My One Night: An On My Own Novel

by Carrie Ann Ryan

  “It’s a good one,” he said. “You didn’t do any of that stuff?” he asked, leaning against the wall as he looked at me. He made it seem like he was interested in what I had to say, and I couldn’t help but relax a bit. I didn’t know this guy, and yet I was speaking to him. I wasn’t hiding. It was odd.

  “We started playing Truth or Dare when we were little, and it escalated into fun things—sometimes dangerous but never cruel,” I put in, wanting him to understand. Not that I even understood. “Corinne dared me to have fun tonight.”

  Dillon grinned. “And kissing me was fun?”

  “I’m pretty sure you already know it was. No need for me to inflate your ego.”

  He put his hand over his heart and took a staggering step back until he bumped against the wall.

  “Ouch. What did I ever do to you?”

  Haunted my dreams and made me wonder what the hell was wrong with me. Of course, I didn’t say that aloud.

  “And, yes, she dared me to kiss you. But as I said before, I planned to ask before I did it. It only seemed right.”

  “Well, I’m glad you asked. It made this evening a little more fun.”

  I looked around the full house. Saw people laughing, drinking a little too much, and others kissing in dark corners. More made out right in the open. “You weren’t having fun?”

  He shrugged. “I guess. Just having an off evening.”

  I flinched, and he cursed under his breath.

  “That’s not what I meant. Sorry. I was having an off night before you showed up. And I swear that’s not a line. Thank you for asking me to kiss you. I enjoyed it.”

  “And that’s not a line?” I asked dryly.

  “It could be. However, let’s just forget lines and dares and everything. It’s nice to meet you, Elise. I’m glad you came tonight.”

  “I guess I’m glad, too. I’m really not good at this sort of thing.”

  “And what sort of thing is this?” he asked. I could have punched him.

  “You know what I mean. Talking to other human beings.”

  He laughed. “Sometimes, I feel like that, too. Although my siblings would say I never shut up.”

  “That’s the second time you’ve mentioned them. Am I allowed to ask you more?” I inquired, eager to know, even though I knew I shouldn’t pry.

  I was only setting myself up for failure.

  Dillon smiled. “I have three brothers, but they’re all a bit older. They each recently got married and are now working on the next gen.”

  “So, you’re going to be an uncle. That’s sweet.”

  “I hope so. Somebody needs to spoil the kids.”

  “And that’s going to be you?”

  “Okay, maybe the other brothers will do the spoiling, but I can be the fun uncle. And then once I get a full-time job after school, I can start saving money so I can spoil.”

  “So, the reason you’re going to college and working on a career—whatever that may be—is so you can spoil your nieces and nephews? Good priorities.”

  “Exactly. I’ll be sure to write that down on my senior thesis. You know, when they ask you where you see yourself in five years? I’ll be covered in Play-Doh and flour, or whatever other sticky things the kids are into, and all of my money will go to them. Sounds like a plan.”

  “You’re ridiculous, but I kind of like it.”

  “Me, too.” He cleared his throat. “Do you need something to drink?” he asked. “It doesn’t need to be liquor. We have other things. I promise.”

  “Honestly, I think I could use a beer. Is that okay?”

  “We’re not carding here,” he said. “After all, I’m only twenty. Don’t tell anyone,” he whispered.

  I smiled.

  “Same. I promise I won’t blab.”

  “Well, good. I like that I’m not hitting on a younger girl.”

  “Hitting on?” I asked as he slowly led me towards the kegs for a drink. This time, he set his hand on the small of my back, and I felt the heat of him again.

  What was wrong with me?

  “Well, you did kiss me first.”

  “I thought you were the one who kissed me.”

  “Only because you asked. And I say ‘only’ because I would typically ask the girl more than her name first.”

  I smiled as we made our way to the kegs. I didn’t recognize anyone in the kitchen.

  He got me a cup, and I watched him pour then hand it to me directly. I kept my eyes on his hands, and he gave me a tight nod. “I’m glad you’re being safe. Though if I or any of my roommates see somebody putting something in a girl’s drink, they’re going to have to answer to both us and the cops. We don’t play that shit.”

  “I’m glad you’re watching out for people.”

  “I’m not getting drunk tonight, and neither are Miles or Tanner. It’s our turn to watch the rest of the party. Not that Miles or Tanner ever get drunk, but whatever.”

  “You guys take this whole party house thing seriously.”

  “Maybe. Sometimes. We try. Anyway, tell me more about yourself.”

  “Why?” I asked, staring at him, wanting to know why he cared.

  He blinked, nonplussed. “What do you mean?”

  “Why do you want to know more about me?”

  “Because I think you’re interesting?” he asked. “That was a question, not a statement.” He laughed. “I don’t know, it was a nice way to meet somebody, a dare that led to a kiss. I want to get to know you a bit more.”

  “Well, like I said, I’m not really good at this. And I don’t have time for a relationship or getting to know somebody like that. I’m a double major, and I rarely leave the house. I don’t want you to be disappointed when I leave here tonight and the only thing you got was that kiss.”

  Dillon stared at me and then shook his head.

  “I’m only a single major, but I also work. I’m not good at the whole relationship thing either. And, honestly, I was just asking you a little bit more about yourself.”

  My cheeks heated. “Oh.”

  “However, I get it. And it’s good to know where I am upfront.”

  “I’m not usually such a jerk. I’m just a little flustered, I guess. I didn’t expect Corinne to dare me like that. But I should have been ready.”

  “What else did she dare you to do?” he asked point-blank, and I froze.

  “What?”

  “She dared you to do something else, didn’t she?”

  I swallowed hard, mortification sliding over me. “Maybe.”

  “And what was it?” he asked softly.

  I met his gaze and licked my lips. “To have fun tonight. To lower my inhibitions and do the one thing I’ve never done before.”

  Dillon looked at me, tilting his head. “And what is that?”

  “I don’t know if I should tell you,” I said quickly.

  “You really can’t leave me hanging.” He looked around the empty kitchen. “People are heading out, and nobody can hear you but me. What did she dare you to do?”

  I met his gaze and swallowed hard. “She dared me, that if the occasion arose, to do the one thing I’ve never done before. As I said.” I paused. “To have a one-night stand.”

  Dillon blinked, and I bit my lip.

  “Oh,” he whispered. “Is that something you want?”

  “I don’t know,” I said quickly. “I’m not against it,” I said, lowering my head. Then I raised my chin again until I met his gaze.

  I saw that his eyes had darkened, and his mouth had parted ever so slightly. “Well then, I think it’s time to see exactly what kind of dare we’re dealing with. A one-night stand, you say?” he asked, and I nodded, my cheeks flushing.

  “Is that something you would be interested in?” he asked, his voice very careful.

  I bit my lip, studied his face, and knew I needed to tell the truth.

  “Yes.”

  I only hoped to hell there was a path through the crowd later so I could run as quickly as I could.


  Chapter 3

  Dillon

  * * *

  “I didn’t think you’d say yes,” I said, blinking down at Elise. Her eyes widened, and she blushed again, that pale, pretty skin turning pink.

  “Well, if you don’t want to... I mean, I guess I could find someone else,” she said quickly, and I growled. Actually growled.

  “No, you don’t get to find someone else.”

  “You got a little possessive and growly right then. I think I kind of liked it. What was in that beer?” Elise asked, looking down at her cup.

  “You had four sips. And you watched me pour it. There’s nothing in that beer. And we can pretend we didn’t just say any of that, if you want.”

  “Um, that’s not what I’m saying,” she said softly, leaning forward.

  “Okay, what were you saying?” I asked, my voice low.

  “I’m saying it would be nice to act like a normal college student for once. At least, for the evening.”

  “And you think normal college students have one-night stands?” I asked incredulously.

  “Maybe? I told you I’m not good at this.”

  Though nobody was around, I still looked over my shoulder, making sure.

  “You’re not a virgin, are you?” I asked, even if it was invasive. Then again, these were the kinds of questions I needed answers to.

  Her eyes widened, and she laughed. “No. I’m not. I’m not as innocent as you may think, Dillon.”

  I wasn’t sure about that, but I still smiled. “Really?” I asked. “Not innocent?”

  “Okay, maybe in some things. But I’ve had sex before. And not just once.” Her eyes widened again, and she put her hand over her mouth. “I can’t believe I just said that,” she mumbled between her fingers.

  I laughed. I couldn’t help it. “Come on, let’s get out of the kitchen where anybody can eavesdrop.”

  She blushed again, then looked around frantically. “Okay, that sounds like a plan.”

  I held out my hand, and she looked down at my palm before slowly sliding her fingers into mine. “We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do. But you intrigue me, Elise. And you make me laugh. I think I could use that.”

  “Oh?” she asked, and I shook my head. “Forget I said that. About the needing. Let’s just see what happens tonight and have fun.”

  “Deal. Nothing serious. No deep talks. No promises.”

  “I can do that,” I said, wondering what the hell I was doing. This wasn’t necessarily unlike me, but I wasn’t usually so upfront about it. Having a conversation about a one-night stand seemed odd.

  And yet, with Elise, it made a weird kind of sense.

  She needed to be open and honest, and I couldn’t help but be the same way. There were things I didn’t want to talk about, didn’t want to deal with. So, I wouldn’t.

  And maybe, just maybe, I could have fun for the evening. Make a connection, ever so brief. It would be nice not to worry about random shit. Not to focus on the things surrounding me and reaching in, not ever letting me go.

  “Come on, then,” I said, clearing my throat.

  “Where are we going?”

  “The only place I know where nobody can overhear.”

  We passed Pacey, who seemed to have found Alexa, but I didn’t see any of my other roommates. The place was slowly emptying out, and Pacey gave me a nod and then raised a brow as I passed.

  In that gesture, I knew that he would take care of closing up the house, but that raised brow told me that he would ask what the hell was going on later. And I probably would have to tell him, just as soon as I figured out what this night was. We walked up the stairs, Elise’s hand in mine as she followed me.

  A couple of people were still on the stairs, just talking, and they didn’t pay us any mind as we made our way up the steps and down the hallway to my room.

  I pulled out my keys and unlocked the door. Elise laughed.

  “Is that how you keep people off your bed?” she asked and then turned bright red.

  “A guy has to be careful. Pacey warned me. He didn’t lock his door once in his old house and walked into the room with the girl he was seeing, only to find somebody already enjoying his bed.”

  “Oh, hell,” she said with a laugh.

  “Exactly. Anyway, here’s my home.” I shrugged and took a step back. When we had chosen rooms, thanks to Pacey’s Twizzlers, I’d ended up with the master. Each room had its own bathroom and was each a different size. Somehow, I had the largest room in the house with the most massive bathroom—though not the biggest tub. And while I might love it, I still felt terrible that I had all this extra space. I even had a little seating area, one where it was nice to get some work done when I didn’t want to study downstairs with the rest of the guys.

  It was like a tiny apartment up here within the big house, and I knew I was blessed. I still paid the same rent as the other guys, even though I didn’t think it was fair, but they had all agreed that it made no sense to go by square footage when the rest of the house was so big. Everybody had the space they needed. Mine just happened to be in my bedroom.

  “This is a bigger room than I thought you’d have,” she said, looking around. “It’s like three times the size of mine.”

  I chuckled, my shoulders tensing. “It was a big statehouse back in the day. And since this is the master bedroom, I have all the space. I didn’t ask for it,” I said quickly at her look. “I just got lucky when we drew straws. Or Twizzlers, in that case.”

  “You drew candy and got the biggest room?” she asked, laughing.

  “Yeah, sometimes fate works out pretty weird,” I said, meeting her gaze. It was a bit awkward now. It had been a little strange before, but now it felt as if we were on the brink of something that could change everything. Still, I needed to stop worrying about being so serious. I didn’t know if we would go through with what we had talked about, but maybe we would. Or perhaps we would just sit in my little seating area and talk for the night. I didn’t know what I wanted, but I did know that I would be happy with either outcome. It was so weird that I would think that after just meeting this person.

  But then again, I remembered her from the coffee shop. I remembered looking at her, remembered that first glance. Even then, I’d wondered who she was. Later that evening, I had broken up with Mandy, though not because of the girl with the bright eyes and the intriguing face. Still, she had haunted my dreams a few times and made me want to know more about her. But I had broken up with Mandy because she hadn’t wanted to be with me and had called me less than. She had said that I wasn’t worth dating for long. That I wasn’t the forever type. I might not have wanted forever with Mandy, but I had thought we had at least been on the same page. I hadn’t known I was just her boy toy for the afternoon while she waited for someone better to come along.

  I had been a stand-in for most of my life until my brother Cameron took me in. I had been less than in my mother’s eyes for her entire life, and even less than that in my father’s—a man I didn’t even know.

  I hadn’t wanted to be that with Mandy.

  I felt a soft brush of fingertips on my skin and looked up into Elise’s eyes.

  “Why are you frowning? You look so sad.”

  I shook my head and pushed those thoughts from my mind. “It’s not important.”

  She tilted her head. “Maybe it is.”

  “Maybe. But not for tonight.” I let out a sigh. “I want to talk about happy things. Nothing important. You know?”

  She nodded and leaned into the cushions as we sat down on the small loveseat in my room. “Yeah, I constantly have to talk about important things with my friends and my family. They’re always wanting to know what I’m thinking or doing. And while I love them, I sometimes just want to pretend that nothing’s wrong for the moment. You know?”

  “Exactly,” I said, relieved that she understood.

  “Not that we need to do anything tonight,” I repeated.

  “Totally. We
don’t need to do anything,” she whispered and then licked her lips. I couldn’t help but follow the gesture and lick mine in response.

  Her eyes widened, and her mouth parted slightly.

  “What are we doing?” she whispered.

  “I have no fucking clue,” I said, shaking my head. “But I kind of want to find out.”

  I leaned forward and gently brushed my lips over hers. She let out a shocked gasp and then opened for me, sliding her tongue against mine.

  I groaned and deepened the kiss slightly before moving back, needing to catch my breath and gather my thoughts.

  “We don’t have to do anything, but if you want, I think we could have a little fun,” I said, knowing that wasn’t the best line. I didn’t even want to use lines. I wanted to be open and honest. And, hell, I wanted to taste her again. Something about her called to me, and there was probably something wrong with that. A temptation and an addiction that I needed to stay away from. But I didn’t want to. Not then.

  Maybe not ever.

  “You taste so sweet,” I whispered, and she looked up at me.

  “Oh?” she said, her voice breathy.

  “Yes, and I want more,” I said softly.

  “Good. Me, too.”

  I loved her contradiction. Sometimes, she was all fire and directness. Other times, she was the exact opposite as if she were still trying to find out who she was and determine what she wanted. I didn’t mind. I was pretty much the same. And for the evening, it felt like we fit together.

  At least, I hoped so.

  I kissed her again, brushing her hair away from her face as I did. She tentatively slid her hands down my arms, squeezing my biceps, and I leaned into her, wanting more. She tasted slightly of beer and toothpaste. An odd combination but it worked. I kissed her harder, running my hands across her face and then down her neck to her collarbones. She shivered at the touch, and I grinned before backing away slightly to nibble at her lip.

  She groaned, and I moved a bit, kneeling with one leg on the loveseat to slightly push her back against the side of the cushion. Her eyes widened, and then she slowly trailed her fingers up my ribs, over my shirt. I hovered over her and then kissed her again, this time gently placing my hand on her side, under the softness of her top. Her skin was warm, so fucking silky, and I groaned as she let out a breath. She kissed me deeper, and I moaned, slowly lowering myself so I knelt between her legs. I kissed her again, then slowly moved my hand up, cupping her ribs just below her breast. She groaned, and I kissed her harder.