by Brooks, Tori
His voice came from her left and a small rectangle of light from Dev’s cell phone lit up. Letting the door swing shut, she made her way to him in the dim light. Dev leaned on his uninjured shoulder, propping himself up to see her better. She kicked off her boots and unzipped his sleeping bag. Dev was in shorts and a T-shirt, while she had sweats on over her camisole. She pulled off her sweatshirt and slid off her pants. With only her camisole and underwear on now, Macy climbed into the sleeping bag beside Dev.
“Um –”
“Don’t start,” Macy ordered. It was a snug fit and she couldn’t zip the bag up again.
“Fine. Climb over, trade me sides.”
Dev turned off his phone and shifted underneath her as she climbed over him. She didn’t really expect him to let her stay, let alone be a gentleman about it and shield her from the draft.
“To what do I owe the pleasure?” Dev sounded amused. He was propped up on his other elbow, putting strain on his gunshot wound.
“Is that hurting?” Macy eyed the bandage around his arm.
“It’s not too bad, just a graze really. I took a couple Tylenol earlier and I’ll live. Don’t tell me you walked over here and climbed into bed with me to ask me that.”
“No. I just –” She stopped, not knowing exactly why she was there or how to explain it. Dev waited for a moment, but she just shook her head.
“Imogen still a zombie?”
Macy nodded.
“Paige still freaked out?”
She nodded again.
“And she’s not going to miss you?”
“I need to be here.”
He hesitated, then nodded. “Kenny?” Dev called back over his shoulder. “Paige could use a strong male presence. Take tissues.”
“Yeah.” Kenny’s resigned voice crossed the tent and Macy heard him get up. He tossed his sleeping bag on Dev before leaving the tent.
“Stay,” Macy whispered when Dev sat up to grab the second bag. He looked at her, then turned his attention to Kenny’s bag. Unzipping it all the way, he opened it and spread it as a blanket on top of them. He kicked the zipper of his own bag open down to the feet to give them more room.
Lying down beside Macy again, Dev looked at her curiously. They didn’t have this kind of relationship, he probably wondered what she was doing here.
“I was thinking about what happened,” she began, unsure of how to articulate her thoughts.
“It’s been on my mind all day.”
“You risked your life. Everyone’s life.”
“Yeah, it was stupid. I didn’t think, I just reacted.”
“Would you do it again?”
“Yes,” he said without hesitation. “You know what they were going to do.”
“Yes.” They were quiet for a moment. “I feel safer with you.”
He laughed. “We have the local military surrounding the camp and patrolling. Not to mention the rebels, or whoever they were, probably don’t even know what happened yet. Even if they did, they’d have to plan a response.”
“Will they come after you?”
Dev shook his head. “Doubtful. They weren’t looking for us specifically. They were just after American tourists they could ransom. When they found our passports they probably called all the names in to someone to look up who we were. Must have thought they hit the jackpot.”
“So if you weren’t a successful rock band, or weren’t there, they would have ransomed us?”
“Probably. I think Marza figured he was going to get enough for the four of us, five with Bren, that he could afford to keep you three; take home a prize and money. It doesn’t matter, no one survived. It wasn’t that they weren’t prepared, we just lucked out. Lieutenant Mumba was tracking them, and caught up to us at a very convenient time. And without witnesses. I suspect that’s why we’re going all the way back to Dodoma. If they want to just get us to safety, Moshi’s fine. Ditto if they just want to get us out of the country; there’s an airport in Moshi. Mumba doesn’t have to fly us to the capital if he just wants to make sure we’re safe. I think the government, at some level, is going to convince us to keep quiet.”
Convince them to keep quiet? Macy didn’t like the sound of that. Convince them how? Threaten them? Torture them? She felt her body shaking, but couldn’t stop it. Dev lay back and his arms encircled her, pulling her close.
“Macy, it’ll be fine. We can’t just disappear, it’ll raise public speculation. Rock band hikes Kilimanjaro and disappears without a trace? It’s not good for tourism. Not when there are easier ways. It’s not realistic that we all wandered off a cliff, this mountain’s too tame.
“Someone will present a reasonable argument why none of this should come to light and we’ll agree. The official story will be something like a member of the expedition was injured and we had to turn back. Altitude sickness maybe. It’s possible we’ll admit to the guide being injured or killed. There’ll be a cover-up, a mildly interesting blurb in the press maybe, but nothing worth repeating.”
“You were shot,” Macy pointed out.
“That would be more than mildly interesting and worth repeating. It would get the wrong attention if it leaked I was shot. Officially, I wasn’t. I fell or something. Don’t worry about it, just go along with whatever we agree on and stick to it. It only takes one snooping reporter to blow a good story.”
“So an experienced guide walked off a cliff? Sure, no one’s going to notice that. Oh, and he took the porters with him.”
“Nothing that dramatic, but anyone who knew Raul would assume he died trying to save an idiot tourist. You’ve met Jess, it’s believable. No one will question the porters. They’ll pay off the families. What I’m saying is: whatever they come up with, just go with it.”
“Did Mumba tell you this?”
“No. Kenny and I talked on the hike. Tanzania’s been pretty stable, but we overheard the soldiers talking and at least some of the general’s men came from Malawi. It’s a poor country with a lot of problems. Around here, people do what they have to sometimes. I knew it before we came, but we’re on the other side of the country from the Malawian border, so I didn’t think about it.
“President What’s-His-Name in Dodoma won’t want it known militant Malawians crossed the border and width of his country. Plus they almost kidnapped tourists for ransom and recreation. They really won’t want that bit getting out, it sets a whole different set of radical save-the-world groups on edge. This whole thing will make him look weak and he can’t afford that. Policy is set by overthrowing governments on this continent. It’s a centuries-old tradition and he can’t afford to give anyone an excuse.”
“So they’ll hush it up, and we’ll let them.”
“Yes, Macy, we will. If we fuss, either we really will disappear or the U.S. government will be called in. I’d like to think the latter, but I can’t be completely certain.”
“That would make the President appear weak too though, wouldn’t it?” Macy asked.
“I’m not sure what the relationship is between the U.S. and Tanzania. Maybe. On the other hand, the U.S. wouldn’t want the incident known either for the same reasons. If it becomes public, they may have to get involved. The U.S. really doesn’t need to have its fingers in any more war zones.”
“You said they couldn’t make us disappear.”
“It’s better than having us tell, but not as good as simply having us quiet.”
Macy nodded. Dev’s T-shirt was damp from her crying, but his arms around her were comforting. She was right to come here, Macy decided. She felt better: calmer, safer, and warmer. Dev radiated heat and she snuggled to him closer. His musky scent reminded her that Dev was more than a friend, he was a man. A nice man, a strong one too. It aroused her.
Macy stopped to think before reacting to her primal impulse. She wanted him right now, but did she in the long run? So far they’d spent time together and there was no hint of chemistry or attraction. Dev was damaged. He was still in love with his ex who turned he
r back on him. Lindsay hurt him, badly. Macy understood, but wasn’t sure she wanted to deal with that.
Not to mention she still had her own problems, her dad and Peter came to mind. Getting back together with her own ex was a non-issue. She wasn’t going to put herself through that again just to please her father. Too bad Darcy, her little sister, was so much younger than her. Dad could set her up with Peter. Macy suspected her father would try it if he thought of it, although as pliable as Peter was, he wasn’t going to date a teenager.
The crunch of footsteps outside the tent made Macy cringe. Dev held her tighter.
“It’s only the patrol, you’re fine. Try to go to sleep,” he whispered.
“I can’t sleep. I ... I’m scared and wound up and ... and I need to…” She looked up toward Dev’s face. He shifted a little so he could see her.
“Need to what?”
Macy reached up and kissed him, weaving her fingers in his hair and rolling onto her back to pull him partially over her. Feeling Dev’s warmth and firm weight alongside her made her passion grow. Dev broke the kiss and looked down at Macy quizzically. He wasn’t angry, just surprised, maybe confused.
“That’s –”
She kissed him again, wriggling under him more. Dev pulled away.
“Talk to me,” he ordered.
“I need you.”
“When did this happen?”
“When you pulled me to my feet and held me while they cleaned your bullet wound. Maybe before, or after, but I ... I trust you. I feel safe here with you. It’s not the army, it’s you. I know you don’t just jump into things like this, so this is off the record. Never happened. Like everything else that happened today, or didn’t.”
“What?”
“This isn’t about relationships or love or commitment. This is about me falling apart and needing your strength. Maybe I can give you a bit of mine. It’s about working through a stressful situation. Please. Just go with it. Please?”
Tears ran from the corners of her eyes and fell back into her hair. He was going to say no. Dev would turn away, reject her, maybe even send her back to her own tent. She cried harder and said a silent prayer that he would understand.
Macy could barely see his face in the low light. His eyes shone though, wide and bright as he watched her. Then he closed them and bent his head down to kiss her. If she were standing, she would have collapsed in relief.
Dev’s tongue gently caressed hers, and his weight settled on her like a comforting hug. A hand ran down the side of her body, slowly settling at her waist. She opened her legs, wrapping one around his hip, inviting his touch.
Macy never considered Dev in a sexual context before now. His physicality was always overshadowed by her perception of him as a nice guy. His manhood pressing against her pelvis stiffened and grew as she rubbed against him, proving that even nice guys had hormonal reactions and desires.
Their kissing broke as both their breathing grew ragged. Dev nuzzled her neck, letting his hand feel her breast through the thin camisole. Her nipples weren’t the only thing hard, she pushed against him.
With a groan, Dev took the hint. He pushed his shorts down and pulled her panty aside. Positioning himself, he pushed into her slowly. Macy suspected he was holding back, but knew he’d let go shortly. She spread her knees farther apart and cradled his hips between her thighs. Her hands slid down his spine and pulled his lower back to her. Dev pulled back and thrust into her deeper. Nearly withdrawing, he thrust deeper still.
Macy arched her back, tilting her hips to invite him to continue. She moaned softly as he pushed hard against her, into her again and again. It was coming too fast, she wanted this to last, never stop, but the heat swelled inside her. She fought the orgasm, wanting more of him in her, longer, harder. They weren’t nearly sweaty enough and she loved the smell of him.
Dev clamped his mouth over hers as she climaxed, sudden and unexpectedly, muffling her scream of ecstasy. She wrapped her arms and legs around him, holding him close as he shuddered with his own silent orgasm. He exhaled, long and relieved after the pleasure released him. She brought his face to hers and kissed him. Dev cooperated with the kiss, increasing and returning the passion.
They kissed and cuddled and quietly explored each other’s body for another hour. As Macy lay in his arms, safe and sated, she remembered what she told Dev before. This isn’t about relationships or love or commitment.
She hoped he wasn’t going to hold her to that. Hurt and tormented by his ex or not, she wanted more.
○ ○ ○
Dev slept better than he thought he would. He had to admit Macy presented an effective solution for working through a stressful situation. Waking with her in his arms, wispy blond hair in his face tickling his nose, he realized how much he missed this. He wanted this again. He wanted Lindsay back.
Lindsay was gone, maybe it was time for him to admit that to himself. Kenny and Jess had told him enough, it should have sunk in by now. Even Bryan wasn’t convincing that he might win her back. Bryan wasn’t like Kenny and Jess, he knew what Lindsay meant to him. He even sat outside her bedroom door with Dev when he proposed. Kenny, Jess, and Lindsay never got along so it was easy for them to dismiss her, tell him to move on. But Lindsay was everything to him, and now she was gone.
It was like she died. No, Dev had experience losing people, this was worse than death. She had a choice, and she chose to reject him. She chose not to trust him, chose to throw away everything they built together. So why did he still want her?
Macy stirred, and he smoothed her hair as it tickled his jaw. Her hair was darker than Lindsay’s. Macy’s eyes were bluer. She was taller than Lindsay’s petite frame, but she felt good in his arms.
The realization that Lindsay could be replaced shook Dev. Macy stirred again. He carefully disentangled himself and slid away. Dressing quietly, he left the tent.
Squinting in the sunlight, Dev heard Kenny’s voice and followed it. He was sitting with Paige, gesturing wildly with anxiety on his face. He opted not to bother Kenny, whatever he was discussing with Paige seemed important.
Looking around, he found Bryan and Brenda sitting at a table with Imogen. A pair of soldiers were cleaning their weapons at the same table, but there was room for Dev to sit.
“What’s up with Kenny?” Dev asked, sitting down.
“Paige is upset. He’s trying to assure her it’ll all be okay,” Bryan answered. Brenda held Imogen’s hand and kept nudging a mug of coffee toward her. Bryan waved off Dev’s curious look, code for ‘don’t go there.’
Dev nodded and picked a shrink-wrapped package of dehydrated pears off the table and opened it. He was surprised last night to find he liked the freeze dried fruit packs. Sweet and mild with a texture that Jess likened to Styrofoam, the fact that they were of undetermined age didn’t dissuade Dev’s pleasure of biting into the crumbling bar of pressed pears. He resolved to see about finding some when he got home. Dev smiled to himself imagining the look on Frau Schmidt’s face at his new treat.
Dev heard Kenny say his name, and he turned to look. Kenny wasn’t looking at him, so apparently he was part of the conversation.
“Yeah, your name keeps coming up. Don’t worry about it,” Bryan sipped at his coffee.
“Something about me acting impulsively and risking everyone’s life? Had that conversation with Macy last night.”
“Don’t second guess yourself, it worked out. You took an opportunity and kept one of us from doing something else later. No harm done.”
“It would have turned out differently if our friends in fatigues here hadn’t shown when they did.” Dev stared off into the distance, reluctant to meet Bryan’s cool gaze.
“Maybe. You would have been shot again, I’d bet on that. Kenny was trying to get the gun away from the guy you pushed him towards, although that would have taken too long by his own admission. Jess was struggling to get out from under the guy you shot, he already had the rifle but he wasn’t in a position to shoot yet.
I was going for the general’s sidearm. He fell on top of it and I’d just rolled him over when I heard the other shots. Overall, I think most of us would have survived.
“It had to be done, Dev. None of us could have lived with ourselves if we’d let them take the girls. Don’t beat yourself up for making the first move.”
“Let Kenny and Paige do it for me?” He looked as the soldiers beside Imogen and Brenda got up and left the table.
“No. They’re actually talking about Macy wandering off to see you in the middle of the night, and you shooing Kenny back out to Paige’s tent.”
Dev groaned. “Was that the wrong call? I thought she wouldn’t want to be alone and Macy seemed determined to stay.”
“Wrong call? I hope not. Why? Didn’t things go well with Macy?”
“It’s fine.”
Bryan laughed. “Who are you trying to convince? That sounded weak.”
“It’s complicated.”
“Of course it is. I know you.” Bryan’s eyes flicked over Dev’s shoulder then back to his face. “Jess is coming. He’s grinning.”
Dev considered trying to make a run for it.
Jess sat beside Imogen, took her head in his hands, and looked her over carefully. He whispered something in her ear, and waited for a response. None came.
“No one’s home yet.” He sighed.
“Be patient with her,” Brenda chastised him. “She’s had a scare.”
“As have we all.” Jess turned his attention to Dev and grinned. “Well, I wasn’t watching, but your technique sounded effective.”
“Not discussing it with you,” Dev answered.
“Of course not.” Jess turned to Bryan. “Suppose he told you it’s complicated?”
Bryan nodded with a small smile.
“Un-complicate it,” Jess ordered Dev.
“None of your business,” Dev answered him.
“Figured I should get a vote since I was forced to witness the beginning of this budding relationship.”
Bryan laughed and shook his head at their incorrigible lead singer. Jess took the hint and went to join Kenny’s argument so Dev didn’t have to pursue the topic with him.