Defying Instinct (Demon Instinct Series)

by Jaye A. Jones

  “Not a ruler.” I forced a reply, then grinned as I thought of Mina. “Maybe a leader.”

  I saw the moment his mind was made up, because the radiant glow in his eyes lit up the dim corner of The Bookstore. It helped that I could feel what he was feeling too.

  He stalked on hands and knees above me, white gold eyes wide as he looked at every inch of me on his way past. The glow from his eyes made the skin under my clothes heat as they grazed, leisurely, possessively taking in all of me. I threaded my hands into his hair as soon as he was close enough, and slinked my legs around the backs of his thighs, urging him closer, wishing there wasn’t so much clothing keeping his skin from mine.

  I almost blushed as I did it, but my days of holding myself back were through. The not-cashmere, beige sweater and white t-shirt underneath found its way into my grasp, felt incredible under my touch. But that was not the feel I was looking for tonight.

  The material made a delicious swishing sound as it slid over Rowan’s tanned muscles, and I dropped it to the ground.

  “Wow,” I couldn’t help the throaty word. My male was unbelievable.

  My hands shook a little as I raised them to his neck, sliding down his prominent collar bone, over broad shoulders, down the length of each thick arm, and back up again.

  His kiss was sensual, slow and savoring. Rowan’s fangs and claws may have been lethal, but those lips had the power to tear me apart.

  “You’re so soft,” he growled, the contrast of his rough voice and the sweet words driving me crazy. “You’re lips,” he kissed me. “You’re hair,” he ran his hand from root to tip, letting it fall one strand at a time, tickling my sensitive neck. “You’re skin,” he said, one hand on my cheek and let it smooth down my jaw, my chin, my neck.

  His hands kept going, fingers sliding down between my breasts, then my ribcage. He lifted my shirt and trailed sizzling fingers along my stomach, circling my belly button.

  Rowan’s lips, those dangerous lips replaced his trailing fingers, and he followed the same path as he traced back up my body, only with his mouth. And occasionally fangs.

  Each time a pointed canine grazed flesh, a shot of blazing electricity zinged, making my ache for him almost unbearable. The first time it happened, I shrieked. The second, I moaned, low and throaty, feeling an exquisite pressure building deep inside.

  “You are so…” Rowan’s voice was deeper than ever before, and his breathing was as erratic as mine as he asked against my mouth. “What word nobody-ever-uses-in-real-life would you use?”

  I grinned against his lips. Receptive.

  With his warm laughter, I whispered, “only for you.”

  As his mouth on mine slowly twisted into a smile, I thought my entire body might catch fire right there on the couch.

  Every time he touched me, I knew it truer than the time before. It was him for me. No male could make me feel the way he made me feel.

  As his claws grazed along the inseam of my jean-like pants, making my hips buck sharply although I was trying to keep still, Rowan froze.

  “What’s wrong now?” I huffed, stunned and puzzled, then aggravated. “You know, I’m not going to keep convincing you with these passionate speeches forever.”

  He raised his eyebrows. “No?”

  “Well,” I tugged on his belt loops, trying to force him down again. “Maybe not.”

  Though he grinned, his body stayed crouched above me, his muscles tensed. And his hand that was so dangerously close to extremely sensitive places moved to my hip. He kissed me, but it was a distracted kiss, keeping our bodies separated. Though my pulse was galloping, I understood.

  What is it?

  The amusingly disgruntled look on Rowan’s face almost made the interruption tolerable as he said, “Cyrus is calling for us.”

  With an irritated sigh, I released Rowan’s belt loops and unwrapped my legs from his. “Awesome.”

  I tossed him his sweater, attempting to steal one last, greedy glimpse of his gorgeous chest, but my gaze got stuck there as I pulled on my socks. My eyes must have looked as disappointed as I felt when his sweater was back in place, because Rowan noticed.

  “I could stare at you for days,” choosing winded honesty as my explanation, then slipped into my boots without taking my attention off him.

  The white gold in his eyes was turbulent, had been since the first detonation lit up The Bookstore. It made me think naughty things I didn’t know I was capable of thinking.

  “Next time,” Rowan held his hand out, lifted me, and tugged at the bottom of my shirt, getting it back into place, “we will not be disturbed.”

  I could have said there may not be a next time. I could have said we didn’t know what tomorrow might bring, and we’d had so little time alone together, there were no guarantees. We had obligations now, responsibilities, at least for the next two days.

  And I may not survive this. I may die without ever…without ever having him.

  As if he could sense my growing doubts, Rowan smoothed a hand down the length of my hair, and took my wrist, grazing his unglamoured fangs along my sensitive tendons. It made me quiver, and hate Cy a little for his terrible timing.

  “I plan to do that to every inch of this luscious skin of yours,” and I quivered again as I thought about him doing that.

  Before we jumped, I stood on my toes so I could speak into his ear. “And I plan to offer you my virginity.”

  CHAPTER 39

  Only afterward did I realize I may not have had the best timing in the world either. The jump to Cyrus—wherever he was—was the most volatile I’d ever experienced. So much so, that when the whirlwind stopped, Rowan looked at me with wide eyes, swallowed hard, and mumbled, “Sorry.”

  A bout of queasiness from the chaotic trip started to ease, and the room stopped spinning. When I was pretty sure I was fine again, I glanced at Rowan, then had to look away.

  “I think it was my fault,” I admitted, looking around, trying to determine where we were.

  My Sentinel chuckled. “It was.”

  “Where are we?” I asked, changing the subject because if we kept talking about it, I wouldn’t be able to think.

  “Hadrian’s home,” Cyrus said from the corner. He looked stretched thin, like he’d been on alert for too many hours in a row. I was about to ask about Tanis, if she was why he looked so tired and strung out, but if Hadrian was near, I didn’t want him knowing about her.

  “He was okay with all of us jumping into his home?” I asked instead.

  “He let us,” Rowan said. “Sorcerers can keep us out when they want.”

  Of course they could. Hadn’t I said I was going to try to learn more about these demon customs I knew nothing about? I looked at Rowan’s crumpled hair, his beige sweater that had been in a pile on the floor only minutes ago, and knew I’d had other, way more interesting distractions to occupy my time. Learning about demon ways hadn’t seemed as important. Now, I wished we could have worked it into the conversation at some point. I was at a huge disadvantage, knowing nothing.

  The Sorcerer’s home was enormous. The furniture was all black iron and stone. A couch was crafted out of small boulders. Iron bookshelves with books I would have given an arm to peruse littered the walls. It wasn’t exactly inviting, but it looked like the Underrealm. Maybe to a primeval Sorcerer, it was perfect.

  Stepping over to a window and peeling the curtains back, I peered out to see if I recognized anything. And I did, from TV and movies.

  Hadrian didn’t live in the Underrealm. He didn’t live at Faction or dwell in some sinister castle where vultures should have been circling overhead like Iliana. The Sorcerer demon, my first glimpse at a true, unmasked demon, lived in a penthouse apartment overlooking the serenity of the ocean.

  “Guess he didn’t move from California with the rest of you last year,” I said, returning the curtain to its original place and stepping closer to the two Hammers.

  “I am not bound by the Royal,” the metal on rock voice scr
eeched, making me ease even closer to Rowan and Cyrus. “I live where I wish.”

  “And you choose here?”

  “Have you seen the view?” the Sorcerer said, pointing to the window I was looking out. I was stunned silent by his casual manner. Unlike the first time I’d seen him, when he came to The Bookstore and unglamoured me, he didn’t look quite as sinister. I’d seen Astor, Octavia, and a few Sorcerer children since that day. He didn’t look nearly as shocking now that I’d seen more like him.

  And none of them had looked as inhuman as my own mother.

  “I’ve never seen the ocean before.” I met his black eyes, grinning.

  Hadrian was visibly surprised by my calm attitude too. Of course he thought I’d be frightened of him. Did he think I was here to try to harm him? He wouldn’t have let us visit if he did.

  “Why have you come here, Daughter of Iliana?”

  Nodding, appreciating getting right to the point, I said, “I’ve agreed to the Blooding.”

  “Have you lost your mind?” he wailed. “It is not only dangerous. It is likely that it will kill you. You are weak. Your mind will not be strong enough to survive, even if your body somehow does.”

  “I’m aware of the possibilities,” I said, though going nuts hadn’t been something I’d considered. “But this is happening. There’s no getting out of it now.”

  “That still doesn’t explain why you have requested to see me. This Warrior you sent was quite…” Hadrian made a sound at Cyrus that made my hair stand up, “persistent for you.”

  Too bad I didn’t get to see that, I thought, giving Cy a projection of my gratitude.

  “I need a Sorcerer.” The statement hit Hadrian, made his beady eyes widen.

  “You think I can suggest someone, introduce you?”

  Taking a step forward, away from the protective enclosure of the two Hammer demons, I hit the Sorcerer with a projection of resolve.

  “I think you’re one.”

  Hadrian put a hand to his forehead, suddenly looking very human. “Now I know you have lost your mind.”

  “I need a full-caste demon from each caste in a little over a day. If I can’t find them, Iliana will and I can’t have that happen.” I took another step closer. “You understand that, don’t you?”

  Hadrian nodded once.

  “I don’t expect you to be my advisor. Just show up for the Blooding so it’s on my terms as much as possible. After, you can forget all about me if you want. I’d completely understand. Of course, if I die, it won’t be a problem anyway.”

  “This is…irregular.”

  I shrugged, “that’s me.” Apparently.

  “We’ll go.” I telepathed to the two Hammers to head for the door. “Please, think about it. You’d be doing me a favor. The Blooding is the morning after tomorrow.”

  “You are not what I expected, Scion.”

  I turned back with my chin up and eyes meeting his. “I hope you’re not what I expected either.”

  With a nod, we exited the penthouse, and were directly in front of the elevator on the other side of the door. I pressed the button, and with a Hammer on each side, I watched the numbers above the elevator door light up one by one. There were forty floors.

  “Sentinel,” Hadrian beckoned Rowan over from the open doorway behind us. I leaned into Cyrus’s shoulder as we waited at the elevator door. Rowan jumped back inside the Sorcerer’s apartment.

  “Can you hear them?” I asked Cy, keeping my attention on the closed elevator doors.

  “Rowan is telepathing the conversation to me.” I felt the strangest sense of jealousy that Cyrus was connected to him like that and I wasn’t. “The Devil is telling Rowe, if he cares for you, to convince you to run. He is certain you will die.”

  “Him and everyone else,” I muttered. “Now what’s he saying?”

  Cyrus shook his head. “He’s keeping me out now.”

  I turned to Cy. “What do you think? Will the Blooding kill me?”

  “I’ve never witnessed a Blooding ceremony, but Grayson said Iliana was inaccessible for fourteen days after, he assumed, in recovery. When he was Blooded with Nikolai, Grayson said the Sorcerer went insane for a while. Some say it was the first sign of his instability to come. Some say it was the reason he became unstable.”

  “Oh.”

  We stayed silent until the elevator finally reached the fortieth floor, and the doors dinged as they opened. Cyrus held the door until Rowan jumped back to us.

  “Did you catch all that?” Rowan asked Cy as we all entered the elevator.

  “Only the beginning.”

  “I had a feeling he was blocking you,” Rowan said, taking my wrist, and putting it to his lips when the elevator door closed in front of us. It was like it calmed him.

  “What’d you tell him about me running?” I asked, trying to focus as Rowan unglamoured and put his fangs on my skin, giving me goosebumps.

  Through the shiny reflection of the metal, elevator door, I saw Cyrus’s reaction. He shifted, uncomfortable about something. His eyes shot over to Rowan, whose huge fangs were sinking into my wrist but not hard enough to break the skin, making a twist of pleasure tighten in my belly. Cyrus’s eyes snapped forward, and I was positive his skin flushed, and for a second, he was almost frightened.

  “I told him I’d have you run if I could.” Rowan lowered my wrist, but didn’t let it go. “Savannah, if I thought there was even the slightest chance of convincing you, I’d be doing nothing else right now.”

  Run? Be a coward. Save myself and put everyone else in danger. It wasn’t an option.

  “But you know I won’t.”

  He bowed his head. “I do.”

  “Do you think he’ll show up?”

  “I don’t know, Savannah.” Rowan slipped his arm around my shoulders, something that seemed instinctual now. “There are no guarantees when bargaining with a Sorcerer.”

  “Guess we’ll have to wait and see,” I said, putting my hands around Rowan’s waist and holding on, preparing for the jump I knew was coming.

  Before the elevator reached the ground floor, we were already home.

  CHAPTER 40

  “How was your…last day, sweet?” I knew it pained Rowan to call today what I’d been calling it since morning. He didn’t want this to be my last day. Knowing that made me rise on my toes and kiss his neck, something I was beginning to do often. “Was it everything you wanted it to be?”

  Maybe it was morbid, but it helped to be frank about the reality of tomorrow. I could live through it. It was a possibility. But I no longer expected it, not after Hadrian last night urging me to run. Astor had shown me a little bit of her demon power, and it brought me to my knees. If that was only a taste, I believed this was my last day to enjoy this world.

  I spent three hours drinking coffee with Benn at our coffee shop, which had miraculously been repaired since Matteo and Octavia broke their front window. Rowan said the advisors most likely fixed the damage the moment we jumped back to The Bookstore, erasing the memory from any human minds who may have witnessed it. Benn thought it was awesome.

  My best friend and I reminisced. We talked about our fathers. We laughed until my face hurt from smiling. Before we had to say goodbye, I took a knife, cut a small X on the top of his left hand, and pricked my finger, letting a drop of blood fall into the cut. Marking him. Now he had two small Xs on his hand, one fresh, one mostly healed. The sight made me want to cry.

  After, I sent Rowan to get Dmitri and found Dad at his Wash U office between classes. I hugged him, told him I loved him, and had Dmitri breach his mind and put him in a daze so I could Mark him.

  I may have wanted Victor Cole to be Marked, but he wasn’t ready to know what I did to him. Rowan Marked Dad while he slept, so he never even knew. As far as Dad was concerned, I was a half-caste with no discernable demon abilities. I thought we’d both prefer it that way.

  When Dmitri released him, he was unknowingly Marked by the Scion, and had to scurry off to
class.

  I found the deed to The Bookstore, the list of new books I’d ordered and should arrive any day, along with all the other important documents Dad might need if I never returned. I put the thick envelope in the mail with The Bookstore as its destination. If everything was fine, no big deal. If I was gone, Dad would get all the necessary paperwork.

  My clothes for tomorrow were folded, waiting. My cell phone was fully charged in case I needed it. The front door was locked, shades still completely drawn, the sign turned to Closed.

  So when Rowan asked if the day was everything I wanted, I could say with absolute certainty, “There’s only one more thing I want.”

  Looking up at Rowan, he swallowed hard when our eyes met. “What’s that, love?”

  I watched, willing myself not to look away from the white gold ring that had remained around his iris all day as I said, “I want you.”

  The white gold shattered outward like lightening, and my knees buckled a little. When I was positive I’d be able to walk, I led him up the stairs, and we walked through the dark, into my apartment.

  “When did you know?” I asked, needing to talk before I lost my nerve.

  “Know what?”

  “That you wanted me too.” I slipped my shirt over my head. “Was it when I half undressed in front of you after class that night?”

  Though he growled softly, deep in his chest, he said as I passed by him on my way to the bedroom, letting my bare arm graze him, “I’ve seen you naked before.”

  I flushed, having forgotten about those first few moments after being unglamoured. Since I hadn’t exactly been myself at the time, I must have successfully repressed that he had to have seen me naked before putting his sweater over me.

  “Please don’t tell me it was then.” I unhooked my bra, letting it fall to the floor outside the dark bedroom, then stepped inside the shadows.

  He chuckled, and followed. “No, not then.”

  “When?” I asked, shimmying out of my pants. I sighed when Rowan finally removed his sweater, and my body electrified at the sheer sight of him.