by Shan
I squeezed a huge amount of Bath and Body Works Japanese Cherry Blossom onto the towel and scrubbed every inch of my body. Jaheim’s scent was all over me and I wanted to make sure that all evidence of him was gone just in case Tamar did decide to drop the kids off. Shit was sad that I had to go through so much in order to keep that nigga from killing somebody when he was out there doing him and starting a whole family with another bitch, and out in the open at that.
I stayed in the shower for about twenty minutes before getting out and drying my body off. Once I stepped into my room, I pulled the towel closer to my body and shivered from the cool air that hit my skin. Suddenly, a set of arms wrapped around my waist and roughly pulled me into their body. A smile almost crossed my face thinking that it was Jaheim coming back for more, but once their hand went over my nose and mouth, I knew something wasn’t right.
I went to let out a scream, but was too woozy to get anything out. My body went limp and the last thing I remember was no longer being able to feel my legs before I completely blacked out.
11: Kevin
Kayla and I had been at Dadeland Mall going at it since ten this morning and it was now going on two in the afternoon. I was tired as fuck, but I had promised her and Little Kev that I would spend the day with them shopping and maybe do dinner and a movie afterwards. Today was the first time I was able to just chill back in a long time and I wanted to lay up, get loaded, and watch some Sports Center or some shit, but the way my boo and mini me was soaking this up made me realize how much they valued my time and I valued theirs.
I loved watching Kayla tear through the stores getting any and everything she wanted without me having to tell her no or bitching at her about what we weren't able to afford. I made a bold decision to get back into the game and get my paper up. Me being a hustla after spending years in prison was always a constant issue between Kayla and me. You would think being damn near her entire family was in the streets some type of way she would get me, but ever since she gave birth to my Jr., she had no understanding.
All she did was bitch and complain. If it wasn’t about me not coming home because she feared that I would end up in jail or dead, then she was on me about cheating on her or not coming in at a decent hour. She stayed on my ass about getting a regular job to support her and my shorty and even convinced me that going back to school and getting my GED was the best thing for us.
When I got tired of her bitching, and just wanted some peace in my home, I would leave the streets alone just to make her happy. I tried working a few construction jobs and even put in some work at a couple of warehouses, but all that shit did was depress me. Even with that and Kayla making fourteen dollars an hour as a medical assistant, we never had no fucking money. She swore up and down that it was good enough for her because the bills were paid and we had a roof over our heads, but that shit was just barely making it to me, especially when I had to call my little sister Rozalyn to loan me money and Kayla on that sneak shit calling Tamar for help. She didn’t think I knew about that, but every time she went to him, Tamar would let me know, and remind me that he had work for me whenever I needed it.
That shit made me feel like less than a man. My woman should never have to ask another nigga for money, family or not, and I damn sure shouldn’t be going to my little sister to help me out. I should’ve never in the past allowed Kayla’s bitching to get to me, and get us to the point to where we had no choice but to beg others to step in to pay bills that we couldn’t pay, help out with car repairs, or even get K.J. shit that he needed for football and basketball. It was embarrassing to say the least, but Kayla and K.J.’s happiness was the most important thing in the world to me. I would do anything to put a smile on their faces, but shit had to change.
When Kayla found out that she was pregnant with our child four months ago, I knew that this nine to five shit definitely wasn’t going to be enough. I immediately hit Tamar up the same day she broke the news to me and told him I needed to be put on and that this time there was no way out for me unless I was sent back to prison or ended up dead.
I knew he was tired of me hooking up with him only to make a little money and to quit in the end, but this time I was for real about my paper. I had to secure my kids’ future and 401k’s and Gerber Baby Life insurance plans wasn’t gonna cut it. I needed to get some serious paper and stack up for my babies in case something did happen to me.
I couldn't have fucked with Tamar at a better time because he was onto some new shit. That nigga had just formed a coalition between the Mexicans, Italians, and Blacks and was now the head nigga of the UNC. Talk about big fucking paper. I never expected to be put on this big after contacting Tamar, but he had looked out for me big time.
Along with Starr’s husband Neek, we were running things head on in Miami. I held shit down in places like Liberty City, Opa-Locka, Overtown, Miami Gardens, Little Haiti, and Hialeah. Neek fucked around in the nicer areas like Coconut Grove, Downtown Miami, Morningside and up on the North slanging pills, mollies, heroin, and meth was thang. Tamar had it all. He didn’t leave a market untouched.
Sadly, after all the changes and upgrades I’ve made to our lives and the sacrifices I was out here making, Kayla still found time to complain damn near every time I fuckin’ seen her. The shit was getting on my nerves and was slowly pushing me away. Today was the first time in a long time that she hadn’t said shit that made me not want to be around her, or opt out of coming home for the night. I guess spending twenty thousand dollars in one day was enough to get a person to shut the fuck up and be happy.
“Hey, King Kev,” a bird called out as Kayla and I headed towards the food court. I swear King Kev was not a name that I gave myself, but for some reason it had just stuck to me over the past couple of months after my team started calling me that. A nigga had been off his square for so long and rubbing the bottom of the barrel that the attention, and I love I received had my fuckin’ head blown up.
I won’t lie; I was feeling the shit out of this. I owed Tamar my life and that was on everything. No matter what he and I went through in the past, he had always looked out for me whenever I needed him, and this time had been no different.
“What up,” I called out and placed my hand onto Kayla’s back. I could feel her body switch to the side as if she didn’t want me touching her. I shook my head and started to walk ahead of her along with my shorty. I wasn’t about to let her fucked up attitude get to me. “What you want to eat, K.J.?”
“Pizza!” he called out and ran to the Villa Fresh Italian Kitchen place. He loved the hell of their pizza and ate it every time we came here. I walked over and ordered K.J. and I some food. After I placed my order, I looked around for Kayla and spotted her sitting at a table with a mean ass mug on her face. I followed where she had fixed her eyes and seen a group of young ass girls staring at me while giggling and talking amongst themselves. A couple of them waved when they caught me looking, but I quickly diverted my attention to my shorty. I already knew how this day was about to end, mad that I had spoke too soon.
I pulled out my cell phone and brought up the Hotels app that was installed on my iPhone. I quickly opened it, went to my favorite place the Vintro Hotel and reserved me a room for the night. I had stayed at this place so much over the past couple of months that it had become my home away from home. The staff had become so familiar with me that they would try to accommodate me by giving me my same room whenever I made reservations. Shit was sad, but I wasn’t the arguing type especially not when my son was around.
I grabbed me and K.J.’s pizza and dreadfully headed over to where Kayla was now sitting with her arms folded across her chest. Her peanut butter colored skin was turning red, and brown eyes were staring up at the ceiling. She pushed her hair out of her face and then repeatedly tapped her foot against the floor, so I knew she was beyond pissed, but for the life of me I couldn’t understand why. Niggas checked her out all the damn time and not once did I ever get mad. That shit only made me revel in the fact th
at I was the one that had her. Instead of her doing the same, she acted like I was supposed to chew bitches out for speaking to me or even just looking.
“You not gonna get you nothing to eat. You were just saying how hungry you were,” I said trying to get past the bullshit.
“Nope, lost my fuckin’ appetite,” she hissed.
“Aye, what I tell you about all that cussing around K.J.?”
“I’m pissed, Kevin. It’s like you have no fuckin’ respect for me and I’m sick of this shit. I’m tired of being a doormat for your ass.”
“Man, what is you talking about? We were having a good day and now you tripping talking about I don’t respect you. Where is all this shit coming from?” Although I knew she was mad over these hoes speaking to me, I felt like all this animosity was coming from some place else.
"Hey King Kev," she said mockingly. "Then you got the nerve to speak back as if I'm not walking right beside you."
"Would you rather I spoke back behind your back?"
"Why the fuck do you have to speak at all?"
"Kay, I just told you to stop all that damn cussing."
"Typical you to act like ain't shit wrong, Kevin. We ain’t been really having sex, and I know if you ain't getting it from me then you getting it from somewhere else. Is you dicking down that bitch or one of the ones out that pack of hoes over there?"
"K.J., hurry up with your pizza and let’s go."
I got up from my seat and started grabbing the shopping bags. My appetite was gone and I was ready to go before I embarrassed Kayla and myself in the middle of this damn mall. This was the shit that I was talking about. I just blew through twenty stacks on material bullshit and her ass was still dissatisfied. She was the one on my arm, but yet she was worried about petty shit. I swear she loved it when I didn't come home at night. I was starting to think she loved sleeping alone and was maybe trying to make this a permanent situation between us. I felt like she was trying to push me away. That was the only thing that I could come up with on why she complained so much because she had to know that I was beyond over it.
"Let's go," I told her as I stood over her.
"Fuck you. I'll leave when I'm good and gotdamn ready. You might be the King of that bullshit you got going on in the streets, but you ain't running shit over here. Don't act like I wasn't the one just taking care of your ass less than six months ago. These bitches got your head blown up so damn much that you forgot who was there for you when you ain't have shit."
"What? Bi-" I almost forgot my shorty was sitting here and was about to come out my mouth foul and reckless, but I never wanted my son to think it was ever okay to disrespect a female. I gathered up all the bags that I could and began to walk away. "I'm going to smoke a cigarette and cool off. Be ready when I come back or else find your own way home."
12: Kayla
“Wait right here, I’ll be back,” I told K.J. as I got up and headed over to Charley’s to get me a cheesesteak. I hated to be on Kevin’s ass all the time and maybe all what I had just said to him wasn’t necessary, but I was so sick of him walking all over me. I hated this ‘wifey of a hustler’ lifestyle. I was cool on being just an average couple and making average money. I wasn’t like the rest of these hoes out here that was looking for a man with big pockets so that I could sit at home having babies and not doing shit but shopping and trying to compete with other bitches.
My family had money. Hell Tamar was my first cousin and all I had to do was ask and he was more than willing to give. A few times he had even offered to purchase me a brand new home, a car, and even set up a bank account for me, but I declined. I didn't want shit to be handed to me and plus I knew that taking those kind of handouts would be disrespectful and a spit in the face to my man.
I was cool with Kevin not having a lot. When we first started dating, I was very aware that he’d just gotten out of prison and didn’t have a much going for himself. The thing that I liked about him was that he was loving and caring and that he wanted more out of life and I thought that he was willing to work for it, but it wasn’t until after I found out that I was pregnant with Little Kevin that I realized he wanted the easy way out, which was the streets. I didn’t want that shit. I didn’t want Little Kevin to grow up being raised by some drug dealing ass niggas and around a bunch of goons that were affiliated with his father.
I didn’t even take my son around Tamar that much because of his lifestyle. This shit had taken so many of my family members away and I knew that it wouldn’t be long before I lost Kevin and my cousin Tamar to this bullshit ass game, too. Not only that, I knew how these niggas were when they were in this lifestyle. I watched my cousin cheat on Rozalyn for years and most times I was forced to keep quiet about it for having to choose my family’s side. So I knew that Kevin was out there fucking around on me and I knew that if Rozalyn knew anything about it, she wouldn’t dare say shit to me about it and I couldn't blame her.
I was far from dumb. Being a hustler attracted women just as much as being a rich ass basketball player or rapper did. I was good on that shit. I would take a regular ass nine to five having ass nigga any day of the week. I liked my sanity and I liked not having to worry about a flock of bitches coming after what was mine. I was far from an insecure female and I knew that I could step with most bitches in the looks department, but I didn’t like all the attention that Kevin was now getting and it worried me.
I could tell that his change in status had gone to his head. Neither he nor I had time to process all of this before it just all happened. It was like he had come up overnight and he didn’t even give me a chance to say how I felt about the matter. It was like he decided what our lives were going to be like without even caring if I was with it or not.
Yea I understood that we’d gone through a few times where we had to struggle in order to make ends meet, but we got through that and he knew that whenever he was down, I had his back like I was supposed to. I didn’t mean to rub that in his face moments ago, but I swear I hated this new ‘King Kev’ shit, and it was like he was forgetting all about the old him and needed to be knocked back down a couple of notches.
“Hey, can I have Bacon 3 Cheese Steak with extra onions and American cheese instead of Swiss. Let me have the cheddar, ranch, and Bacon fries too with a strawberry lemonade,” I ordered my food, paid, and stepped to the side to wait for them to be done. I looked over my shoulder to check on Little Kevin and could see he was just wrapping up with his pizza. I smiled as he flipped his long ponytail to the back and sat around patiently waiting on my return. He was a well-behaved little boy and I did have to thank Kevin for that. I was wrong for cussing in front of him like that. I knew how much Kevin hated it and was all about trying to teach his Jr. to be a great man with no limits.
“Oh, my God, how many months are you?”
I looked up to see some dark-skinned chick with a long ass weave walking in my direction. I couldn’t help but smile at her noticing that she was pregnant as well. I guess seeing someone in her status made her want to be extra friendly. I almost died when she came up to me and rubbed my stomach like she had never seen another pregnant woman before.
“I’ll be five months next week. How about you?” I asked trying to be nice to her.
“Seven. Just turned seven today. Damn, you’re small. I was as big as a house at five months.”
I shook my head. “You’re not that big now. I’m sure you probably just felt that way. You look good.”
“Thank you girl. Damn, I’m rude. Just walking up to you and rubbing your stomach and you don’t even know me. I’m Ambria.”
“Kayla,” I said tossing my head to the side after hearing her name. It kinda sounded real familiar and I couldn’t put a finger on just where I’d heard it at before. Could be me just overthinking shit though.
“So is that your first?”
“No, this is my second. I have a five year old son too.” I pointed in K.J.’s direction and she looked over and nodded her head.
�
�Bri, girl I got your food, come on. Ki-Ki about to have a damn breakdown if she don’t eat something now.”
I smiled when another girl walked up next to her. They were identical twins. A cute little girl came up to Ambria and wrapped her arms around her legs. She was one of the prettiest little girls I’d ever seen. She had to be about two years old and looked to be mixed with some smoky gray eyes. I fell in love almost immediately, and just seeing her made my want for a little girl that much stronger.
“Daddy!” the little girl let go of her mother and took off running. I smiled big as I watched her, but that smile instantly faded when she ran to Kevin and threw her hands out to him. I could see all the color in his face fade away when he saw the way I was looking at him. He pulled all that long hair of his back, and his cheeks were blush red. This had to be some kinda mistake. Kevin didn’t have any other damn kids. K.J. was his first and only.
I turned around and looked at Ambria’s twin sister and noticed a look of confusion on her face. I then looked at Ambria and saw an evil ass smirk and knew that she was the mother of that little girl.
“What’s up baby daddy?” Ambria said as Kevin walked up to us. He didn’t say anything to her and only handed the little girl to her.
“Daddy, daddy!” She bounced around in her mother’s arms trying to get back to Kevin, but he ignored her. He reached out to me and I snatched my hand away, brought it up, and slapped him dead across his muthafuckin’ face. His eyes turned the darkest of gray which only meant that he was pissed the hell off.
“Damn,” Ambria giggled.
I looked at the bitch wanting to reach out and touch that hoe, but I loved my unborn’s life too much to risk it. She had come up to me on purpose trying to act like she didn’t know who I was. I knew I had heard that name somewhere before well rather seen that name. There was some mail in Kevin’s car once before and when I asked him about it, he claimed that the mailman had placed it in the wrong box. I didn’t even pay it in mind then although I did think it was weird.