Operation Family

by Dobson, Marissa

  “Mr. Batty is here,” Nicole whispered from the doorway.

  “I’ll be right out.” He took one last look at the sleeping girls before leaving the nursery. For the sake of the twins, he’d find a way to balance things with Nicole. They didn’t need the additional tension if things didn’t work out.

  There’s plenty of other women…but not like her. He knew without a doubt she was one of a kind. Images of the sashay of her hips filled his head and hardened his shaft. She was beautiful, so full of life and love. In just a few short days, she’d gotten under his skin, so much that he couldn’t think straight. He needed to pull himself together. At any moment, duty could call, and a distraction could get him killed. His men depended on him having his head on straight, not distracted by a woman, especially not one he was denying himself of.

  He stepped into the living room and wondered why he was denying himself her physical company. The excuses he gave himself were just that. If he wanted her bad enough, they’d find a way to make it work.

  “Lieutenant Commander García, it is nice to finally meet you.” Mr. Batty stood and held out his hand as Mac came around the sofa.

  “Please call me Mac.” He took the lawyer’s hand, returning the firm handshake.

  “Nicole has been filling me in on your plans to return to Virginia together. I think a trial run before the paperwork is drawn up would be the best way to test out joint custody. It will also give her a chance to check out Virginia and your lifestyle.”

  “Raising the girls together seems like the perfect way for us. She loves them, and they need that.” Mac sat down on the sofa and laid his hand over Nicole’s. “Going to Virginia for the holidays will give her a good insight to military life. The Christmas parties will allow her to meet my men and their wives, as well as other military families, without pressure. As you said, it’s a good introduction into the life.”

  “Very well. Then if you’ll keep me updated, I can draw up the paperwork when you’re ready. After the New Year, we can also finalize the house, Shawn’s business transactions, and other documents. Merry Christmas.” Mr. Batty rose from the chair he had been sitting in and grabbed his briefcase. “I’m very sorry for your loss, for both of you. Shawn was a good man. He had an excellent business mind and has made sure the children will have a secure future.”

  “Thank you.” When Mac first pulled up to the house, he wondered what Shawn had done to afford an estate like this. Careers were one thing they’d never discussed; it just never came up, and Mac had never wanted to share the details of his own life. “I’ll see you out.” He rose from the sofa and led the way to the door.

  “I appreciate you coming to us.” Nicole called after the lawyer before he could get out of hearing range. “I’d have called you and saved you the trip, but with the girls’ allergic reaction, I forgot about it.”

  “There’s no problem, Nicole. I’m happy the two of you have worked something out. If you need anything, you have my number.” Mr. Batty stopped by the living room entry.

  “Thank you. I believe it’s all going to work out. We’ll be in touch. Enjoy the holidays and try not to work too hard.”

  Mac listened to Nicole and Mr. Batty’s exchange, but only one comment actually mattered. She was optimistic. Knowing she was on board and looking forward to what the future held gave him hope. It was going to be a bumpy road for both of them, maybe more for her than him, because when he was back on duty, caring for the children would fall on her.

  The lawyer paused before he left, glancing toward the living room. “I received notification this morning that a cottage was purchased by Shawn the day he died. He has already given the owner a check, but with the circumstances, I might be able to get you out of it if you’d prefer. Or I can arrange to put it back on the market.” He kept his voice low and Mac wondered if he knew the importance of the cottage to Nicole.

  “No.” He glanced back toward the living room. “Do what needs to be done, I want it to go into Nicole’s name. It’s hers.”

  “Okay. I’ll be in touch.” Mr. Batty stepped outside and tugged his coat closer. Even in Texas, the cold winter air beat against them. “Take good care of Nicole and the girls, they mean a lot to everyone in this town.”

  “I will. Small towns are hard to find anymore, but don’t worry…we’ll be back. I have no plans to sell the house, so if you know of anyone who’d be willing to keep it maintained while I’m in Virginia, please let me know.”

  Mr. Batty nodded before turning to go back to his car. Mac stood there a moment longer, letting the cold seep into his body and chase away his burning desire for Nicole that never seemed to dissipate.

  “Wow, the wind makes it colder.” He hadn’t heard Nicole come up behind him until she spoke.

  “What did Shawn do for a living?” He turned to her, wondering how his nephew had afforded the house, cottage, and a comfortable nest egg for the girls.

  “Shawn was an investor.” The mention of Shawn’s name brought a distant look to her eyes. “He put money into start-up companies, and if they paid off he made out well. If they didn’t, they still had to pay back the money that was used. He was a genius when it came to business. His investments will transfer to you, to continue to provide financial support for the twins. The last few months I’ve straightened out his bookkeeping, so you shouldn’t have to worry about providing for the girls, even if they want to get doctoral degrees at Ivy League universities.”

  “I’m not concerned about money to raise the girls. Whatever is there will be saved for them—for their colleges, their futures.” He slipped his hand in hers. “Come sit, I want to ask you something.”

  “Something worse than picking up and moving across country?” She teased, but came away from the door with him.

  He couldn’t think of anything lighthearted enough to say, so he remained quiet until they made it to the sofa. What he had to know might be worse for her depending on the answer. It might bring up hard feelings or worse yet, the ghost of his nephew. He still wasn’t sure how he felt about the possibility that there could have been more between Nicole and Shawn than friendship and a working relationship. If she had feelings for his nephew, would that change what was starting to develop between them?

  “Mac, you’ve turned serious, what’s going on?”

  “You asked me before if there was a woman waiting for me back in Virginia.” He paused as they sank down onto the sofa. “When you talk about Shawn, there’s a longing in your eyes—”

  “Where is this going?” She interrupted him before he could get his thought out.

  “I need to know if there was anything between the two of you.”

  “I can’t believe you.” She pulled her hand out of his grasp and leaned back against the sofa. “You think I was screwing Shawn?”

  “Nicole.” He reached out to take hold of her hand again but she pulled farther away. “When you speak of Shawn there seemed to be a deep longing, more than I expected there to be between you two. I just need to know where things stood between you, how deep the feelings go.”

  “Why?”

  How the hell am I supposed to answer that? He could have sworn she could see what’s happening between them. Was it just on his part, or did she feel something toward him too? It had been too long since he had any sort of attraction toward a woman, so maybe he was off his game. All these years he kept his emotions out of the picture when it came to women, keeping his commitments to only the night or a few days while he was on leave. She was throwing him off balance.

  “Answer me,” she demanded, cutting through his thoughts.

  “I need to know…because if you loved him, that could change whatever is happening between us.”

  “I did love him, but not in the way you’re thinking. Shawn became my best friend, another brother. The girls were preemie because of their mother’s unfortunate accident. We spent many hours sitting in the nursery, just holding the girls, giving them the comfort they needed. It gave us time to talk, to really
get to know each other.” She wiped the tears away that had begun to fall. “What you see is sadness, longing, and grief. I’m questioning fate, and everything that people believe in, because I don’t understand how two helpless infants could be brought into a loving family, a family who had been trying so long to have children, only to have it all snatched away from them before their first birthday. I’m not sure that’s the world I want to see more life brought into. If the girls have already handled this much heartache, what is the rest of their life going to be like?”

  “I’ve been in a similar position where I’ve questioned the reason things happened. It leaves you with an emptiness in the pit of your stomach. It’s not a place I’d like to be again.” He had been to the point of wondering if it was all worth it, not long ago.

  “Why?” She leaned closer to him, almost as if she was going to touch him. “What brought you to that place and how did you get past it? Right now it feels like the world will never be the same.”

  “It will until you force yourself to look at the positives. Shawn is gone, but if you believe he’s still watching over the girls, then he’s not that far away. As for what brought me out of the depression, it was my men. They depend on me to have my head in the action, and if I can’t I’m going to get them killed.” More of them killed, he silently corrected.

  “You didn’t answer my entire question.”

  “I know.” He stood from the sofa and put distance between them. “That’s a story for another time.” Or never if he had his way. He didn’t need her to hear that he’d failed his men. That two of them were dead and another had lost his leg on a mission. He didn’t want to see the same look of disappointment in her eyes he saw in everyone else’s, or the grief he had witnessed with the widows.

  “I bare my soul but you get to brush me aside, is that how this works? If you won’t talk to me, how am I supposed to trust you? One thing Shawn never did was treat me as a lesser being because I was the twins’ nanny, and I won’t stand for you to do that to me either.”

  “I’m not.” He ran a hand over his head, feeling the buzz cut under his fingers. “What do you want me to say? I led my men into an ambush, two of them were killed on-site, and a third is now an amputee because of my decision. That’s what sent me down the spiral of doubt. Will that make you sleep better tonight, knowing I failed them?”

  “Mac—”

  “Don’t.” Without looking back, he headed for the door. “I need some air.” He had to get away from her before he made things worse, or before he could see what he expected to find in her eyes. There was no way he could stand to look at her every day if she thought he was a failure.

  Most of the time, his men didn’t look at him that way, but it didn’t stop the guilt from that day affecting every decision he made on missions. Next time, he could get them all killed and he couldn’t allow that. He had a duty to bring his team home; each of them had someone waiting for them. It wasn’t just Ace and Boom’s wives and children, each of his men had family and friends. People who would need him to look into their eyes and tell them what happened. He couldn’t, wouldn’t, do it again. He’d bring his men home, or he’d die on the battlefield with them.

  Cold to the very core, Nicole was unsure how to handle Mac’s outburst. She wanted to go to him, but at the same time she couldn’t help but feel as if this was a battle they had to cross before anything could develop between them. They needed to be on solid footing for a friendship, for any kind of relationship. Lies or secrets would only make things more difficult further down the line.

  What the hell am I doing? I’m only the girls’ nanny, that’s all he’ll see me as. He only wants me in Virginia so he can stay a SEAL. She cursed herself for thinking she might be able to have a relationship with him. She was far too geeky once men started to get to know her, and she never attracted men like that. There was no doubt in her mind. Men like Mac went after cute little blondes with perky breasts, and stick figure bodies. That was something she could never compete with—her brown hair and eye combination was nothing spectacular, but it was the curvy figure that also pushed men away. She learned long ago some men didn’t appreciate a body that had what her grandmother called childbearing hips, extra curves, and a little more to love.

  Friendship was all she could hope for with Mac, and it was what they needed in order to raise the girls together. She rose from the sofa, grabbed the baby monitor, and with determination, set out to find him. Before she finished packing for Virginia, she had to let him know that she was sorry. She wasn’t sure why it mattered so much that she had to do it then, instead of waiting until he had time to cool off, but everything in her told her she needed to do it now. That he had to know that his confession didn’t change things.

  She didn’t even make it around the sofa before her cell phone started to vibrate in her pocket. Tempted to ignore it, she took another step before she forced herself to at least look at the caller ID. Mom.

  Shit. She knew what her mom was calling about and the calls wouldn’t stop until she answered. It was better to get it over with while Mac wasn’t around, so she slid her finger over the screen and brought it to her ear. “Hi, Mom.”

  “I’m sure the guardian who was appointed for those children has arrived. When are you coming home?” With no hello or how are you, her mother cut straight to the point.

  “I’m not.” She leaned against the back of the sofa. “I’m going to be away for a while.”

  “What?” Her mother’s voice rose another octave.

  “I’m going to Virginia with the girls’ guardian to help. It’s a hard time for them right now, and this will make it easier for them.” She didn’t explain that it might be a permanent solution.

  “I don’t know what’s gotten into you, girl, you gave up your successful career to care for some screaming brats. You’re ruining your life.” Her mother let out a deep sign. “It’s time you get your head out of the clouds, get back to work. Then you can find a man and have a family of your own instead of raising children who don’t even belong to you.”

  “Mom, I hated being an accountant.”

  “Then get married, have a bunch of babies, and stay home. Don’t go running off to help another man raise his unless you’re going to marry him.” She let her mother ramble on about how it was a woman’s place to marry and have children, and tried not to hold it against her. It was how she was raised, and there was no changing her mother.

  That was all she cared about, making Nicole an honest woman. Since the day she gave up her practice and moved in with Shawn there had been tension between them. The day Shawn died, her mother didn’t give her sympathies, or ask if there was anything her or the girls needed, instead all she wanted to know was when Nicole was moving back home.

  Well, it wasn’t happening, even if things didn’t work out in Virginia. She would never go back to her hometown and begin her accounting practice again. In just a few short months, this had become her home. If she had to rebuild her life, she’d do it here.

  I can’t think about it falling apart, this is my chance to stay in the girls’ lives. It’s what I want, and I’m not going so I can be near Mac…he’s just an added bonus.

  The Texas air was bone chilling in a way Mac hadn’t expected. When he thought of Texas, the first thing that came to mind was the heat, and even after all his years of traveling, Texas was one state he hadn’t marked off the list. With less than two weeks until Christmas, he didn’t expect to feel the same chill in the air as he did in Virginia. The air felt cold enough to snow, but that was rare, wasn’t it?

  He sunk down on the steps of the porch and pulled out his phone. Christmas. Guilt, regret, and undying sadness poured through him. The first Christmas alone for the families of the two SEALs he’d gotten killed. He flicked through the pictures on his phone until he found the one of the men together, taken just days before the mission that changed the team forever.

  The minute they stepped out of their Humvee and headed to the door of
what they were told was an informant’s house, the gunfire erupted all around them. There had been no safe place to take cover and the vehicle was too far. They hunkered down the best they could and returned fire. Every time they took out an insurgent, two more took its place. A fucking setup, and they were on their own. No backup was coming to get them out of the ambush they’d walked into. After twenty years in the military, he should have known better. Faulty intelligence got two of his men killed, another disabled, but it could have got them all killed.

  “Commander…” The urgency in Bad Billy’s tone cut through the gunfire.

  Mac had turned his head enough to glance at Bad Billy from the corner of his eye, and what he saw sent a new rush of anger through him. “Fuck!” He grabbed James’s ballistic vest and tugged him closer to the wall. Blood stained the ground around them red. “Rebel!”

  “I got him, Sir.” The team’s medic, Rebel, pulled his pack out and reached for the tourniquet first. “Stay with us, James, you hear me? Stay with us.” His tone held insistence; it was a demand, as if to tell James he had no other choice but to live. He hurriedly tied off the arteries to cut the blood flow.

  “Goddamn it, don’t you fucking die on me.” Mac looked around to assess the damage to his team. Two were missing. “Where’s—” He didn’t finish his sentence before Bad Billy pointed farther down the line.

  “Britt is in a bad place, but Rebel did what he could.”

  He glanced at Britt’s pale face. “Ace, Boom, get a smoke screen ready. We’ve got to get back to the Humvee. Rebel, can you move him?”