Gwyneth

by Christine Sterling

  “But,” Gwyneth went to protest.

  “No,” Aedan said, interrupting her. He got up from the chair and pointed at her belly. “You need to start thinking of that one. Why would you put yourself in such danger when you have no one to help you? What would you do if something did happen? We wouldn’t know until it was too late.”

  Gwyneth contemplated this statement. Honestly, she was scared about the journey, but she didn’t want to ask Aedan to help her. She wanted to stay independent of him, since she didn’t want to find herself relying on him when he could leave whenever he wanted. But she had to start thinking about her little one; she couldn’t be reckless.

  “So, we will journey together,” commanded Aedan.

  “Yes,” she said, with more confidence than she felt.

  Chapter Five

  The next day, everyone helped load the wagon with as much game as they were able to take from the smokehouse. The boys watched them climb into the wagon. When Gwyneth turned and saw the boys standing there with forlorn looks on their faces, she hopped back down and opened her arms. All three boys ran into them and wrapped their arms around her protruding belly.

  “Duw gyda chi. Rwy'n dy garu di,” she whispered as she kissed the tops of their heads.

  “What does that mean?” Arnold asked.

  “God is with you and I love you.”

  “You do?” Harley asked.

  “Yes, I do. Very much. Now be good boys while I’m gone. Listen to Arnold and get your chores done. There are leftover beans and cornbread for lunch. If everything is done by the time we get back, I’ll make you fried chicken for dinner.”

  Jess licked his lips, gave Gwyneth another squeeze and ran towards the back of the house. “I’ve got to get busy! Bye, Ma!”

  Gwyneth gave a little gasp and put her fingers to her lips to prevent herself from crying.

  She climbed back up in the wagon and Aedan clucked to the horses and the wagon jolted forward.

  Gwyneth waived back at Arnold and Harley until they disappeared from view.

  They stayed silent in the wagon. She felt awkward, but she didn’t know how to break the silence. She had tried to find openings for them to talk when they were at the house, but there never seemed to be times when they were alone. The boys were always there, and then at night, when the boys went to sleep, Aedan seemed to be in his own world. He would dismiss her with a stern good night, before he went back to his whittling or to sleep on the couch, where he had made his bed.

  She was rather intimidated by him; she thought that maybe it was the sheer size of him. But it was also his looks. She caught herself looking at him and she couldn’t shake the butterflies that were threatening to leave her body. He gave her shivers in a good way. As she thought about it now, she turned her face away, afraid that he would easily be able to read it.

  “What’s wrong?” Aedan asked, as he looked at her.

  Gwyneth turned back quickly. “Nothing is wrong,” she managed to get out.

  “I saw that your face had turned bright red, so I wasn’t sure if you were feeling sick or not. The path is kind of bumpy and I imagine it’s not a fun ride when you are with child.”

  “No, I am not sick.” Gwyneth said, “I think I just got something caught in my eye that became irritating.”

  “Well, if you need my help in finding it, I would be happy to help.”

  “No!” she said, a little too loudly for her liking, before she recovered her composure. “I was able to find it, so there is no need to worry about it,” she added.

  “Well, whatever you need, I’m happy to help. I don’t know how I can repay you or the boys. Opening your home to a stranger must not have been easy.”

  “It wasn’t,” she answered honestly. “But it was the right thing to do.”

  “Yes, of course,” he said with a chuckle. “If you don’t mind me asking, how old are you?”

  Gwyneth thought the question was a bit odd, but she was happy to oblige him. “I’m twenty-three.”

  “Oh wow, you are quite young then. You must have been very young when your first was born.”

  “My first?” Gwyneth questioned.

  “Arnold.”

  “Oh no,” Gwyneth said with a laugh. “They aren’t my biological children. I caught Arnold with his hand in one of my traps. I was about to give him a tongue lashing he would never forget, but he told me his father had just died and he wanted to feed his family. I couldn’t just let them suffer. So, I asked them to live in the house with me, as more of a business arrangement. They would help around the house while I hunted at night.”

  “That was a very nice thing for you to do, to open up your house like that.”

  “It was an easy thing for me to do. I knew they needed the help, and I could use the help since I’m on my own.”

  They continued on a bit more, until the silence became too great again and he spoke once more. “You were married before?”

  “Yes.”

  “What was your husband like?”

  Gwyneth thought about the question. This was to a man who had never met her husband. Would she be able to talk freely? She had always been afraid to say the real character of her dead husband. But the more she thought about it, the more she asked herself, what was the point of protecting a dead man?

  “My husband was not a kind man. In fact, I was rather surprised as to why he wanted to be a husband at all.”

  “How did you meet?”

  “Through an article I found in a newspaper.”

  Aedan almost stopped the wagon. “So, you were a mail order bride?”

  Gwyneth didn’t hesitate. “Yes.” She wasn’t ashamed of her decision to become one.

  “I’m sorry if I seemed mystified. I just see that you are a kind, beautiful woman. I can’t see why you would find it hard to get a husband. They must have been banging down your father’s door.”

  Gwyneth laughed at his response, very flattered by his words. If only he knew, she thought to herself. But then how could he know; she had kept this a secret from everyone, not knowing who she could trust. Could she trust him? But she realized she was carrying around this secret for nothing; what was the point of having secrets if she had no one she could trust with them?

  “I’m an immigrant,” she said softly. She had always been afraid to admit such a fact, that the words came out hoarse and foreign to her ears. “I came from Wales. My parents moved here when I was young to have a better life than the one we had back in England. I have bits of memories of our old home, but not enough to know what I am missing. And the move was good for my family; my Da was able to get the job he needed to provide for us.

  “But, it wasn’t that easy for me. I went to a school in town where I wasn’t treated the best for how they perceived me. The girls hated me. And the boys? They didn’t pay me enough attention to even notice. I wasn’t worthy of their time. I was too foreign for them to bring home to their mothers. So, I knew I would never be able to find a good husband there. That’s when I saw the ad in the newspaper to come out here to Wildcat Ridge to marry someone. I was so happy to finally be able to meet someone who would want me.”

  “I understand. My family is from Ireland.”

  “I heard the brogue in your voice, but you said you were from Montana.”

  “My family moved there for work. My Da worked with horses.”

  “That must be fascinating work.”

  Aedan thought for a moment. “Honestly, I don’t remember. I just know I like animals.” They rode in silence for a bit more before he turned to her. “Continue with your story. You had just moved to Wildcat Ridge.”

  “Oh yes. I was naive to think that he would be any different than how I was treated at home. And if I am being honest, he was different. He didn’t hate me because I was foreign; I have a suspicious feeling he hated me because I was a woman. It wasn’t easy to be living with him. He was a cruel, mean man. He would take his frustrations out on me, because he wasn’t strong enough to look in the
mirror to see that he was the one that was the failure.”

  She took back the sleeve of her right arm, showing him the burns on her arm she still had from him. “I’ll carry these with me until I die, as a reminder of my mistake. I knew that if I stayed, I would probably die by his hand. I had tried my best to avoid him as much as I could. And even when I had to, I had learned some remedies to take in order to make sure that I wouldn’t become pregnant.” It was more shame than she had wanted to admit to him, but now that she was confessing, it was coming out like a river from her mouth to his ears.

  “But then one day, I just knew that I was with child. And when I had to live for someone else, I knew I had to escape. I bided my time, slowly trying to build a way for me to leave him. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to escape, but I knew I had to try. I prayed daily for a reprieve. But it didn’t come until the mine disaster. Clint died as a result of the mine explosion.”

  She knew that was not good for her to refer to her husband’s death as a God-send. But she truly believed that it was an angel who intervened by making sure her husband would never harm her again.

  They rode in silence once more and Gwyneth was afraid she had scared him with her words. There was a reason why she didn’t want to tell any more of her innermost thoughts; woman weren’t supposed to think like this. She just hoped he wouldn’t want to leave as soon as he had the chance, as she was starting to like his presence around her. He was a breath of fresh air in a world that was starting to make sense for her.

  “I’m sorry for the life you had to have these past few years,” he finally said solemnly.

  Gwyneth looked up at him, knowing that he was being truthful with her. She smiled to herself; he didn’t ask her any other questions. And as time passed, she knew that if she had to pinpoint a time when she had started to fall in love with him, she would always recall this moment as being the first step in that direction.

  The trip to Curdy’s Corner was a success. They had met with Elijah, the pastor at the church there and he graciously took the supplies they had brought to him, paying them in silver coins. He ordered more meat for the following week and Gwyneth was glad for the new business. She had asked him to recommend her to his friends and he was happy to oblige.

  When Elijah met Aedan, he was quick to comment on how smart and beautiful his wife was. When Gwyneth realized that Elijah was referring to her, she couldn’t stop blushing. She noticed that Aedan didn’t correct him; she didn’t know if that was because he didn’t want to waste time to do it, or if he was actually thinking of her as his wife.

  She didn’t want to broach the subject because again, she didn’t want to get attached to a man that had every reason to leave and no reason to stay. She didn’t want to get too selfish and ask for him to stay with her. She didn’t want to be that woman. She wanted him to stay because he wanted to.

  It was almost nightfall as they got to the house. When they parked outside, she noticed that there was another wagon there. She didn’t recognize it at first, but as she got closer, there was no mistaking the old mahogany. She jumped off the cart, not heeding the warning in Aedan’s voice as he called after her.

  She flung the door open, to see Mortimer sitting at her table. He had a cup of tea in front of him. Arnold was sitting at the other end, with the two small boys cowering behind him.

  “What are you doing here?” Gwyneth asked, her voice laced with anger. She couldn’t believe this man was in her own home without her there! And he seemed to be terrorizing her children. Her children. A momma bear would have nothing on her if he harmed one hair on their heads.

  “I thought I would come visit, see how you were doing. Asking what you thought of the gentleman callers I had sent over. Seems however, you were quite busy during the time. You have quite the knack for bringing unwanted children into your home.”

  Gwyneth winced at the harsh words, knowing he said them to cut her deep. He was talking almost like how her husband would talk to her and she had vowed to herself with his death she would not be treated that way. She was about to open her mouth and tell him this, when Aedan walked through the door.

  “Who are you?” he asked, his eyes questioning the presence of a man he had never seen before.

  Mortimer was even more taken aback; it seemed that he didn’t know about Aedan either, even though Gwyneth had suspected he had planted spies to watch her movements. Without acknowledging him, he turned back to Gwyneth. “So, you think you can embarrass me, after all I have done for you? You bring this man into your house? I knew you were dumb, Gwyneth, but I didn’t know you were a loose woman.”

  Gwyneth lost the breath to tell him to leave. The anger that she had swirling around her body deflated, leaving her empty and flat. She didn’t know what to say in response; it was her worst fear realized. It was only a matter of time before the whole town knew what kind of woman she was.

  Aedan never gave her time to think about that. He walked up to Mortimer, pulling him up by the collar so that his head was level with Aedan’s. “You are not to speak of her like that!” he shouted. Mortimer’s eyes became wide, as he stared up at Aedan. “I don’t know who you are, but I want you to leave this house. And if I ever catch you here again, I will make sure it’s the last thing you do!”

  He threw Mortimer to the ground, where he fell like a brick. He scrambled back, getting up and brushing off his pants. He probably thought he was going to deal with a helpless lady; he would not be so unsuspecting next time and would probably bring an entourage, Gwyneth thought to herself, if there ever was a next time.

  She saw the sheer rage in Mortimer’s face. “You will regret this, mark my words.”

  Aedan went forward, putting his arms up. Mortimer stepped back quickly, almost falling over himself trying to get to the door. Quicker than she had ever seen someone move, he was gone, and she could hear the wagon creaking along.

  When it seemed to be safe, Gwyneth turned to the boys. “Are you all right?” she asked.

  Arnold shook his head, as Harley and Jess ran into Gwyneth’s arms. “He forced his way into the house. He kept asking where you were; we promise, we didn’t say anything,” Harley added quickly, as he buried his face in her chest. “Arnold did his best to keep him from doing anything.”

  She looked up at Arnold, who seemed to be trying desperately to show that he held it together. But she could see the underlying fear in his eyes. She made the motion to open her arms wider, for him to come to them.

  Arnold hesitated at first, until the call was too great. He joined his brothers in the hug. Gwyneth knew then that no matter how mature Arnold acted, he was still a child and she needed to remember that. She had to stop relying on him like she had been; she had become too careless and reckless.

  “Why was he here?” she asked.

  “He wanted to know where you were,” answered Jess. “He kept asking us if we knew about this still. He wanted to know if we were selling alcohol.”

  “He said that Dinky was drunk, talking about getting alcohol at a special place. He thought this was the special place,” Arnold said.

  Dinky Moon hadn’t been sober since his wife left him. He was the resident drunk in Wildcat Ridge.

  Why would Mortimer think that? She was aware of her husband’s side business, but it wasn’t anything that should be on the gold baron’s radar. As far as she knew, it was a fledgling business. Surely Mortimer would know that she had nothing to do with that? And she didn’t know anything about how to make alcohol.

  As the boys finally disentangled themselves from her, she told them that was enough excitement for the day and it was time for them to get ready for bed, as they had a big day ahead of them. As the boys left, she could feel the tension in the air between her and Aedan. She knew that she was going to have to explain to him this situation and she didn’t know if he would react in a positive way.

  Chapter Six

  Late July

  Aedan looked at the smokehouse again. He had been here a few days
ago and he noticed that there was meat missing. He had gone hunting the past few days, making Gwyneth stay in the house at night. She had protested with all her might, but Aedan finally put his foot down; she was close to giving birth, and he wasn’t going to have her out in the woods somewhere where he couldn’t get to her.

  So, he hunted for them.

  While he didn’t remember any of his past life, he realized that he still maintained the skills he had learned in the past 10 years. Hunting was not something he had known when he was on the farm. It made him wonder what kind of man he was. Did he have a family somewhere that he was neglecting? It was always a nagging thought in his mind. He knew his parents were dead, but nothing else. He wished he could remember, if only so he could absolve the guilt he was feeling.

  He felt sure if he had a wife or children somewhere he would remember them. But when he tried to think of what his wife might look like, images of a fiery Welshwoman filled his head.

  It had only been a few weeks, and he knew he was already falling in love with Gwyneth. He thought she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Even dressed in buckskins, she exuded femininity. Her long blonde hair that she kept piled loosely on her head. Her big blue eyes with those long lashes, that would look at him in wonder. Her berry-colored lips. Aedan groaned thinking about her lips. And she was the perfect height for him to wrap in his arms and place his chin on her head. Not that he had done that, mind you. But he did think about wrapping her up in a hug.

  He didn’t know if it was as simple as her smile or the strength of her heart. She was self-sacrificing, taking in the boys and then him, into her house when it would be a burden on her. She was going to be a new mother soon, and even though she protested to him, telling him that she needed the extra hands, he knew that she was strong enough to survive on her own.

  He loved his new family, though he was scared to even let them into his heart. He knew that they weren’t really his; he was just playing house. He didn’t know if he could trust these feelings. What was the point of loving her if it would just go away as soon as he remembered his former life? And would he want to go back? He was already comfortable with his new one.