East of Ashes

by Gideon Nieuwoudt

  "With all that wood they’d only have to throw a burning ember into your house and poof, you'll be gone," she answered with a pointed look.

  "Oh you'd like that, wouldn't you?" he shot back with laughter in his eyes, as he came to a standstill in front of her.

  She sniffed the air with a deep frown, "Mind you, I think they'll have to stand at a distance and catapult a burning log through your window, because they won't be able to come near you, stinking like you do."

  "Oh I stink, do I?" he laughed. "Well, then we'll make a great team because you smell too!"

  "Oh I do not!" she exclaimed, and hit him with a balled fist on his arm.

  Joash laughed uproariously, which only made her hit him harder.

  "I didn't say you stink!" he laughed, as he fended off her punches, "I said you smell - rather nice, I guess I should have added."

  Smiling broadly, he caught her arms and held them, preventing her from punching him further.

  "Yes, you should have!" she said, her smile faltering at the nearness of him.

  Joash gently let her arms go and took a small step back, increasing the space between them. A pained look flashed in his eyes, but it happened so quickly that Leala wasn't sure she really saw it.

  Joash cleared his throat. "So, to what do I owe this unexpected visit?" he asked.

  "I have a slight problem."

  "Ah, a problem. Yes, it's only natural for you to come running to me with your problems," Joash said, the humour back in his voice. He heaved a sigh as he shook his head from side to side in mock exasperation.

  "You're unbearable!" Leala laughed.

  "I know, I know - and don't forget humble," Joash said with a grin.

  "Sir, oh sir, could you please rescue this wee bitty damsel from the monsters pursuing her," Leala said, batting her eyes as she clasped her hands in front of her. "Oh please sir, you're so strong and dashing!"

  "Fine, fine, you win!" Joash laughed.

  Grinning, Leala dropped her hands to her sides.

  "Well then, would you be so kind as to accompany me to my humble lodgings for some refreshment," Joash asked with exaggerated formality, holding out a bent arm. "And then you can tell me all about these terrible monsters."

  Leala hooked her arm in his and they walked to his house.

  "All jokes aside, I'm having trouble deciding whether a certain someone might be a monster," she said, then chided herself for sounding so melodramatic.

  "This sounds good," Joash said smiling.

  "Oh be serious!" she laughed, exasperated.

  "Fine, fine, I'll be serious for a little bit," he smiled. "Right, monster - who are we talking about?"

  She hesitated for a moment, slightly dropping her chin towards her chest as she collected her thoughts.

  "It's Lamech," she finally answered.

  "Lamech? But he's not a monster!" Joash said surprised. "Granted, the man needs to learn how to smile, but I don't think he's all that bad."

  "That's the problem with you Joash; you always see the best in people."

  "Only because everyone deserves to be given the benefit of the doubt," he answered. "Besides, I've got a good feeling about Lamech. I think one of these days the Lord is going to get his attention and, boy, I'd love to see the man he's going to become!"

  "So you think he's safe?" she asked.

  "Well, safe is a bit relative, isn't it? I mean, I'm not saying the man is exactly Captain Dependable - yet - but he's definitely got something that makes me think that once upon a time he was a very noble man - someone with a lot of integrity. But now it's buried below layers of... well, pain and anger. If those could be removed though...", Joash whistled a stretched-out note, "That'll be something to see."

  "Fine. Try this then: would you trust your life to him?" she asked.

  Joash grew silent for a moment as they reached the cottage. He opened the door and then stood aside to let Leala enter first. He closed the door behind them, and then pulled out a chair for her at the table. Satisfied that she was comfortable, he walked over to the shelves to take down some wine and two cups.

  "I think so, yes," he finally said, while he poured the wine into the cups. "He hasn't done anything that would make me think he wishes ill towards me."

  Watching his reaction closely, Leala sprang her trap: "And would you trust my life to him?"

  Joash faltered for a split second in pouring the wine.

  "Right, now you'll need to explain," Joash said, and put the wine down. He took the two cups and walked over to the table. He handed the one cup to Leala and then dragged a chair closer for himself.

  "I bumped into him this morning when I went for a walk in the forest."

  Joash groaned and leaned forward, resting his head on the table.

  "I've told you a thousand times that it's not safe for you to walk alone in the forest," he said, looking up at her.

  "I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself," she retorted irritably.

  "Look, I'm not saying that. It's just not a good idea to walk alone in the forest right now. I've told you about all the villages being attacked of late."

  When she continued to scowl, he added: "I just don't want anything to happen to you."

  Leala softened at his words. There might just be something there after all, she thought.

  "Lamech had similar thoughts on the matter - specifically with regards to our impending visit to Arles," she answered.

  "Did he now?" Joash asked.

  "Yes. He seemed to think it would be safer if he accompanied us. He's probably right - you're both probably right," she added when Joash lifted his eyebrows, "It's just... I'm not sure it's such a good idea."

  "Well, he's not bad with a sword," Joash said with a grin. Leala laughed at the understatement and the brief tension between them evaporated.

  "That he's not," she smiled, "I'm just not entirely sure about his motives."

  "Why, what's there to be unsure of?" Joash replied, still grinning. "The most beautiful girl in the whole world is dashing off with a likeable rogue to a neighbouring village, while bandits roam the countryside. If I was him I'd be extremely jealous and wish to put an end to it."

  Her heart clenched at his words.

  "Actually, I do think he might have his eye on me," she said softly, watching him closely. She was not disappointed as that same look that she thought she saw earlier flashed in his eyes.

  "Anyway, the point is: do we trust him enough to accompany us to Arles?" she asked quickly.

  "I think so," Joash answered, then hesitated for a moment in thought.

  "Look, if we do run into trouble then we'll have an extra sword. Mind you, he can probably sort out any bandits by himself and then we can run ahead and wait for him to catch up," he added with a grin.

  "I guess that settles it then," Leala smiled. "I hope you're right though," she added, her smile waning, "because I'm beginning to get a bad feeling about this whole trip."

  How then shall they call on Him

  in whom they have not believed?

  And how shall they believe in Him

  of whom they have not heard?

  And how shall they hear

  without a preacher?

  Romans 10:14 (NKJV)

  CHAPTER 3

  --- Avignon, September 1097 ---

  It took them three days to get ready. Joash hadn't believed it possible, but when the other villagers heard they were heading for Arles, everybody seemed to have something they wanted to send along to trade at the market, or a message that needed to be delivered.

  While Joash and Leala were inundated with requests, Lamech kept to himself. The scowl on his face and his hand always resting on his sword hilt resulted in everyone giving him a wide berth.

  So instead of travelling on horseback as planned, they were forced to take a wagon. Lamech bluntly refused to give up his horse though, which he was now riding a couple of paces ahead of the wagon. Joash had resigned himself to riding on the wagon with Leala.

&nbs
p; Leala was hoping it wasn't such a big sacrifice on Joash's part. Lamech seemed to be sure of it though, judging by the sullen posture he struck on his horse a few metres ahead of them.

  "He's not very happy, is he?" she quietly observed to Joash.

  "I believe you're right," he answered. "The man sure knows how to show when he's in a foul mood."

  "That's not what I meant," she laughed, then added softly when Lamech glanced over his shoulder: "I mean, generally speaking, he's not a very happy person."

  "Oh. Right. Yes, he's bottling up a lot inside, that's for sure."

  "What do you think caused it?" Leala asked, staring at Lamech's back.

  "I've got no idea," Joash replied, then shrugged: "But I guess if he wanted to share that kind of stuff with us, he would."

  Leala smiled quietly at him. "What did you think I meant?"

  "When?" he asked innocently, scrambling to cover up his slip.

  "Just now, when I said he's not very happy?"

  "Well... I just thought you meant he was unhappy about something. Oh never mind, you're just looking for an excuse to laugh at me."

  Leala laughed at the sheepish grin on his face, but didn’t needle him any further.

  Ahead of them, Lamech turned his horse to the side and waited for them to catch up. When they drew alongside he gently spurred his horse to keep pace with the wagon.

  "I don't mean to be a bore, but I suggest you keep it down," he said with as much politeness as he knew how to scrape together.

  When they looked at him blankly, he added: "The area we're going through right now is not a very safe one and I don't want to draw attention."

  "You're right, sorry," Leala answered. She hesitated for a moment: "But why don't you tell us something about yourself, then we'll keep quiet?"

  Lamech looked at her without saying anything as she smiled at him sweetly.

  She didn't blink an eyelid: "Please?"

  She's magnificent, Joash thought. And he's going to answer her too. He was surprised to discover as he watched the internal battle raging on Lamech's face.

  "Such as?" Lamech finally responded.

  "Anything; something we won't know unless you told us yourself."

  Lamech rode on in silence for a while, deep in thought. Finally he looked up at Leala, his head tilted at a slight angle as he gazed at her.

  "Did you know that my father was a bishop?" he asked.

  Surprise rang its bell all over Joash and Leala's faces as they looked at him in amazement.

  "No, I didn't think so," Lamech said. Normally he would have stopped there, satisfied at having silenced them. But he couldn’t stop the words spilling out of his mouth.

  "The problem is that he was a bishop, but not a Godly man. Nor were the men around him. Not the best example for a boy growing up."

  He was heating up at the very thought: "In fact, after a while I didn't want anything to do with him or his God. And I still don't - assuming of course He even exists"

  "Is that why you're so angry all the time?" Leala asked bluntly.

  Joash wasn't sure who was the most shocked, Lamech or himself. After looking at her with more pain in his eyes than Joash had thought possible, Lamech gently spurred his horse forward and resumed riding ahead of them.

  "Nice. Very well played," Joash said to Leala with a sideways glance.

  She didn't answer for a long time.

  "I shouldn't have asked that," she finally admitted softly, sadness in her voice. "I was just burning to know why he was always so angry - and then I just blurted it out."

  Joash glanced at her as she stared straight ahead. She means well, but sometimes her mouth runs ahead of her senses. He usually found it endearing but looking at Lamech's slightly dejected back, he couldn't help but wish she had held her tongue.

  "Well," he sighed, "let's hope he doesn't decide to desert us right now because I don't think he was joking about this place."

  They didn't speak for a long time after that, both of them lost in thought as they wondered what nightmares could be haunting their companion.

  -------

  It grew dark quickly that evening - or so it seemed to the three travellers, almost as if the sun was in a hurry to depart the world of man and settle into its night-time resting place.

  In its stead the moon rose into the heavens, casting its brilliance down upon the earth as the sounds of the night filled the air.

  Lamech had insisted that they steer well clear of the road when making camp. The other two didn't see any reason to argue. So in a small little clearing a couple of hundred paces off the main road, the three of them were gathered around a crackling fire, weary after the day's journey.

  After sharing a quiet and subdued supper, they sat staring into the flames in silence, each lost in their own thoughts.

  Lamech had not said a word since their confrontation on the road, except for his terse insistence on where they should make camp for the night. His mood affected the other two, who had conversed quietly but were careful not to give Lamech the impression that they were gossiping about him.

  Leala, still curious to find out more about this enigma of a man, stole a glance at Lamech. She wanted to say something, but she was afraid she might shut him up for good.

  So she was surprised when Joash broke the silence - and jumped right in.

  "Lamech, on the road this afternoon - we didn't mean to pry."

  Leala watched Joash closely, love swelling inside of her. He was always worried about others. Sometimes it irritated her, but looking at him now she realised again he wasn't acting out of weakness or vain conceit - he really cared.

  "It's just... we hardly know you and we want to get to know you a little better," he continued hesitantly. "We're sorry if we upset you."

  Lamech stared quietly into the fire as if he hadn't heard him. Joash and Leala glanced at each other, worried that Lamech was going to ignore their peace offering.

  But then he answered quietly: "Thank you."

  He looked at them, watching their faces. It was clear they were holding their breath in the hope that he'd say something more. But uttering the words he so desperately wanted to, seemed physically impossible. Even though he could get his mouth open, it felt like the words themselves didn't want to formulate, refusing to come out of the garbled clouds of his mind whenever he came too close to voicing what he was hiding.

  "I know you didn't mean to upset me. It's... not a topic I've ever spoken about to anyone."

  He hesitated briefly, then shrugged and continued: "To be quite honest, I don't even know why I said what I said this afternoon. So for now... please don't ask me about it any further," he asked, his truthfulness surprising all of them, himself included.

  "Of course," Joash answered, then added after a moment's thought: "I know this might sound insincere, but really, if you change your mind and want to talk to someone about it... well, I just want you to know that it would be an honour."

  Lamech looked at him sharply for any hint of being mocked, but then relaxed when he saw they were both sincere.

  "Thank you... I appreciate that," he replied.

  Breathing easier, Joash and Leala smiled as the tension in the air eased considerably.

  "So tell me again why we're going to Arles?" Lamech asked.

  "Why? Are you worried that we might be up to something?" Leala asked, mischief glinting in her eyes.

  "Not really. I just like to know what to expect," he replied, apparently either oblivious to the humour in her voice, or choosing to ignore it.

  Leala cleared her throat and then answered: "Well, you needn't worry - it's going to be as uneventful a time as you can imagine."

  "I haven't seen my cousin in more than a year and we just want to do some catching up," she continued.

  Joash raised his eyebrows: "Sounds like fun..."

  Leala punched him on the shoulder. "You two can go and do something else!" she exclaimed.

  "But I was looking forward to some gossip!" Joash teased,
winking at Lamech as he kept Leala's punches at bay with his one hand. When he saw Lamech’s face, he burst out laughing.

  "And clearly I'm not the only one!"

  Leala stopped trying to punch Joash and looked at Lamech too. She started giggling when she saw the frown on his face.

  Lamech's frown slowly disappeared as he watched them breaking into a laughing fit. His frown soon gave way to a smile of his own but it didn’t go any further. He wished he could join them, but the laughter simply wasn’t there.