One Hot Fake: An Accidental Fake Marriage Romance

by Sarah J. Brooks

  Then Leonard leaves, and that’s when Marian spots me. It’s too late to slide down and hide; besides, she can see the car. She stares at me and then marches toward the car.

  I roll down my window as she nears.

  “Don’t tell me you’ve been here all this time?” Marian says.

  Is she angry? The afternoon sun’s glare is casting shadows on her face, and I can’t tell. “Yes, I thought I’d stick around just in case.”

  “Just in case what?” she says, her voice cool.

  I feel foolish, but I don’t regret my decision to stay. I don’t trust Leonard, and she shouldn’t either. “Just in case you needed me.”

  Marian leans on the window, bringing her face real close to mine. “Listen here, Declan, I’m already dealing with one psycho; I don’t want to have to deal with another.”

  I feel like she’s slapped me. “Aren’t you the same person who celebrated when I punched Leonard?”

  “Yes,” Marian says, her voice tense. “But I didn’t appoint you as my bodyguard. I can take care of myself. I always have.”

  I stare at her dumbfounded. I can’t believe she’s turned a nice gesture from me into a suspect one.

  “I’ll make my way home,” she says and then turns around and walks back to her office.

  I blink rapidly and realize two things. One, I’ve been dismissed until the next time my services are needed, and two, Marian is the driver in this relationship. She alone gets to decide when we can turn on our feelings and when we need to turn them off.

  Indignation swells inside me. I gun the engine and jam the car into gear. I head to the shop, determined not to give any more thought to Marian. Work, as always, is my medicine, and by the time it’s evening, my anger has dissipated.

  I’m the last to leave, and as I close up, Ace calls me.

  “Hey, was that your car outside the pizza shop?” he says, and when I answer in the affirmative, he continues, “I’m at the station for a shift. Want to pass by?”

  “Sure.” I’m not looking forward to going home to spend a tense evening with Marian. I hate confrontations and arguments.

  Ace is waiting for me outside the station. We sit on the steps, exchange pleasantries, and watch the sunset. It resembles the bright orange color of a raging fire.

  “Hey, let me ask you something,” I tell Ace. “What is marriage really like? Is it fun and awesome one day and explosive the next?”

  Ace chuckles. “That pretty much describes it.”

  My heart sinks. I don’t want to live like a yoyo or like a man on drugs. I don’t like high highs and low lows. I want to be on an even keel.

  “Don’t you get tired of it?” I ask Ace.

  “Sure you do, but then you remember that the worst day is better than the best day when you were alone,” Ace says.

  All that sounds like a load of bull, and I tell him as much.

  “I don’t expect you to understand,” Ace says. “It’s early days for you. One day you’ll understand.”

  A bell goes off, and Ace jumps to his feet. “Gotta go. Work beckons. Thanks for coming by. I’ve missed you. Tell Marian to stop keeping you to herself.” He slaps my shoulder and enters the firehouse.

  I stand up and cross to the other side, where my car is parked. For the first time, I consider that I might not be cut out for relationships. I admit to myself that I don’t know the rules of marriage.

  How far should I go to protect my wife? What are the boundaries? Am I a psycho? That last question is frightening. No woman has ever accused me of being a psycho, but then again, I’ve never felt or behaved this way with another woman.

  Maybe I’m coming on too strong. I feel deflated, like a balloon that was full of air and someone malicious poked it with a needle. As I drive home, I inhale deeply.

  Maybe I need to back off. Now that Marian has what she wanted, which is a baby, she’s not sure about our marriage and if she wants to make it work. There are so many unknowns in this relationship.

  I stop outside Marian’s house. The living room lights are on, and I imagine her on the couch with her laptop on her lap, staring at me politely. Maybe wishing that I would disappear. The last thing I want is to be a pest.

  I jam the car into gear and drive off.

  Chapter 28

  Marian

  Declan has been calling me all morning, but I’ve ignored him except for a terse text telling him that I’m fine but busy. Part truth. It wasn’t my best day. My clients seemed to have agreed that today was the day to be difficult.

  Janice, one of my brides, wanted me to call the wedding dress store where she’d bought her dress and tell them she had changed her mind. This, when her wedding is a week away. Not possible.

  Helen, the mother of one of the grooms, called to inform me that she and her husband were not going to pay for the wedding unless the bride and groom added ten more people to the wedding list—their friends.

  By midmorning, my head is aching, and I’m badly in need of a break. Work has kept me occupied so that I don’t think of Declan. I leave the office and pop into the boutique, but Maggie is busy with a client, and I leave soon after.

  Back in my office, my thoughts meander to Declan. His disappearance last night brought back memories of Leonard doing the same thing when he wanted to punish me. He would disappear for days without a word, and I would go crazy with worry, calling all his friends and his mom. Granted, Declan had sent me a text saying he had gone to Santa Monica. Just that, no explanation, nothing.

  Marriage and relationships are always sweet at first until the cracks start showing. Was our marriage starting to crack already? What would Declan do the next time we disagreed or when I spoke my mind about something he didn’t like? Would he become abusive?

  I tremble even though it’s a warm day. A knock on the door jerks me back to the present. I call for the knocker to enter, and Eric peers in. “Your husband is here to see you,” he says, a look of amusement on his features.

  Leonard had announced himself the same way yesterday. I’d explained to Eric and Kimberly that he was actually my ex.

  “Tell him to come in,” I say, trying to veil my irritation.

  I fix a smile on my face when Leonard enters. “I love this place,” he says.

  “Hi,” I say, eager to get to his reason for stopping by. “What brings you here?”

  He sits down. “I have to go back to Arlen on some urgent business, and I was hoping that you’ve decided by now.”

  I never noticed before that Leonard has beady eyes. Or that one eye is slightly bigger than the other. Maybe that’s why he’s always wearing sunglasses.

  “I’ll tell you the same thing I told you yesterday. That’s never going to happen.” Maybe if I say it enough times, it will get through his thick skull.

  Leonard smiles. “Do you remember the early days, how much fun we had together? We liked taking walks in the woods and stopping by the stream.” He laughs. “We would go back home completely wet after splashing water on each other.”

  Despite everything, I laugh as memories wash over me. We had been so young and so full of life and hope. Leonard was fun then until he allowed insecurity and darkness to consume him.

  “Do you remember how we used to laugh over the silliest things?” he says.

  I stare at him. “I also remember the insults you liked to throw.”

  That wipes the smile from his face. “I’ve changed. I’m a different man. Besides, you think that the schmuck you are with is any different? He’s quick to anger.”

  “So are you.”

  “I’ve addressed my anger issues. I saw a shrink for three years, Marian,” Leonard says.

  “I don’t care what you have or haven’t done, Leonard. It’s over. Please just leave me alone.”

  He looks crestfallen. I’m not moved. I went through hell in his hands. He turned me into a woman none of my friends recognized. A woman who was frightened of sudden movements. I’ve worked hard to bury the ghosts of my past and to
become the woman I am today.

  Nothing would make me even consider having Leonard back into my life.

  “I’m going back home today, but I’ll be waiting for your call. I’m an optimistic guy,” Leonard says.

  I contemplate him for a few seconds as I remember what Declan said. “Tell me something, and don’t lie. Why did you go looking for the marriage certificate?”

  He sighs and sits back down. “I have a daughter. Her name is Samantha. She’s three years old.”

  “Oh.” That is news. I’m happy for him. “Go on.”

  “I went to the courthouse to verify that we were divorced as the mother wanted us to get married. I didn’t want to. I can’t tell you how happy I was to find that we’re still married,” Leonard says.

  I consider something that I never did when Leonard and I were married. He could be insane. All that time, I thought I was dealing with a normal person.

  “We’re not married. The certificate not being signed was a clerical error.” I speak to him as if I’m speaking to a child.

  “I’m not a fool, Marian,” he snaps, reminding me of how quickly his anger came on. It started small and then exploded like a blaze that had had gasoline doused on it. “I know that it was a clerical error, but I’m thinking it’s a sign that we’re meant to be together.”

  I feel the onset of a migraine. “Where’s Samantha’s mother now?”

  “She went off and left me with Samantha,” Leonard says, but he doesn’t seem bothered by it.

  “Where’s Samantha?”

  “In Arlen. She lives with my mother until you and I can sort out our arrangements. Then she can come and stay with us,” Leonard says.

  This is sick. I’m tempted to blurt out my own news, but I hold my tongue. Leonard doesn’t need to know. Besides, I’ve decided to keep the news to myself and the few people who already know until my appointment tomorrow with the obstetrician.

  Leonard sees me fidgeting in my seat. “Okay, I’ll go. I know you’re busy. Promise to call me in a few days and let me know when you’re coming down,” Leonard says.

  I can’t wait for him to get out of my office. I sit staring into space as I digest the news that Leonard has a daughter. His mother, Fiona, will raise her well. She’s got a good heart but is weak where Leonard is concerned. She could never stand up to him, but luckily for her, Leonard dotes on her.

  My life feels messed up right now. I lower my hand to my belly and instantly feel peace. Nothing else matters except for Declan and my baby. Anything else that is going on is short-term.

  Leonard will realize that I’m not going to budge, and he’ll agree to a motion for judgment nunc pro tunc. Declan and I will work through our differences as all couples do, and life will go back to normal. I love normal.

  I’m out of the office most of the afternoon, finalizing venues and attending several meetings. I make it home at six, and my heart leaps when I see Declan’s car in the driveway. Relief floods me, and I can’t believe the joy and anticipation I feel just knowing he’s in the house. Still, I keep my cool as I stroll into the sweet-smelling kitchen. I can’t keep a smile from my face when I see him, clad in an apron.

  He turns to me. “Hey you,” he says.

  We stand facing each other, unsure of the next move. He’s the first to move. He closes the distance between us and plants a chaste kiss on my cheek.

  “Dinner smells lovely,” I say, at a loss for words.

  “Steak with porcini butter, tarragon sauce, roasted cauliflower, and crunchy potatoes,” Declan says.

  My stomach growls in response. “Yum.”

  “Go on and take your shower. Still a while before it’s ready.”

  My heart is beating crazily in my chest. “Okay.” As I look into his eyes, I see something I’ve never seen before. Vulnerability. “Okay,” I repeat. I’d better go and take that shower before I make a complete fool of myself. I feel as if I’m in foreign seas that I don’t know how to navigate.

  I’m glad for the shower and the time alone. By the time I’m finished and dressed, I feel a little more in control of my emotions. I don’t throw on my usual relaxing sweats. I pick a pretty pink sleeveless top and a mini skirt that’s casual enough for dinner at home.

  I comb out my hair and let it flow to my shoulders, ignoring the voice in my head demanding to know why I’m going to so much trouble.

  I’m glad I made an effort when Declan shoots me an appreciative glance.

  “You look beautiful, but then again, you always do,” he says as he comes to the island and pulls back the stool for me. “Dinner is ready.”

  “Thank you,” I murmur as I sit down. I feel like a guest in my own home. My hands feel like they belong to someone else. I place them on the island, but that doesn’t feel comfortable, and I drop them to my lap.

  Declan brings over two plates of food, followed by two glasses of water.

  I groan as I look at the delicious smelling food. “I’m going to get fat.” I inhale the sweet scent of the food. “It smells like heaven. How am I supposed to resist?”

  “You’re not,” Declan says. “You’re eating for two, remember?”

  I grin. “I have an excuse for gluttony for the next eight months or so.” I dig into the food. The potatoes are perfectly crunchy, and the steak, just right.

  “Speaking of the baby, isn’t your appointment with the obstetrician tomorrow?” Declan says.

  I nod, unable to speak because of the food in my mouth.

  “I want to come with you,” Declan says.

  I almost choke on my food. Somehow, I hadn’t thought about Declan coming with me. Leonard never attended even one appointment with me.

  “Is that okay?” Declan asks.

  I swallow. “Yes, of course.” Emotion grabs me by the throat. That’s a nice thing for Declan to do.

  “Any morning sickness today?” he says.

  “No, come to think of it, none at all.” I grin, pleased that the uncomfortable nauseous episode is over. Hopefully, for the rest of my pregnancy.

  “I’m sorry I wasn’t there this morning,” Declan says.

  “It’s fine. We don’t have an agreement that you should be by my side all the time,” I say, a defensive note in my voice. I can’t bear to look at him because I might burst into tears. I attribute the swirl of emotions in me to pregnancy.

  Declan places his hand on mine. “Maybe. But we had an unstated agreement that I would come home. I came, sat in the drive for a few minutes, then decided to go to Santa Monica.”

  I stare at him, shocked. I can’t imagine him being in the driveway and not coming in. “Why?”

  “You were upset, and I didn’t want to be in your face,” Declan says.

  “You wouldn’t have been in my face,” I say. “Besides, this is your home too, and you have a right to be here.”

  “Now I know,” Declan says. “Now, we need to talk about yesterday.”

  I inhale deeply. “We do.”

  “I’m not sure I understand the boundaries of our marriage. I don’t trust Leonard, and I didn’t want to leave you alone with him. Marian, this is a man who hit you.”

  “I get that,” I say. “But Leonard was in my office. I was surrounded by people. I didn’t need you to protect me.” It hurts to see the hurt that comes over his features, but I have to say it. “I’m not a damsel in distress, Declan, and I’ll never allow myself to be that again.”

  He looks away before he swings his glance back at me. “You make me feel things I’ve never felt before, and I just don’t know how to do this.”

  “Me too, Declan,” I say, forging ahead. “I’ve never felt for anyone the way I feel, but I’m frightened too. There’s so much at stake now.”

  He stares at me intently. “I want to be in you and the baby’s life forever, Marian. We can do this.”

  I let out a shaky breath. “I want that too, but I have to trust that you’ll give me space. I’ll let you know if I need you.”

  Declan is silent for a
moment. “I’m not sure that’s a promise I can keep. I’m naturally protective of people I love.”

  Frustration wells up inside me. “Can you at least promise to try?”

  He nods. “Sure.”

  Chapter 29

  Marian

  I dozed most of the morning, but I can’t bring myself to be mad at Declan for keeping me up half the night. I enjoyed his gentle lovemaking, though it was a little frustrating. He insisted on being super gentle because of the baby.

  My appointment with the obstetrician is at noon, and at eleven-thirty, Declan shows up at my office. The corners of my lips lift in a smile when I hear his voice. My sleepiness disappears, and I turn off my computer and start to get ready to leave. We meet at the doorway and pause for a few seconds to hug and kiss. I like being a couple. I forgot how nice it was always to have someone to hug and hold.

  “Are you excited?” Declan asks me in the car.

  “I am,” I say. “Distract me and tell me about the renovations. The opening day is coming up.”

  “I know. I’ve done it once before with the Santa Monica one, but it feels like the first time.”

  “You sound like a virgin who is not sure whether she had sex or not,” I tell him with a laugh.

  Declan bursts out laughing. “You have a way with words, but that’s exactly how I feel. Anyway, it’s going well. The equipment starts coming in next week.”

  Talking about the pizza shop keeps me distracted until we get to the clinic.

  “Here goes,” Declan says as we leave the car and walk up to the clinic’s double glass doors.

  At the reception, I give the lady my name, and she directs us to a waiting room down the hallway. Two other very pregnant women are seated in the waiting room. My gaze gravitates toward their tummies with a mixture of envy and awe and fear. How will I handle it when I get to the five-month mark knowing that was the period when I lost my Lilly?