Two Alone

by Sandra Brown

  “Sex.” He made the word sound as dirty as possible.

  Rusty recoiled from the ugliness of his tone, but tossed her head back proudly. “Not to me. I love you, Cooper.”

  “So you said.”

  “I meant it!”

  “You were in the throes of passion when you said it. That doesn’t count.”

  “You don’t believe that I love you?”

  “No. There’s no such thing.”

  “Oh, there is.” She played her trump card. “You still love your unborn child.”

  “Shut up.”

  “You grieve for it still because you loved it. You still love all those men you saw die in that prisoner-of-war camp.”

  “Rusty...” He came off the bed and loomed over her threateningly.

  “You watched your mother spend her life nursing her anger and bitterness. She thrived on her misfortune. Do you want to waste your life like that?”

  “Better that than to live like you, constantly striving to be someone you’re not.”

  Hostility crackled between them. It was so strong that at first they didn’t even notice the doorbell. It wasn’t until Bill Carlson called out his daughter’s name that they realized they weren’t alone.

  “Rusty!”

  “Yes, Father.” She dropped back onto the edge of the bed and started yanking on her clothes.

  “Is everything okay? Whose beat-up old car is that out front?”

  “I’ll be right out, Father.”

  Cooper was pulling on his clothes with considerably more composure than she. She couldn’t help but wonder if this was the first time he had found himself in an awkward situation like this, maybe with the untimely appearance of a husband.

  Once they were dressed, he helped her to her feet and handed her her crutches. Together they went through the bedroom door and down the hall. Red-faced, knowing that her hair was in wild tumble and that she smelled muskily of sex, Rusty entered the living room.

  Her father was impatiently pacing the hardwood floor. When he turned around and saw Cooper, his face went taut with disapproval. He treated Cooper to a frigid stare before casting his judgmental eyes on his daughter.

  “I hated to let a day go by without coming to see you.”

  “Thank you, Father, but it really isn’t necessary for you to stop by every day.”

  “So I see.”

  “You...you remember Mr. Landry.”

  The two men nodded to each other coolly, taking each other’s measure like opposing champion warriors who would decide the outcome of a battle. Cooper kept his mouth stubbornly shut. Rusty couldn’t speak; she was too embarrassed. Carlson was the first to break the stressful silence.

  “Actually, this is an opportune meeting,” he said. “I have something to discuss with both of you. Shall we sit down?”

  “Surely,” Rusty said, flustered. “I’m sorry. Uh, Cooper?” She gestured toward a chair. He hesitated, then dropped into the overstuffed armchair. His insolence grated on her raw nerves. She gave him a baleful look, but he was staring at her father. He’d watched the Gawrylow men with that same kind of suspicious caution. The memory disturbed Rusty. What correlation between them and her father was he making in his mind? She moved toward a chair near Carlson.

  “What do you want to discuss with us, Father?”

  “That land deal I mentioned to you a few weeks ago.” Rusty’s lungs caved in. She could feel each membrane giving way, collapsing one on top of the other. Her cheeks paled, and her palms became immediately slick with nervous perspiration. A choir of funeral bells started tolling in her ears. “I thought we had that all settled.”

  Carlson chuckled amiably. “Not quite. But now we do. Now the investors have had a chance to put some concrete ideas on paper. They’d like to present these ideas for Mr. Landry’s consideration.”

  “Somebody want to tell me what the hell is going on?” Cooper rudely interrupted.

  “No.”

  “Of course.” Carlson overrode his daughter’s negative reply and seized the floor. In his typically genial manner, he outlined his ideas for developing the area around Rogers Gap into an exclusive ski resort.

  Summing up, he said, “Before we’re done, working with only the most innovative architects and builders, it will rival Aspen, Vail, Keystone, anything in the Rockies or around Lake Tahoe. In several years I’ll bet we could swing the Winter Olympics our way.” Leaning back in his chair and smiling expansively, he said, “Well, Mr. Landry, what do you think?”

  Cooper, who hadn’t so much as blinked an eye during Carlson’s recital, slowly rolled off his slouching spine and came to his feet. He circled the island of furniture several times as though considering the proposal from every angle. Since he owned some of the land that would be used—Carlson had done his homework—and had been offered the salaried, figurehead position as local coordinator of the project, he stood to make a great deal of money.

  Carlson glanced at his daughter and winked, assured of capitulation.

  “What do I think?” Cooper repeated.

  “That’s what I asked,” Carlson said jovially.

  Cooper looked him straight in the eye. “I think you are full of garbage, and I think your idea sucks.” He dumped those words in the middle of the floor like a ton of bricks, then added, “And for your information, so does your daughter.”

  He gave Rusty a look that should have turned her to stone. He didn’t even deign to slam the door shut behind himself after he stamped out. They heard his car roar to life, then the crunch of gravel as he steered out of her driveway.

  Carlson harrumphed and said, “Well, I see that I was right about him all along.”

  Knowing that she would never recover from the wound Cooper had inflicted on her, Rusty said dully, “You couldn’t be more wrong, Father.”

  “He’s crude.”

  “Honest.”

  “A man without ambition or social graces.”

  “Without pretenses.”

  “And apparently without morals. He took advantage of your solitude and confinement.”

  She laughed softly. “I don’t remember exactly who dragged whom into the bedroom, but he certainly didn’t force me into bed with him.”

  “So you are lovers?”

  “Not anymore,” she said tearfully.

  Cooper thought she had betrayed him, too, just like that other woman, Melody. He thought she had been her father’s instrument, using bedroom tactics to turn a profit. He would never forgive her, because he didn’t believe that she loved him.

  “You’ve been his lover all this time? Behind my back?”

  She started to point out that at the ripe old age of twenty-seven she shouldn’t have to account to her father for her private life. But what was the use? What did it matter? The starch had gone out of her. She felt sapped of strength, of energy, of the will to live.

  “When we were in Canada, yes. We became lovers. When he left my hospital room that day, he went home and hasn’t been back since. Not until this afternoon.”

  “Then apparently he has more sense than I gave him credit for. He realizes that the two of you are completely incompatible. Like most women, you’re looking at the situation through a pink fog of romance. You’re letting your emotions rule you instead of your head. I thought you were above that female frailty.”

  “Well, I’m not, Father. A female is what I happen to be. And I have all the frailties, as well as all the strengths, that go with being a woman.”

  He came to his feet and crossed the room. He gave her a conciliatory hug. She was standing on her crutches so he didn’t notice how stiffly she held herself in resistance to his embrace. “I can see that Mr. Landry has upset you again. He truly is a scoundrel to have said what he did about you. You’re better off without him, Rusty, believe me.

  “However,” he continued briskly, “we won’t let his lack of charm keep us from doing business with him. I intend to move forward with our plans in spite of his objections to them.”
r />   “Father, I beg you—”

  He laid a finger against her lips. “Hush, now. Let’s not talk anymore tonight. Tomorrow you’ll feel better. You’re still emotionally overwrought. Having surgery so soon after the plane crash probably wasn’t such a good idea. It’s perfectly understandable that you’re not quite yourself. One of these days you’ll come to your senses and return to being the old Rusty. I have every confidence that you won’t disappoint me.”

  He kissed her forehead. “Good night, my dear. Look over this proposal,” he said, withdrawing a file folder from his lizard briefcase and laying it on the coffee table. “I’ll drop by tomorrow morning, eager to hear your opinion.”

  After he left, Rusty locked up her house and returned to the bedroom. She bathed, languishing in a hot bubble bath. She’d taken one every day since the doctor had said it was okay to get her leg wet. But once she was dried, lotioned, and powdered, she still hadn’t rid her body of the traces of Cooper’s lovemaking.

  She was pleasantly sore between her thighs. The blemish he’d left on her breast still showed up rosily, as indelible as a tattoo. Her lips were tender and puffy. Every time she wet them with her tongue, she could taste him.

  Looking at herself in the mirror, she admitted that he was right. She did look as if she’d just been engaged in rowdy lovemaking.

  Her bed seemed as large and empty as a football field during the off-season. The linens still smelled like Cooper. In her mind she relived every moment they’d spent together that afternoon—the giving and taking of pleasure; the exchange of erotic dialogue. Even now, his whispered, naughty words echoed through her mind, causing her to flush hotly all over.

  She yearned for him and could find no comfort in the thought that her life would be a series of empty days and joyless nights like this one.

  She’d have her work, of course.

  And her father.

  Her wide circle of friends.

  Her social activities.

  It wouldn’t be enough.

  There was a great big hole where the man she loved should be.

  She sat up in bed and clutched the sheet against her, as though the realization she’d just had would get away from her if she didn’t hold on to it until she could act upon it.

  Her choices were clear. She could either roll over and play dead. Or she could fight for him. Her main adversary would be Cooper himself. He was mule-headed and mistrustful. But eventually she would wear him down and convince him that she loved him and that he loved her.

  Yes, he did! He could deny it until he gasped his dying breath, but she would never believe that he didn’t love her—because right after her father had made that hateful disclosure, just before Cooper’s face had hardened with contempt, she’d seen incredible pain there. She wouldn’t have the power to hurt him that badly unless he loved her.

  She lay back down, glowing in her resolution and knowing exactly what she had to do the following morning.

  Her father was taken off guard. A strategist as shrewd as General Patton, he had slipped up. He hadn’t expected a surprise attack.

  When she made her unannounced appearance in his office the next morning, he glanced up from his highly polished, white lacquered desk and exclaimed, “Why, Rusty! What...what a lovely surprise.”

  “Good morning, Father.”

  “What are you doing out? Not that the reason matters. I’m delighted to see you up and around.”

  “I had to see you and didn’t want to wait to be worked into your busy schedule.”

  He chose to ignore the note of censure in her voice and walked around his desk with his hands outstretched to take hers. “You’re feeling much better—I can tell. Did Mrs. Watkins offer you coffee?”

  “She did, but I declined.”

  He regarded her casual clothes. “Apparently you’re not going to your office.”

  “No, I’m not.”

  He cocked his head to one side, obviously waiting for an explanation. When none was forthcoming he asked, “Where are your crutches?”

  “In my car.”

  “You drove here? I didn’t think—”

  “Yes, I drove myself. I wanted to walk in here under my own steam and stand on my own two feet.”

  He backed away from her and propped his hips against the edge of his desk. Casually he crossed his ankles and folded his arms over his middle. Rusty recognized the stance. It was the tactical one he assumed when he was backed into a corner but didn’t want his rivals to know that he was. “I take it you read the proposal.” With a smooth motion of his head, he indicated the folder she was carrying under her arm.

  “I did.”

  “And?”

  She ripped the folder in two. Tossing the remnants on the glassy surface of his desk, she said, “Lay off Cooper Landry. Drop the Rogers Gap project. Today.”

  He laughed at her sophomoric gesture and shrugged helplessly, spreading his arms wide in appeal. “It’s a little late for that, Rusty dear. The ball has already started rolling.”

  “Stop it from rolling.”

  “I can’t.”

  “Then you’re in a real jam with these investors you collected, Father—” she leaned forward “—because I’m going to privately and publicly resist you on this. I’ll have every conservationist group in the country beating down your door in protest. I don’t think you want that.”

  “Rusty, for Heaven’s sake, come to your senses,” he hissed.

  “I did. Sometime between midnight and 2:00 a.m., I realized that there’s something much more important to me than any real-estate deal. Even more important to me than winning your approval.”

  “Landry?”

  “Yes.” Her voice rang with conviction. She was not to be swayed.

  But Carlson tried. “You’d give up everything you’ve worked for to have him?”

  “Loving Cooper doesn’t take anything away from what I’ve done in the past or will do in the future. Love this strong can only embellish, not tear down.”

  “Do you realize how ridiculous you sound?”

  She didn’t take offense. Instead she laughed. “I guess I do. Lovers often babble nonsensically, don’t they?”

  “This is no laughing matter, Rusty. If you do this, it’s an irreversible decision. Once you give up your position here, that’s it.”

  “I don’t think so, Father,” she said, calling his bluff. “Think how bad it would be for business if you fired your most effective employee.” She produced a key from the pocket of her nylon windbreaker. “To my office.” She slid the key across his desk. “I’ll be taking an indefinite leave of absence.”

  “You’re making a fool of yourself.”

  “I made a fool of myself at Great Bear Lake. I did that for love, too.” She turned on her heels and headed for the door.

  “Where are you going?” Bill Carlson barked. He wasn’t accustomed to someone walking out on him.

  “To Rogers Gap.”

  “And do what?”

  Rusty faced her father. She loved him. Very much. But she could no longer sacrifice her own happiness for his. With staunch conviction she said, “I’m going to do something that Jeff could never do: I’m going to have a baby.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  Rusty stood on the cliff and breathed deeply of the cool, crisp air. She never tired of the scenery. It was constant, and yet ever changing. Today the sky was like a blue china bowl turned upside down over the earth. Snow still capped the mountain peaks against the horizon. The trees ranged in color from the blue-green of the evergreens to the delicate green of trees on the verge of spring budding.

  “Aren’t you cold?”

  Her husband came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her. She snuggled against him. “Not now. How’s the foal?”

  “He’s having breakfast—to his and his mother’s mutual contentment.”

  She smiled and tilted her head to one side. He inched down the turtleneck of her sweater and kissed her beneath her ear. “How’s the other
new mother on the place?”

  “I’m not a new mother yet.” She glowed with pleasure as he ran his large hands over her swollen abdomen.

  “Looks that way to me.”

  “You think this new figure of mine is amusing, don’t you?” She frowned at him over her shoulder, but it was hard to maintain that expression when he was gazing at her with such evident love.

  “I love it.”

  “I love you.”

  They kissed. “I love you, too,” he whispered when he lifted his mouth off hers. Words he had found impossible to say before, now came easily to his lips. She had taught him how to love again.

  “You had no choice.”

  “Yeah, I remember that night you showed up on my threshold looking as bedraggled as a homeless kitten in a rainstorm.”

  “Considering what I’d just come through I thought I looked pretty good.”

  “I didn’t know whether to kiss you or paddle you.”

  “You did both.”

  “Yeah, but the paddling didn’t come until much later.”

  They laughed together, but he was serious when he said, “No fooling, I couldn’t believe you drove all that way alone through that kind of weather. Didn’t you listen to your car radio? Didn’t you hear the storm reports? You escorted in the first heavy snowstorm of the season. Every time I think about it, I shudder.” He pulled her closer, crossing his hands over her breasts and nuzzling his face in her hair.

  “I had to see you right then, before I lost my nerve. I would have gone through hell to get here.”

  “You very nearly did.”

  “At the time, it didn’t seem so bad. Besides, I had survived a plane crash. What was a little snow?”

  “Hardly a ‘little snow.’ And driving with your injured leg too.”

  She shrugged dismissively. To their delight the gesture caused her breasts to rise and fall against his hands.

  Murmuring his appreciation, he covered them completely and massaged them gently, aware of the discomfort they’d been giving her lately as a result of her pregnancy.

  “Tender?” he asked.

  “A little.”