The Man She Should Have Married

by Patricia Kay

  Olivia couldn’t seem to look away, and for a long moment, their gazes held. She knew suddenly that Eve had been right. He was interested in her. Right now he was telling her something he couldn’t say out loud. She only hoped she hadn’t done or said anything to encourage him. Oh, Matt, she thought. Why did your name have to be Britton?

  After a few more seconds pregnant with unspoken tension, Matt sighed and shook his head. “Tell Austin Crenshaw if he needs anything, anything at all, to call me.”

  “Matt, I don’t want you sticking your neck out for me. You have a lot to lose, and if your mother—”

  “You have more to lose than I do. And never mind. You don’t have to tell Austin anything. I’ll call him myself.”

  A tremor passed through Olivia as their gazes met again. Right now she felt as though an avalanche was on its way, and no matter what she did, she would not be able to avoid its destruction.

  * * *

  Olivia dreamed of Matt again that night. The two of them were somewhere warm, an island maybe. In her dream, they were making love on a rumpled bed, with the sound of the ocean somewhere near.

  A warm breeze ruffled the sheer curtains, and wooden shutters were open to the fragrance of tropical flowers. Birds sang, and somewhere in the distance lilting guitars played irresistible melodies.

  She moaned as his hands explored and caressed her. The dream was so vivid, so real, that when they came together, she called out his name and woke up.

  Heart pounding, she sat up in bed. Disappointment coursed through her. She was alone, the same way she’d been for more than four years now. The lovemaking hadn’t been real. It could never be real. Not with Matt.

  She looked at her bedside clock. It was 4:48 a.m. She would never get back to sleep, she knew she wouldn’t. She had to get up at six o’clock anyway. Sighing, she tossed aside the light blanket, turned off the alarm and reached for her robe.

  Downstairs, moving quietly so as not to awaken Thea, she fixed herself a cup of coffee and took it into the living room where she sat in her favorite chair and watched the sky slowly lighten. By the time she was ready to go upstairs and shower, she’d come to a decision.

  Avalanche or no, she did not intend to allow anything to harm Thea, including her own foolish heart. She had to face it once and for all: loving Matt would come to no good.

  In fact, it would destroy them all.

  She couldn’t allow that to happen. She had to begin pulling away from him. It was the only option she had.

  * * *

  “Oh, there you are. I’ve been looking for you.”

  Matt turned at the sound of Jenna Forrester’s voice. As always, she looked impeccable and every bit the ideal ACDA—Assistant Criminal District Attorney—in her dark blue suit, tailored yellow blouse and sensible blue pumps, with her red hair swept back in a neat twist and secured by a gold clip. She was beautiful, smart and charming. He knew people felt she was the perfect partner for him. At one time, he’d thought so, too. Somehow, though, being perfect for him hadn’t been enough. He’d needed passion, too, and it hadn’t been there, no matter how much he might have wished it were.

  “Hey, Jenna. What’s up?” he said now.

  “Wanted to give you this.” She handed him a blue bound document.

  He quickly scanned it: a motion to suppress evidence found during a search of the home of a defendant he was prosecuting. “How’d you happen to have this?”

  She shrugged. “Guess they thought we were working together on the case.”

  Normally, they would have been. She had often been his second chair. But he’d been avoiding her since their breakup in August. “Thank you.”

  “You’re welcome.” She studied him for a moment. “You know, Matt, I’m not the vindictive sort.”

  “I know that.”

  “So stop avoiding me, then.”

  “Sorry. I thought it might be easier for everyone if—”

  “Easier for you, you mean,” she said, interrupting. Her smile was wry. “Seriously. There are no hard feelings.”

  He nodded, feeling like a bit of a heel. “I appreciate that.”

  “After all, why would there be? I mean, you can’t help how you feel. Or don’t feel. It’s just my bad luck, right?”

  Now there was an edge to her voice. Maybe she wasn’t quite as understanding as she’d been pretending to be. “Why don’t you just say it? I’m an idiot.”

  She chuckled. “You said it, not me.”

  “I’m sorry things have turned out this way, Jenna. You deserve better.”

  “Yes, I do. And I’m sorry, too. But I meant what I said. There are really no hard feelings.”

  “Thanks.”

  Their eyes met again, she gave him one last crooked smile, then waved goodbye and walked away.

  Matt sighed again. Damn. Why was life so messy? Jenna really was perfect for him, unlike his mother’s choice of Charlotte Chambers. Of course, Vivienne hadn’t thought so, because Jenna wasn’t in the same social circles. But none of that mattered, because neither woman was Olivia. And that was the problem, and always would be. Now that Olivia was in the same world and free to marry again, she was the only woman he wanted.

  He hated that she’d hired Austin Crenshaw to represent her. He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it ever since she’d told him. Last night, as they’d said good-night at her front door, he’d been tempted to bring up the subject again, but he’d held off because he didn’t want to upset her any more than she already was. Bad enough his mother bullied her. Olivia didn’t need him bullying her, too.

  But today, he decided he at least needed to reassure himself that Austin Crenshaw really would do a good job for her. So as he walked back to his office, he pulled out his cell and called Olivia. The call went directly to voice mail. She was probably still at work herself.

  “Hey, Olivia, I was thinking. You said you were meeting with Austin Crenshaw tomorrow? I’d like to sit in at that meeting, because I’ll know what questions to ask him, and you might not. Also, I’ll be able to provide other information he might need. Call me back, okay?”

  Because he was disciplined and because he took pride in his work, he managed to mostly put her and the custody suit out of his mind until he heard back from her.

  She returned his call at six thirty. “I got your message.”

  He loved hearing her voice. “So it’s okay if I go with you tomorrow?”

  “I’m actually relieved you offered, because I probably wouldn’t know the right questions to ask. My appointment is for two o’clock at Austin’s office. Does that work for you?”

  Matt would have to juggle some appointments, but that was okay. “No problem. Why don’t I pick you up? We can go together.”

  She hesitated a few seconds. “Okay.”

  “I’ll be there by one thirty.”

  He was smiling when they hung up. She needed him, whether she knew it yet or not. And he was determined to make sure that didn’t change.

  Still smiling, he decided since he’d be gone several hours tomorrow afternoon, he’d better stay late tonight and make sure everything for the Murphy trial was ready for next week’s opening arguments.

  Chapter Six

  The smile had barely faded from Matt’s face when there was a knock at his office door. Matt looked up as the door opened and his boss, Carter Davis, walked in.

  “I’m glad I caught you,” Davis said. “Thought you’d probably already gone for the day. Then I saw your lights on.”

  Matt smiled. He liked Carter. More important, he respected him. “I still have some stuff I need to do before I call it a night.”

  Carter lifted some files off the leather chair facing Matt’s desk, put them on the floor and sat down. He studied Matt for a long moment.

 
Matt wondered what was up. Usually, when Carter wanted to see him, he summoned Matt to his office.

  “Been wanting to talk to you about something,” Carter finally said. His tone had turned solemn.

  “Okay.”

  “You made any final decision about running for the House?”

  Not sure where this was going, Matt decided to hedge. “I’m still mulling it over.”

  “But you’re leaning toward doing it?”

  Matt shrugged. “Truthfully? I’m not sure.”

  Carter nodded. “It’s a big step.”

  “Yes.”

  The two men looked at each other. Carter hesitated, tented his hands, then said, “I don’t like putting pressure on you, Matt, but I need you to make a decision, and soon. I’ve decided to retire the first of the year.”

  Even though Matt had expected something like this eventually, he was still a bit stunned. Carter had held the DA’s position for twenty-eight years. He was practically a fixture in Hays County.

  Seeing the expression on Matt’s face, Carter smiled. “The governor will ask for my recommendation on a replacement to fill in until the next election. My pick would be you. And I know he would appoint you in the interim, but if you decide to go for the House and don’t want to be DA, then I’ll recommend someone else.”

  Matt let out a breath. Although he’d heard the rumors, he hadn’t really expected Carter to retire this soon. That was one of the reasons he’d been receptive to the run for the House seat instead. At least be honest with yourself. You were receptive because you were flattered. But now the flattery part has worn off, and reality has set in.

  “I know people have been speculating, so you must have thought about this possibility,” Davis said.

  “Yes.”

  Davis studied him a few seconds longer, then got up. “I’ll give you a week or so to think about it, but I’d like your answer fairly soon. Need to get that ball rolling.”

  In that instant, Matt knew what his answer was going to be. To hell with what his family wanted...or what his friends thought. This was his life, the only life he had. And everything he really wanted was right here, in Crandall Lake, not thousands of miles away.

  But Matt wasn’t the type of person to jump into anything. So he’d take a few days to think everything over thoroughly before giving Carter his answer.

  But he couldn’t help feeling excited about the way his career situation was shaping up. Now if only his personal life would keep pace, he would be one happy man.

  * * *

  Why had she agreed to let Matt go with her? Especially after what she’d decided this morning.

  Yes, he’d be a help at the meeting, but she needed to begin standing on her own two feet, without relying on Matt so much. The more time she spent in his company, the harder it was to pretend they were only in-laws. She was afraid that one of these days she would give herself away by a word or a look. And then what?

  Even if Eve had been right and Matt did care for her the way she’d begun to care for him, it was a go-nowhere situation. And no one knew that better than Olivia.

  Why can’t you stick to your convictions? You should have told him no today.

  And yet, how could she? She didn’t want to hurt him. And really, he’d been right. It was a wise thing to have him along with her today, because she didn’t have a clue about what to ask Austin or whether he really was her best choice as a lawyer. Matt would be an invaluable help to her.

  And wasn’t Thea’s welfare and keeping her daughter safe more important than anything else right now?

  Of course, it was.

  So all Olivia had to do was put on her big-girl panties, keep that thought uppermost, and she would be fine.

  * * *

  Matt left his office at one o’clock Wednesday and pulled into the driveway at Olivia’s house shortly before one thirty. He’d barely rung her doorbell when the door opened. His heart squeezed at the sight of her. To him, she was more beautiful than any actress or model. Today she wore a dark blue dress with a simple string of pearls. The color emphasized the creaminess of her skin and the warmth of her eyes. It took all Matt’s willpower to stop him from reaching for her. He wanted, more than anything, to pull her into his arms and kiss her. He wanted it so badly, he was sure she could feel the need emanating from him.

  “Goodness,” she said, smiling a little. “You look so official.” Her gaze took in his dark pin-striped suit, white shirt and gleaming black shoes.

  “My work uniform,” he said, trying for a tone as casual as hers, even though the desire to touch her hadn’t diminished. He managed to assuage that a bit by helping her into his car and breathing in her subtle scent.

  “How’s work going?” she asked once he was buckled in and had started the car. “You hardly ever talk about it.”

  “In the office, we refer to our work situation as OOU.”

  “OOU? What does that mean?”

  He smiled. “Overworked, overwhelmed and understaffed.”

  She nodded. “Kind of sounds like the hospital.”

  “Just seems to be a fact of life most places nowadays.”

  “Can you afford to take this time off, then?”

  “I have personal time coming to me.”

  She didn’t answer, and Matt shot a glance at her. She was biting her lower lip. “Don’t worry about it, Olivia. It’s not a big deal.” He considered telling her about Carter Davis’s visit the previous evening, but decided this day was about her—her and Thea—not about him.

  After a moment, Olivia smiled. “Thank you. I appreciate your doing this.”

  “I’d do anything for you...and Thea. You know that, don’t you?”

  “I... Yes. I do.”

  “So quit worrying.” He knew she was always thinking about his mother and about not causing him trouble. One of these days, when the time was right, he would tell her everything, and do his best to make her understand that nothing she did or didn’t do would make one bit of difference to the way his mother felt about him—really felt about him. It never had. And it never would.

  * * *

  It was a short drive to Austin Crenshaw’s Crandall Lake office on the fourth floor of the First National Bank building on Main Street. They were silent as Matt pulled into the garage and parked. Five minutes later, they stood in Austin’s office, ten minutes early for Olivia’s appointment. The receptionist said she’d let Austin know they were there and disappeared into an inner sanctum.

  A few minutes later, Austin walked into the waiting room. He seemed taken aback to see Matt sitting there, but he recovered quickly and gave Matt a smile, although he greeted Olivia first, taking her hand and saying, “It’s good to see you again, Olivia. I’m only sorry about the reason.”

  “Thanks, Austin. I’m sorry, too.”

  Matt wished the man didn’t seem so damned confident. He looked every inch the successful lawyer in a midnight blue suit that was obviously a designer label, paired with a dark red tie. Austin Crenshaw also had the good fortune to bear a marked resemblance to his famous brother, with the same dimpled smile and lanky grace. The only differences Matt could see were his short, professional haircut and the color of his eyes—hazel instead of Adam’s much-written-about gray.

  “I feel sure everything will be all right, though,” Austin said. He was still holding Olivia’s hand. Still smiling down into her eyes.

  Matt had a childish urge to hit him. The feeling was so strong, he was afraid the emotion would show on his face.

  Austin finally let go of Olivia’s hand and turned to him. “I’m surprised to see you here, Matt,” he said. “Since you’re a member of the opposition camp.”

  “I don’t happen to share my parents’ feelings. I’m on Olivia’s side all the way in this and will do whatever I have to do to he
lp her.”

  “All right, then. Good. Let’s go into my office, shall we?”

  Austin took Olivia’s arm, leaving Matt to follow them. Matt gritted his teeth. Austin’s office was subtly elegant, with a jewel-toned Oriental carpet covering most of the hardwood floor, and classically designed furniture gracing its environs. Guiding Olivia to a rose-hued Queen Anne chair that was part of a grouping to one side of a shining mahogany desk, Austin took its mate next to her, leaving Matt to sit on the sofa facing them.

  This put Matt at a disadvantage because he was seated lower than they were—part of the group, yet not part of it. His resentment grew, even as he understood Austin’s strategy. The man was showing Olivia he was in charge, not Matt. In his shoes, Matt would have done the same.

  Now, along with the desire to punch out Austin’s lights, was a reluctant admiration. Clearly, Austin was a worthy adversary and certainly no fool. That he was interested in Olivia as more than a client was also evident because he hadn’t taken his eyes off her more than a few seconds since they’d arrived, and his gaze was filled with warmth and undisguised admiration.

  Although Matt was willing to concede the opening salvos to Austin, he knew it was time to take charge of this meeting and score his own points. “I’m sure you’ve done your research,” he said. “So you know that my parents have hired Jackson Moyer.”

  Austin grimaced. “Yes, I know.”

  “I have to be honest with you, Austin. I don’t think you’re the best choice to represent Olivia. I think she needs an attorney more familiar with family court and the issues involved. Someone closer to Moyer’s caliber. In fact, I recommended Paul Temple.”

  “I understand. But I can bring something to the case that Temple can’t.” Austin’s gaze rested on Olivia. He smiled at her. “I care about Olivia personally and her case will be my top priority.”

  If Matt wasn’t convinced before that Austin was thinking of Olivia as far more than a client, he was convinced of it now. And he also knew if he wanted a prayer of success with her himself, he didn’t have long to make his move. Although she might shoot him down, wasn’t that better than never taking a chance at all?