by Shan
“Because Tamarion kept coming in here asking if I needed his help. I know that he wasn’t asking to be nice. It’s not a secret that he don’t like. Little nigga always feel the need to remind me that I’m not his mama. And you need to get on his ass about that mouth of his.”
That little fucker was bad as hell. I had to take deep breaths and woosah around this bitch when dealing with him. I can’t count how many times he had called me a bitch, done told me how I would never be his mama, or even cracked jokes on how fat I had gotten since I been pregnant. I halfway wondered if his mama had him doing most of that shit.
”Come here,” I heard him say over the music.
“Chmmp.” I rolled my eyes and went directly back to packing. Fuck him. There he go trying to woo me back in. This was the second time that he had hit me over that bitch and I wasn't going to stick around and put up with that shit. He was lucky I didn't grab my .22 from my purse and dead his ass.
“Baby, come here.”
I shook my head no as more tears poured down my cheeks. I didn't understand this shit at all. My heart longed for this fool even though he had treated it with such little care. His intentions for me hadn't been good since day one, but I was still head over hills for this clown.
“You leaving me?”
“As if you give a fuck.” I tossed a couple more pairs of shoes into my bag and then stood to my feet. I walked over to Tamar's side of the bed and grabbed one of his already rolled blunts. He hated when I smoked while pregnant and I hated it too, but the doctor told me it was better for me to smoke a little here and there if I needed to instead of stressing. Stress wasn't good for me or my baby and Tamar damn sure knew how to stress a bitch out. I lit the tip of the blunt and jumped when I felt him touch me.
His soft lips grazed the back of my neck and began to lightly kiss on my shoulder. I shook my head and tapped my feet against the floor. I needed to move away from him, but my body was frozen in place.
“Mmmh,” I moaned when Tamar pinched my nipple through the thin spaghetti strap tee I was wearing. He grabbed the blunt out of my hand, placed it to my mouth, and allowed me to take a puff before he put it out. He turned me around to face him and then he grabbed both sides of my face with his hands.
”You leaving me?”
I didn't answer him and only ignored him like he had done me earlier. I wanted to tell him that I was leaving him, but I didn't even know about that now. I had wanted him to come and stop me, which is why I took my time packing. He had done what I wanted him to do. He was confirming that some of what we had was real and maybe even worth fighting for.
Tamar pulled my shirt over my head, and then pushed me back onto the bed. He climbed on top of me and slowly kissed my nipples taking his time with each one. I closed my eyes when he pulled my pants down and tossed them to the side. He started kissing and sucking all over my naked body. I wanted him to do the one thing to me that he refused to do. I didn’t know what was up with that. I had never come across a grown man that didn’t eat pussy. I’d asked him about it a few times, and he’d always shrugged it off without answering me. Getting head wasn’t everything nor would it be the end of the world if I didn’t get it, but damn I would love to feel Tamar’s lips covering my sweet mound.
Instead, I settled for the latter and sat back with pleasure written all over my face as Tamar slid that thick dick of his inside of me.
“Hmm baby,” I moaned as he stroked my slipping, wet pussy suddenly making me forget everything that I was mad about.
***
I lay in bed the following morning with my head tucked into Tamar’s chest while he puffed on a blunt. Although we ended the night on a good note, I wasn’t blind to the fact that Tamar kept jumping up in the middle of the night and going into his office. I used to believe that he was working, but now I knew that he was down there watching his wife. He tried to convince me that it was all for her protection, but I was far from stupid. I wasn’t about to let Tamar string me along until he got back into his wife’s good graces. Something had to give.
“So, where do we go from here?” I asked breaking the silence.
“What you talking about?” Tamar asked feigning dumbness. I rolled my eyes and sat up in bed to look at him. Pulling my hair over my shoulder, I crossed my legs in the Indian style position and sucked in a deep breath.
“Our relationship. Tamar, I’m not stupid. I know that you still want to be with her. I’m not about to play the side until you figure it all out. Either you want us here, or you don’t. I can take my ass back to Detroit and start my life over.”
“If that’s what you want to do then do it.”
“You know that’s not what I want to do.”
“Then why the fuck you complaining. Damn.”
Tamar sat up in bed and now had his back to me. He continued facing the blunt and seemingly was in deep thought. I hated to fuck up what could’ve potentially been a great day, but this was my fucking feelings that he was playing with. And not only that, in a matter of a months, our child would be here, and I didn’t want to bring my child into a hostile situation.
“I’m not complaining. I’m asking you what are you gonna do? Are we in a real relationship or am I just some side bitch that’s keeping you company until you work things out with Rozalyn? Does she even know that I’m pregnant with your child?”
Tamar glanced over his shoulder with a scowl covering his face. He didn’t even have to answer me. His facial expression told me everything I needed to know. She had no idea that I was carrying her husband’s baby and that let alone told me that it was something he hoped that she wouldn’t find out.
I shook my head and climbed out of bed. Most of my things were already packed, and I decided that the best thing for me to do was to pack the rest and just get the fuck outta here. I didn’t need this shit.
“Obviously, you’re not some side bitch if you’re carrying my damn seed. I just got a lot of shit going on right now, and I don’t need you trying to complicate shit even more. I don’t know what the fuck I wanna do, but it ain’t like I ain’t never told you before, Keysha. Yes, I still do love Rozalyn and honestly, I wanna be with her. Fix my family and shit like that. But at the same time, I don’t wanna lose you.”
“It don’t work like that, Tamar. You don’t get to have us both. She might be okay with sitting at home while you play house with another woman, but I’m not okay with that and I told you that from day one.”
“What the fuck ever! I’m getting sick of you and this Queen shit you be on. You walking around here like you too good for shit and it’s a fucking turn off. I’m not making you stay here. I ain’t make you no damn promises, and you been knowing for a good while that I was still torn over whether or not I wanted to be with my wife. You chose to stay and chose to trap me with that damn baby. You could’ve walked out last night and I wouldn’t have tried to stop you!”
“What the fuck you mean trap you? You tryna say I got pregnant on purpose?”
“That’s exactly what the fuck I’m saying. What happened to that depo-shit you said you were on? If I had known you weren’t on any birth control like you claimed, I would’ve never ran up in you raw. I damn sure wouldn’t have blessed your ass with my seeds. Man this the second fuckin’ baby I’m having on my wife and this shit got me hot as a muthafucka’!”
“Wow, I can’t believe you right now.”
“Believe it ma’. I wouldn’t lie to you.”
“If you felt that way, then why the fuck did you beg me to stay last night?”
“Beg you? When did I beg you? I asked you if you were leaving not that I really cared. I wanted some pussy. To keep real one-hun-dun with you like I always do, I wanted to make love to my wife, but since she wanna be in her damn feelings, I came and fucked you. Don’t worry, it won’t happen again.”
I stood there with my mouth wide open as Tamar walked out of the room. I had no idea what to think or even what to feel at that moment. All I know is I felt nothing but anger
and hurt. I didn’t get pregnant on purpose. How could he even say that shit to me? And that he wanted to fuck his wife, but fucked me instead? Is that why he’d sexed me with so much intensity and passion that he had me believing everything that I knew wasn’t true?
Shit, I gotta get away from this nigga.
9: Starr
2 weeks later…
I rubbed my hands over Neek’s high yellow skin and stared into his hazel brown eyes. I got on the tips of my toes, placed my hands over his chiseled chest and kissed his lips. I was happy that he decided to come home, but he was starting to smother me. He didn’t have to work today and for some reason he thought that I was just going to call all my clients and cancel on them.
There were several days that I had been off this week, but because he had been in his feelings it prevented us from spending time together. That wasn’t my fault it was his.
“Sorry baby, I gotta go,” I told him as I got ready to head out the bedroom.
“For real? You can’t chill out and spend time with your man for the day. I brought you some flowers. And was hoping we could go out to eat, or something.”
“Neek, you know I can’t just cancel my schedule like that. I’ll be home early though and we can just chill around the house.”
“Come here,” Neek pulled on my arm and tried to lay me back on the bed, but I resisted. “Come on, Starr, it’s been a couple weeks now.”
“I can’t because I gotta go.”
“What’s going on with you?”
“Nothing,” I said diverting my stare to the corner of the room.
“You still love me right? You know I’m out here trying to get this money together for us. You know that right?”
“I know and I appreciate you for doing that.”
“We should be able to get that spot you been checking out in a few months and I’ll give you some money to go and look for you a new ride at the end of the week.”
“Okay. Thanks baby. I gotta go.” I pulled away from him and left out our bedroom and out of the house. I got inside of my car and looked at the text message I had received few minutes earlier. I sighed and then shook my head at another message that had rolled through from Neek.
Neek: See you avoided my question. And you wonder why I left. It’s cool though. Check you later.
I tossed my phone in my seat and went on about my business. Neek was really acting like a little bitch and my feathers were overly ruffled with him. One minute he was happy at home and the next he wasn’t and wanted to blame me for it. I sped out of the driveway and went on about my business. He couldn’t have it his way all the time. He knew I wasn’t one to kiss his ass.
***
“I want you to get up here and ride my face so I can taste that fat pussy,” he told me and instantly my panties became wet. I sat back in my seat, spread my legs as far apart as they would go and took a long, huge toke off the kush laced blunt. I slowly blew the smoke in the air as I watched him stroke that long black dick of his. Taking my free hand, I used my finger to pull my panties to the side and toyed with my wet kitty.
“Yea, you like teasing a nigga. Come on and let me give that pussy what it's been missing.”
“You would know what she's been missing, huh? And I see you think you got all the answers,” I said as I took another toke before taking my finger that I pulled out my wet mound and placed it to my lips to lick my juices off. “Damn, well I do taste good. I can see why you want to this chocolate in your mouth.”
“Hell yea, now bring that fat ass over here before I come over there. Trust me if I gotta come over there, I'mma punish that pussy for real for real. No tapping out. Fuck with me.”
I smirked and took one last puff off the weed. I dropped the blunt down in the ashtray and stood to my feet. I was dressed in a cream colored Victoria's Secret bra and panty set with a pair of black ankle socks on my feet. Don't judge me. I was still the same thorough ass chick from the hood. I still had my tomboyish ways, but with each year that passed, I was finding more and more styles that matched my fly, but made me look more womanly in the process.
Neek, my husband didn't mind it one bit and--this fine ass nigga here didn't either. I walked over to him, stepped up on the sofa, pulled my panties to the side, and sat my fat pussy over his eagerly waiting mouth.
“Hmm baby,” I cooed. I gripped my hands on the back of the sofa and crooned in pure ecstasy. Dro was sucking on my clit like he was trying to pull my soul out of me.
Dro was my nigga on the side and he knew that was as far as it went. When we first met, I steered away from his advances even though it was hard. Dro was my Idris Elba back in his days on The Wire. He was straight up gangsta with his shit and had that guap that made a bitch’s pussy wet just from the sight of it. He was the type of nigga that I would straight be a Bonnie for, but unfortunately I was married and he knew that, but it didn’t stop him from coming at me.
He came at me so strong and hard for months that I could no longer resist, especially not after he sent me a picture of the biggest black dick I had seen in all of my twenty-six years of living and the muthafucka’ had the nerve to have curve. After that it was game time. I hopped on the dick any time I wasn’t on my husband’s dick, and I was hardly ever my husband’s dick anymore. Call me a hoe if you wanted, but this man gave head like he had been educated in this shit and swung that dick like a fuckin’ porn star. I was hooked.
He wanted more from me, wanted me to leave Neek, and be with him, but I wasn’t gonna be able to do that. No matter how many times I’d told him no, it didn’t seem to keep him from bringing the subject up at least once a week. I guess he was holding on to hope and hoping that one day when he asked that I would change my mind, but I wasn’t. Thank God he wasn’t one of those silly niggas that jumped stupid when they couldn’t get their way; like tryna go back and tell my husband what was going on thinking it was gonna get him a win in the end. He knew if he wanted to keep getting this good pussy then he had better keep his mouth closed.
Yea, so I lied. I was cheating on Neek. While he thought I was headed to the beauty shop to start my day, I was actually on my way here for this little pit stop so that my day could start off right. I couldn’t give Neek any pussy this morning knowing I was about to come here. Besides, that nigga had plenty of opportunities to get it when I was calling his ass to come back home, but since he wanted to be an asshole and act childish, it was Dro’s time.
“Ahh fuck!” I yelled, coming back to this good head I was getting. My hips were vibrating and my legs were trembling in sync with Dro's tongue as he licked me into submission. He braced his hands over my breast and held me in place knowing he was about to send me over the top.
I sucked in a deep breath and rode this nigga's face with no mercy. My clit pulsated with a purpose. My juices squirted out of me quickly and a scream escaped my lips as Dro continued to suck the life out of my pussy.
”Oh, shit nigga!” I screamed as I creamed all over his juicy lips. I looked down into his eyes as he stared up at me. I wanted to escape, to tap out, to get away from his ass but he was determined to make me cum and keep cumming for him. I could feel a tear slide down my face as I rode Dro through another wave of this good loving he was putting on me. I arched my back and dropped my head. My heart sunk into the bottom of my stomach and as black as I was, I know all the color left my face.
I didn't even have time to react before I was lifted in the air and tossed to the floor like a rag doll. My legs were so weak from Dro eating me relentlessly that I couldn't get to my feet in time enough. I watched as my husband Neek pounded his fist into Dro's face over and over again.
Neither of us saw it coming and had no time to react. How the fuck did he know I was here? How the fuck did he get in here? I climbed up and ran over to Neek. I had never seen him so angry before. He was putting them hands on Dro something serious, and I had to stop him before he killed the nigga.
”Neek, Neek, baby stop it! You're gonna kill him!” I screamed but
it was of no use. Blood flew each and every way as Neek beat Dro beyond the capacity of recognition. I grabbed at Neek's arm and he ended up bowing me in the mouth and splitting my lip. Instantly, blood spilled from my mouth and my ass was seeing stars from the impact. I shook it off and attempted to get at Neek again.
We were at a five star hotel and these muthafuckas had the place lit up with cameras. If Neek killed Dro there was no way he would get out of this shit. I couldn't allow that to happen. My hoe ass was out here doing the damn fool. I had a loving husband at home, but I was out here clowning on another nigga's dick.
It is what it is though. Neek just wasn't doing it for me anymore. Dro was everything to me that Neek used to be. Back when me and Neek got involved, it was on some shady shit. We were fucking around behind his cousin Quad's back and had set him up to go down for a bunch of shit that ended up getting him life in prison. After being there a couple of years, he committed suicide and that was the only reason I felt good enough to return to the states after Neek's tour in the armed forces.
I had felt good about the decision we'd made to set Quad up when it first happened, but it wasn't long before the guilt had hit me like a ton of bricks. True he deserved everything he had coming his way. He played the game well and had did a bunch of shady shit to people including me and Neek, but it wasn't up to us to determine what his fate should've been. We should've allowed karma to get his ass, but instead we stepped in the way. For that, I knew that some shit was gonna come back at me tenfold and I wasn't wrong; look at the shit that was happening to me now.
“Neek, oh my God! I think you killed him!” I screamed as I surveyed the damages that Neek had caused Dro. Neek was huffing and puffing like he'd just ran a marathon. His eyes were fucking slits and by the way he was looking at me, I just knew he was about to kill me. For a few moments, we stared each other down while he came towards me. I backed away from him, tears rolling down my face. I loved Neek. It wasn't that I didn't, it was just that our spark was gone. I should've been woman enough to admit that to him but now it was too late. My slick ass had gotten busted. He'd caught me red handed, in the act at that. I was so fucking embarrassed and so hurt that I hurt my husband. Fuck; I thought just as Neek slammed his hand so hard across my face it caused me to spin around before I fell to the floor.