Fragile Bonds

by Adelaide Walsh

  "How else would you put it?" I glared at her.

  "Well, from a glass half full perspective I'd say you're taking a much-needed vacation, spending more time with your friends, and dating a super-hot guy."

  I felt like she was kinda missing the point here.

  "What about the whole enslaving-of-the-humans thing?"

  "Sure, there is some political upheaval happening, but we don't know for sure that the Snakes want to turn us into drones. It's been a month and a half, and they haven't done much of anything." She flippantly dismissed wild changes in our government with a flick of her wrist.

  "Except for the checkpoints set up for all traffic going in and out of the city!" Yeah, it was easy to forget that we were all effectively trapped here. Sarcasm.

  "Oh stop, you've been dodging those things like they don't even exist."

  I sat up. Isla had always been kind of a rose-colored lenses type of person, but this seemed like it was taking it a little too far. Six weeks had passed since Dariel's snakes invaded Bogotá, and during that time the Snakes had begun to systematically assert control over the country of Colombia. It started with checkpoints around the city, was followed up by the complete removal of all democratically elected personnel in the government and its associated entities, and would no doubt continue down that very slippery slope, leading to a place called 'genocide.' Okay, maybe I was being slightly dramatic, for the moment at least, but there were definitely some clear racial undertones guiding Dariel's propaganda machine.

  Isla wasn't kidding about the check points, however. I'd been skirting them without a problem since I realized they'd been put in place. It wasn't all that hard. Especially since I had pretty free access to Bear territory.

  "By the way, where is your boyfriend today?" she asked into her wine glass.

  "He's not my boyfriend," I snarled.

  "Babe, lying to yourself won't make this any easier."

  I grabbed the decorative I'd kicked to the floor earlier and smashed it over my face. "Stop," I whined into the furry white fabric.

  "You guys are a thing. Just accept it and move on. And maybe if you did, you'd be safe and happy in a big fancy bear castle instead of making your best friend harbor a fugitive."

  I loved Isla, but sometimes I freakin' hated her. And the worst part about all of this, was that she was right. Bitch.

  The day Joaquín dragged me back to the den and introduced me to Augustina, he'd also forced me to confront my guilt about not being able to save Carro, head on. Coincidentally, it had also been day one of what had turned out to be a maybe, possibly, sort of a weird kind of relationship-type thing. Ugh.

  After Joaquín's abuela—Augustina—left us, the bear alpha dragged me through the residential sector of the den, to a modest home, set into a spacious, quiet alcove. The home belonged to Lothar and Marie Russo. The parents of Carro Russo. The meeting was an emotionally charged one. Lothar and Marie were kind, honest people who invited me into their living room where they sat me down and cried out their thanks for assisting in the recovery of their son. My heart broke for these people, but the afternoon with these people did help me understand that I'd helped make the best out of a bad situation. It didn't take the sting out of my failure, but it did make it easier to bear. I still felt guilty, would very likely always feel the weight of that guilt, but sitting in front of his parents, having them give me permission to come to terms with what happened, and seeing the grief these people would carry for the rest of their lives at the loss of their son, a man I didn't even know, really put things into perspective for me.

  Marie had brought out photo albums of their small family and flipped through pictures of Carro while tears leaked from her face.

  "There are so many things he never got to do," a hiccoughing sniff, "but he led such a full life. I'm going to miss him every single day, every single breath I take," Marie sat there clutching the photo album, trying to hold back a complete breakdown, and I just fucking understood. She wasn't mourning for her own loss. She wasn't heartbroken because she'd never see her son again. She was devastated because he never got achieve all of his goals. Because the life he'd worked so hard to build had been torn away from him. She was mourning for an entirely unselfish reason, and she'd spent her whole life supporting her son, encouraging him, cheering for him to rise up to whatever aspirations he'd had. She'd earned the right to mourn. I hadn't earned anything. And so, I had no right to be brought low by my own failure in this situation. My life went on. By holing up in my apartment and wallowing in self-pity I was being selfish in a way I had no right to be. My country needed me to get up and fight for them. There were other people who would, very soon, be in Carro's same position who needed my attention. My life continued on, and in that moment, I made the decision to give Carro the respect he deserved and move past my failure. I would respect his memory by learning from that mistake, and by using my life to make an impact. To save someone else.

  When we left the home of Carro's parents, Joaquín and I walked in silence through the residential areas of the den, and out into his abuela's gardens.

  "I'm always impressed, every time I see you handle pressure like that," he murmured as he walked beside me.

  "Like what?"

  "Like you did back there. With so much grace. You're smart and witty and all that anyway, but as soon as shit hits the fan," he shook his head like he couldn't fully wrap his head around what he was about to say, "it's like I've been looking at you through a fog, and then that fog clears and suddenly you're more in your element that I even realized a person could be."

  I shrugged, unsure of how to take that compliment. If it was one.

  We stopped when we came to a small waterfall rushing over a wall of jagged rocks and feeding a small pool. Obviously, the source of the freshwater the gardens relied upon.

  "I'm glad you called Rora." He turned into me, brushing his knuckles over the back of my hand.

  I had to think about it for a second, but in the end, I agreed with him. He threaded his fingers through mine, looking at our hands, and asked "are you going to be safe in the city?"

  I dropped my forehead to his chest. "I have no idea what Emmanuel told anybody. He banished me from the building when I tried to go into work, and nobody has come looking for me so far. I'm sure I'll be fine for the time being."

  He lifted his other hand to play it through the coffee strands of my hair.

  "You might not want to publish anything political for a bit. I think you're already pretty lucky that you've escaped Dariel's attention up to now. Probably not a great idea to push your luck."

  "I've been investigating the missing persons story for a few months. I was saving most of my hard-hitting findings for that. Everything else I've published in the meantime has been pretty unbiased accounts of the shifting political climates. I was hoping to stay as neutral as possible until I had irrefutable proof."

  "I think it was a very smart strategy. In more than one way," he paused and I just let myself lean on him. "Your boss going to be ok if you aren't cranking out content for a bit?"

  I nodded. "Yeah. Emmanuel wants me to disappear for a while. I'm officially listed as working in the field on some super low-interest conflict up in Canada. Nobody is going to come around asking for articles any time soon."

  "That's good."

  We stood like that for minutes longer, finding comfort in each other and the soothing sound of the water. When it got late, he took me by the hand and walked me back to his apartment, and I went with him without much of an argument. I had decided to live my life, and if that meant leaning into whatever was happening between us, then so be it. Since that night, I'd spent more than a few nights at the den.

  My phone buzzed, tearing me out of my memories. Speak of the devil.

  Picking u up in 15. B ready but don't wait outside.

  If that bastard thought he could order me around like that he had another thing coming. I guess I growled because Isla asked "Problem?"

  "Yes.
My stalker is being a stalker."

  She rolled her eyes at me and I tapped out a furious reply on my phone.

  U don't even know where I am!!!

  Tracker on ur Jeep. 15 Mins.

  Why r u even in the city?

  No arguing.

  I held out my phone for Isla to see the text message exchange.

  "How can you tell me he's not a stalker."

  "Babe, you're dating the leader of what amounts to be a small country. Obviously, he has a tracker on your car."

  "Stop taking his side," I grumbled, and got up to pace the room. "You don't think he could have given me a little more notice? You know it takes like three hours to get here from the den."

  She shrugged, clearly not seeing any issue with this. Isla was useless. She thought we were gonna live happily ever after and shit. "I think it's cute."

  "You would."

  "He's just missing his mate. Go easy on the guy."

  That word 'mate' hit me like a ton of bricks. What!

  "His what?" I asked, horrified.

  "His mate?" She looked at me like I was totally clueless. Which I was. Because mates were a serious thing. Mating was like the changeling version of marriage, and I had no intention of getting that involved with anybody. Ever. "Changelings, mate. You know...we get married, they mate. The guy is a high-profile dude in late thirties and from the way you two have been going, he is not lookin' at you like his latest booty call."

  "Excuse me." I wanted to slap her. "I...I don't even know what to say to that. I am not getting changeling married. I'm devoted to the people of Colombia and that's about all the commitment I can handle." I was shaking my head like it would help ward off this evil thing she'd decided to dump on me fifteen minutes before I had to sit in a car with this guy. "I don't want that, Isla! I don't want that kind of life! I don't want to get married and have kids and be the fucking backup singer to anybody! Especially not Mr. Alpha over there!" I was starting to get hysterical. But none of that is what I wanted for my life. I had shit to do! I was going to be something! I was not going to live in the shadow of anyone else, I didn't care how powerful they were.

  "Calm down, crazy person." She chided. "I was joking, but you may want to discuss those feelings with your new boyfriend at some point."

  "There is no way he thinks that I would want that."

  "I think you might be surprised. Most people want to find a partner and settle down at some point. I know you've always said you don't want that, but I just figured, with how intense you two are, that might have changed. If you really can't see yourself going any further with him, you need to tell him that."

  "Way to freak me right the hell out."

  "You cannot be serious." She eyed me complete disbelief from her position on the couch. "How have you not thought to talk to him about this?"

  I felt like an idiot. The more I thought about the more I was sure Isla was right. No way was Joaquín looking for a casual relationship. Christ, we'd only been involved a few weeks and hadn't even started out casual. I started to panic. The man introduced me to his only living family member, his grandmother, on like, day one!

  When my phone buzzed again with a text message from the aforementioned man, I was still panicking. When I got into his SUV I was still panicking. And when he asked me what the hell my problem was because my heart was racing and I was plastered to the edge of the seat like I thought he could infect me with some horrible disease, I was still, in fact, panicking.

  "Nothing, I'm fine." I said, refusing to meet his gaze, staring straight ahead out of the windshield.

  "Liar."

  "I'm not a liar. I'm fine. Everything is fine."

  He rolled his eyes at me. "We don't have time for this, Adriana. There's been another abduction and I'm going to need you to pull yourself together."

  "What? One of yours? Who?"

  As we drove, he explained the situation the me, and my inner spaz went quiet as I focused on the details of what he was telling me. When we passed the Snake checkpoint, Joaquín flashed two Bear passports and we were waved through without so much as a second glance. I didn't even bother to give him shit about the fake ID, my mind preoccupied with what I could do to help and actually rescue the victim this time, not just recover a body.

  A high-ranking member of a small Jaguar pack south of Las Furia was abducted in an attempt at capturing the Jaguar's alpha, Anton. The jaguar alpha had been scheduled to meet several of his officers for a routine patrol briefing. The only reason Anton hadn't actually been taken, was because his assistant had fallen down the stairs as they were leaving and he'd sent his second in command, Beno, so that he could accompany the woman to the medic. The change had been made at the last minute, entirely in person. No comms involved, so there'd been no way for the Snakes to know that the man in the vehicle they attacked was not Anton.

  Joaquín pulled off the throughway only minutes outside the city.

  "Where are we going?"

  "Only got a few hours left, reinita. Probably shouldn't spent all of that drivin'."

  He parked the car outside what appeared to be a two or three car garage in the middle of a small clearing surrounded by dense trees. The second the engine cut, he was out of the truck, and moving toward the garage. I jumped out, running after him. He was clearly on edge. The loss of Carro still burned, and this was our chance to make a difference. To save someone.

  He hauled the large sliding door open, just enough for us both to get through. In the center of the sparsely filled space was a machine that made my inner child start jumping up and down in excitement. The matte black helicopter looked huge in the small space, but in reality, only sat about four people.

  "Who is going to drive this thing?" My voice was shrill in my own ears.

  Joaquín grinned, and that grin and competence it implied made things low in my body tighten.

  "No," I shook my head, " no way."

  "Get in, reinita."

  I tried, I really did, but this was a helicopter we were talking about here and I refused to be held responsible for the squeal I emitted.

  "Can I drive it? Just a little?" I begged as he held my hand, helping me climb into the fuselage.

  "Put your headset on, baby." His voice was oddly tender, but I didn't dwell on the change, nor the way he looked at me with a melted look on his face. "I'll teach you to fly next time. Right now we gotta get home and talk to Anton."

  The way he said home, was like a punch to the heart, but I was too excited about riding in the helicopter to panic about the future of our relationship. He tapped a button on the control panel and the roof of the hangar slid, in sections, into itself. I strapped myself in as he flipped switches and radioed to someone back at the den. Rora, Joaquín's second in command, answered through the headphones, confirming clearance for the flight path.

  "Anton is very much looking forward to meeting you, Adriana. Let's get his man back," she said through connection.

  Joaquín slapped his hand over my knee.

  "You ready, reinita?"

  I nodded, and the helicopter lifted into the air, passing gracefully through the opening in the hangar roof and we soared through the sky, over my beloved rainforest. The view was breathtaking. Watching the Amazon river wind through the thick pelt of forest, flocks of birds swarm over the treetops, and the lush green of vegetation, sparkling with life below us made my heart flutter. This place was so fucking beautiful. No sane person who had ever lived here, who had experienced this incredible source of life and magic for themselves could possibly want to destroy this. I couldn't fathom what frame of mind would allow a person to rip through all of this wonder bent on exploitation.

  The ride was short, only about thirty minutes from takeoff to landing, and when we touched down in a clearing close to the den, Rora, Bella, Arc, and Samuel met us as the landing pad to escort us back to the den. As we walked, Bella spat out an update on the Jaguars and who exactly what waiting for us in Joaquín's office.

  Anton, the Jagu
ar alpha and four of his highest-ranking lieutenants were draped in the chairs framing Joaquín's enormous conference table, when we entered the room. But as soon as I'd cleared the doorway, Anton stood up, gave Joaquín a cool nod. From everything I'd learned over the last month—which wasn't a whole lot; most of the bears still treated me as an outsider—the changeling packs weren't nearly as connected as I'd previously thought they were. In fact, they not only existed entirely separately, they barely, if at all, communicated. So, the fact that Anton had reached out to Joaquín personally was a huge move.

  I stepped forward to shake the Jaguar alpha's hand, and the moment I touched him I felt...a spark. An awareness of him I hadn't expected. He was a gorgeous man, tall, lean with defined muscle structure, and short cropped hair that threw the attractive lines of his face into focus. He was sexy, sure, but the vibration I got from him was different than the instant bond I felt with Joaquín on our first meeting. When he clasped his hand over mine, the edges of my vision blurred, just slightly. Just enough for me to notice. I shook my head and pulled away, thinking I was maybe feeling light-headed from the quick descent in the helicopter.

  "Adriana, is it? I've heard a lot about you."

  Joaquín stepped closer to me, sliding his arm around my waist, causing Anton to step backwards. "Oh, you have?" I asked, needing to diffuse some of the tension building between the two men.

  He smiled, flashing white teeth and prowling over to the table with feline grace. "Yeah, gorgeous, Jada was my first call this morning. Caimans and cats mingle a bit." He winked at me, and I can't lie, I felt butterflies. The man was smooth, and sex personified. I felt a little wave of guilt wash over me at reacting like this to another man, while my own was standing at my back.

  Covering my beating heart with the sound of my voice, I asked "So what happened? I need the details. I'll do everything I can to help you get him back, but the Snakes tend to keep these abductions under pretty tight wraps."

  Anton's eyes flicked over to Joaquín, then back to me, and he seemed hesitant. "We heard...that you might be able to help us in a more unique way."