Ghostly Manners

by K E O'Connor

  “You must be his new assistant,” said the man inside the car.

  “That’s right. I’m Lorna Shadow.” I gave him a questioning look, expecting him to introduce himself.

  “You need one of these to get the gates open.” He waved a plastic card in front of me.

  “Well, since I haven’t officially started my job yet, I haven’t been given one of those magic cards. Any chance I can use yours?” The man’s smug face was beginning to annoy me.

  He tipped the cap back on his head, revealing a set of bushy eyebrows and dark, narrow set eyes. “Only if you promise not to run away with it.”

  I grabbed the card from his hand. “Why would I want to run away? This is where I now live.”

  “It might not be for long,” said the man.

  “Meaning what?”

  “Meaning you’ve yet to meet the family,” he said. “They’re an acquired taste.”

  “Lord Galbraith sounded okay on the phone,” I said.

  “He’s not the problem. Wait until you meet his wife. She’s a real piece of work.”

  I frowned before walking away. I’d make my own assumptions about the family after I’d met them and not be influenced by this hard faced misery.

  After a quick search under some of the ivy covering the walls, I located a swipe box and inserted the card into it. A few seconds later, the gates inched open. I hurried back to the sedan, shoved the card back in the window, and jumped into my own car.

  “Who was that?” Helen craned her neck to look back at the car following us as we continued our journey towards the manor house.

  “Looks like the chauffeur to me,” I said. “Not the friendliest person I’ve ever met. Told me to watch out for the family.”

  “I wonder why,” said Helen. “What do we have to be careful of?”

  “Something about the wife not being friendly,” I said. “But he didn’t give off a trustworthy vibe. I won’t be paying much attention to what he has to say.”

  “Oh, wow! Look at that,” said Helen.

  I glanced in the direction she was pointing as we turned the corner of the gravel drive. The manor house sat in front of us, a large bubbling fountain in the center of the driveway. I could see there had been several extensions to the original manor house, two short squat wings on either side, followed by further additions of a grander scale. The building was a vast, sprawling sandstone colored affair, with double columns under a stone archway over the top of the entrance.

  The sedan behind me beeped loudly, and I realised I’d stopped the car to stare. I pressed down on the gas pedal and parked outside the front of the house. The rude chauffer may have seen the building many times, but I always liked to take a good look at my new home.

  “This isn’t too shabby.” Helen exited the back of the car, accompanied by Flipper. “I could get used to this. I wonder which wing is ours?”

  “I don’t know where they’re putting us up yet. We might be in the stables. I didn’t get any details on our accommodation in the rush to get here. Hope it’s not too awful.” Sometimes these old houses were nothing more than crumbling ruins, damp, with dire heating. But, so far, this one looked in good condition, with clean windows, neat borders, and tidy brickwork.

  “It had better not be in the stables,” muttered Helen.

  “I think they have enough wings to accommodate us.” I glanced along the building. “From what I could gather on the phone, it’s only Lord and Lady Galbraith who live here and a few members of staff.”

  “You’re wrong about that,” said the chauffeur, opening his car door.

  “Who else lives here then?” I asked him, feeling resentful at him listening into our conversation.

  “Well, I do for one,” he said smugly.

  “And you are?” Helen’s blue eyes narrowed.

  He tipped his cap to her. “Karl Jenkins at your service, ma’am. I’ve been chauffeur and right-hand man to Lord and Lady Galbraith for five years, coming on six, actually. I can tell you everything there is to know of value about this place and, probably, some of the things they don’t want you to know as well.”

  “Jack of all trades by the sound of it.” Helen looked unimpressed.

  Karl frowned at her. “You must be the new washerwoman.”

  “Laundress and seamstress if you must know.” Helen's eyes narrowed even more.

  “Same thing,” said Karl with a shrug. “Don’t leave your car out front. Staff vehicles have to be around the back, out of the way, so we don’t bring the tone down. And don’t make a habit of going through the front entrance either. We go in around the side or through the back door where the staff kitchen is.”

  “Yes m’lord,” spat out Helen as Karl sauntered away.

  “Let’s hope the rest of the staff are nicer than him,” I said. “Come on, let’s investigate our new home.” I hooked my arm through Helen’s elbow, and we walked to the front door, Flipper by my side. I rapped on the varnished red wooden door with its brass knocker in the shape of a fist, before straightening my knee length black skirt and smoothing my bob. Needed to make a good first impression with our new employer.

  A few seconds later, I heard footsteps approach the door, and it was pulled open by a smartly dressed older man with a shock of greying hair, a blue and white spotted cravat tucked into the top of an open necked white shirt.

  “Miss Shadow and Miss Holliday, I presume,” he said. “I’m Lord Galbraith.”

  “That’s right,” I said.

  “Or are you married?” Confusion crossed his lightly wrinkled face. “I believe that’s allowed, isn’t it? I didn’t think to ask if you shared a surname.”

  I disentangled my arm from Helen’s elbow and shook Lord Galbraith’s outstretched hand. “We aren’t married or even a couple. Helen and I work together; we’re business partners.”

  “Oh, well, jolly good.” He shook my hand hard and then Helen’s. “Be sure you are welcome here, regardless of your relationship. I thought it was extremely modern of me to employ you, actually. Two young ladies together, what fun,” he chuckled to himself. “But I get ahead of myself. I am Lord Sylvester Galbraith the Fifth. Welcome to your new home.” He stood to one side and gestured for us to enter.

  I glanced at Helen and grinned at her. Good old Sylvester had made the classic mistake of thinking Helen and I were a couple. It wasn’t uncommon for husbands and wives to take on these kinds of jobs together, and it was often assumed when I mentioned my partner to potential employers that Helen and I were an item. But I didn’t sense any malice in Lord Galbraith’s gaff, just a rather out of date understanding of how the world worked these days.

  “You have a lovely home, Lord Galbraith.” Helen followed me through the main door.

  “Thank you, my dear,” said Lord Galbraith. “It has been in the family for many years. My great-grandfather bought it from a Lord who was going bankrupt and needed to liquidate his assets. According to the records, the place was falling down. My great-grandfather spent years having it renovated. Let me give you the penny tour, and you can see the old place in all its glory.”

  “That would be nice.” A shiver of pleasure ran down my spine. I loved nothing more than poking about in an old house and exploring the nooks and crannies that had been created over the years by former owners, intent on putting their unique stamp on their home.

  “Your companion dog is house-trained I presume.” Lord Galbraith looked down at Flipper, who stood patiently by my side.

  “Yes, this is Flipper. He is well-behaved.”

  “I like dogs, and this one looks like a fine fellow. I'm sure he won't cause any trouble.” Lord Galbraith led us through a dark wood paneled hallway, most of the walls covered in oil paintings of woodland, the scent of lemon oil in the air. “We travel a lot, so it’s not easy to keep a dog anymore. It will be nice to have an animal in the house again.” He gave Flipper’s head a brief pat.

  We walked into what looked like a front parlor, with a large stone fireplace as the
main feature, a muted beige carpet, antique cream colored walls, and two enormous floral patterned sofas. There were three display cabinets showing various china and crystal trinkets.

  “My wife likes to read in this room. You will often find her in here in front of the fire when it gets cold.” Lord Galbraith shook his head. “Always has her nose in a book. Don’t understand it myself, when we have so much glorious countryside right on our doorstep.”

  He showed us into another parlor, the main dining room, with a table that could seat twenty, a games room, the kitchen and laundry, and then upstairs to the bedrooms and bathrooms.

  “As you can see, we have a lot of house to care for and often entertain guests,” said Lord Galbraith. “It can get lively around here at times.”

  “Is it just you and Lady Galbraith in residence?” I asked as we reached the top of the final flight of stairs, the stairwell decked out in muted reds and cream colors.

  “My cousin lives with us most of the time,” said Lord Galbraith. “Douglas can usually be found in the games room when he’s awake. He is something of a night owl, so you may not see much of him. My old friend from Eton, Cecil, often stays with us as well. He is the local doctor for the village. Cecil lost his sister recently. Terrible business, they were close. I feel for the old boy, so let him stay in one of the guest rooms when he’s feeling down. I think it helps him not to be alone. Don’t like to think of him dwelling on his loss.”

  “And what about other staff members?” asked Helen. “We have already met your chauffeur.”

  “Yes, there’s Karl; he’s been with us for years. We also employ a cleaner, Gladys, and we have the gardener, Zach, who has been with us for almost a year. He's a terribly handy chap. Can turn his hand to anything if you ask him.”

  “Do you employ a cook?” A worried look crossed Helen’s face. She liked her meals large and often. It was one of the pleasures of living in a big house like this. They knew how to feed you.

  “No cook. We have our food prepared off site and brought to the house,” said Lord Galbraith. “My wife thinks it’s easier than bothering with all that noise and fuss in the kitchen, especially after our recent mess. We have someone on retainer we use for big events. But there is plenty of food in the kitchen, and the cupboards are well-stocked. You won’t need to worry about going hungry.”

  I exchanged a glance with Helen. What mess could he be referring to? The cook must have done something terrible to the family if it put them off having another.

  Lord Galbraith stopped outside a closed door. “This will be your room.” He pushed open the door, and we walked through. The room was vast with high ceilings, ornate cornicing, and large windows looking out over the front gardens of the house. An empty fireplace adorned one wall, sandwiched between two dark wood wardrobes. An enormous four poster bed took up the majority of the room.

  “This is lovely.” Helen did a quick circuit of the bedroom.

  “I would be happy to provide you with separate living quarters since you aren’t an actual couple.” Lord Galbraith gave me a wink. “We have ample spare rooms if you do not need to share a bed.”

  “That would be appreciated,” I said. “Helen does snore rather loudly.”

  She shot me a glare. “I do not. A lady never snores.”

  Lord Galbraith chuckled. “You may have the room next door to this one, Miss Holliday. And you may both be as noisy as you wish. Karl has his own room close to the garage, and the gardener has a detached annex away from the main house. Gladys lives off site, so you have this entire floor to yourselves. The family sleeps on the floor below. That area is not to be accessed by staff, unless we request your presence in one of our rooms.”

  “Thank you; that’s generous of you,” I said. “We don’t usually make much noise. We won’t be disturbing you.”

  “Now you have seen the house, I will leave you to settle in,” said Lord Galbraith. “If you would do me the great honor of dining with us tonight, I would appreciate it. Normally, staff do not dine at the main table, but since it is your first day here, I thought it would be nice for us to get better acquainted. I can also outline your work duties in more detail. We dine at seven in the main hall.”

  “We will look forward to that,” I said to Lord Galbraith.

  “Excellent. Take your time unpacking, I don't expect you to start work straight away. Plenty of time for that tomorrow.” Lord Galbraith backed out of the room and shut the door.

  “Dinner at the posh table,” said Helen with a smile. “We are honored.”

  “But just remember, it’s for one night only,” I said. “The rest of the time, we have to eat cold scraps in the kitchen on our own.”

  “Yes, what’s that all about, not having their own cook?” said Helen. “Who is going to provide me with all the sweet treats I need to keep me going during the day while I’m slaving over the laundry?”

  “We’ll have to check out the kitchen, make sure there is actually food in there,” I said. “You know what these posh lots can be like; they think cheese, crackers, and port is a decent meal.”

  Helen grimaced. “My figure will not survive on such meagre rations. Come on, let’s explore, and the first stop will be the kitchen cupboards.”

  Chapter 3

  We went back downstairs to the car, unloaded our bags, and I parked the car out of the eye line of the household, so as not to bring down the neighborhood.

  Once our bags were unpacked and both rooms explored, we checked out the rest of the bedrooms on our floor, all empty and unused as Lord Galbraith had informed us. And although they were empty, they were all clean and in good repair.

  The rooms below us were out of bounds, family members only, so we skipped those and headed to the ground floor.

  “Here’s the library,” said Helen. “Lord Galbraith didn’t show us this room when he gave as his tour.” She pushed open a dark wooden door and peered around it.

  As you would expect of a library, the walls were stacked full of books. A large mahogany writing desk sat in front of the bay window. Flipper walked around the room a few times, snuffling the ground, no doubt looking for any discarded bits of food that had been missed.

  “Perhaps we could make this our room if nobody else uses it,” I said. We always liked to pick a room we could have as our own, where we wouldn’t disturb family members.

  “Maybe Lady Galbraith won’t let us,” said Helen. “If she’s a big reader, this could be one of her favorite rooms, too.”

  I paused from my inspection of the books, a cold shudder running down my spine. Flipper looked over at me and whined before hurrying to my side and sitting at my feet, his blue gaze focused on me.

  “Something wrong?” asked Helen. “You’ve gone a little pale.”

  I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, getting a faint hint of rosewater on the air currents. Maybe it was nothing. Flipper whined again and pawed at the ground.

  “Is Flipper sensing something?” Helen knew all about Flipper’s ability to detect ghosts.

  “He’s not the only one.” I opened my eyes, the cold shudder taking over my whole body. I forced myself to relax. “I don’t think we’re alone.”

  “These old houses do tend to hang onto their spirits.” Helen’s gaze went around the room. “Do we have a ghost as a resident?”

  “It feels like it to me,” I said. “But all I’m getting are the chills, nothing more.”

  “Good chills or bad chills?”

  “Just chills,” I said. “Although it feels as if the warmth has been leached out of my bones.”

  “Do you sense any trouble from the ghost?”

  “No. Whoever it is, they don’t feel strong. It might be a residual energy of someone who died here.” The ghosts I met had varying degrees of abilities and energy. If a ghost had been living on their own with no humans around them and no electrical objects to feed from, they could literally be wisps of smoke in the air. I could pass them by and barely detect them, other than perhaps the occasion
al shiver or feeling I was being watched. Others were more powerful, particularly those who lived among humans. The ghosts fed from their energy and grew in strength, gaining the ability to move objects, change the temperature of a room, and even make noises.

  The only thing I’d never been able to do was get a ghost to talk to me. It could be frustrating; we had to communicate through sounds, noise, and sometimes comical mimes and dances. The ghosts seemed to hear me just fine, so I never had to do a silly dance or mime to communicate with them.

  Flipper whined once more and let out a small bark as he leaned his weight against my leg.

  “It’s okay, boy. I don’t think this one means us any harm.” The ghosts I met usually wanted something, which was the reason they were still around. Sometimes it was simply to have a message passed to a loved one or complete some unfinished business. I’d even met a few ghosts who’d asked me to let people know where their last will and testament was. They'd hidden it so well, their family members hadn't been able to find it.

  “Let’s keep exploring the house,” said Helen. “You never know, the ghost might decide to show itself to us at some point.”

  “We could always just avoid this room. Maybe the ghost is trapped in here and can’t get out. I’d rather not have another job where I’m communicating with thin air.” And that was the problem. Flipper and I were the only ones who could detect ghosts. And in previous jobs, I’d been discovered talking to the wall by employers. I was almost dismissed from one role because they thought I’d lost my mind. It’s never easy telling people you can communicate with the dead.

  “The poor ghost,” said Helen. “Maybe it’s after some company. Imagine what it must be like, nobody else can see you, you feel like you’re all alone, and then suddenly you appear. To the ghosts, you must seem like a guardian angel.”

  “I just want to be a personal assistant, not a guardian angel,” I said. “Won’t that do for this job?”

  Helen laughed and took hold of my arm. “No more speaking to the dead, for now. But I know you won't be able to resist for long. Let’s see what else this house has to offer.”