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Page 20
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“This restaurant is fabulous,” Derek squeaked, giving my hand a tight squeeze.
We’d just arrived at the fine dining, French restaurant named, Délicieux, and were being led in by the hostess.
“Right this way, Madam and Mousier,” she said in a very elegant French accent.
Once she had us seated and went through the list of specials for the evening, she left to fetch a nice, vintage bottle of champagne for us.
“Merci,” I responded once the hostess returned with the bottle and filled my glass. I gave her a smile, which quickly dissolved when I saw Ryan over her shoulder, four tables away from us. A rush of heat flooded my body. What is he doing here?
He was alone, with his head down, texting on his phone, but there were clearly two plates of food at the table, and two glasses of half finished wine. He was on a date after he’d told me he was seeing his therapist? I felt the heat rush to my cheeks. He’d lied to me. What did you expect Evangeline! Everyone knows the sort of guy he is.
“Cheers.”
I blinked. Derek was waving his full champagne flute at me, somehow the golden liquid managed to stay inside the glass.
I brought my attention back to him and forced a smile, lifting my flute to meet his.
“Cheers, to cleaning out the mess in my closet and to starting new beginnings,” I added, trying to keep my voice from sounding annoyed.
Derek raised an eyebrow. “You’re spring cleaning? Don’t you dare throw anything out until I’ve been through them,” he ordered, pointing at me with his free hand.
“Relax. I would never do that and I wasn’t talking about my closet.”
“But you just―”
My phone beeped loudly from inside my bag, cutting Derek off.
I shot a look in Ryan’s direction, just as a leggy redhead approached his table and took a seat. Where do I know her?
I watched on as I tried to piece together where I’d seen this woman before.
The redhead, dressed in a short black-laced dress, leaned in for a kiss just has Ryan turned to meet her lips with his. I felt sick to the stomach. I tore my gaze away and searched for my phone. Unbelievable. The message was from him.
I wish I were with you. I wish I had you in my arms and I was inside of you. I hope dinner is going well.
I gritted my teeth.
“Shit. What the hell have I missed in the last two minutes, Evan?” Derek questioned, looking at me rather bizarrely. “You look ready to murder someone.”
“Look over there.” I jerked my chin towards Ryan’s table. Derek’s gaze followed my direction.
“Oh, double shit. I thought he was seeing his therapist?”
Derek slowly turned back to face me, his eyes wide open. When our eyes met I raised an eyebrow, trying hard not to let it show just how upset I was, even though Derek knew me better than that.
I typed a response into my phone.
Are you sure about that? You seem to be with great company. I hope you’re enjoying yours...
I set my phone on the table and picked up my champagne flute, eager to drink its contents down in one go.
I watched as Ryan read his text before his head shot up from his phone, his eyes instantly finding mine. Disregarding Derek’s suggestion to ignore him, I raised my glass to Ryan and gave him a bitter smile, before swallowing the entire contents. I saw him mouth ‘shit’ before jumping up and making his way towards our table. The redhead was left stunned until she spotted me and her eyes narrowed. It was that look that reminded me. That’s where I know her! She was the girl at his baseball games!
Knowing that fact, made me more furious. I didn’t want to speak to Ryan. I didn’t have anything to say. Well that was a lie, I had a lot to say but a fine dining restaurant was no place to start shouting. I reached for my wallet, but Ryan was already standing over me, before I could pull it out.
“Evangeline, listen to me. It’s not what it seems. You need to know that.”
Ignoring him, I pulled out a hundred dollar bill and slammed it on the table. “Evangeline, listen to me damn it!” he continued.
“Derek, I’m so sorry. Thank you for the wonderful gesture of dinner and drinks but I really can’t stay,” I said still ignoring Ryan hovering around me.
“Babe? Fuck. Just... Sit. Talk to me.”
I stood up and turned to Derek. I needed to leave before I accidentally burst into tears and caused a scene. Knowing what I was thinking, Derek nodded and sat there quietly, while Ryan continued to apologize profusely. I needed to get out of there fast. I picked up my belongings and walked away as calmly as I could. I knew Ryan was right behind me, and I had already decided that once I exited the restaurant that I wasn’t going to accept any of his excuses.
When we’d reached the curb outside the restaurant, I raised my arm to hail a cab but a large hand grabbed hold of it and spun me around.
“Just listen will you!”
Conscious that we were in front of a fancy restaurant and we were currently the center of attention in the media, I tried to keep my cool.
“Now is not the time or the place to discuss the situation. Nor do I want your phony apology, not now, not ever―”
“Bullshit,” he growled angrily, causing me to jump. “I don’t give a fuck about the media, Evangeline. Let me explain―”
“No!” I snapped. Before I knew it tears were falling. Damn it, I said I wasn’t going to cry. “I don’t want to hear it, Ryan. I don’t want anything to do with you from now on. I was stupid to think what we had was different, that you treated me differently than your other ‘women’. You’re nothing but an asshole and I want you out of my life.”
I snatched my arm out of his grasp and began to walk away. I could see a few people turning to see what the commotion was all about as they walked by, some even stopped to take photos. Great. It was just what I needed.
Ryan was beside me immediately. “You don’t mean that,” he said in a small voice.
“Which part?” I hissed. “The part where you’re an asshole or when I told you to get out of my life? Because both are true. I mean every word.”
“Evangeline, stop!” In that moment he jumped in front of me and grabbed hold of my shoulders, causing me to come to a halt. I had no choice but to look up at him. “I know I can be an asshole but don’t ask me to leave. Please. I need you, I love you...”
“Well, you should’ve thought about that before you lied to me and showed up here with another woman.”
Just past his shoulder I saw an oncoming cab, I lifted my arm and waved it down. It pulled up in front of me but Ryan was refusing to let me go. “Let go, Ryan. I saw you kiss her. You can’t tell me she’s one of your sisters or that she’s a ‘friend’. I’m not stupid, so don’t you dare treat me like a fool. I’m getting in this cab alone and from now on, I don’t want to hear from you again, you got that?”
He dropped his arms wordlessly. I wiped the fallen tears and jumped in the cab, watching him stand there alone from the back window of the cab as it drove away.
It’s the right thing to do, I reminded myself.
CHAPTER 26
I got home and threw my handbag across the floor out of frustration. I watched my lip-gloss, and perfume and other contents roll out and scatter around the living room floor before I finally dropped to my knees.
A tiny tear escaped and ran down my cheek. Where was all this anger coming from? This wasn’t me. I wasn’t an angry person. Come to think of it, my emotions had been all over the place in the last week. Not only had I been angry, but also I’d cry at the drop of a hat and I was constantly tired… Was I getting sick? Or was it all the emotions I’d locked away for so long finally breaking free? I knew there was only one person to blame: Ryan. None of this would have happened if I’d never fallen in love with him―
A soft knock on the front door interrupted my thoughts. I slowly rose from the floor, thinking that Derek might be checking up on me. For some stupid reason I didn’t bot
her looking through the peep hole and when I opened the door I came face to face with Ryan.
I immediately tried to close the door but he stopped it with his hand and forced it open again. “Please give me a chance to explain myself, Evie.”
“Don’t call me that,” I growled, crossing my arms across my chest.
“May I come in?”
Knowing Ryan wasn’t going to take no for an answer, I let out an exasperated sigh and moved aside to let him in. I followed him silently as he made his way towards the sofa and sat down, patting the spot beside him. I shook my head and instead sat down on the opposite sofa facing him.
We were both silent for a moment. Suddenly feeling shy, my eyes darted around the room looking anywhere but at him. They finally settled on a loose piece of thread on the skirt of my dress. It was only tiny but it provided the perfect distraction as I began to pick at it with my fingers.
“I never lied to you,” Ryan finally said.
“Shouldn’t you be at home resting for tomorrow’s trip?”
“Don’t change the subject, Evangeline, but you’re right, I should be but I’m not leaving. I came over to fix this… fix us.”
I glanced up at him. He was sitting on the edge of the sofa, leaning forward with his elbows resting on his knees and his hands behind his neck, looking up at me from under his lashes. Seeing him this way almost made me forget that we were in the middle of a fight. Damn him for being so gorgeous!
“I was with my therapist. Jessica wanted―”
“Wait! That’s Jessica? That’s the girl you’ve been seeing as your therapist?”
His brows came together in confusion. “Yes, that’s Jessica. She was close by when I called so she suggested meeting up at the restaurant. I didn’t care where we went, I was just happy I finally found courage to ask for help.” A tiny smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. Did he not find it odd that this Jessica girl was dressed appropriately for a fine dine restaurant?
“I saw you kiss her…”
“No you didn’t. What you saw was her trying to kiss me. After seeing the reaction on your face, I knew you didn’t see the part where I pulled away and told her I was spoken for.”
How could I be sure he was telling the truth? As soon as I saw her kiss him, I did look away. Would I be a fool to trust him?
“You have to believe me, Evie. When I saw you across the room and the hurt on your face, it felt like someone had reached inside and ripped my heart out. I knew what it might have looked like and I had to try and explain before you thought I’d gone and messed things up. I never wanted to hurt you, baby. I would never intentionally hurt you; you believe that, right? I’m not that guy anymore.”
He sounded convincing enough but there was still one part that was yet to be explained.
I shifted into a better sitting position before speaking. “Ryan, there’s something else.”
“What is it?” he asked a little too quickly, which took me by surprise.
I cleared my throat. Now, is not the time to be shy, Evangeline!
“Wait, can you please come sit beside me? I’m not going to be seeing you for two weeks. I want to at least touch you.”
With an inward sigh, I stood and made my way over, scolding myself for not having enough strength to say no to him. As soon as I sat down he wrapped an arm around my shoulders and pulled me in close, leaving me no choice but to lean into his hard, chiseled chest. He grabbed a loose wave of hair and began twirling it around his finger.
“Thank you,” he said in a soft whisper.
Being this close made my body ache to touch him. My lips tingled, wishing to kiss those perfectly shaped lips of his. My fingers twitched, begging to caress his strong jawline, to trace every muscle on his body— Concentrate!
“Ryan…” I started, trying to shake the thoughts I had of him out of my head. “The section I sat in for your games―”
“Are only reserved for family and partners. Was that the answer to your question?”
I nodded against him. “Okay, so then why was Jessica there?”
Ryan stilled.
I lifted my face up to his. He was staring at me strangely. “I don’t know? Are you sure it was her?”
“I’m positive. She kept staring at me and every time I looked over she’d give me this hateful glare. Ask your sisters if you don’t believe me.”
“I believe you, baby,” he said kissing the top of my forehead. “But I can’t answer your question because I don’t know why she was there, or how she even found a way to sit in that area unless she’s sleeping with one of the boys.”
Well, if that were the case, why wasn’t she watching the game instead of staring at me the entire time?
“Please don’t let it get to you. There’s nothing for you worry about. You’re the only one I want. You’re the only one I see when I’m out on that field, everyone else disappears.”
“Have you slept with her?” I suddenly blurted out. It had to be the reason why she would be giving me those types of looks.
Ryan stilled again, giving me the answer. I tried to stand but he held me down, gabbing both my wrists.
“Listen, that was before you came into my life. I swear to you that I have not been with anyone else since you, Evangeline.”
I frowned in disgust. “She’s your therapist! You’re telling me instead of trying to fix yourself you went to see her for sex? What’s wrong with you!?”
“I told you I was afraid to speak to anyone about it and yes, that included her!” he retorted. “She wanted it and I wasn’t going to say no.”
“You’re a pig!” I spat, glaring at him.
“Call me what you like, Evangeline, but you have to understand that women throw themselves at me all the time. It comes with being a professional athlete and back then I never gave a shit; I slept with just about any girl I could get my hands on.”
I struggled to free myself. I didn’t want to hear anymore of this but Ryan was refusing to let me go.
“And then you came along, and suddenly I wasn’t interested in just any random girl for the night. The only girl in my thoughts was you. I didn’t know what was happening to me, hell, I’ve never been in a relationship before now, but there I was, acting like one of those lovesick fools willing to risk everything just to have you…”
I stopped struggling and slowly lifted my head to meet his troubled gaze.
“When you found out about my past, you didn’t run away scared, instead, you believed me and encouraged me to face my demons.”
“Why would I run? We have both suffered so much because of our pasts,” I said truthfully.
“That’s the thing, Evangeline. Your strength, your courage… you don’t think you have it but you do, I see it and it’s what I admire most about you. You’ve made it impossible for me not to fall in love with you. How did I have a chance?”
We sat in silence, searching each other’s faces before Ryan spoke again.
“I’m a different person around you, Evangeline. You make me want to become a better man and I’m trying so damn hard to be that for you. I’m going to make mistakes, I’m going to make stupid decisions, but what we have between us is rare, please don’t throw it away so quickly because of a small fuck up.”
Ryan let go of my wrists and wrapped his arms around my shoulders, resting his forehead against the crook of my neck. My arms mechanically reached for him and held him tight as if they were afraid to let him go.
“You mean so much to me, Evangeline. I need you,” he whispered, kissing the sensitive skin on my neck.
We stayed that way for a while before finally heading to bed. I was puzzled when Ryan followed me into the bedroom instead of leaving the apartment, but I never questioned his reasoning. I guess deep down I wanted him there.
****
I woke up the next day alone, with a small note resting on top of the pillow next to me. Don’t give up on me…
I stared at the words written on the piece of paper in Ryan’s handwrit
ing and wondered if it was ever going to be possible to give up on a man like Ryan Fox before drifting off to sleep again. It wasn’t until my phone rang several times that I eventually forced myself out of bed.
I rushed to grab my ringing cell but just missed it. Six missed calls from Derek flashed up on my screen. Just as I was about to call him back a message came through from him asking if I wanted to go to lunch. I knew the real reason was because he was curious to see how the rest of my night turned out, and knowing that it was much easier to get the daunting questions out of the way, I texted back a quick reply instructing him where to meet.
An hour and a half later, I was sitting inside a private booth at a boutique sushi bar filling Derek in on what happened later in the night, then, I listened to him go on about the photographs plastered all over the Internet of the fight Ryan and I had outside the French restaurant. Great.
“It isn’t all that bad,” Derek went on, plopping a piece of sashimi salmon into his mouth using his chopsticks. “You guys are the most talked about couple at the moment. You’re both style icons and apparently one of America’s hottest couples.”
I frowned at him. I didn’t care about any of that. “I don’t want to be talked about at all.”
“I know you don’t but it’s not something you can change. You’re the daughter of one of the richest men on the planet that is also dating one of the sexiest men alive. Mind you, DiCaprio and Gosling aren’t far behind, in my books.” He gave a wink in my direction, to which I just groaned.
Derek chuckled then his face dropped and became serious. “Can I be completely honest with you, Evan?”
Apprehensive of what he was about say next, I slowly nodded.
“You may not realize this but you’ve grown so much since being here. Whether or not your man candy is the reason for that, it makes me happy to see you this way. It’s like you have this newfound strength. You don’t let the paparazzi get to you anymore; the old Evangeline wouldn’t step foot out of the house knowing there was a group of men with cameras sitting outside her door. I haven’t seen you have any panic attacks since your father’s funeral… are you still having the nightmares?”