Out of The Box Regifted

by Jennifer Theriot

  ‘Deep breaths Olivia, just breathe deep and take the high road’, my inner goddess is urging me. I nod to the empty seats across from me. “Well, I guess not. Please, sit.”

  “Damn, what a friggin rock you’ve got there. It’s beautiful. So, when are you getting married?” Kelly asks.

  “Well, I only just got engaged on my birthday, so no, not getting married just yet. Plus you forget I just got divorced.” I coolly remind her.

  Looking hurt, Alan remarks, “I wonder why no one told me, Olivia. I would have thought one of the kids would have at least called me.”

  My inner goddess manages to plant a smirk on my face. “Pfft! There’s really no reason why they would have told you, Alan. My life really doesn’t concern you anymore hon.” I point at Kelly, noticing her baby bump. “So how are things with the two of you? I guess you’ll be getting married soon?”

  “We do plan on it, but haven’t really decided on a date yet.” Alan responds, quite matter of factly.

  I shake my head and realize this answer is so typical of him. “Well, Alan you’ve got a baby in the oven, don’t you think you should get married before the blessed arrival?”

  Alan laughs, and I’m disgusted by his nonchalant tone, “Yeah Olivia, I guess that would be a good idea. I should probably make an honest woman out of her.” He gives Kelly a wink, which is nauseating. I try my best not to show any reaction, and find I’m really getting tired of this bullshit small talk. Tapping my nails on the table, I find I’m quickly running out of patience.

  He then has the audacity to ask, “How’s Lainey doing?”

  Now I’m fuming mad. Obviously he’s not in regular communication with his kids, which royally pisses me off. It seems like after the separation and divorce, Kelly has become his main focus. It’s sad because he and Lainey used to be so close. She was always Daddy’s little girl and could do no wrong in his eyes. He was much closer to her than he was with the boys, and it breaks my heart. My face is flush with anger, as I incredulously respond. “How’s Lainey? Seriously Alan? She’s your daughter. Why don’t you tell me how she is? No, I take that back you probably haven’t talked to her, or you wouldn’t be asking me, would you?”

  Embarrassed by my castigating him in front of Kelly, he answers defensively, “Not in a while. I’ve been traveling a lot, but I fully intend on calling her.” He leans back in his chair and takes a deep breath, trying to change the conversation. “It’s great that Dalton is back in the states, huh?” Kelly senses the tension between Alan and I, and excuses herself to go to the restroom. Taking advantage of her absence, in an attempt of an explanation, he takes a deep breath and looks contrite, “Look, Liv I never meant to hurt you. You do know that right?”

  Resentful at his attempt to placate me I respond, “Uhh, no I don’t Alan.” It’s all I can do to contain my feelings, and I guess he can sense it by the look on my face.

  “You’re still pretty bitter, I take it.”

  I take a sip of my coffee and look at him with contempt, “I’m not bitter Alan, I’ve just moved on from that time in my life. You sort of forced me to do that, in case you forgot. Too bad with our split, you don’t seem to give a shit about your own kids anymore. Pitiful Alan, just pitiful.” I’m peeved and I’m sure it’s evident on my face.

  “Ouch! I guess I deserved that, didn’t I?”

  “Yeah you did. You’re an asshole, but things have worked out for the best. I’m a totally different woman now, and I guess I can thank you for that. I’m actually happier now than I’ve ever been in my life.”

  Alan looks defeated, “Liv, I’m sorry that I couldn’t be that man for you.”

  “Don’t you dare tell me you’re sorry, Alan. Don’t insult me with your lame ass excuses. You’ve got a new life and are soon to be a daddy again, and that’s great.” I take advantage of the fact to rub it in. “Tell me about that Alan. Was it planned?” I coyly ask. I think I know the answer, but wait for him to respond.

  “No, totally not planned. Jesus, I’m gonna be a grandpa, and now I’m gonna be a dad again. Wasn’t prepared for it, you can believe that.” He quickly replies

  “So do you know if it’s a boy or a girl?” I ask.

  “Gonna be a girl. We just found out.”

  “Well that’s great. So you’ll be going to school functions, ballet recitals, being the protective dad on first dates and on and on. While I, on the other hand, will be traveling and enjoying my golden years. Ha-ha.” I just have to brag on that.

  “Yeah, I guess you will. Geez, I’ll be friggin 78 when she goes off to college. Hard to believe.”

  “Well, Alan I’m really happy for you and I wish you both many years of happiness. She does make you happy, doesn’t she? I just hope you don’t screw around on her, like you did me.”

  Not sure how to take my remark, he quickly responds. “Yes she does make me happy. She’s a wonderful woman and she’s a good person, Olivia.” I’m holding back tears, why I don’t know but I have to respond.

  “Well, Alan it’s good that she gives you what I couldn’t. Maybe you’ll keep your dick in your pants this time, and be faithful to her. If you have a decent bone left in your body, I’d suggest you keep in contact with your kids. You need to repair the relationship with them, but that’s just me. Just giving some friendly advice. I’d better get going. I’ve got lots of shopping to do, and Ash is expecting me home soon.” It’s all I can do to leave before Kelly gets back, but dammit she returns and gives me a hug. Are you friggin kidding me?

  Obviously clueless, she looks at me, smiling her disgustingly stupid blond moment smile. “Olivia, listen, take care. It was so good seeing you. I guess we’ll see you when Lainey has the baby. I can’t wait to go to Houston.” She giggles, and I want to throw up.

  My evil alter ego surfaces again, ‘I can play this game too you home wrecker bitch’. With a fake smile, I respond by taking her hand, “Well, I guess you will Kelly. Listen, you take care hon. It was so nice seeing you both.” Alan gives me a hug and my heart sinks. I can’t believe I’ve just seen the man I was married to for almost 30 years, with his pregnant girlfriend. In my overthinking way, he seems so attentive to her, and part of me envies that she's got what I never had. I do have a man who worships me, so why am I even thinking about this? Right now I’ve got to get away and FAST. I duck into the closest store I can find, which is a lingerie shop. ‘How totally fitting.’ I think to myself, as I browse the sexiest items in the store, and purchase what seems like every piece. I do need these for my trip, right? My heart is aching. I honestly don’t ache for Alan, but the newness of divorce still hasn’t left me yet. It’s going to take me awhile, but I’ll get there. I just need time. My phone signals a text, as I look at the screen. Thank God it’s from Ash. ‘Hey there sexy lady! Doing some financial damage to me? Sure hope so! Can’t wait to see your loot! ILY! AH, soon to be husband of OH!’

  I desperately needed that, and it makes me smile. He always knows the perfect time to text or call me. Immediately I return his text. ‘Yes my love! You are nearly bankrupt! You’ll be $orry you $ent me $hopping. Be home $oon! I’ll call you when I’m headed home. ILYB! $oon to be wife of financially ruined AH!’

  I make several other stops on my shopping spree, and think I should get something for Ash. What do you get a man who has everything? I decide to head back to Neiman’s. Thinking some kind of picture frame for the picture taken of us the night of our engagement, would be appropriate and would look nice on his desk. I find an exquisite double Baccarat frame, which is ridiculously expensive and decide to go for it and put it on my own card. After all, I can’t buy him a gift with his money! I plan to put the two pictures, taken the night of our engagement in it. One is of Ash on his knees, and I’ve got a stunned look on my face with tears in my eyes, gazing at him as he’s slipping the ring on my finger. The second is me sitting in Ash’s lap and he is kissing me. I’m excited to give it to him and decide to call him to on my way home and he answers on the first ring, almost
like he was expecting me to call. “Hey Sunshine! You done shopping already?”

  I smile at the sound of his voice. “Yes sir, I’ve done some serious financial damage to you.”

  He laughs into the phone, “Well, I’ll be the judge of that. You’d better have spent a lot of money.”

  “I did, and I can’t wait for you to see what I bought.”

  “Okay, I’ll see you soon. Drive safe. Wanna go out for dinner?”

  “Sounds wonderful. See you in about thirty minutes.”

  As soon as I pull up, he comes out to help me carry everything in. “Damn! You weren’t lying!” He laughs as he gives me a hug. “Did you buy anything sexy?”

  I bat my eyes at him, “As a matter of fact, I sure did.” I show him all of my purchases, and he’s elated. “Well, after dinner, you are for sure gonna model the lingerie for me.”

  ***

  We head out to dinner, and I am nervously clock watching. Tonight's the night Tommy’s proposing to Emily. As each hour ticks away, I’m wondering what they’re doing. “Think Tommy will call us and let us know?” I ask.

  Ash laughs and winks at me, “Well, I’d imagine so. Stop worrying, Olivia. I can tell you’re overthinking things.” He’s absolutely right, but I can’t help it. I am the consummate worry wart.

  We have a wonderful dinner at a restaurant, and it is there that I tell Ash about running into Alan and Kelly at the mall. He looks worried and shocked. “Oh damn. Why didn’t you call me? Are you okay?”

  Knowing he’s concerned, makes me feel so good. “Well, I have to admit it was awkward talking to them, especially since you weren’t there to run defense for me. But I think I did alright. It bothered me at first, but I got to thinking what a wonderful man I had waiting for me at home, and it made things much better. I felt sad seeing how happy she makes him, and I started to blame myself for not making him happy enough to stay in our marriage.”

  He smiles at me and gently takes my face in his hands. “Alan gave you up honey, and I thank God every goddamn day that he did. Never for a minute, think it wasn’t fate that brought us together.” The restaurant has a band playing 60’s music, which we both love. He kisses my cheek softly and invites me with his eyes, “Dance with me?” He takes my hand, and proudly leads me the dance floor, where I feel like a princess with my prince charming. He implores me, “Don’t think about anyone tonight, but you and me. You’re mine, I’m yours, and that’s really all that matters.”

  Around eleven, we decide to head home and I’m wondering when Tommy will call. The suspense is killing me. Ash gets a text while he’s driving, looks at his phone and hands it to me. I can tell he’s curious, but he’s hiding it, putting on a nonchalant facade. “Here. Better check that, Olivia. It’s from Tommy.”

  Indeed it is. It’s a video titled ‘She said yes!’ They’re on the Ferris wheel, and are both crying happy tears. “Well? Good news??” Ash anxiously asks.

  “Oh dear God yes. Yes it’s wonderful news, Ash. She said yes!” I see that Tommy’s sent this as a group text, and the replies keep coming in. Lainey, Bradley, Dalton, Ellen, Melissa, all the guys, and even Hayden and Wesley. All are sending their congrats. I can’t keep up with all the replies. About that time, Ross calls Ash, and the call comes in on the Bluetooth.

  “Hey there buddy. Just got the group text. Wonderful news. Damn, you Harper guys are scoring big time with the ladies.”

  Ash laughs, “Aww Ross thanks man. We’re pretty damn excited too.”

  “So why don’t you and Olivia stop by for a nightcap? We’re band-less tonight, but there’s a pretty good crowd, and drinks are on the house.” I excitedly nod my head yes, and Ash tells Ross.

  “Sounds good, Ross. The boss lady says yes, so we’ll head on over.”

  I text Todd and tell him we’re headed to the club for a quick drink, and he responds right back.

  ‘I’ll get the guys, and we’ll head over too…cool?’

  ‘You’d better come!’ I respond.

  Once we get to the club, the guys walk in shortly after.

  Brady gives me a hug and shakes Ash’s hand. “I called Tommy and told him and Em to get their asses over here too!”

  About that time, Ash’s phone rings.

  “Hey Dad, we’re headed to the club. You gonna be there awhile?” Tommy asks.

  “Of course we are. We’ve got something to celebrate. So happy for you son.”

  “Thanks Dad. See you in a few.”

  Todd comes up and gives Ash a man hug.

  “Congrats Mr. H! Fuckin awesome news. My main man Tommy’s gettin married. Can you fuckin believe it?”

  Ash laughs, as several other guys come to offer congratulations.

  “I was getting so nervous waiting to hear from Tommy - once we got the text, I was so relieved to know she said yes.”

  Laughing, Todd replies, “Seriously, Olivia, I mean seriously, was there any fucking doubt? I mean come on - they’re fucking love birds. We all knew she’d say yes. Hands down. No one even wanted to place bets against it.”

  I spot Tommy and Emily coming through the door. Ross gets on the PA and makes an announcement. He’s waving his hands to get the crowd excited.

  “Folks I need your attention please! Let’s give a huge welcome and congrats to Tommy and Emily! Tommy as you know - is lead singer for Avenue, our all-time favorite band, and Emily here has just agreed to be his wife. Woo Hoo! Let’s get the party started and show them some love. Can I get a HELL YEAH?” The crowd erupts with whistles and clapping, and I can tell Emily’s a bit embarrassed by all the attention. Tommy has his arm affectionately around her, leading her to the table, stopping along the way to greet the fans. He’s smiling from ear to ear, and I can honestly say I haven’t seen him look happier. I stand up by my chair clapping and motion to Emily.

  Shyly smiling, she rolls her eyes and shakes her head, “Boy what a night this has been.”

  I’m dying for details, so I eagerly ask “So, were you surprised?”

  “Olivia, you have no idea. I still can’t believe he got me on that dang ferris wheel. I’m scared to death of heights, and I almost told him to get lost when he got our tickets. He did some fancy talking to get me up on that thing, I swear.”

  I have to laugh, as I try to picture him persuading her to get on. “So your tears in the video were from fright and not happiness?”

  “Ha a little of both. Mostly happy tears though. Hey! He cried too.” One by one, people are coming to the table to congratulate them. I think the reality of what’s happened tonight is finally hitting her, as she sits down at the table. She puts her head on my shoulder, as Tommy excuses himself and steps away to talk with the guys.

  She’s clearly emotional, as she turns to face me and holds her left hand out to me. “Wanna see my ring? Isn’t it beautiful?”

  I take her hand and marvel at this simple, but elegant ring. Its white gold with an oval diamond, and is probably no more than half a carat, but it’s perfect.

  Her face is radiant with happiness as I tell her, “Emily, honey it’s absolutely gorgeous. I love it!”

  “God I love him so much Olivia, and I can’t believe I’m the lucky girl who gets to marry him.”

  “I knew he fell for you the moment he met you. A mom can just tell these things.” She gets a certain look of sadness in her eyes, and I wish I hadn’t just said that last remark. I can tell that she is missing her own mother, which breaks my heart. I think again and wonder how a mother could just bail on her own child, and it makes no sense to me whatsoever. Ash brings her a beer and gives her a hug, which seems to make her happy. Ash has an incredible way of making people happy.

  About that time, Todd swaggers over to our table. Smiling that classic Todd smile and acting silly. Emily gets up to give him a hug, and he messes up her hair. “Em, geez girl you’ve just made my best friend the happiest fucking guy in the whole world, I hope you know. I was beginning to wonder about him.” They both laugh and Todd takes her hand, leading h
er to the dance floor. Todd looks at Tommy with a sheepish grin. “Hey, I get first dance with her. You get her for the rest of your life, dude.”

  Ross has put music on the jukebox and the song Celebration by Kool and the Gang comes on. Ash is shaking his hips playfully, as he takes my hand, twirls me around and leads me to the dance floor, waving his hand telling everyone. “We’ve got some celebrating to do. Everyone get up and dance.”

  The floor is packed and Ross brings champagne to the table, as he calls out to Ash.

  “The rate you Harpers are going, I should probably stock more of this.”

  With a shit eating grin on his face, Ash reminds me, “I still haven’t forgotten that you have some lingerie to model for me when we get home. The plan may have gotten delayed, but not forgotten.”

  I teasingly put my finger on his chin, bringing his face to mine, “Rest assured, Mr. Harper I haven’t forgotten.”

  After a bit, Kyra walks in and Todd’s face immediately lights up. He proudly escorts her to our table, and is beaming from ear to ear.

  “My main squeeze is here - ain’t she pretty?”

  I laugh at his reference to her. “She sure is. Hey Kyra.” She gives Ash and I a hug and plops herself down in Emily’s lap, hugging her tight, and they are giddy with happiness. She takes Emily’s hand and admires the ring. I can tell they’ve gotten really close over the past few months. Their friendship is a good thing, with the guys going on tour. I can tell that Emily is overwhelmed and seems tired, so I scoot over by her and give her a hug.

  “Emily, I’ll be here for you and I’d love to go with you to pick out your dress, or do whatever you want me to. I definitely don’t want to overstep my bounds, but would love to help in whatever way I can.”

  She smiles at me and kisses my cheek. “I’d love for you to help! You’re like a mother to me, and I want you with me in this every step of the way. Please don’t think you’re overstepping anything. I don’t want to impose on you, but I’d love if you could be my mom in this!”