his face and he is trying to get up, but the girl won’t budge.

  I’m pulled through the door and I go willingly with Tim. I’m numb. My mother meets us in a hallway, and we exit the building through a side door. I enter the car with them, and I don’t even hear a word they say to me. There is a buzzing noise drowning them out. I wish I could drown my sorrows away.

  In the car ride home, all I can see in the passing scenery is him kissing that random girl. If he loves me so much, why is he doing this to me?

  When we arrive at the house, I start to walk to my room.

  “Not so fast.” Tim says.

  “Leave me alone.” I say.

  “Not this time. You still need to be punished for wrecking my car.” He says with a sneer. My mother just stands there picking at her perfect manicure.

  “Cindy, we are going to have a little discussion. It’s time Charleigh learns a lesson.”

  “Fine.” She says bored.

  “MOM! No, please, no!” I plead.

  “Charleigh, you need to be punished for disobeying us!” She says. Oh god….

  Tim pulls me into the office again. He locks the door behind him. The sad thing is… I don’t have it in me to fight anymore. I’m worthless. I’m nothing….

  “You little tease.” Tim advances towards me and I know this is going to hurt.

  I’m expecting his fist, but he grabs me and forces his kiss on me. He pushes me to the ground, and I fall on my back. He lands on top of me and starts pulling on my top.

  “You have been teasing me this whole time. I know you want this, you little whore!” He hisses in my ear. I turn my face from him. He pins my arms above my head by my wrists.

  Fight, Charleigh, fight. What’s the point? I mentally shake that thought from my head. I start kicking and thrashing, but it’s no use. He starts licking my chest and grinding himself on me. He is moaning and the more I fight the more turned on he becomes.

  I finally stop moving and he takes one hand, grabbing my face. He kisses me hard, forcing his tongue in. I take my chance. I bite down as hard as I can on his tongue. Blood gushes into my mouth, but I don’t let it go. He starts wailing these awful noises. I finally release him, and he let’s go of me. He kneels back and there is blood flowing down his chin.

  I get up and run past him. I wrench open the door and run through the house. I run out the front door and keep running until I can’t run anymore. I fall to my knees, puking my guts up. When I’m through, I scramble in search for my phone. My first thought is to call Asher and then I remember what he did. I can’t find my phone. It’s in the dressing room.

  I stumble into a lit-up gas station. The girl clerk looks at me in horror. I wipe my mouth and see blood. I rush to the bathroom and look in the mirror. I look like something out of a horror film. My top is ripped, and I have blood on my mouth and chin. I clean myself up and walk back out.

  “Sorry, nosebleed.” I say to the girl. She nods at me but looks at me nervously.

  “Do you have a phone I could borrow?” I ask her.

  “Yeah, use mine.” She says.

  She hands me a cellphone with a cracked screen. I’m so thankful that I have Trix’s number memorized. I dial it quickly and breathe a sigh of relief when she answers after the first ring.

  “Hello?”

  “Trix, it’s me!” I say. I can hear people in the background.

  “Hey, are you coming?” She asks.

  “Yeah, I need a ride! Can you come get me?”

  “Definitely, I’ll call an uber to pick you up!” I rattle off the address after questioning the clerk.

  “Can you pay for it? I don’t have my wallet on me. I’ll pay you back!

  “Sure thing! See you soon!” She hangs up and I go outside to wait.

  I sit on a curb and think how quickly things escalated in my life. One minute I’m living my dream, then my heart gets shattered, and then I’m almost raped. My life just keeps getting better and better.

  The uber finally arrives and takes me to a huge house. I get out and walk into the party. The thumping of the music gives me a headache. Many people stare and whisper as I walk by. I look for Trix, but I don’t see her yet. I keep searching until I spot her in a spacious kitchen with a lot of people. She sees me and cheers.

  “There’s my girl!” She slurs out.

  She immediately hands me her drink and I down it. Drink after drink is thrown back and before I know it, I can’t think. It’s a great feeling when your heart is broken. After everything I’ve been through, being numb is the best feeling in the world.

  Hands grab at me, but the world is spinning and spinning….

  “You are okay now. We are together again.”

  “Ash?”

  “Shhhhh….” Hands start groping my body, but it doesn’t feel like Ash’s hands. I wish the world would stop moving. I push the hand away, but it just keeps coming.

  “Blake! Stop! She wouldn’t want this.”

  “She does too.”

  “She is plastered. Knock it off!”

  “Get the fuck out of here Trix!”

  “No, I already called for help. ASHER!!!!” She yells out.

  “Bitch.” Blake mutters and continues grabbing at my breast.

  “Stop.” I say.

  “Come on, spread your legs.” He demands, breathing hard into my face.

  I shake my head. The next thing I know, Blake is pulled off of me.

  “Hands off, Asshole.”

  “Asher?” I mumble.

  “What are you going to do about it, pretty boy?” Blake says.

  “This.” I hear a loud thump and a body hits the floor.

  The next thing I know I’m being lifted and carried out of the room. I close my eyes because the world is making me sick. I cuddle up into the scent of Asher.

  “Holy shit! It’s Asher Stewart!” I hear people all around talking about him.

  “Move out of the way.” Asher demands. We finally get outside because I feel the air brush across my bare skin.

  “What the hell were you thinking?” Asher whispers.

  “That I love you and you betrayed me.” I say back without opening my eyes.

  He sets me in the car, and I open my eyes. My head hurts and my heart hurts at the sight of him. When he gets in the car, he turns to me.

  “I didn’t betray you. First, we aren’t together, second, she kissed me, and you missed the part where I told her to get off of me. Jesus, Charleigh, when I saw Tim dragging you out of that room….”

  “I went to your house; Tim was going to press charges on you. I paid him off.” He says.

  “He forced himself on me.” I mumble.

  “Did he…did he rape you?” He chokes out.

  “I bit his tongue before he could. It was a close one. I gave up, Asher. I give up. I don’t want to be here any longer. I’m so tired of being alone. I’m so tired of never having someone love me.”

  “Charleigh, you have people that love you. You just got dealt a shitty hand in life. You can either let it drag you down or you rise above it.”

  Asher’s phone rings and he answers it, putting it on speaker.

  “Liz.”

  “Where the hell is Charleigh?”

  “Right here next to me.” He says.

  “Well, there are pictures everywhere of her! She is underage and drinking! People are saying she is just like her cousin.”

  “Shit.”

  “Yeah, we are trying to promote her, and this is how she repays us? She is a PR nightmare!!” I flinch.

  “It will be fine. There have been tons of pictures of me partying and not
hing comes of it.”

  “I don’t know how I should spin this.”

  “I have an idea, but I’ll talk to you tomorrow about it.” He says, hanging up on Liz.

  “What’s your idea?” I ask.

  “Not until you are sober.” He says, putting the car into drive. We drive and come to a ritzy hotel.

  “What are we doing here?”

  “You are not going anywhere near your house and my mom is worried enough. She doesn’t need to see you like this.” I feel ashamed.

  He calls from the parking lot and arranges for us to go in through a back door of the hotel. He doesn’t want to be recognized or probably seen with me. He leads me through the hotel’s kitchen. We take an elevator up to the penthouse. He swipes the key and let’s me enter before him.

  It’s beautiful and I stumble a little to get to the view.

  “Jesus, how much did you drink?” He asks.

  “Not enough.” I respond. He shakes his head and runs a hand through his sexy hair.

  “Thanks, Asher.”

  “Whatever Charleigh.” He huffs out.

  “The bedroom is this way.” He says, pointing at a door.

  I go through the door and enter a spacious room with a bathroom. I walk into the bathroom and stare at myself. I’m a mess. My hair is everywhere, and my makeup is smeared. I use the complimentary toothbrush and mouthwash vigorously. I start a bath and strip out of my clothes. When it is ready, I slide my aching body into the warm water. I scrub my face clean and lean back, relaxed.

  I don’t know how long I’ve been in there because I’m pretty sure I passed out. I come too with Asher standing over me.

  “Holy shit, Charleigh, you wouldn’t answer me!” He exclaims and then notices our predicament.

  I don’t cover myself and stare at him boldly. He glances at my body and then abruptly turns around and walks out. I get out of the tub and wrap myself in a large white towel. I exit the bathroom and find Asher sitting on the edge of the bed.

  “Are you okay?” He asks, not looking at me. I’m tired of him ignoring me.

  “No.” I say. He looks at me in concern and I drop my towel. I stand there before him with nothing covering my body or my feelings for him. I let him see all of me.

  “What are you doing?” He chokes out but doesn’t look away.

  “I need you to show me what it’s like to be loved.” He takes a shuddering breath.

  “Charleigh we can’t.” He says, but his eyes say something different.

  “Love me, Asher.” I state. His eyes darken with lust and I know he wants me as bad as I want him. I come towards him and his breathing gets heavier.

  “Charleigh, put some clothes on.”

  “No.”

  “Fine.” He stands up and grabs the comforter off the bed.

  He comes towards me and starts wrapping it around me. His knuckles brush my nipple and I moan. He closes his eyes and clenches his jaw. He opens them and finishes wrapping me up like a taco.

  “Get into bed.” He commands. I give out a dejected sigh. I really thought that was going to work. The man has better self-control than anyone I know.

  “Sorry, I’m not as good as a groupie.” I mumble. I climb onto the bed and flop on it.

  “Charleigh, it’s not like that. Go to sleep.”

  “Will you at least stay here with me? I don’t want to dream of Tim’s hands on me again. In my nightmares, I never escape the hands….” I mumble off, snuggling into the pillow.

  “Yeah, I’ll stay here.” He says, but I’m already drifting away. I feel his fingers caressing my hair and I know I will dream of him.

  I wake up in the middle of the night and realize I am completely naked. I somehow unwrapped myself from the comforter and am cuddled into Asher’s side. He is out, snoring softly. His shirt is off, and my arm is draped over his waist. My boob is crushed to his side. I don’t dare move. He mumbles something in his sleep. He moves and my arm moves with his body.

  “Yes, Charleigh….” He mumbles still asleep.

  I boldly take advantage of him sleeping. I let my hand drift lower and he moans. I go lower and dip my hand into his pants. He groans and lifts his hips, pushing his hardness into my hand.

  “That’s it….” He mumbles with another groan. I start touching him and it feels amazing to please him. If he was only awake so I could see his beautiful eyes….

  “SHIT!” Asher jerks away from me, pulling my hand out of his pants.

  “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” He bellows.

  “What the hell do you think?” I answer.

  “Charleigh, I said no.”

  “You were dreaming of me, weren’t you? You can’t deny it. I heard you saying my name.” I say. He looks away from me and gets off the bed. He grabs his shirt from the floor and tosses it to me.

  “Put this on. Obviously, you can’t seem to stay covered.” He says.

  “Get some sleep.” He says and walks out of the room. I pull on his shirt and lay back down. Damn him and his self-control.

  It takes me awhile to fall back asleep and when I do, the nightmares begin.

  Tim is standing over my bed, I start to scream, but he covers my mouth. His other hand rips my tank off my body. He pulls my shorts down to my ankles. His body falls on top of me. I can’t move, I can’t breathe…. He let’s go of my mouth and crushes my mouth with his. I try to push him off me. He finally releases my mouth and I scream, but I can’t move. I scream and scream….

  “CHARLEIGH!” Asher shouts my name. I jerk awake and meet his tortured gaze.

  “That bad?” He asks in the darkness. I sob and he pulls me into his arms.

  “I can’t get them to stop!” I exclaim, soaking his chest with my tears.

  “Hey, hey, it’s okay. I swear he will never touch you again.” He says, stroking my hair.

  “I’m so tired….” I whisper. He holds me tight and kisses the top of my head.

  I lift my head and meet his eyes. He stares at me with compassion. There he is. My Asher. I stroke his cheek.

  “Please, make me forget.” I beg.

  “Charleigh….”

  “Please, Asher, please touch me. Take away his touch.” I plead with everything.

  He doesn’t say anything for a few seconds, but just stares at me while fighting an inner battle.

  “Asher….” I whisper his name again.

  He stands up and looks away.

  “Please, Asher, don’t leave me again….”

  Chapter Twenty-One

  He takes a deep breath and then slowly comes back towards the bed. I get up on my knees and he sets one knee down on the bed. I reach for him, but he gently takes my wrist, stopping me. He doesn’t say a word, just let’s my wrist go and takes the bottom of the shirt with both hands. He tugs it up and I lift my arms up. He pulls it over my head and tosses it aside. He stares at my naked body and my body flushes at the look on his face.

  He takes his shaky hands and places them on my waist. I close my eyes and sway towards him. He runs them slowly up and down my sides. His knuckles brush the side of my breasts and I let my head fall back. He comes in closer and kisses my neck with open mouth kisses. His tongue is creating chills down my body. I moan and that’s all it takes.

  He gathers me to him, and my nipples are crushed against his bare chest. I wrap my arms around his neck and tug on his head as he kisses his way to my lips. He kisses me with so much pent up passion I feel like I’m dreaming. It’s everything I’ve ever wanted, for him to lose control. I bring my hand down so I can run my hand down his chest, relinquishing in the feel of his hard abs.

  His hand covers mine and then he lets go. He unbuttons his pants and I hear the zipper. I immediately lower my hand to the opening, but he stops me. He breaks from me and takes his pants off. His boxers follow and I’m staring at the most glorious man. Every inch of him is gorgeous.

  He comes back to me, crawling towards me until I lay back and he is hovering over me. He holds himself up on his elbows and
our eyes connect.

  “Are you sure?” He asks, his voice husky.

  “I’ve always been sure.” I reply, searching his eyes for any doubts.

  He swoops down and claims my mouth. I give him everything in that kiss. I am his. He lowers his body and my softness is cradling his hardness. He starts to move against me, and I moan into his mouth.

  “Protection?” He mutters into my mouth.

  “I’m on birth control.”

  “I’m clean.” He states and the next moment, he enters my body and I gasp at the fullness.

  I’m in heaven. He makes love to me, moving slowly that it’s almost blissful torture. He kisses me with hunger, and I savor every touch. I will never forget how it feels to be connected to him like this. We stare into each other’s eyes and I can tell he is letting down his guard. I see the love he has for me. He is cherishing my body and making this last.

  “I love you.” I whisper into his ear just as we find our release together.

  Our heavy breathing is intertwining, and our chests are in sync. He lays down completely on top of me, still inside of me and I caress his back, lovingly. He turns his head and nuzzles my neck. He pulls out of me and I keep rubbing his back. He plays with my hair and after a few minutes his breathing evens out. I glance over and his eyes are closed. His hand has stilled on my hair and I close my eyes.

  When I wake up in the morning, I’m alone in the bed. There is a note on the pillow.

  All it says is I’m sorry.

  I crumple it up and throw it on the ground. I get up and head to the shower. I cry my tears out with the water running down my face. I guess I was asking for this. I didn’t ask for his commitment. He gave me last night. He gave me what I asked for, but why do I feel so awful? I knew this could happen. I expected it to happen.

  I guess I was hoping for him to surprise me and stick around. I’m so dumb. He is a dream, a childish fairy tale dream that I need to let go of. It’s never going to happen. I had my one night that I will always remember, but that’s it. I’m done chasing after him.

  I’m dressed in my clothes from last night and getting ready to call an uber when the phone rings before I can pick it up.