X-Rated Bloodsuckers fg-2

by Mario Acevedo

  "And your father?"

  "He died of plague. Some said it was divine justice for turning La Malinche into his little knish." Coyote smiled, the pallor of sorrow evaporating. "I also heard that my father died masturbating. His final words at orgasm were viva Mexico."

  Coyote blinked uncomfortably. Driving under the intense California sun made my eyes water and burn as well. I replaced my sunglasses. Coyote fished a pair of shades from the breast pocket of his jacket. A paper clip held the left temple to the lens frame.

  Coyote motioned abruptly as we neared a traffic light. "Here. To the left."

  We headed east for several blocks along Vernon Avenue. I explained my investigation as it had progressed so far. Katz Meow and the Araneum had brought me to L.A. Now Katz was missing. And my two prime suspects-porn king Cragnow Vissoom and corrupt developer Lucky Rosario-were each looking over their respective shoulders and had asked me for help.

  Coyote listened and nodded. When I was done he said, "Si. Mucha caca."

  I knew that. A big help he was.

  Coyote directed me into the parking lot of a bowling alley, a cinder block building bearing the name Majestic Lanes in faded plastic letters along the front. Trash littered the bottom of the walls and front sidewalk. Liquor bottles sparkled among the weeds. Cars crowded the spaces closest to the building. There was a muffler shop and beauty salon across the street.

  I found a spot between a Jaguar and a Bentley, cars that looked as out of place here as would a pair of albino elephants. "Pretty fancy wheels for this dump. What's here?"

  "Dinner," Coyote replied. "And a concert for the damned."

  "Who's the damned?"

  "We are," he replied.

  Chapter Nine

  I followed Coyote toward the entrance of the Majestic Lanes. "We're eating at a bowling alley?"

  "I am," he replied. "Don't know about you. But we're here not just for refin. I want you to meet Rebecca Dwelling."

  Katz said Rebecca worked at a secret place where humans intermingled with vampires, no doubt a chalice parlor. Talking to Rebecca could clear away some of the smoke in this investigation, as she might know what happened to Katz.

  I examined the broken neon and cracked plastic on the facade. "Good disguise. This is the last place I'd think to look for a chalice parlor."

  "?Vato, estas loco?" Dude, are you crazy? Coyote chuckled. "This ain't no ordinary parlor."

  We stepped into the shadow of the front awning. Coyote gripped the door handle when he stopped abruptly. "Smell that?"

  I caught only warm asphalt, gasoline, and dirty bowling shoes. "What is it?"

  "Un lobo."

  A wolf in Los Angeles meant that a transformed vampire was close by. Vampires didn't transform into wolves unless they expected getting, or making, serious trouble.

  I closed my eyes and sniffed again. There it was, that faint musky odor.

  I checked left and right. If a wolf came for trouble, I'd give it to him. "Why would a vampire risk running through L.A. as a wolf? And in the daytime?"

  "Maybe he wasn't running through the city," Coyote answered. He put a finger to his lips and whispered, "Maybe he turned into a wolf to sit and listen."

  It was as a wolf that a vampire's senses were at their most keen. Transforming into a wolf was common practice when stalking special prey.

  Who was his prey?

  Me? If so, he was in for a surprise.

  Coyote? I looked at my scruffy and wily partner. Good luck catching him.

  Then who?

  Rebecca.

  "Where's the wolf?" I asked.

  "Don't know. The scent is cold."

  "Let's go find Rebecca." Grasping Coyote's arm, I hustled him through the entrance and toward the rumbling of bowling balls and the crashing of pins.

  Most of the lanes were occupied. I peeked over my sunglasses. Everyone had a red aura. If this was a chalice parlor, where were the vampires?

  Coyote led me across the carpeted aisle on the upper level, looking down on the lanes. He turned the corner and approached a gray metal door marked EMPLOYEES ONLY.

  He opened the door and we entered a dark corridor sloping to the left, parallel to the lanes and filled with the racket of machinery, bowling balls, and pins.

  Coyote removed his sunglasses and so did I. A red bulb illuminated the corridor. An oily, mechanical odor from the pin machines grew more intense the farther we walked down the incline.

  At the back of the hall, Coyote stopped before a metal cabinet. Dents and graffiti covered the front. Coyote opened the double doors of the cabinet and ducked inside. The back of the cabinet swung away. Coyote stepped down, as if descending stairs.

  I followed him, taking care to shut the cabinet doors behind me.

  We were on a metal landing. Stairs led to another door beneath the Majestic Lanes. The door had a placard for a Cold War Civil Defense shelter. We climbed down. The muted crashing of the bowling machinery rumbled through the concrete wall. Coyote knocked on the door.

  A view port at face level opened. A pair of shiny vampire eyes peeked out. I expected Coyote to say, "Jose sent me."

  But he said nothing and the door swung open. Our orange auras must have been our pass in.

  Jazz music flooded out, a raunchy blare of saxophones against the energetic accompaniment of a keyboard, guitar, and drums. The aroma of fresh human blood sent my nostrils tingling and my mouth watering. No trace of a wolf.

  A vampire bouncer waved us through. He was huge and his muscles were overinflated; most likely he was a steroid juicer before he was converted to the undead.

  Laughter and playful snarls swirled around us. Orange and red auras filled the room. The psychic glows flashed gaiety and lust. The ambience was a combination Juarez cantina and Chicago speakeasy. A sign on the wall read: NO UNDEAD CONVERSIONS ON THE PREMISES. NO SEX ON THE TABLES. NO DANCING ON THE CEILING.

  Below that, someone had scrawled with a black marker: AND TIP, YOU CHEAP BASTARDS.

  Vampires crowded the bar to my right. A naked female chalice lay facedown across the top. Blood seeped from puncture wounds lacing her shoulders, buttocks, and the back of her thighs. The vampires around her sipped cocktails and chatted, stopping occasionally to lap and nibble on the chalice, as if she were a plate of hors d'oeuvres.

  More vampires sat at the tables lining a terraced auditorium, which faced a stage. I guessed that the place, with its low black ceiling, could hold a hundred patrons.

  Six musicians-humans-played on stage, three women sax players, the rest men. They wore either scarves or leather collars to cover bite marks and advertise their status as chalices. Sequined jackets sparkled under the colored spotlights. The women swayed on bare legs in tempo to the music. Their costumes were just the jackets, plus black bikini briefs and shoes. The women looked delectable, but the men, in loafers and with hairy bellies sagging over their briefs-well, that was a taste others preferred.

  Coyote pointed to the woman at the far right of the combo, the short one with a gymnast's body, stocky and muscular. "That's Rebecca."

  She had a round, pretty face that placed her anywhere from sixteen to the midtwenties. Her cheeks puffed and her ponytail wobbled as she wailed on the sax.

  "Why not get us drinks and nachos," Coyote said, "while we wait for Rebecca to finish this set."

  I stopped a passing chalice waitress. She was dressed-or to be more precise-barely dressed with costume beads looped over her naked shoulders and perky breasts. Metallic glitter freckled her face and torso. A studded red leather collar encircled her delicate neck. She wore tap pants, mule pumps tied with ribbons around her ankles and calves, and a silly pillbox hat resting at a slant over her brown hair.

  We ordered the day's special-a fanged martini: the house vodka, vermouth, and type O-positive.

  The waitress smiled and turned about. The bottom curves of her firm butt winked from under her tiny pants.

  Coyote motioned toward an empty table that offered a clear view to the
stage. "Over there, where we can keep an eye on Rebecca."

  The band started a fast and raucous rockabilly tune. Vampires whooped and crowded the floor. They shuffled and kicked and flung their chalice dance partners. Some of the vampires leapt and clung to the ceiling, dancing upside down, their feet knocking pieces of acoustical tile to the floor. Now I understood the rule about no dancing on the ceiling.

  This was the concert for the damned? Lucky us.

  What about this joint? Every other chalice parlor I'd been to before had the languid mood of an opium den. This place had a happy hour, dancing-a cold breeze tickled the back of my neck-and air-conditioning. How could so many vampires and chalices congregate without the local human populace finding out?

  Our waitress arrived with drinks and the plate of nachos, which was drizzled with melted cheese, diced jalapenos, and-from the aroma-goat's blood. She had twenties and hundreds heaped on her tray.

  Who raked in all this money? I could smell the graft. Certainly this parlor-make that saloon-pointed to the vampire-human collusion I'd been sent here to investigate.

  Coyote flipped through a jukebox-type device on the table. Instead of songs, each tab on the device listed a chalice on the menu with a photo and description.

  F 9. Jason-a thirty-year-old Asian male from Newport Beach. Type B-negative. Very lean. Smoker. Hearty metallic taste with pepper and menthol notes.

  "Naw. Muy flaco." Coyote raised his voice. The music was very loud. "Too skinny. Plus it took me a hundred years to kick my nicotine habit. I fang him and boom, I'm back to those goddamned Marlboros."

  He kept flipping and stopped on G 34. Darlene-a forty-six-year-old from Willowbrook. Type A-positive.

  "Bien gordita. I like them chunky." Coyote touched the order button. "She okay for you?"

  In her picture, Darlene looked plump, happy, and most delicious, as juicy as a marbled steak.

  "Sure," I answered. "But don't order until after we've met with Rebecca."

  "Bueno." Coyote pulled his finger off the order button. "You can cover the check, no? I'll owe you until payday."

  "I didn't know you had a job."

  "I don't. But with the economy turning around, I'm optimistic. I've got resumes all over town, ese." Coyote tugged at my elbow and leaned close. "I've even applied as a pilot with Pan American." He winked.

  "Pan Am went under years ago," I said. "Don't expect them to call."

  "I'm not," Coyote said, laughing, "because I don't have a phone."

  The band played harder and faster. The dancers hurried their frenetic pace to match the rhythm. The finale had the subtlety of a bottle truck smashing into a fireworks stand.

  The band members, their bodies glistening with sweat, bowed to rowdy applause. The curtain closed before them. The house lights brightened. Vampires and chalices returned to their chairs.

  I sipped my martini, munched nachos, and surveyed the surrounding vampires as I looked for an aura that betrayed danger.

  Coyote scooped blood with a nacho chip and crunched on it. "?Nada, verdad?" Nothing, right? "Maybe the wolf presence has nothing to do with us or Rebecca."

  "You believe that?" When on a trail leading from murder, there was no such thing as a coincidence.

  A door to the left of the stage opened. The band filed out. Coyote and I remained seated, finishing our drinks as we waited for Rebecca to appear.

  A minute passed and still no Rebecca. My kundalini noir sounded the alarm.

  I folded a twenty under my martini glass, got up from the table, and approached the band members milling around the door. Coyote followed.

  "Where's Rebecca Dwelling?" I asked.

  The keyboard player replied, "In the dressing room."

  Coyote and I went through the door and behind the stage.

  Towels damp with sweat lay strewn on chairs and the floor. A chalice tidied up the place.

  "You seen Rebecca?" I asked.

  He pointed to a door at the far end. "She and a customer left that way."

  "Vampire?"

  "What other customers do we have?"

  Smart-ass.

  Coyote and I hurried past him. The other vampire had beaten us to Rebecca. Why hadn't I anticipated this? I should have told Coyote to stay behind in case the vampire and Rebecca came out another way.

  The door opened to a hall that led past the storage rooms, the kitchen, and finally to the bar. And the way out. Damn.

  Coyote and I went up the maze we'd come through and back to the bowling alley. I put on my sunglasses. Better not get careless and give myself away to unsuspecting humans.

  We walked through the bowling alley. I looked over the top of my sunglasses. No suspicious auras.

  Outside, heat waves shimmered over the empty cars in the parking lot. The intense California sun warmed me uncomfortably, and I retreated back into the shadow of the front awning.

  The situation felt wrong. I walked around the bowling alley to the back.

  A pair of pink human feet jutted over the rim of the Dumpster, toes up.

  My kundalini noir twisted in distress. I didn't need to think too hard about whose feet they belonged to. I crept close-Coyote watching my back-and grasped the top of the metal Dumpster. I levitated and looked inside, hoping that I was mistaken.

  The woman wore olive green capri pants and a yellow top. Her head rested against a pizza box, as if it were a pillow. A scarf in a flame motif covered her neck. Her eyes stared blankly at the sky. One blue flip-flop sat where it had been flung atop a plastic garbage bag. The other flip-flop had fallen into a big empty can of tomato sauce. A battered saxophone case was jammed into one corner of the Dumpster.

  I touched her left leg. It was still warm.

  I took off my sunglasses. The body emitted no aura. Rebecca Dwelling was dead.

  Chapter Ten

  Coyote walked to the Dumpster. He levitated to stand on the rim by Rebecca's feet and stared at her. He turned his ball cap backward, bent forward, and grasped her ankles. "Watcha." Look.

  He lifted her body. A dozen flies took to the air and buzzed around us. "There are no wounds. No blood."

  Coyote shook the body. Her ponytail and hands brushed across the garbage. "See how her head wobbles? Whoever attacked Rebecca twisted her neck like a bottle cap."

  Even though she was dead, the way she dangled looked humiliating. "Do you have to do that?"

  "Why?" Coyote answered. "If she starts complaining, that would be a good thing, no?"

  Coyote let go of her ankles. Rebecca's head settled into a pile of juice cartons. Her legs doubled over so that she rested butt up in a perverse yogalike posture. Flies landed on the insoles of her feet. I wanted the toes to twitch, but of course, they didn't.

  Rebecca's neck had been broken. I reached down and lifted her hand. I didn't see any hair, skin, or blood under the fingernails. There were no marks of a struggle on her or the surrounding ground. Which meant she was attacked with such surprise she didn't have a chance to defend herself.

  She hadn't been dragged out here. Inside the Majestic Lanes, there had been no commotion. Rebecca must have known and trusted her vampire attacker.

  My gaze returned to Rebecca's trim body and the still rosy skin. What a pity. Had I been more alert and less careless, I could've prevented her death. Here she was in her youthful prime, cut down to feed maggots.

  Rebecca had been casually tossed into the Dumpster, which meant her killer wasn't worried about the police finding a corpse behind the Majestic Lanes. Maybe this happened often. After all, we were in L. A.

  We were alone, but I figured not for long. To reassure myself, I touched the Colt pistol hidden under my shirt. "It's best that we leave." I didn't want to risk gunplay, not until I learned more.

  Coyote turned his cap around. "I'm still hungry. Those nachos weren't much."

  "After seeing Rebecca like that, you wanna eat?"

  "Vato, no matter what happens, the world keeps spinning and your appetite returns."

  I cou
ldn't argue. We headed back to my car.

  Coyote recommended a dive in Watts. Since I was the only one with money, I paid for the meal. We ate outside under a tattered picnic umbrella. Coyote had five beef and red chile tamales to my two. We smothered the tamales with blood from a bag I had stashed in my car.

  I sipped a Carta Blanca.

  Why was Rebecca killed? And why now? I assumed it was to keep her from talking to me.

  The next question: what did she know?

  I asked Coyote, "Why did you tell Rebecca about me?"

  Coyote pushed a hunk of tamale through the blood on his plate. "Because, carnal, she was friends with Katz Meow. I knew Katz was looking for someone to solve Roxy's murder."

  "How did you know that?"

  "Vato, I listen to chisme, rumors. Roxy's death was suspiciously convenient for a lot of rich people."

  "Like Cragnow?"

  "Especially ese culo vampiro." That vampire asshole.

  "Did you know Roxy?"

  "We never met."

  "How did you know about Rebecca being friends with Katz?" I asked.

  "I followed Katz around. She and Rebecca hung out together. I eavesdropped on them."

  "They didn't notice?"

  "No, but I was right there in plain sight." Coyote extended his index fingers, as if they were antennae sprouting from his forehead. "Como una mosca." Like a fly.

  "Katz needed help," he continued. "I recognized Rebecca from the Majestic Lanes. That's where I told her how Katz could find her champion."

  "Champion? Me?"

  Coyote licked a dollop of blood clinging, like sauce, to his mustache. He grinned. "Simon. Who else?"

  "Rebecca was murdered just before I had a chance to question her. Who knew I was here? Katz. Cragnow and his goons. Lucky Rosario." The next name was difficult for me to say but I had to. "You, Coyote."