by Jodi Thomas
Walker scrambled a half-dozen eggs and cut thick slices from a loaf of bread. He shoved the doctor's desk in the front office almost to the examining room's door so that they could eat and still see Nell.
The food was cold before Lacy washed her hands and sat down, but neither of them noticed. They ate in silence. Without asking, Walker stood and refilled her coffee, then pulled his chair closer to her so he wouldn't have to raise his voice.
"We have to talk," he began while she sweetened her cup. "Carter and I have a strategy."
Lacy raised one eyebrow.
"All right, I had a plan after seeing Carter's place, but he agrees with me."
She drank her coffee, waiting for him to explain.
"Right now there is a good chance that whoever shot at Nell thought that they were killing you. Maybe they even think you are dead."
"Maybe," she echoed, following his reasoning.
"Whoever it was may not even know about Nell. After all, she came to town and as far as we know only a handful of people even noticed her. It was your buggy, your horse, and Nell bundled up in blankets could have passed for you driving."
"So what do we do?"
"First we get you out of town and let them wonder. It might not be a bad idea if the ambushers think they got away with killing you. They might even come to town to find out, and all they'll hear is that you seem to have vanished."
"All right." She surprised him by agreeing.
"Then you'll go with me to Fort Elliot?" It was the nearest fort and, once housed there, she'd be safe. "And Carter thinks we should get Nell away as fast as we can."
"I agree, Nell would be safer there, but I'm not going to the fort."
"You have to, Lacy."
"No," she answered as casually as if he'd offered more sugar. "I want to stay close to Nell. I agree I need to disappear, but not so far from home."
Walker thought about arguing, but Carter had already told him Lacy wouldn't consider the fort. "You'll be safer at Fort Elliot."
"I could go to the gypsies who live on the land behind Carter's. They mostly keep to themselves, but I think they'd let me cross their settlement that backs up to Carter's land."
Walker was one step ahead of her. "Carter and I talked about that. He agreed Bailee will want Nell back at their place to recover. So, at the same time we make you disappear, we have to get Nell to McKoy's. The doc's not set up here as a hospital. She'd be safer at Carter's."
Lacy nodded. "Once I'm at the gypsies, I could cross the trees and join you at Carter's place. Between Bailee and me, she'll have the best of care."
He leaned closer, touching her arm with his hand. "Getting you out of town shouldn't be all that difficult. Knowing the way my father never threw anything away, I think I may still have some old clothes in the storage room at the shop. We can dress you up like a boy and slip you out of town after dark tomorrow night. Anyone seeing you will just think a kid is heading home. Once you're on the road, I'll join you and provide escort."
Lacy frowned.
"It'll work. No problem. But the next step is getting Nell out. As soon as the doctor says it's safe, Carter plans to send his wagon to town with an old man who works for him named Samuel driving. He says Samuel comes to town for lumber all the time and drives so slow Nell will think she's still in her bed. They've probably already started building a sling that will fit in the bed of his wagon. We can put her in there, and she'll rock like a baby all the way."
Lacy didn't look like she was buying any part of the plan. "Why can't I ride with her?"
"We thought of that, but it would be risky. You're the one Whitaker wants. If someone did notice Samuel, or stop him on the road, he'd just explain that he was taking Nell, ill with a fever, to Bailee. That should keep anyone from getting close, but if you were in the wagon, it might draw more attention." Walker didn't want to add that whoever shot Nell might not hesitate to kill to get to Lacy.
"But, I—"
"Don't worry, the sheriff and I will stay in sight of the wagon the entire way. Carter said once we're on his land, he'll make sure the wagon isn't followed. Then I'll come back, wait until dark, and ride out again behind you dressed as a boy. Only, I agree, this time we take the south road to the gypsies' settlement."
The doc interrupted them as he tromped down the stairs, pulling his clothes on as he called, "How is she?"
"Better." Lacy stood. "But I want you to take a look at that shoulder."
Walker watched Lacy hurry off, no longer interested in his plan. An hour later, when they returned and sat down at the desk, the doctor surprised Walker by saying that he thought they should get the women out of town as fast as possible.
Now Lacy looked interested.
"Is it safe to move Nell?" Walker wanted to make sure.
"It won't be good for her," Timothy admitted. "But here in the center of town it will be impossible to keep her presence a secret for long. It's lucky that no one stopped by the office yesterday. As soon as word gets out, it's only a matter of time before the outlaws find out about her."
Dr. McClellan appeared to have given considerable thought to the problem. "Then they might come in to finish the job," he continued. "It would take several men to defend this place with a back door, two front doors, and windows easy to get to on the second floor. All anyone wanting Nell dead would have to do is set fire to the businesses on either side of the office. This whole block might go up in flames before we could get her out of my examining room."
Walker agreed.
"It's a risk to move her, but it may be the only way to keep her alive."
Walker stood. "If you'll keep an eye on her for a while, Doc, I'll see if I can't find Lacy some riding clothes." He offered Lacy his arm.
The doctor waved them away as he poured himself a cup of coffee and returned to Nell.
Ten minutes later, Walker pulled an old trunk from the back shelf of the storage closet. He carried it to Lacy's little office and sat it atop her desk, then decided to risk lighting one small lamp. "I think we'll find what we need in here." He pulled down the shade of the office door, even though it only led to the shop.
"This won't work." Lacy shook her head.
"Put all your hair up while I search." He half expected her to argue or complain about being ordered, but she must have been too tired.
Walker tried to make out each piece of clothing while he watched her bend and brush her hair into a bundle of curls atop her head. "I think this is one of my old shirts," he said when she straightened. "I was a few sizes smaller when I packed these." He noticed several moth holes, tossed it in the trash, and reached for another piece of clothing.
"Don't throw that away. I can cut some squares from it." Lacy shook her head like some kind of windup toy caught in a wind. She'd given up trying to get her hair to stay up in favor of examining the old shirt.
Walker resented her total lack of faith in his plan. He and Carter had it all thought out. "You're short, but you can wear the clothes of a fifteen-year-old boy. If we stick a hat on you, no one will know."
He tossed her a pair of trousers. "Put these on while I find a good shirt."
Giving her plenty of time to follow his first order, he tossed back a shirt without turning around and told her to put it on also. If she had to change with him present, the least he could do was be gentleman enough to keep his back to her.
He heard her grumble.
"It will work, Lacy!" he snapped, frustrated at her. "You can wear a boy's clothes for a few hours." He couldn't imagine that she'd be so uncooperative about changing into a man's clothes. She couldn't be so vain, or maybe she just hated his plan so much he'd have to drag her to safety.
When he turned around, she had her back to him. The pants he'd told her to wear were too big in the waist and tight across her hips, but once on a horse, no one would notice. She'd be fine. The shirt hung long from the shoulders and would cover up her waist and backside if left hanging out in back, so he saw no problem.
&nb
sp; 'Turn around."
She shook her head.
He leaned and put a hat on her head. 'Turn around, Lacy. So what if you look like a boy. I'm not going to laugh."
"No," she answered.
"Lacy, stop being a fool about looking like a boy. Turn around." He was too tired to continue this game.
She turned around. He didn't laugh. She didn't look like a boy.
For a moment all Walker could do was stare. The boy's shirt that had been too big at the shoulders didn't come together to button across her chest. As she breathed, he saw her cleavage between the cotton and the rounded swell of each breast. The shirt might only lack an inch closing, but it was a very important inch.
She tried to pull the shirt together, but it was useless.
There would be no hiding the fact that she was very much a woman.
"You're right." He admitted defeat. "No matter the clothes, you'll never look like a boy."
Her brown eyes rose to his, and to his surprise he saw no embarrassment in them. "I tried to tell you."
She laughed nervously, and he envied the cotton shirt that moved slightly over her body with each breath. "I may be short, but I'm a woman fully grown. I thought you knew that, Captain."
Walker saw no point in arguing. She was every inch a female, and somehow the boy's clothing made it even more obvious than her high-necked dress and wool vest. "I'll think of another plan."
"So, I can put my clothes back on?"
"Of course." If she stood there much longer, she'd probably catch cold.
"Captain?"
"Yes?"
'Turn around."
With great self-control, Walker followed orders.
CHAPTER 16
Lacy fought down a laugh. She'd finally made the captain speechless. She almost felt sorry for him. It occurred to her that maybe she should tell him that she'd never thought of herself as modest. But, after all, it wasn't as if he hadn't seen her before without her clothes.
Yet... if she didn't know better she would have sworn he must have forgotten she'd undressed before him once before. She felt the heat of his stare. The captain might be without a heart, but he wasn't dead.
"I'm finished." She buttoned the last button. "You can turn around now."
He did. Slowly.
"I tried to tell you back when you had the idea. Some women, even in men's clothes, don't look like men."
"I got the point." He stared directly at her face.
"Well, don't get mad about it. It's not my fault. My mother and grandmother were both well—"
"I understand," he said without allowing her to finish.
"You didn't have to expose yourself in front of a man to prove your point."
"I didn't expose myself in front of a man. You're my husband. We've been living together for a week. Surely you noticed that we aren't built the same."
He didn't look like he wanted to be reminded of it. He straightened as if at attention. "I'm also a man, and your behavior just now was inappropriate. An hour ago you didn't even want me touching your hair."
The captain was back, she thought; no human remained.
Anger fired in Lacy. "Inappropriate? I'm sorry, Captain, but I don't exactly know the rules here. Maybe you should explain them to me. I first thought a husband should act like a husband, but when I demanded that, you acted as if I'd made the request at gunpoint."
She paced her little office, three steps left, three steps right. "It's hard to treat you like a stranger when you're breathing down my neck. We're not friends, but until this is over, we can't survive as enemies."
He closed his arms over his chest as if waiting out a storm. He didn't plan to budge an inch, and he looked like he'd turn to dust before he admitted he was wrong about anything.
Lacy planted her fists on her hips and decided she could be just as headstrong. "You demand I follow orders like I joined your army and, when I question them, you look at me like you plan to have me shot at dawn as a deserter." She knew both their emotions were raw with all that had happened, but she couldn't stop herself.
She blew out the lamp, casting them into shadow. "You seem to be the one with all the experience and all the rules. I've never even been kissed, and in this state of married- with-no-husband, it looks like I'll never know what it's like. I've been married but never courted, and bedded but never loved."
She tossed him the clothes he'd demanded she try on. "I give up! I quit! Shoot me if you like! I don't want to be in your army anymore." She turned to leave, then whirled back to face him once more.
"And one last point. I didn't tell you never to touch my hair, I said not to touch me while I'm asleep, and if you can't figure out the difference, I've married the dumbest man in Texas. So do me a favor and go back to wherever you came from and never speak to me again."
Before he could answer, she shot out the door of the office and flew toward the back stairs. She heard him bumping into tables as he tried to follow in the dark, but she had no intention of turning around to help him. He was the most self-righteous man in the state. Maybe in the country. She didn't care if he fell over the printing press and died. How dare he proclaim her behavior inappropriate?
Lacy paused at the landing. What if he hurt the press? For one moment she thought of going back down, not to save Walker, but to protect the printing press.
In that hesitation, he caught her.
Before she could fight, he shoved her into the wall and pressed his body against hers, making her immobile in a fraction of a second.
Until now, she hadn't realized how strong he was, or how powerful. His entire body must have been honed for years as a fighting machine. He didn't need a knife or a gun, he could kill her with his bare hands.
She shook with fear. His forearm rested across her throat; one slight push, and he'd close her windpipe.
His warm breath brushed against her face as he fought to breathe. Then he said her name, low and angry. No matter how he was dressed, Lacy had no doubt a warrior's heart beat against her own.
A sob escaped before she could bite her lip and stop it.
A moment later, he stepped away as though her nearness had burned him.
She almost slid to the floor in relief. She wasn't sure if he'd been about to hold her or hurt her, and what frightened her even more was that she didn't think he knew either.
She saw his outline on the other side of the landing, only a few feet away. He'd braced his hands wide apart on the railing and took deep breaths as if he'd been fighting for his life.
Lacy didn't move. She didn't know where to go. The one person in this world who'd sworn to protect her had attacked her. Or had he?
Rubbing her arms, she felt no bruises. What if she had tried to fight back? Would he have only trapped her, or defended himself? What if, in his anger, he had hit her and not just caught her? Had he run to save her or catch her?
And the way he moved, she thought. The way he moved was too fast, too smooth not to have been practiced.
Suddenly she realized how cold it was in the shop. The fire had gone out downstairs, and she knew none still burned in the apartment. She'd left yesterday morning for the doctor's without her coat, and now the icy air seeped into her blood. But she didn't move. She wasn't sure what Walker would do. Just when she thought she was getting to know him, she realized how much of a stranger he was.
To her surprise, he faced her. His hard, powerful muscles were now tightly under control as his body stretched tall and straight as if facing a court.
"My action, madam, was inexcusable." The aloof manners returned without emotions, as if he'd practiced them over and over. "I only meant to catch up to you, not grab you."
Her husband was colder than the night. He couldn't use the reasoning that he was trying to help her like he did last time when he'd held her. She was thankful he didn't try. Anger had driven him this time, she reasoned, nothing more. And for her no-hearted husband, the loss of his temper was a flaw.
Lacy tried to stop her te
eth from chattering as she slowly gained control of her own emotions. "You frightened me."
"It is with deepest regret I—"
She didn't want to hear the stiff formal talk of an officer, she wanted to hear him be a man, but she wasn't sure there was one left inside the soldier. "Stop calling me madam."
"If you wish." He wouldn't come out from behind his invisible wall.
"Since when has any of this been as I wish?" She climbed the steps, aware that he followed, but not too closely this time.
They went into the apartment, and he waited as she packed a few things in her tattered carpetbag and put on her new navy coat. Then, without a word, she prepared to leave her home, not knowing when she'd return. She didn't care what the captain's plan was, she had a plan of her own. She would stay with Nell, and somehow they'd get to Carter and Bailee's place. There she'd be safe, and she'd tell Walker he could go back to being a soldier forever. She wanted to stay at home and work, but she'd give that all up if he would forget this duty he seemed to think he had toward her. The only chance that might happen would be if she could prove that she was safe on her on.
As she gathered a few quilts and her tablet from the kitchen table, Walker lifted her bag and waited for her at the back door. He accepted each bundle she wrapped, never once commenting on how much she took.
They crossed the alley and entered the doctor's office just as dawn grayed the sky.
"Glad you're back, Miss Lacy," Timothy greeted her without seeming to notice the soldier standing in front of her. "I want you to take a look at something."
Lacy didn't say a word to Walker as she stepped around him and followed the doctor. It crossed her mind that life would have been so much better if she'd married a man like Timothy McClellan. He was kind and soft-spoken. He always asked, never told. She could have been a great help to him, and maybe he would have cherished her. There was no fire burning beneath the surface with the doctor, no bottled-up anger that threatened to explode, no hidden warrior ready to attack.
Blinking away the tears, Lacy realized all she'd ever wanted in this life was to be cherished. Not someone's duty or responsibility. She wanted to be of some value. Because Walker's father had treated her so, she'd thought Walker would also when he finally came home. But she'd been wrong.