A Romance Rekindled (Heartsong Presents)

by Kimberly Rose Johnson

  He tightened his hold on her other hand. “You know I love you. I wish...” Had those words actually come out of his mouth? He shouldn’t have said that.

  Susan jerked her hand away and opened her mouth. Seconds ticked by as she stared at him, then she turned and fled.

  He watched her drive away with a piece of his heart. Yep, he should have kept his mouth closed.

  * * *

  Blake pulled the glass door toward him and stepped into the foyer. The door to the church office was open. He wiped sweaty palms on his jeans. He could do this. Pastor Lake had been friendly on the phone and encouraged him to stop by. Thankfully, Mitch had been able to give him a lift since he was taking Katie to their place anyway.

  He crossed the threshold into the office and spotted an empty chair behind a desk. “Hello?”

  “Ahem.”

  Blake’s heart jumped, and he turned toward the open door as fast as his sore body would move. “Hi, Pastor. I didn’t hear you.”

  “You must be Blake. The man held up a large paper cup with a lid and straw on top. “I took a walk and got a soda.” He stepped past Blake and pushed open another door into an adjoining room. “You coming?”

  “Right behind you.” The pastor’s casual attire and attitude had thrown him off balance, but he quickly recovered.

  The man had a nook set up with two black leather club chairs and a small table beside a large bookshelf. He sat in the chair next to the table and set his cup down. Blake followed and eased into the other one.

  “Thanks for seeing me on such short notice. Like I mentioned, a friend suggested I call.”

  “That’s right, so how about you tell me what’s going on.”

  “You want the long or short story?”

  “I have time. Better start from the beginning.”

  Blake told him everything. Including how he’d lived here years ago when his parents had kicked him out after he graduated from high school. “The day I received the phone call about their deaths I went into panic mode. I called off my wedding, packed a bag and left town. I haven’t been back until this summer.”

  “What about all your stuff?” Pastor Lake leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees.

  “I listed my house with a property management company and the personal items I needed I had shipped. Everything else was either deemed part of the rental package or locked away in a closet for me to deal with when I returned.” He looked down. “It turned out to be six years before I came back.” He continued on with his story and an hour later he sat back and took a deep breath. His limbs felt like mush, as if he’d just run a marathon.

  “Sounds like you’ve had a rough road to travel, but there’s hope. I’d like to pray with you if that’s all right.”

  Blake nodded and bowed his head.

  “Lord, I thank You for this brother, and for his attitude of surrender. When we are weak You are strong and we believe that You will give Blake the strength and wisdom to get through this rough patch. Please guide my words and our conversation. Amen.”

  Blake looked up. “Thanks.” Pastor Lake seemed to get him. He squared his shoulders. “So, what do you recommend?” He was desperate to have Katie back to her new normal—a regular kid.

  “When I counsel people, I usually don’t tell them what to do, but this is different. I believe your sister needs to understand that you are there for her and that her sticking so close won’t change that. Of course she understands death since she’s had to deal with the loss of your parents, but it seems to me she’s holding on extratight because of your accidents. She fears losing you, too. None of us is guaranteed our next breath, but she needs to feel secure regardless of your mortality.”

  “How do I do that?”

  Over the course of the next thirty minutes, the man offered a few ideas that felt doable. “Most important, keep the lines of communication open. She needs to know that you will listen to her. What do you think?”

  Blake blew out his breath and rose. “I’ll do my best.”

  “That’s all we can ever do.” The pastor reached out his hand. “I hope to see you in church on Sunday. I’d love to hear if things have improved.”

  “Okay.” He didn’t know how he’d get there, since he was currently carless, but he’d figure something out. After all, the man had listened to him for the past hour, he could at least listen to the pastor for thirty minutes on Sunday. Besides, Katie would be happy to come back.

  Blake stood and so did the pastor.

  “You know, Blake, God wants us to give Him our burdens. 1 Peter 5:7 says to cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”

  “Yeah, but that’s easier said than done.” Blake checked his watch. He needed a ride home, and Susan’s office was within walking distance. Maybe she’d be willing to give him a lift. He hadn’t seen or heard from her since he’d declared he loved her, and although he was a patient man, he needed to know where they stood. “Thanks for the help, Pastor. See you Sunday.”

  “My pleasure, and, Blake...I’ll be praying.”

  “Thanks.” He walked out the side door and set an easy pace as he stayed on the sidewalk along Highway 2. Cars crawled past him heading toward Stevens Pass. The sun continued to warm the day in the cloudless blue sky. The reader board at the bank said the temperature was eighty-eight degrees. This walking thing kind of stank, but it’d be worth it to see Susan.

  Fifteen minutes later, he opened the door to Susan’s office and cool air enveloped him. Susan sat at her desk. She looked up, her eyes widened.

  “Glad I caught you.”

  She straightened and folded her hands, resting them on her desk. “Oh?”

  “Yes.” He sauntered over to the empty guest chair and sat. “I took your suggestion and went to see Pastor Lake about Katie.”

  A small smile touched her lips. “How’d it go? Was he helpful?”

  “We’ll see. Honestly, just getting Katie to agree to go to Emily’s so that I could meet with him was a step in the right direction.”

  “I imagine so. I hope things work out.”

  “Me, too. I’m sure with time, Katie will be back to herself. Hey, I was hoping to bum a ride off you. My Jeep won’t be ready for another week.”

  “Your Jeep wasn’t totaled?”

  “Probably should’ve been, but it’s practically brand-new and only the driver’s side was damaged. So, it’s getting repaired in Wenatchee.”

  She nodded and pursed her lips. “I need to finish up this account. I suppose I could take you home after.”

  * * *

  Susan reminded herself to breathe as she waited for his answer. A part of her wanted him to leave, but a bigger part wanted him to stay.

  “Sure. That sounds great.”

  “Okay.” She motioned to a leather couch in the spot beside the door. “Have a seat over there.” She’d never get done with him sitting directly across from her. At least a little more space would separate them if he waited beside the door.

  He stood up and sauntered over to the couch, but not without first studying the local photographs she’d had matted and framed on the walls. “These are great. Did you take them?”

  “No, I picked them up at a local gallery.”

  “Nice.”

  Susan tried to ignore him and focus on the numbers on the computer screen, but the tension in the room was as thick as a clump of clay. No way would she be able to get anything accomplished while he was here. She glanced toward Blake and caught him watching her. “What?” Her heart beat like a drum drawing her toward him. She shook her head. She couldn’t allow that. Then again...

  “Nothing. Just admiring the frown lines on your forehead.” He smirked.

  She searched her desk for something to throw at the man, but came up empty. The wastebasket caught her eye
and she reached in for a crumpled paper then flung it at him. He dodged to the left, effectively evading the paper ball.

  A grin lifted his lips. “What?” He shrugged. “You were frowning.”

  Susan froze, realizing she was laughing for the first time in a while and it was because of Blake. It felt nice to laugh, but her feelings for Blake were so mixed up. Maybe friendship was what she was feeling. Yes—that had to be it. But she never wanted to kiss her male friends the way she wanted to kiss him. What was happening to her?

  She saved the file and closed down the computer. It would mean starting a little early tomorrow—better than messing up because she was too distracted. “Let’s go.”

  He raised a brow. “So soon? I thought—”

  “I’ll finish tomorrow.” She grabbed her bag and flipped off the lights then pulled the door open. “After you.” She locked up then turned. Blake leaned against the post with a lazy smile.

  “What?”

  “Nothing. Just admiring the view.”

  Susan rolled her eyes. “Well stop, or you can walk home.” She moved past him and strode toward the parking lot, her pulse pounding in her ears. He caught up and sauntered beside her, though she noticed a wince every now and then. “Do you need to stop anywhere before I take you home?”

  “It’s out of your way, but if you don’t mind, I need to pick up a few things at Safeway.”

  “No problem. I should stop there myself.” She unlocked the car with the remote and slid in, dropping her purse behind the passenger seat.

  Blake folded in beside her. “I really appreciate this.”

  Susan started the engine and backed out. From the look on Blake’s face, he had something to say. She wasn’t sure she wanted to know what he was thinking, but whatever it was it must be a doozy since he still hadn’t spoken.

  Chapter 17

  Blake stared out the side window of Susan’s car wishing the late-afternoon traffic would clear as they crawled along Highway 2. He’d hoped to ask her if she had any feelings for him, but something about the way she held herself gave him pause. He couldn’t name it, but there was a difference in Susan today, and he liked it. There was no sense in messing with a good thing.

  “Is Katie staying the night with Emily?”

  “No. I was lucky she even agreed to a few hours. She’ll be home after dinner.”

  “I hope you’re able to help her. I can’t imagine what it’s doing to her clinging to you all the time.” She shot him a mischievous smile.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” He pretended to be offended. “I’ll have you know I’m a perfectly clingable person. Anyone should be pleased to stick with me.”

  The tinkle of Susan’s laugh filled the car. “Oh, please!”

  He sobered thinking about Katie. Hopefully, Pastor Lake’s tips would help, because if they didn’t...

  Susan made a left at the light to Safeway and a moment later, parked. “Would you like to share a cart?”

  “Sure.” He’d hoped to shop together. He tossed Katie’s favorite cereal in the cart and a box of his favorite, too. It didn’t escape him that they were behaving like a married couple. It was his own fault that they weren’t married, but he hoped to change that. “I’m going to pick up fried chicken from the deli.”

  “Yum.”

  “I could buy enough for all three of us.”

  Her eyes lit, and she nodded with a hesitant smile. “I’d like that. Thanks.”

  * * *

  Susan propped her feet up on a chair on the other side of the bistro table in her backyard and sipped lemonade. He loves me. Could she believe his words? What if Josh was wrong and Blake really had thought that by calling off their wedding he had made the ultimate loving sacrifice by not saddling her, as he put it, with someone else’s child? A child who at the time had some pretty significant needs.

  Lord, I don’t know what to do. She couldn’t get the word trust out of her mind. What was God trying to tell her? To trust Him or maybe that she could trust Blake? Her throat thickened with unshed tears of confusion. Why couldn’t she just let go of Blake and move on?

  Her stomach knotted—because she loved him. She’d never stopped loving him, but she couldn’t tell him. Not after the way she’d treated him. Of course he’d tried to make things right, but... Oh, she was such an idiot. She buried her head in her hands.

  * * *

  A few days later, Susan slid her feet into the warm, bubbling water at the salon. Keira sat to her left and Holly to her right. “We really need to do this more often.”

  “I agree, but who has time?” Keira closed her eyes and sank back into the chair. “Mmm, maybe I could make time.”

  Holly giggled. “You are both nuts. You know that?”

  “Of course, but don’t tell anyone.” Susan took her right foot out of the water and rested it on the towel.

  The woman doing her pedicure dried her foot and rubbed her toenails with polish remover.

  “I heard Blake came to see you a few days ago and that you drove off together.” Keira tilted her head toward her with one eye open.

  “How’d you... Never mind. I’m surprised no one told you what we ate for dinner, too.” Honestly, didn’t people have anything better to do with their time than gossip about her? She’d been shocked when Blake had shown up at her office, and it wasn’t like she’d sought him out. The gossips would probably have them eloping by week’s end. Ha, showed what they knew.

  “Ah, come on.” Holly waved her hand. “The gossips aren’t that bad. At least neither of you still live with your parents! Now I can tell you some stories.” She sighed dramatically.

  “Please. Your mom is an angel compared to mine.” Susan pressed her lips together. How had they gotten onto such an unpleasant topic? Her parents were not open for discussion. Somehow Josh managed to maintain a relationship with them, but she was done trying.

  “We set a date.” Keira casually inspected her ring finger.

  “When?” Susan and Holly asked together.

  “October first. My in-laws asked us to hold the ceremony in their yard.”

  “Oh, that will be perfect.” Susan’s mind fast-forwarded to her friend’s special day. “The leaves will be changing color, and the air will have the scent of fall.”

  “Are you still okay with me having a fall wedding, Susan? The memories won’t be too hard?”

  “Of course, I’m fine. Just because my wedding didn’t work out, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be able to enjoy the same season for yours. I’m so happy for you, Keira. You and Pete are the perfect couple.” Okay, so she was a tiny bit jealous, but she’d never let on and ruin her friend’s happiness. No, she’d deal with the disappointment of missing out on her own wedding and celebrate with Keira and Pete.

  “Aww, thanks, sweetie.” Keira reached out for her hand and gave it a squeeze. “Your day will come, don’t give up.”

  Susan cringed at her friend’s comment. She knew Keira was trying to be positive, but the only man she’d ever loved was Blake. She desperately wanted to trust him, but she was so afraid.

  “What’s it like being married?” Holly leaned forward and looked at Keira. “I mean, when you were married to your first husband.”

  “Your parents have a good relationship, right?”

  Holly nodded.

  “Then you already know what it’s like.”

  “I meant...” She waggled her eyebrows. “You know.”

  Keira’s face turned a pretty shade of pink.

  Susan busted up laughing, and the woman painting her toes shot her an impatient look. “Sorry.” She sobered and tried to sit still. “I think that part of marriage you’ll have to discover on your own, Holly.”

  Keira slapped Susan’s arm. “Hush.”

  Holly giggled. “Sorry I aske
d. How is Blake recovering from his injuries, Susan? I heard he had a sprained arm and got pretty beat up.”

  “He moves a little slow, and last I saw him, his arm was still in the sling, but his bruises are fading and the cuts are healing.”

  “Good. I can’t believe he crashed twice in the same week. I imagine he was majorly sore.”

  “Yeah.” Susan made a mental note to stop by his house before going home. She’d grab a pizza and coerce them into sharing dinner with her again. A smile tugged at her lips. Unless Katie had improved overnight, Blake probably needed a break from her constant attention, and his sister from him, even if she didn’t know it. Of course, helping Katie meant she had to spend time with Blake—not such a bad thing—but determination to help the child drove her.

  * * *

  Blake strode to the front door, his muscles finally cooperating. He pulled the door open, and his eyes widened. “Susan.”

  “Hi.” She held up a pizza box. “I come bearing gifts.”

  “It smells delicious.” He stepped aside. “Join us?”

  “I was hoping you’d ask.” She walked in and stopped beside him. “How’s Katie?” She dropped her voice a notch.

  He shook his head with a frown. He’d tried everything the pastor had suggested, but nothing made his sister back off. If she hadn’t been in the bathroom at the moment, she’d be hovering.

  Susan squeezed his arm then breezed into the kitchen. “You still like Canadian bacon and pineapple?”

  “Of course.”

  She pulled plates from the cupboard and then froze. “I just realized you may have already had dinner plans.”

  “Nope.” He took a piece and shoved a hearty bite into his mouth.

  “You’re so gross.” She grabbed a plate, plunked the pizza box on the table and sat. “At least use a napkin and come join me.”

  “Bossy.”

  “I’ve been accused of that a time or two.” A twinkle lit her eyes, and she took a hearty bite.

  Katie walked into the room with slumped shoulders. Her face brightened when she spotted Susan. “Hi.” She strode to the table. “Did you bring the pizza?”