At some point, I must have dozed off. A different officer slammed the door to wake me. Wiping the drool from my face, I jumped to my feet. “I need to make a phone call.”
“You’ll see the judge now.”
“But I haven’t spoken to my lawyer yet or made a phone call. Don’t I get to do that first?”
Again, I was ignored. Instead, I was handcuffed to a dozen other people and we were led in a straight line down a series of long hallways. Eventually, we came to a door, and we were ushered in. Once inside, I realized the bars on the other side of the room looked out to an empty courtroom. I felt like an animal in a cage about to go on trial for a crime I barely even committed.
A few minutes later, two uniformed officers unlocked the back doors of the courtroom, and people started to fill the galley. I held onto the bars, frantically searching through the people entering. Carter! Thank God.
“Carter!” I raised my hand to wave, yanking up the arm of the person next to me I was still cuffed to, without warning.
He tried to come to me, but one of the guards stopped him from getting that close. “Don’t say anything. I got you a lawyer. She’ll take care of everything.”
I nodded, feeling the first sense of relief since this nightmare had started. Tears started to stream down my face, but I couldn’t even wipe them away without bothering the person next to me. So I just let them fall.
A little while later, court was called into session. A judge wearing an ankle-length, traditional, white Kandura robe with a red and white-checkered headdress draped over his head, took the bench. He spoke fast and furious in Arabic and rarely looked up.
So much was going on at once. The judge would be speaking to one person while two or three others were having side conversations in difference languages—some of which I wasn’t even sure what language they were speaking. I just kept looking back and forth between the front of the courtroom and Carter sitting in the back. It was the first time I saw Carter look anything other than his calm, laid back, confident self. That alone scared the shit out of me.
Eventually, an officer called my name. He uncuffed me from the chain of prisoners and led me into the hallway where a woman wearing a suit was waiting for me. She spoke perfect English, but with a thick Arabic accent. She was also stunningly beautiful.
“When the judge calls your name, I will speak for you. We’re going to plead not guilty. The arresting officer will not show up to give his testimony, and this will upset the judge.”
“What? How do you know the arresting officer will not show up and why do we want to upset the judge?”
She sighed as if I was annoying her. “Because the officer was told not to appear today. And this judge is a stickler for hearing testimony at the initial arraignment. There’s a fifty-fifty chance that it will annoy him so much that he’ll release you to prove a point.”
“What happens if things go in the other direction? What happens if the other fifty percent chance wins out?”
“Then you go to jail for a maximum of thirty days until such time the officer can be located and appear.”
“But…” Before I could object, an officer called my name.
“It’s our turn. Let’s go.”
“Wait…”
“No. We go in now.”
Everything that came next played out before me as if I was watching it from a distance. I was physically present in the courtroom, but my mind was floating somewhere above watching it all play out. I glanced back at Carter before standing next to my lawyer in the front of the court. He was sitting on the edge of his seat and looked as nervous as I felt.
The judge said a few things I didn’t understand, and then my lawyer responded in Arabic. I held my breath watching the judge as he grew angrier and angrier with each stream of words he barked. After a heated debate, the judge picked up his gavel and slammed it down angrily. I jumped from the sound.
“Come with me.” An officer took my elbow and began to lead me out of the courtroom.
“Wait. Wait…What happened?” I asked my lawyer. “What did the judge say?”
She rolled her eyes. “You’re free to go. The officer will take you to collect your belongings now.”
CARTER WAS WAITING ON the front steps of the courthouse with my lawyer. My initial reaction was to run and throw my arms around him. But then I remembered that was how I got in trouble in the first place—being indecent in public.
“You okay?” His face was so full of concern.
“I think so.”
He turned to my lawyer. “I don’t know how to thank you, Serine.”
A sly grin crossed her face, and she nodded. “I’m sure you’ll think of something the next time our paths cross on a flight to America, Captain.” She turned to me. “Good luck with your sister. Try to keep her decent from now on.”
I stood with my mouth hanging open as she walked away. “Your sister?”
Carter attempted to explain. “We met a few times on flights. I thought the chances she would help me were better if…”
I put my hand up and stopped him. “I don’t even want to know.”
“I’m so sorry, Kendall. I should never have left you out there by yourself. I should have made you come with me, and this would never have happened.”
“It’s not your fault.”
He tipped his chin toward the parking lot across the street. “I rented a car. Can we get out of here please?”
“God, yes. I need to take a shower so badly and get out of these clothes.”
“Good. I already have your bags. I got housekeeping to open your room. Pretended I lost my key.”
“My bags? Where are we going?”
“Where I should have taken you the first night.”
I’D REALLY FUCKED everything up.
Under no circumstances should I have left Kendall alone. Even though she kept trying to convince me the arrest wasn’t my fault, I couldn’t help but feel responsible for the whole ordeal.
She was unusually quiet the entire ride to Amari’s. My friend secured us one of the bedrooms in his rooming house for the next couple of days. Amari’s place was located in the heart of the desert, away from the commotion of the city. Thankfully, Amari wasn’t conservative. As long as we were discreet, pretending to be married so the other guests weren’t tipped off, he was completely fine with Kendall and me sharing a room. He could be trusted not to rat us out.
We’d just arrived to our room when I noticed Kendall staring pensively out of the window at the sandy desert.
“Are you okay?”
“I just need a shower,” she answered without turning to me.
Her tone alarmed me. I needed to fix this. All I wanted was to undo the damage done by the arrest.
“Let me run you a bath.”
Despite the fact that she didn’t answer me, I proceeded to the bathroom to set up the tub until it was filled with water and soap. Still feeling anxious about her mindset, I returned to the bedroom and offered her my hand to lift her off the bed.
Leading her into the bathroom, I wanted nothing more than to hold her under the warm water.
“Take off your clothes,” I demanded. “But leave your bra and underwear on because we’re bathing together.”
Relieved that she didn’t protest, I took off my pants, keeping my boxer briefs on before immersing myself in the water. After she removed her dress, my cock swelled at the sight of her fit body in nothing but panties and a bra. I reached my hand out to her.
“Get in. I promise I won’t bite.”
She hesitantly dipped her legs in one by one then lowered her body in front of mine, situating herself between my knees. With her back pressed against my chest and her ass so close to my crotch, my hard-on couldn’t be helped. Hopefully, she understood.
Kendall had her hair tied back into a ponytail. Pulling at the hairband, I watched as her beautiful blonde mane came loose. Cupping some of the warm water in my hands, I repeatedly wet her hair then poured a dollop of shampoo
into my palm.
I began to slowly massage her scalp as she bent her head back. “Relax, baby,” I whispered. “Just relax.” I wanted nothing more than to take care of this girl right now, make her feel safe again.
It was quiet aside from the faint sound of men speaking Arabic in the adjacent room. After several minutes of near-silence, Kendall spoke for the first time.
“Am I a fool, Carter?”
I instinctively stopped the movement of my fingers through her hair to process her question. “What do you mean?”
“What am I doing here?”
My heart sank. Hearing that question was like a punch to the gut. “You regret following me?”
She sat up a bit and paused before speaking. “You’re a beautiful man…so charismatic…such a free spirit. And you make me feel things I’ve never felt before. But I think I got carried away. I just don’t understand how I’m going to get out of whatever this is unscathed.”
“Why are you worrying about things that haven’t happened? Why can’t it just be about the present?”
“I can think of many reasons why it can’t be.”
“Okay…what are they? Talk to me. Aside from the arrest, tell me why everything that happened before that point led you to suddenly believe that all of this is a colossal mistake.” The angry tone of my own voice surprised me. My body went rigid as I waited for her response.
“It’s not just about you. I’ve been selfish. You wanna know why all of this is fucked up? Because there are two men, who I’ve led on, waiting to meet me in five days, two men who are leaving it up to me to determine if they’re going to have a family or not. Because I’m supposed to be taking prenatal vitamins, not drinking. Because I haven’t decided at all whether I’m going through with any of it. Because I overheard Jolene on the plane telling the other flight attendant—who you also screwed over—what an asshole you are. Because my lawyer who got me off the hook is yet another one of your cheap lays. Because I feel like maybe I’m a fool for thinking I’m somehow different than all of them. Because maybe my getting arrested was a sign that sleeping with you would have been a colossal mistake. Because I still don’t know if I can trust you. I can really go on and on.”
That was hard to hear, and I honestly didn’t know what to say. I could understand her doubts about me, and no matter how strongly I felt about her, there wasn’t going to be an easy way to prove it to her.
After a long silence, I finally said, “I understand the situation you’re in, and you’re right to have those concerns about me.”
“There’s just so much at stake, and I could be sacrificing everything for a man who’s going to burn me. How am I different from them, Carter? Tell me. All the other women…how am I any different?”
I knew this was it. This was my only chance to answer that question in as honest a way as possible, or I was going to lose her.
I ran my wet hands through my hair and let out a deep breath. “I’m not proud of myself for the way I’ve lived my life thus far. Everything you’ve heard…it’s all true, Kendall, all of it. I’m not trying to hide anything from you. But nothing has been the same since the day we met. I don’t know how to exactly explain why this feels different. It’s still too new. The only thing I continue to be sure of is that I want more time to figure it out, more than I want anything.”
Her breathing became heavier, and I knew I needed to look her in the eyes.
“I need you to turn around and face me.”
When she finally did, I repositioned my legs around her, locking her in. “This is me, the real me. Not the pilot, not the playboy or any of the labels branded on me because of dumb decisions. I need you to know that the last thing I want is to hurt you. I will do everything in my power to avoid that. But you have to understand that I can’t change my fucked-up past.”
Her eyes started to well up. “It’s not just you. I’m so fucked up, too, Carter.
I wiped a tear that fell down her cheek with my thumb. “We’re both fucked up. Maybe that’s what it is. Maybe we see a little of ourselves in each other. We’re two wrongs that somehow make a right. Inseparable we’re miserable, but together…we somehow work. I know this isn’t a simple situation. I know you have decisions to make.”
“I’m scared.”
“Wanna know the truth? I’m scared for you, too. When you told me what was going on with you back in Rio, I really hadn’t let it sink in. I thought a lot about it on the flight over here, actually. That’s some scary shit. But I understand your dilemma. It’s a lot of freaking money—your family’s legacy. You feel a responsibility to uphold that, and you’re trying to do it in a way that would actually help people—these guys in Germany. But you’re not ready to make a decision, Kendall. I don’t want you to make a mistake you can never take back. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that you’re just not ready to commit to having a child. That’s not gonna change in five days, either. You need more time. You need to put off that trip to Germany at least until you’re sure.”
I need more time, too.
Just give me more time with you.
“If we continue this adventure, I can’t sleep with you, Carter. As much as I want to, I decided that wouldn’t be a good idea after all.”
“I get it. I’m not gonna lie and say that makes me happy or that it will be easy for me. But I understand it and respect it. And I promise not to pressure you, either.”
We stared into each other’s eyes until I leaned in and kissed her forehead and kept my lips pressed against it. I momentarily lost my senses and my composure when I spoke against her skin, “Don’t leave me yet, Perky.”
She pulled back to look at me, and when she suddenly smiled, it felt like she’d released my heart from a chokehold. “What’s on tap today then?” she asked.
Relief.
“Well…” I smiled. “We nap. Then when we wake up, we’ll have an early dinner of some of Amari’s shawarma, then some hookah.”
“Did you just call me a hooker?” She laughed.
My laughter roared throughout the bathroom. It felt so fucking good to let it out after the tension of a few minutes ago.
“No. Hookah. Also known as shisha. It’s a water pipe used to smoke flavored tobacco. They smoke it out back after supper. It’s a tradition here. You don’t have to do it if you don’t want to. But I promise, it’s the only pipe I’ll ask you to wrap your mouth around tonight.”
Kendall playfully pinched my cheeks. “There he is. I was starting to think you were going to make this no-sex thing easy for me by shutting your dirty mouth, too.”
“Oh, I said I’d respect your decision, but there’s no way that extends to my dirty mouth.”
“I love your dirty mouth, actually.”
“Someday, Perky. Someday…when you’re ready, you’ll realize just how dirty my mouth can be all over you. And you’ll love it.”
THE BATHTUB TALK WE’D HAD seemed to bring us closer together. That night, we sat outside in back of Amari’s property, which was basically the vast, dry desert, sharing not only a hookah pipe but also stories of our childhoods.
Kendall told me all about growing up on the ranch in Texas, and I let her in on some funny secrets, like how my sisters used to put makeup on me while I slept when we were kids.
Kendall was a joy to watch as she sat with her legs crossed, blowing smoke rings from the hookah pipe with that pretty little mouth as she laughed and opened up to me.
I had never wanted her more, but as much as I was aching for a taste of her, I vowed to keep my promise not to push physical boundaries while she was in this state of limbo.
Later that night, she’d fallen asleep with her ass pressed against my side. Between the quiet of the desert and my raging hard-on, I couldn’t sleep for shit.
Desperately needing relief, I quietly got up from the bed and retreated to the bathroom. With my back leaning against the door, I closed my eyes and thought back to our time at the club, but instead of us dancing, somehow my mind
had envisioned Kendall fully naked, wrapped around me as she rode my cock on the dance floor.
We were so close to Nirvana that night before I fucked up and left her alone on the street. Shaking the upsetting thought from my head, I tried to focus once again on my club fantasy.
Panting, I fisted my cock, pumping it hard as I imagined fucking her hot, wet pussy, remembering the way she smelled when our bodies were close, how much she wanted me that night, the way her tongue tasted when we kissed.
I jerked myself harder before suddenly stopping at the sound of her voice from behind the door.
“Carter? What are you doing?”
Shit.
I laughed under my breath and banged the back of my head against the wood. “Praying?”
“Do you always breathe like that when you’re praying?”
“It’s an intense prayer.”
“What are you really doing?”
“I think you might know what I’m really doing, Kendall.”
“Can I come in?”
Still fully erect, I tucked my cock back into my pants as best I could before opening the door.
Her eyes trailed down to my massive erection. “I’m sorry….to make you resort to that.”
“It’s okay. My hand and I haven’t spent time like this since I was a teenager. I think he missed me.”
“What were you thinking about?”
“You.”
“Yeah…but what specifically?”
“It was this fantasy of fucking you on the dance floor back at the club.”
She looked down at me again. Her expression was serious when she asked, “You need some help?”
Playboy Pilot Page 9