Rules of the Game

by Lori Wilde

  He had no idea why she was giving him the cold shoulder.

  She knew that when she told him why she had to break up with him, he would deny that he loved Maura more than he loved her. But last night, when he showed her the room full of baby things, when he’d told her he wasn’t going to sell the house after all, the writing on the wall couldn’t have been more clear. If she stayed with him, every time he looked at her, she would think, It’s Maura he’s seeing.

  Her father came down the asile with Breeanne on his arm.

  Breeanne. The baby sister Jodi had devoted her life to caring for, looking radiantly healthy and so much in love. Tears burned the backs of Jodi’s eyelids. No crying. This was a happy day. Breeanne’s day.

  Rowdy stood beside Jake, staring gobsmacked as his bride came toward him. They were going to make such a great couple.

  As her father gave Breeanne’s hand in marriage to Rowdy, and stepped back to sit with his wife, Jodi was forced to look in Jake’s direction.

  He caught her eye, softly mouthed, I love you.

  Her heart somersaulted and it took everything Jodi had in her not to whisper it back.

  CHAPTER 24

  Jodi Carlyle’s Wedding Crasher Rules: Always have an

  exit plan.

  The wedding of pitching legend Rowdy Blanton to Breeanne Carlyle went off like a no-hitter. A rare and beautiful success. No glitches. No mistakes. No one left at the altar. No embarrassing toasts. No overly drunken relatives.

  It was a perfect affair except for one thing.

  Jodi.

  She wouldn’t look at Jake. Would only stand by him when forced by family members or photographers. Would only talk to him in mumbled monosyllables.

  The party was winding down. The bride and groom had already caught a limo to a hotel at the DFW airport where they would catch a flight to Padre Island the following morning. Most of the guests were saying their good-byes. The DJ was packing things up.

  And Jodi was helping the waitstaff clear tables in her bridesmaid dress. Anything, it seemed, to avoid him.

  His heart contracted painfully. Over the course of the past few weeks, his longing for her had flourished like a farm team in a town without any other sports outlet—stretching, growing, expanding. His need for her burned hotter than his desire to be the best ballplayer he could be, and that was pretty damn strong.

  He smiled, moved toward her. “Hey beautiful,” he said when he got close enough for her to hear him.

  They stood amid the remnants of the wedding celebration—confetti strewn on the floor, helium balloons floating across the ceiling, empty champagne bottles on the tables.

  “I don’t need any help,” she said.

  He took her elbow, pulled her up close even though she resisted. “What have I done wrong?”

  “Nothing.”

  “Then tell me what’s going on.”

  The expression on Jodi’s face—understanding but incredibly sad—mixed him up. Why was she sad? He felt like he was slipping down an icy mountain on glass skis. All he wanted was to be with her.

  “I told you from the beginning, Jake, this was a casual thing. Don’t make a big deal of it.”

  He tightened his grip on her arm. “No way, lady. I’m not letting you give me the brush-off without a real explanation. Last night meant something for both of us. I saw it in your eyes. I felt it when you came in my arms.”

  “I don’t know what else to tell you.” Jodi’s voice was so gentle, but he could see the hurt in her eyes. He didn’t know what it was, but clearly he’d done something to cause her pain and she wasn’t going to tell him what it was. “Please don’t make a thing of it.”

  “Jodi,” he said, but then stopped. What was the right thing to say? How could he erase that I’m-about-to-break-up-with-you look off her face? He didn’t want to stick his foot in it and make things worse.

  “Let it go, Jake.”

  “I don’t want to let it go and I think, deep down, neither do you, although I can’t figure out why you’re still so scared. I thought we’d gotten past this.” He reached out to take her hands in his.

  She resisted at first, but he had backed her into a corner, and finally, she relented and let him take her hands. She was so warm, so soft, but inside she was made of steel. He admired that about her, but was that steeliness the very thing that would keep her from listening to him?

  “Talk to me,” he said. “Whatever is eating at you, we can work through it if you just talk to me.”

  She pulled her hands from his, held his stare calmly, fully in control. Of course. That’s what she did best. Stay in control.

  “There’s nothing to say.”

  “I love you, dammit. Doesn’t that mean anything? Haven’t I shown you over and over again how I feel? Aren’t we good together both in bed and out of it?”

  “I’m sorry, Jake,” she said in a robotic voice that ran a saber through his soul. “I simply don’t feel the same way.

  Jodi couldn’t stop sobbing. In the last four days, she’d gone through three boxes of Kleenex, five sad movies, and a whole package of family-sized Oreos. She’d never in her life hurt like this.

  Her family were at their wits’ end. Every day, they dropped by the B&B to check on her. She’d lied and said she had the flu. Mom brought her chicken soup. Dad brought her a little space heater to put beside her bed so she’d stay warm. Kasha brought a humidifier and some homeopathic ointment to put on her chest. She was well loved. She knew it. She had a wealth of family and friends, a thriving business she loved. She didn’t need anything more.

  At least that’s what she told herself. But it was a lie. She needed Jake. Ached for him.

  All you have to do is call him up. Ask him to come back.

  Sure, she could do that, but nothing would have changed. He would still love Maura, while Jodi pined for him to love her the way he’d loved his dead wife.

  No. She couldn’t back down. She had to go through the pain. There was no other way through this. Eventually, the pain would ebb. Eventually, she would be okay. Eventually, she would stop thinking about him constantly.

  Eventually.

  For now, eventually seemed like forever.

  On the Thursday after the wedding, Ham came storming into her boxcar with no more than a cursory knock on the door. “Get out of bed,” he demanded.

  “I’m sick.”

  “No, you’re not.” He tugged on her covers. “Get up.”

  “Go away.”

  “Not until you get up.” He jerked the covers off her.

  “You’re fired.”

  “Nice try. You gotta quit moping around here,” Ham said.

  “You’re not taking my threat seriously.”

  “I’ve worked for you for ten years. I’m your right-hand man. I’ve known you longer than anyone else in your life. You’re not going to fire me.”

  “I already did.” Jodi reached for her tenth Oreo of the day.

  “Give me that.” Ham snatched the cookie from her hand and tossed it in the trash.

  “Hey! I was eating that.”

  “Oreos are not the answer.”

  “What is?” she asked glumly and then burst into tears.

  “You threw him out, so get over it.”

  “It’s not that easy.”

  “Woman, you got stood up at the altar last year, and you suffered a federal investigation. You lived through the scandal with your head held high. If you can survive that, you can survive a measly broken heart.”

  “It’s not the same thing.”

  Ham snorted, sank his hands on his hips. “I can’t believe this is Jodi Carlyle I’m talking to. The Jodi Carlyle I know doesn’t whine and snivel when the going gets tough. She gets busy.”

  “I’m not sniveling.”

  “Hmph.”

  “I’m not.”

  He gave her a dirty look.

  “Okay, maybe I am sniveling a little bit.”

  Ham snorted. “A little?”

  “
Okay, a lot.”

  “Thatta girl. It’s time to fight back.”

  “How do you mean?”

  “Woman up. Get out of that bed and get back to work. It’s good for what ails you.” Ham grabbed hold of her hand and tugged her from the bed.

  He was right.

  She had to get back to work. Work was the one thing that had always saved her.

  “I screwed up big time,” Jake told Talbot. It was Sunday the week after the wedding and he’d circled back to the bar across the street from the stadium after he’d taken LeShaun home from spending the afternoon at the batting cages with the boy. “And I don’t know how to fix it.”

  Talbot took a tug off his beer. “You screwed around on Jodi, huh? Been there. Sucks to get caught.”

  “No.” Jake bristled. “I did not screw around on her. I love Jodi. You don’t treat someone you love that way.”

  Talbot shrugged. “Then how bad can it be?”

  Jake rolled his eyes. “Why do I even bother talking to you?”

  “Because no one else is willing to listen to your sob story.”

  “You’re only listening because I bought you a beer.”

  “True that.” Talbot nodded. “But I’m not your therapist. So what did you do to make her so mad at you?”

  “She thinks I’m only in love with her because she looks like Maura.”

  “Is that the case?”

  “No.”

  Talbot leveled him a don’t-lie-to-me-dude look.

  “Maybe in the beginning her resemblance to Maura was why I was initially attracted to her. I like redheads. Is it wrong to have a type?”

  “When you’ve got a dead wife you were crazy in love with, and she looks like your new girlfriend, um … yeah.”

  “But Jodi is throwing the game before the second inning. Giving up without even seeing if we’ve got what it takes for a pennant race.”

  “No one wants sloppy seconds.”

  “You have such a charming way with words.”

  “It’s a gift.”

  “Jodi is second to no one.”

  “Go tell her that, not me.”

  “I tried to tell her that at the wedding. She doesn’t believe me.”

  “Guess you’ll just have to show her.”

  “How?”

  “I find groveling usually works.”

  “She’s not taking my phone calls.”

  “Better to have loved and lost, my man.” Talbot clamped a hand on his shoulder, dug his fingers into Jake’s skin. “Now could you move? I’m trying to watch the game and you’re blocking the screen. I’ve got a C-note on the Mavs.”

  Jake got up, closed out his tab. “Later.”

  “Hey,” Talbot said. “You could always go for the grand gesture. Women love that shit.”

  “Which is?”

  “How do I know? She’s your woman. You figure it out.” Talbot waved a dismissive hand and went back to watching TV.

  On Monday morning, Jodi stepped out of Old Blue. Skeeter was at her heels. She carried the sheets she’d stripped off the bed and headed for the laundry cart. Her jaw flopped open at the sight of a familiar red Corvette pulling into the parking lot.

  Momentary panic had her glancing longingly at the laundry cart, but no she wasn’t going there. She wasn’t scared of Jake. She was brave enough to stand here and listen to what he had to say.

  Jake got out of the car looking as devastatingly handsome as ever.

  He smiled.

  Her knees melted. Do not fling yourself at him, she told herself, struggling to breathe. At least not until he gets a little closer.

  The wind blew against her, the February cold whipping against her skin, but his smile warmed her up inside as surely as a fire in her potbelly stove.

  “Hey,” he said, stopping a few feet away from her.

  Skeeter trotted over to him, wagging his tail joyfully, and Jake leaned down to scratch the dog’s nose.

  When he straightened, Jodi tightened her grip on the sheets to keep from flinging them on the ground and jumping into his arms.

  His eyes were soft, welcoming. “You’re wearing it,” he said. “Our perfume.”

  The way he said “our” sent her heart slamming into the wall of her chest. He took a step toward her. She stayed rooted, scarcely daring to hope that they could fix what had torn them apart.

  “I sold the house in Jefferson,” he said.

  “Did you?” she whispered.

  “Got a good price too.”

  “That’s great.”

  “I realized belatedly that when I told you the last night we spent together that I was thinking about hanging on to the house, you thought it meant that I was still hanging on to Maura.”

  “You’re not?”

  “No.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Yes.”

  “You called Maura’s name in your sleep,” she said. “That’s why I freaked out. Even though you told me you were ready to let go of her, clearly your subconscious was not and when you woke up and suggested keeping the house …” She gulped. “Well, I thought …”

  “You were wrong,” he murmured. “Yes, I did dream of Maura, but in the dream, she gave me her blessings and told me to let go of her. It wasn’t until then I realized I was still hanging on to my grief. I suggested keeping the house because I wanted to have a place near you, not because it reminded me of Maura. But I understand now how insensitive that was. You aren’t second fiddle to anyone, Jodi. I hope you know that.”

  “I overreacted. I admit it. I was just afraid you could never love me the way I love you.”

  Jake looked amused. “I wouldn’t say overreacted. But when you dig in your heels about something, you can be pretty stubborn,” he said with the utmost admiration, like her stubbornness was a diamond-studded quality. “And I was afraid to take the risk that you would pull the plug on us.”

  “It happened anyway.”

  “I hate that I hurt you.” Regret sharp and colorful as the Great Barrier Reef swam in his eyes.

  “I was blindsided.”

  He nodded, his eyes graveyard somber. “I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.”

  “Forgiveness isn’t the issue. I’ve already forgiven you everything. I will always forgive you, Jake.”

  “I can’t lose you. I’ll do anything you want to prove to you that you’re the one I love.” He took something from his pocket, sank down on one knee.

  Twin fists of panic and elation hit her. “What are you doing!”

  “Jodi Carlyle, will you—”

  But he didn’t get any further than that because Skeeter thought he was playing and hit him in the back and Jake went somersaulting down the hill toward the stream and Jodi burst out laughing.

  And everything just felt impossibly right.

  She trotted over to where Jake was laid out on the ground by the stream staring up at her, the ring box still in his hand. He flicked it open with his thumb. Showing off a big, fat diamond inside.

  “Marry me?” he asked.

  She burst out laughing, and reached down a hand to help him up, but he pulled her down on top of him. She tumbled against that hard chest and looked into his amazing eyes.

  “Say yes,” he prompted, and wrapped his arms around her.

  “Or what?” she teased.

  He tightened his grip. “Or I’ll never let you go. No wait. Scratch that. I’m never letting you go regardless.”

  “Umm, I think that might be kidnapping.”

  “Not if you’re a willing participant.”

  “I see your point.”

  He laughed and kissed the tip of her nose. “Have I told you lately that I’m crazy for you, Jodi Carlyle?”

  “Not lately, no.”

  “Well, I intend on telling you every single day of your life,” he said, and sealed his promise with the most heartfelt of kisses.

  “I love you, Jake,” she whispered. Telling him to his face for the very first time. “I love you.
”

  “Jodi,” he whispered, and squeezed her hard. “I love you so damn much.”

  It might not have been the most poetic of declarations, nothing flowery or pretentious, but it came from his heart, from the very core of who he was.

  “I would do anything for you,” he said. “Forever and always. I hope you know that.”

  “Jake.” His name was a pearl that dropped from her lips. “Jake.”

  He kissed her, cradled her head in his hands, held her captive with his gaze. “You are mine and I am yours.”

  “Jake.”

  “I will spend the rest of my days looking after you. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

  “Jake.” Her hands were in his hair, her eyes full of him. She wanted more. She felt her pupils widen as she drank him in. She could never ever get enough of this man. “You have made me whole.”

  “No. It’s you who saved me. Challenged me. Tested me.” He dropped fresh kisses on her face—her eyelids, her cheeks, her chin. “Loved me. Forgave me.”

  She smiled at him. A smile filled with hope.

  He kissed her again, and she could feel the passion rising in them both. She clung to his shoulders, arched her hips against him.

  “More,” she murmured. “I want more of you. Take me inside. Take me.”

  His laugh purred over her ears. “God, I love you. How did I go so long without you?”

  “I could ask the same question.”

  The joy in his kiss took her to places she’d never been before. Together they scaled the highest peak a man and woman could go together. One updraft after another took them higher and higher as pleasure drew soft moans from them both, as their bodies gave and received the ultimate treasure of the flesh.

  He showed her just how much she meant to him in the most elemental way possible, through a joining that transcended time.

  She had started this venture to prove she could have a casual affair and walk away unscathed and he’d shown her that she simply could not. She was a woman built for love. And he was a man built to give it.

  His mouth devoured her. He flowed into her and she flowed into him and neither could tell where one started and the other began. They were complete.

  In her joy, Jodi’s heart rose like a phoenix shooting for the sun, brilliant in her flaming ascent, alive—fully alive—for the first time in her thirty years.