Harbor Lights

by Sherryl Woods

  “Surrounded by the likes of you?” he joked, to lighten the moment.

  She tickled Davy. “Hey, I’m the best aunt in the whole wide world, right, Davy?”

  “Best,” he confirmed, nodding emphatically.

  “There, I told you so,” she said, standing and then handing Davy back to him. “Come home and have dinner with us.”

  He shook his head. “Not today. Maybe next week. I still have thinking to do.”

  “Well, don’t think so hard that your head explodes,” she teased.

  “I’ll try not to.”

  Bree gave him a kiss, then peppered Davy’s face with butterfly kisses before leaping back onto the dock. “Love you two.”

  “We love you, too,” Kevin acknowledged. “Even if you are a pest.”

  “But I’m a smart pest,” she retorted.

  He watched her go, then thought about what she’d said. Cutting Shanna out of his life out of guilt really was absurd. If things between them were so intense, wasn’t that precisely the reason to embrace the relationship, not use it as an excuse to back off?

  He wondered if it was too late to tell Shanna he’d been an idiot. Then, again, didn’t most women live for just such an admission? He’d probably make her day.

  It was nearly ten days before Kevin worked up the courage to drop by the bookstore. He had no idea what sort of reception to expect. He just knew that the separation wasn’t working for him. He’d also had plenty of time on the drives to and from Annapolis to think about Bree’s assessment of the situation with Shanna, to say nothing of her opinions when it came to his relationship with Georgia.

  It was certainly true that his feelings for Shanna had grown deeper bit by bit. Especially after the misery of this separation, he didn’t want to go through another day without spending time with her. She was a real flesh-and-blood woman, not like the idealized image he’d been clinging to of Georgia.

  Bree had all but dared him to take a hard look at his marriage. She’d forced him to see what had been there all along. Caught up in the intensity of a war, he and Georgia had rushed into getting married because of pure lust and a frantic need for connection to another person. Maybe with enough time, they could have really gotten to know each other on another level, but that hadn’t happened. Turning their marriage into some romantic fairy tale was revising history.

  Not that Georgia hadn’t been a good person and a beautiful woman. She had been. But when she’d gone back to Iraq, leaving him behind with Davy, he’d called it dedication to duty for the benefit of anyone who’d questioned the decision, but to himself he’d acknowledged that she was addicted to the adrenaline rush. She loved being a soldier, and the more challenging the situation, the happier she was. Sooner or later, they would have had to face the truth—that they wanted a different future. She might have tried, but she never would have fully embraced the kind of quiet life he wanted for himself and his family.

  In fact, he’d found exactly that kind of life right here in Chesapeake Shores. He enjoyed the slow-paced lifestyle and his new work with his uncle. And his sisters might pester him outrageously, but he loved them to pieces. He adored Gram. Even his encounters with Mick, and especially with Megan, were taking on a new tenor. It was a great environment in which to raise his son.

  And then there was Shanna. She was steady as a rock, as enamored of Chesapeake Shores as he was. She doted on Davy. And she got to him with those big eyes, that ready smile and a touch that made his blood go from simmer to boil in a heartbeat. He could see himself with her. It was time he admitted all of that to her.

  That evening he appeared at the shop, deliberately choosing to arrive as she was closing up so they were unlikely to be interrupted.

  “Let’s have dinner,” he suggested without preamble.

  “Excuse me?” She didn’t seem impressed by the last-minute invitation.

  “Come on,” he coaxed. “We can take a drive, find someplace romantic on the water.”

  There was a flicker of alarm in her eyes, but something more, too. A longing, if he wasn’t mistaken.

  “What’s changed?” she asked, her hesitation plain.

  “I’ll explain over dinner. If I try to do it here and now, we’ll be here till breakfast.”

  She studied him for a full minute, then nodded. “Okay, sure,” she said. “Is there something in particular on your mind?”

  He nodded. “You. Pretty much all the time.”

  There was a flicker of hope in her eyes. “I see.”

  He was tempted to just explain there and then, lay his cards on the table and beg for forgiveness. But before he could, the door to the shop opened and an unfamiliar woman walked in. There was a boy, maybe six or seven, clinging to her hand. He saw recognition flash in Shanna’s eyes, even as all the color drained out of her face.

  “Hello, Shanna,” the older woman said stiffly.

  The little boy looked up at her, his expression guarded. She dropped to her knees a few feet in front of him. “Hi, Henry,” she whispered, her voice shaky, tears on her cheeks. Then she opened her arms and, after what seemed an endless hesitation, he ran to her.

  “Mommy,” he cried, his arms tight around her neck.

  Kevin stared at them, shock spreading through him. She had a child? One she’d never so much as mentioned? One she’d obviously left in someone else’s care? Memories of his own mother walking away from her family spilled through him. The ache he’d felt each time she’d flitted into their lives for one of her visits, then left again. And then there was Georgia, who’d chosen her country over her child, an admirable decision perhaps, but one with tragic consequences. Was he doomed to being surrounded by women whose priorities were all screwed up, at least by his standards?

  In an instant, everything he knew—or thought he knew—about Shanna was turned upside down. Without a word, he walked out of the bookstore and left her to her reunion, cursing himself yet again for being a damn fool.

  Shanna was aware of the shock that registered on Kevin’s face right before he turned on his heel and walked out of the bookstore, but with Henry clinging to her and Mrs. Hamilton waiting, she didn’t dare run after him. Besides, this moment was too sweet, too long in coming, for her not to savor every second of it.

  The boy she loved was actually here, in her arms. He’d grown since she’d last seen him. His hair was streaked blond from playing outdoors in the summer sun, and there were freckles across his nose. His skinny little arms were tight around her.

  “I am so glad you’re here,” she told him again and again, lifting her gaze to include Greg’s mother. Mrs. Hamilton might not be her favorite person, but right this second Shanna adored her for bringing Henry here.

  When Henry finally released her, he looked around, his eyes alight with curiosity. “Your store is really cool. Can I check it out?”

  “Of course,” she said at once. “You pick out some books you’d like, and your grandmother and I can have a chat.” She turned to Greg’s mother, noted the weariness in her eyes, the resignation in her expression. “Can I get you some tea? Or coffee?”

  “I’ll have tea if it’s not too much trouble.”

  “No trouble at all,” Shanna assured her. “Earl Grey?”

  She seemed startled that Shanna had remembered her favorite. “Yes, please.”

  Shanna busied herself in the back room pouring the hot water and brewing the tea, all the while trying to imagine what on earth Mrs. Hamilton and Henry were doing here. Not that it mattered, as long as she was able to spend even a little time with Henry.

  She returned to the main room and found her former mother-in-law seated in the children’s section watching Henry with a mix of adoration and sorrow. Oblivious to her mood, he was pulling books off the shelves and chattering about the ones that were his favorites and those he wanted to read. In that moment, Shanna was reminded sharply of just how much he truly was an older version of Davy.

  She handed Mrs. Hamilton her tea and settled on the edge of the
chair across from her. “I really am glad you came,” she said simply. Her gaze wandered toward Henry. “I’ve missed him so much.”

  “He’s missed you, as well,” Mrs. Hamilton said. She hesitated, looking as if she was still undecided about something. Eventually she said, “Could we speak privately? In the back room, perhaps?”

  “Of course.” Shanna paused long enough to ruffle Henry’s already tousled hair. “We’ll be right back, sweetie.”

  “Okay,” he said, barely giving her a glance as he chose a pile of books he wanted to read.

  In the back, Shanna gestured toward the more comfortable chair at her desk, then drew up a stool. “Is everything okay?”

  Tears welled up in the older woman’s eyes. “No. Greg isn’t recovering the way we’d all hoped. There’s been damage to his liver.”

  “I’m truly sorry,” Shanna told her, reaching for her hand. “I mean that.”

  Mrs. Hamilton looked startled, either by her touch or by the sincerity behind her words. “I actually believe you do.”

  “I tried so hard to convince him to get help,” she said. “He didn’t think he had a problem.” Though she managed to keep an accusing note out of her voice, she added, “Neither did you.

  “His father and I just didn’t want to accept it. I suppose we were even a bit embarrassed that it took someone like you to point out that our own son was in trouble. People in our social circle have a few cocktails. We assumed Greg was the same.”

  Shanna tried not to take offense at the someone like you comment. Apparently, though, Mrs. Hamilton realized how she’d sounded.

  “I didn’t intend for that to sound so demeaning,” she said, her tone genuinely apologetic. “I just meant that you hardly knew Greg, yet you saw the problem.”

  “You’re his parents. You didn’t want to see it,” Shanna said, able to be more generous in her opinion now that she had some distance from the volatile situation. “I didn’t want to acknowledge it at first, either.”

  “Well, I’m sorry for how we reacted when you came to us,” she said. “Especially now that I’ve come to ask you for a favor.”

  Shanna regarded her with surprise. “What can I do?”

  “Look out for Henry,” she said. “He’s not happy with us. His grandfather and I are too old to keep up with an energetic young boy. There are no children his age living nearby. I’m afraid the situation is only going to get more difficult. Greg will be coming to our house. We’re hoping he’ll improve, but he might not. At this point, he’s not a candidate for a transplant apparently, so there’s no telling what will happen. Henry shouldn’t have to live with that kind of uncertainty.”

  Shanna hardly dared to hope she was understanding correctly. “Do you want me to be his guardian? A temporary foster mother? Would you let me adopt him?” The possibilities tumbled out.

  The questions seemed to fluster Mrs. Hamilton. “We haven’t discussed the legalities among ourselves, though I know we must. I was so anxious to talk to you that I just got in the car with Henry and drove here.”

  Shanna desperately wanted clarity, but under the circumstances maybe she couldn’t expect it, much less demand it.

  “Why don’t we consider this an extended visit, at least until school starts?” Shanna suggested. “That way Henry won’t get his hopes up that he’s going to live here permanently, and you all will have time to decide what kind of long-term arrangement would be for the best.”

  Mrs. Hamilton regarded her with amazement. “You’re being very generous under the circumstances. I thought you might turn us down after what happened at the custody hearing.”

  “All I care about, all I’ve ever cared about, is what’s best for Henry. I love him. If I can do anything to make things easier for him, either temporarily or permanently, I will.” She said it without hesitation and with no thought at all to the toll it would take if she had to let him go again.

  “I’d want it understood that he’ll come home frequently to see his father if the situation allows for that.”

  “Absolutely,” Shanna said at once.

  Mrs. Hamilton hesitated. “You have room for him? It won’t be an inconvenience?”

  “I have a two-bedroom apartment right upstairs. You can see it now, if you’d like to. I can fix the second room up for him.”

  “You have your store, though. Will you be able to manage that and having a young boy with you?”

  “Are you trying to discourage me?”

  “No, I’m just being practical,” Mrs. Hamilton insisted.

  “Well, like I said, the apartment is right upstairs. Henry can come here during the day, or I’ll arrange for him to spend time with some other children his age.”

  “Day care?” Mrs. Hamilton asked, her expression horrified.

  Shanna nearly laughed at her reaction. “I have a friend with twin girls who are Henry’s age. She has a nanny who looks out for them and for her nephew. I’m sure they’d be delighted to include Henry from time to time.” Assuming Kevin didn’t flatly veto it, she thought, knowing how upset he’d been when he left earlier.

  “I wouldn’t have expected families in a little town like this to have nannies,” Greg’s mother said, sounding every bit the society snob.

  “Actually Abby is an extremely successful Wall Street stockbroker who’s now running the Baltimore office of her brokerage company. Her fiancé is a graphic designer with an impressive client list of major companies. Her father is the architect who designed this town and many others across the country.”

  Mrs. Hamilton looked taken aback. “I have to admit I’m surprised and impressed.”

  “You should drive around a bit before you go home. I think you’ll discover that it’s a wonderful little town. Henry will have a great time while he’s here.”

  “He’ll be with someone who loves him. That’s the only thing I care about,” Mrs. Hamilton said.

  “Were you planning to leave him with me today?” Shanna asked, hardly daring to hope for that.

  “No,” she admitted, looking flustered. “I drove down here on an impulse. I suppose I wanted to take a look around before making a final decision. I’ll speak to my husband and Greg tonight.”

  At Shanna’s suddenly defeated expression, she soothed, “Not to worry. They’ll agree that this is for the best, I’ll see to that. Why don’t I bring Henry back on Friday? Will that work for you?”

  It took everything in Shanna to contain her desire to utter a whoop of pure joy. “Friday would be great. It’ll give me time to fix up his room.”

  Mrs. Hamilton put aside her cup. She’d barely sipped her tea. Shanna suspected it had merely been a prop to steady her nerves.

  Shanna stood when she did and was shocked when Mrs. Hamilton gave her an awkward hug.

  “Thank you for agreeing to this,” she told Shanna. “I know I had no right to ask.”

  “When it comes to Henry, you will always have a right to ask anything of me,” Shanna assured her. “Shall we tell him now?”

  “If it’s okay, let me be the one to tell him,” Mrs. Hamilton said. “I’d like to wait until I’ve spoken to his father and grandfather.” Her lips curved slightly. “And it will be nice to be the one giving him the best possible news for a change. He’s going to be very excited about this. He’s been asking for you ever since he moved into my house. As for Greta—” she gave a little shake of her head “—I swear that woman sings your praises from morning till night. If it would be a help, I’ll send her down here. I’d pay for her to have her own place.”

  Shanna regarded her with amazement. “It would certainly be less disruptive for Henry to have that consistency. Are you sure?”

  “Well, I can’t very well put the woman out of a job after all she’s done for the boy, can I?” Mrs. Hamilton said. “I’ll make the arrangements.”

  “Thank you.”

  Back in the front room, Henry had winnowed his stack of books down to three that he absolutely had to have. “Is that too many?” he asked w
orriedly.

  “Absolutely not,” Shanna said.

  He gave her a wistful look. “I wish you could read them with me.”

  “Me, too,” she said, barely resisting the urge to tell him that she would do exactly that in just a few more days. She owed Mrs. Hamilton the chance to be the one to tell him. She knew exactly what it was costing her to make this decision for Henry’s sake.

  She put the books in a bag, then walked outside with Henry and his grandmother. She knelt down and gave Henry a fierce hug. “I love you.”

  This time, with his face buried in her neck, she heard him murmur the words, “I love you, too.”

  Surprisingly, when she stood, she realized that the perpetual ache in her heart, which had been there since the divorce, was finally gone. It had been replaced, miraculously, by hope.

  21

  Grateful that some of the big box stores were within an hour’s drive of Chesapeake Shores, Shanna left immediately after closing the shop to pick up everything she thought she might need to decorate a little boy’s room. She’d already put aside several more of the books Henry had been looking at. She would put those beside his bed. Though she wondered if she should wait for a final word from Mrs. Hamilton, she couldn’t seem to stop herself from preparing for Henry’s visit as if it were a done deal.

  By the time she got back home at ten, she’d ordered a twin bed and matching dresser, which required assembly, then picked out sunny yellow paint, sheets and towels, a lamp with a sports theme and posters of his favorite baseball and football teams for the walls. Those were the things she remembered from his room at home. She would have bought even more, but when she was about to go completely overboard, she’d decided Henry should have a say in choosing the remaining items for his new room.

  Back home, far too excited to sleep, she stayed up past midnight to put a first coat of paint on the bedroom walls. With only a few days until Henry would most likely be here for an extended visit of at least a month, she wanted everything to be perfect.

  In the morning, the boxes with the bed and dresser were delivered just as Mick O’Brien was exiting his car and heading toward Sally’s. He immediately detoured in her direction and gestured toward the boxes being carried inside.