The Affair

by Amanda Brooke

  ‘Would you ladies like more drinks?’ Bryn asked, looking at their empty glasses. ‘More champagne? Or how about one of Charlotte’s cocktails?’

  Despite feeling a little woozy, Vikki would happily have kept going, but she didn’t want to appear too gauche and embarrass herself in front of Sarah, or let Rob down. ‘Maybe I’ll have a soft drink instead.’

  Nina saw through the act. ‘She wants a cocktail, and so do I.’

  ‘What’s this?’ Sarah asked when she spotted the two alone and without drinks. ‘Have you drunk the bar dry so soon, Nina?’

  ‘Bryn’s getting us cocktails.’

  ‘Oh good Lord,’ Sarah said to Vikki, ‘she’ll be queen of the dance floor after a couple of those.’

  Nina laughed. ‘I’ll have you know I have some serious moves.’

  ‘So there really is a dance floor? I thought Charlotte was joking,’ Vikki said.

  ‘It’s in the next room. We don’t fire it up until the food has been cleared away. We can’t have guests slipping on escapee blinis.’

  ‘I haven’t been dancing since Freya was born.’

  ‘You must have had her very young,’ Nina said.

  ‘Yes, I suppose I was. I remember being heavily pregnant at my twenty-first party,’ Vikki said as she recalled what had been a sober and distinctly sombre event. She hadn’t been able to compete with some of the wild parties her peers were having and was so out of touch with them all that she doubted anyone would come if she had invited them. So instead she had gone out for a meal with her mum and her husband, and tried to ignore the empty chair her dad should have occupied.

  ‘So how did you meet Rob?’ Nina asked.

  From the way Nina averted her eyes, Vikki guessed at the follow-up question she was too polite to ask. Had they met at school? It wouldn’t be the first time the suggestion had been made and she could reel off the answer without even thinking. ‘I was in sixth form when Rob started at Sedgefield High, but it was only after I’d left that we got to know each other. I worked in an estate agents and he was looking for a house. The rest is history.’

  ‘It must have been weird to begin with, though,’ Sarah said. ‘Dating your teacher.’

  ‘Not really,’ Vikki said. ‘Sedgefield was his first teaching position and he wasn’t that far off being a student himself.’

  ‘Not that you were dating him back then anyway,’ Nina reminded her.

  ‘But it does happen, doesn’t it?’ Sarah said. She was looking over at the crowd of youngsters at the bar. Charlotte and her friends were being circled by an older group of men who were more interested in watching the girls than trying to catch the bartender’s attention. ‘They’re like bees to a honeypot.’

  ‘That’s no excuse,’ Nina said, surprisingly soberly. ‘However sweet the honey, they’re still children.’

  ‘Exactly,’ Sarah said.

  Bryn arrived a moment later with their cocktails: exotic concoctions laden with fruit and glowing in the dim light.

  ‘How’s Scarlett doing?’ Nina asked.

  ‘I might have suggested she try a mocktail next.’

  ‘I thought I saw her give you a funny look,’ Sarah said.

  Bryn gave an apologetic shrug to his wife. ‘I did try.’

  After their cocktails, Sarah announced that the dance floor was open. Vikki tried and failed to persuade Rob to join her, but she was more than happy when Nina took pity on her and offered to be her dancing partner. It came as a shock when the lights were turned up as midnight approached and guests were instructed to go out into the garden to count down to the end of one year and the beginning of the next.

  The dancing had sobered Vikki up and she separated from Nina as they each went in search of their partners before the firework display started. Sarah had thought of everything and there were piles of blankets and fleeces for those guests who might need protection from the deep frost that had made the snow crunch underfoot. Vikki grabbed a thick woollen wrap at the same time that Bryn was reaching for the pile.

  ‘Your wife’s looking for you,’ she said.

  ‘If you see her, tell her I’m over with Scarlett by the water fountain.’

  Vikki watched him push through the crowd to a spot where she glanced the top of the young girl’s head. Vikki had never heard Rob mention her, but she was someone you would most certainly notice. Her violet eyes were startling and Vikki had felt almost intimidated by her beauty. She had been surprised when Nina had told her she was only fifteen. She had an air about her that seemed much older, or at least she had at the beginning of the evening. The crowds had parted and Vikki could see that Scarlett was decidedly worse for wear. Bryn draped a blanket around her and Scarlett buried her head into his shoulder.

  ‘Those two worry me.’

  Vikki turned to see the anxiety etched on Sarah’s face. ‘Sorry?’

  The shadow passed. ‘Oh, nothing. Come on, do you want to help set off the fireworks?’

  ‘I’d better find Rob first.’

  ‘We’ll be on a raised platform. He’ll see you before you see him.’

  And so it was that Vikki found herself at the epicentre of the New Year’s Eve party hosted by the woman whose name she had been loath to speak in recent months. As they counted down from ten, Vikki was preparing to see in the New Year without her husband, but suddenly he was there, slipping an arm around her waist. The crowd shouted down to one and she held out a safety lighter to set off her section of fireworks. Shivering, her hand shook so badly that she couldn’t keep the glowing ember on the fuse until Rob put his hand on hers and stilled her body with the warmth of his own. As the night sky was set alight she turned and kissed him.

  ‘This is going to be such an amazing year, Vikki,’ he said.

  Scarlett

  In case you haven’t worked it out yet, I’m good at keeping secrets. You should also know I’m good at telling lies. I suppose that’s why Mum’s gone a bit crazy. She was convinced she had everything under control. Liam was being normal for a change and she thought I was still young enough to be ordered around. OK, so she saw how drunk I was at the New Year’s Eve party, but it’s not like she wasn’t expecting it. That’s what teenagers do, isn’t it? The thing is, she didn’t have a clue what else I was up to, even though it happened right under her nose. I just wish things could have carried on like that, so no one got hurt.

  I suppose now you want to know what I did get up to at the party, don’t you? Well, Charlotte had been in charge of ordering the cocktails and the barman was one of her old school friends. She’d come up with a new recipe which she called the Tavistock Molotov cocktail. Yes, it’s hard to say, but that was the point. You could only have one if you were capable of asking for it.

  Eventually, we couldn’t, so Charlotte invited us all up to her room. I was glad to get away. I was still a bit in shock after what happened on Christmas Day. I wasn’t sure whether I should be angry, sad, or ashamed. Mostly, I just wanted to cry. I hated him, and not because of what he got me to do, it was the way he made me feel. It wasn’t like he forced me or anything. I didn’t say no. I did exactly what he told me to, and afterwards I was so confused. He’d always been really gentle before. He showed me how to do things, stuff that we both liked, and that’s what I’d wanted from him. It was Christmas, for fuck’s sake! Why was it so bad for me to want to spend some time alone with him? Why did he have to be such a prick? Like, I was ready to give myself to him, but I ended up feeling used. How does that work?

  I didn’t understand and I had no one to talk to. I wouldn’t speak to him. I didn’t even want to look at him. I felt sick, knowing he was downstairs at the party, pretending to be in love with someone else – and he didn’t love her, he told me. Charlotte and her friends were starting to get on my nerves too, talking about which of the men there they would and wouldn’t do it with. They talked about him and tried to embarrass me, so I got up and left. I didn’t exactly go looking for him, but he found me anyway.

  I’d gone o
utside to the summerhouse I used to play in when I was little. Sarah had a new, posh one built, so the old one had been moved to an unused part of the garden, and it was a bit tricky getting there because it was so icy and I was drunk. I left a pretty good trail for him to follow, though.

  The wooden hut smelled of musty garden furniture and I collapsed on to a chair. I was absolutely freezing, but that wasn’t the only reason I was trembling.

  He appeared at the door, stepping inside just enough so no one would see him and said, ‘You’re not speaking to me.’

  I glared at him and sniffed the air as if there was a bad smell under my nose. I didn’t say anything though. I was keeping my mouth closed this time.

  ‘You’re angry.’

  I carried on scowling.

  ‘Scarlett, answer me.’

  ‘What do you expect?’

  ‘What I expect is for you to be more mature about it, if I’m honest.’

  I could feel tears stinging my eyes, but I wasn’t going to cry. ‘You used me.’

  ‘And you use me, Scarlett, all the time.’ He let out a long sigh. ‘I’ll admit I was angry. I didn’t appreciate being blackmailed.’

  ‘I didn’t blackmail you!’

  ‘You wanted to get me jealous and it worked. I didn’t want you going off with some boy. I thought I could trust you.’

  ‘Meanwhile, I have to put up with you sleeping with you-know-who every night.’

  ‘I know, I know,’ he whispered. He moved closer and knelt down in front of me, like he was begging for forgiveness. ‘Would it help if I said we don’t have sex that much these days? I want to save myself for you, but we don’t always get what we want and maybe that’s how it’s meant to be for us. We have our own lives, Scarlett, and a responsibility to keep other people happy. They’ve done nothing wrong.’

  ‘But neither have we.’

  ‘I know,’ he said. ‘Look, we were meant to be, and there was nothing either of us could do to stop this from happening, but that’s not how other people will see it. We have to keep this completely separate from the other parts of our lives. It’s the only way.’

  As apologies went, this wasn’t exactly what I wanted to hear. ‘Forever?’ I asked.

  ‘Can’t we simply make the most of what we have? Take it one day at a time?’

  As he talked, he placed his hands on my knees, which I’d pressed tightly together. I wasn’t going to make this easy for him. ‘But I hardly get to see you.’

  ‘You see me all the time.’

  ‘Not properly.’

  ‘Doesn’t that excite you, though, Scarlett?

  He trailed a warm finger across my thigh and then slipped his hand beneath the hem of my lace dress, but only just. He wasn’t making demands. He knew he wouldn’t get away with it a second time.

  ‘It’s not enough,’ I said.

  His hand had stopped moving and that’s when I began to panic. I thought I’d pushed him too far and I was so scared he was about to say we should end it. I didn’t want to finish with him, not then, not ever. It would break my heart.

  ‘Are you still angry with me, Scarlett?’

  I knew I had to think fast, but even though the cold had shocked some sense into me, I wasn’t exactly sober. I really wanted to teach him a lesson but I was terrified that if I pushed him away, it would be forever. Why does love have to be so frightening all the time? It’s not supposed to be like that, is it?

  ‘Scarlett,’ he said. ‘Tell me you forgive me.’

  His hand was still resting on my thigh, but he wasn’t touching me, not the way I wanted.

  ‘Of course I do. I love you,’ I said.

  ‘Will you let me make it up to you?’

  ‘How?’

  ‘Last time we met, all the pleasure was mine, and now it’s your turn,’ he said with a smile as he began to relax. It took both his hands to pull my thighs apart. ‘We might not be able to spend as much time on our own as we’d like, but we’re going to make every moment count. This is going to be the best year ever.’

  17

  The Accusations

  After Scarlett had stormed out, Nina was left paralysed by an intense fear that not only affected her movement, but her ability to think, or at least her ability to think rationally. She didn’t know what to believe or who to trust. Scarlett’s words were worthless, given how many lies she had told over the last … the last what? Six months? A year? Whoever had been coaching her had trained her well.

  Fifteen minutes after Scarlett had gone to school, Bryn returned downstairs carrying a holdall. She should have told him to stay. No, she should have begged him to stay, but instead she waited for Bryn to speak first. She searched her husband’s face as if it were a route map that would lead her through the lies to the truth, but she was already lost.

  Bryn shook his head. ‘I was ready to step up, Nina. I would have done anything to help you and Scarlett through this, but you’re on your own now. Good luck.’

  Nina didn’t stop him. She didn’t say a word and when he left, she was utterly and completely alone.

  Staring at the phone, she considered calling the police. Scarlett was underage and she had been sleeping with a man who was married and therefore old enough to know that what he was doing was wrong, even if her daughter didn’t. But she hadn’t named her mystery man and Nina doubted that the police would fare any better dragging the truth from her. Even after witnessing her family being torn apart, Scarlett had been determined to protect the bastard. How could she do that? Why?

  For one person in particular, the answer was obvious.

  ‘Oh, Sarah, what have I done?’

  Sarah’s sigh down the phone line told Nina that she wasn’t that surprised by the news Nina had just imparted. ‘You’ve done the right thing,’ she said.

  ‘But Scarlett … she says it isn’t Bryn. What if I’ve made a terrible mistake?’

  ‘Wouldn’t you rather that than risk him staying under your roof so he can continue the abuse? Yes, it’s going to be awful if it turns out not to be Bryn, but while there’s a chance you’re right,’ Sarah said, ‘your conscience is clear.’

  ‘How can my conscience be clear if it’s me who let this happen? I’ll never forgive myself.’

  ‘It wasn’t only Scarlett he was grooming, though, was it? These men are expert manipulators, and they start with the mothers.’

  ‘I shouldn’t have let things move so fast,’ Nina said, her voice wavering. ‘I should have waited until I knew Bryn well enough to be absolutely sure I could trust him with my children.’

  ‘You were blinded by love,’ Sarah said kindly, ‘and I didn’t exactly figure out what Bryn was planning either. I was convinced he was looking for a meal ticket – a man with a track record of losing money meets a divorcée with her own business, her own house. She showers him with gifts while all he can manage is a bunch of flowers from the local garage. She pays for the wedding, buys him a new wardrobe, and suddenly he’s doing pretty well for himself.’

  ‘It wasn’t like that.’

  ‘It wasn’t far off,’ Sarah said, having long forgotten any promise to give Bryn the benefit of the doubt. ‘And, with hindsight, did it really make sense for a man who has fallen out with his own daughter to get along so well with Scarlett? What if he had been doing the same thing to her? I should have spoken up sooner.’

  ‘I wouldn’t have listened.’

  ‘It’s not your fault, Nina. Let’s just concentrate on making this right. Have you decided what to do next? Do you need me to come over?’

  ‘No, it’s OK. I’m going to freshen up and head over to the school. I’d like their advice before going to the police.’

  ‘I did ask Vikki to speak to Rob, see if he’s had any hints from Scarlett, but she hasn’t got back to me yet.’

  Nina didn’t hesitate in voicing her next suspicion. She was getting used to it. ‘Has it crossed your mind that it might be him? He’s Scarlett’s form tutor; he’s given her extra lessons outside sc
hool; and he’s nearer Scarlett’s age than Bryn.’

  ‘Since when did age stop men of a certain disposition from being interested in young girls?’ Sarah sighed, then added, ‘I know you’d rather believe it was anyone except Bryn, but you’re clutching at straws. What we really need is for Scarlett to put you out of your misery and name him. That girl of yours has a lot to answer for. I swear you have more patience than I do, Nina. I would have throttled the answer out of her by now.’

  ‘It might still come to that,’ Nina said, realizing there was more truth to that statement than she would have liked.

  After ending the call, Nina went straight to Scarlett’s room.

  The blinds were drawn, the bed unmade, and Nina spent a full minute staring as if it were a window into her daughter’s life. All she needed was that one key that would unlock Scarlett’s secrets. What that key might look like, she didn’t know, but she set about finding it.

  At first, she was respectful of her daughter’s possessions, but as she searched, she replayed the morning’s events in her mind. Scarlett had seen Bryn as he prepared to walk out of her life and one of two things had been going through her mind. She could have been looking to her lover to confess all and face the consequences, before silently acquiescing to his decision to let Nina’s torment continue. Alternatively, Scarlett might have been watching an innocent man being accused and her mother’s marriage disintegrating before her eyes, and then done nothing to stop it. The second scenario might be the lesser of two evils, but it was no less palatable. Scarlett was a victim, Nina knew that, but it wasn’t enough to dampen her anger at how far her daughter was willing to go to protect her abuser.

  Within minutes the bedroom was a mess. The bedclothes had been pulled off the bed and the mattress turned over. Drawers had been pulled open and their contents scattered across the floor. A jewellery box had been emptied, along with a couple of makeup bags. School books had been rifled through as she searched in vain for doodles of Scarlett’s initials entwined with those of the man who had got her pregnant. What she did find was her daughter’s stash of contraceptive pills, which Nina took into the bathroom and flushed away.