The Platinum Triangle

by T V Hartwell

  Jake’s eyes moistened as he stared back into the eyes of his male love, feeling both weak in his own resolve to change course and stimulated by Kirby’s touch and his unwavering desire and pursuit of Jake’s heart and body. As Kirby kissed Jake softly on the lips again, and again, and again, he took Jake’s hand and placed it against the stiffness of his erection. “This is for you,” Kirby said. “I’ll make it just for you, if you want me to. I’ll do whatever you want, Jake.”

  Jake slowly stroked Kirby’s hard-on as it formed a silhouette against the silky smooth polyester fabric of his Under Armour shorts. His heart was pounding and his appetite was whet with desire for Kirby’s sex, but he was frozen. Frozen by the battle that was raging inside of him. One part of his brain was telling him to surrender to his bodily desire and the other was telling him to resist and to hold firm to the intentions of his heart.

  “I can’t do this,” Jake said, pulling his hand away from Kirby’s crotch and wiping his eyes. “I’m sorry, Kirby, but I can’t do this anymore. My word is all I have to offer you right now. I love you. I always will. But I love Amanda too and I’m going to marry her. That’s my choice and you’ve got to respect it,” Jake declared.

  Kirby looked at Jake with a blank stare. At a loss for words, he fell silent. What more could he say? Emotionally drained, he turned to open the front door and walked out without knowing where he was headed.

  Chapter 32 Fix You

  Jake had intended to end sexual relations with Kirby a year before when he proposed to Amanda. However, severing those ties proved to be more difficult than he had anticipated. Now, Jake felt momentarily relieved as he sped down Sunset Blvd toward Amanda’s place. Relieved that finally he was able to resist his desire and urge for Kirby. But then relief quickly turned to sadness. After all, Kirby had been the one person he had given himself to longer than anyone else, and Jake felt deeply attached to him. Conflicting emotions of guilt and shame began to emerge inside of him at the same time. Guilt for hurting his best friend and refusing his love and shame for betraying his fiancée’s trust over the course of their entire relationship.

  Jake tried to convince himself that it wasn’t all that bad. Even though he and Kirby lasted for so long, he assumed nobody knew about it, and although he felt an abiding love for Kirby, he was not in love with him. Therefore, it wasn’t a complete betrayal, he tried to rationalize to himself. Although he might have been unfaithful physically, emotionally his heart always belonged to Amanda, he concluded. “Who are you fooling, you fucking dipshit?” Jake screamed at himself. It was still a betrayal and Amanda deserved better and so much more. “You are such a piece of shit,” he screamed again in self-loathing as he tightly gripped the steering wheel of his BMW M3 in a rage. He had been told in ominous fashion by his boss and mentor only three days before that his fiancée was gravely ill and since then, he had been wrapped up in his emotional baggage and history with Kirby. The more he thought about it, the more disgusted and depressed he became.

  Jake started to cry as one of his and Amanda’s favorite songs from their time in college played on the radio, “Fix You,” by Coldplay. As he tried to fathom the condition Amanda was in, he softly sang along to the lyrics of the song that seemed to reflect his feelings and mood so clearly.

  And the tears come streaming down your face

  When you lose something you can't replace

  When you love someone, but it goes to waste

  Could it be worse?

  Lights will guide you home

  And ignite your bones

  And I will try to fix you

  When Jake arrived and walked into Amanda’s condo, she hopped up from the sofa where she had been resting to greet him with a hug as if he were a hero returning home from battle. Her sincerity and nurturing manner made Jake feel whole and wholly undeserving of such loving devotion. He kissed her forehead and held her in his arms as the soft, supple touch of her skin and the familiar lavender scent of her body cream filled him with warmth and peace inside. In her embrace is where he felt at home. Where his spirit felt lifted and his weariness fixed. He couldn’t imagine things being any other way.

  As they settled into each other’s company, Jake joined Amanda on the sofa to swap stories about their activities over the last few days since they had last seen one another. Jake lovingly massaged Amanda’s ankles and feet as she described her trip to New York before the conversation eventually turned to his weekend in Vegas. They had spoken by phone and texted each other several times over the weekend, so Amanda already knew a few things, but she was curious to know more.

  “So tell me about this stripper,” Amanda said, grinning.

  Jake looked at her apprehensively, not wanting to go into any detail.

  “I know…I know, we agreed not to scrutinize each other about our bachelor and bachelorette parties,” Amanda said, lifting her hands and showing her palms in a surrendering motion. “But this stripper you told me about, did you say she was a dominatrix? I actually think that’s kind of cool they thought of that versus having some skanky girls dancing around giving lap dances to everyone.”

  “Yeah, her name was Satana,” Jake said, chuckling and feeling more at ease by Amanda’s casual attitude and curiosity about the adult entertainment provided at his bachelor party.

  “Satana? You mean like Satan?”

  “Yep. Satana, Queen of Darkness or of the Dark. Something like that.”

  “Oh my God, that sounds kind of freakish. What was she wearing? What did she look like?” Amanda asked inquisitively, folding her arms.

  “Amandaaa,” Jake said plaintively in a soft tone, not wanting to go there.

  “Okay, okay. I know. Sorry. But how weird to name yourself after the devil.”

  “She actually bases her name off of a comic book character. But you don’t believe in a devil, do you?”

  “I don’t know. When I was a kid I certainly did, being raised Catholic. I guess I believe there are good spirits; like my grandpa would be one of the good spirits looking over us and protecting us. I actually talk to him occasionally.”

  “Really?”

  “Yeah, I do. He doesn’t talk back, but I believe he hears me.” There was like a solemn, reverential pause between them for a moment as Jake knew how close Amanda was to her grandfather before he passed. “Anyway,” she continued, “I also think there are bad spirits too, and the devil is like the leader of the bad spirits.”

  Jake giggled at her explanation. “I love you.”

  “What? What’s so funny? How rude.” Amanda pouted, feeling insecure.

  “Nothing, nothing. I like that you’ve given some thought to it and have your own idea about it. Being raised Episcopalian, we never talked about the devil. Evil was basically presented as man rebelling against the natural order of things of his own free will. Although the rector at our parish is pretty liberal and very intellectual, actually. He kind of has his own view on things it seems. Perhaps there is some official church teaching about the devil, but I don’t know about it if there is.”

  “Father Gregorio is pretty liberal too, especially considering that he’s marrying us without you being Catholic.”

  “I thought he agreed to do it because I said it was okay for our kids to be raised Catholic.”

  “Well, you said that when we met with him, but he was already on board with doing our wedding way before that. He never said that he wouldn’t marry us if we didn’t raise our kids Catholic. My family has known him for years. Plus he baptized me and Alex, and he gave my grandfather’s eulogy. There is no way he wouldn’t conduct my wedding.”

  “Hey! Totally random question, but what’s your blood type?” Jake asked.

  Amanda thought for a second before answering, not expecting the question. “I don’t know. Should I know that?” she asked, laughing at herself.

  “Not necessarily. If you’ve never had a reason to know it, like for medical purposes, then I guess you wouldn’t know it. For example, you’ve never had a bl
ood transfusion or any kind of major surgery where you would’ve needed one, have you?”

  “No. Never. Have you?”

  “No, I haven’t. But I’ve donated blood many times, so I know that I have blood type O.”

  “So what does it mean that you have blood type O? I feel so stupid, I should probably know this.”

  “It means that I’m a hot commodity, which is why I’ve donated to a lot of blood drives over the years.”

  “What do you mean? Why are you a hot commodity?”

  “Well, there are four major blood groups. Group A, Group B, Group AB, and O. So if you’re in Group A, you can donate blood to other A’s and to those who have a mix of both A and B, the AB’s. And likewise, if you’re in group B, you can donate blood to other B’s and to the AB’s since they have a mix of both blood types. However, if you’re in Group AB then you can only donate to other AB’s. My group, the fourth group, Group O, is considered the universal donor group. We can donate blood to anyone in any of the four groups.”

  “How interesting. I hope I’m in Group O too. I definitely don’t want to be an AB. Sounds too limiting.”

  “I think most people are O’s, but there are exceptions. But you know, as long as we’ve been together, I don’t think we ever talked about our medical histories. I was thinking, God forbid, if anything ever happened to you or me or to one of our kids, you know, like a serious injury or illness, we might have to donate blood to each other. So it would be good to know our blood types and our family medical histories and such.”

  “Hmm. That’s true. Well, if this flu or whatever I have doesn’t go away, I’m going to see my doctor and I’ll ask him about my blood type. But I don’t know that much about my family’s medical history. As you know, my grandfather died of colon cancer, but beyond that everyone else seems to be pretty healthy.”

  “And you’ve been as healthy as a horse for as long as I’ve known you,” Jake said, seeking the affirmative response.

  “Other than having my tonsils removed when I was a kid, I haven’t had surgery for anything else.”

  “I think you told me about your tonsils a while back. When we were still in college, maybe. But beyond that, you’ve never had any major medical issues, right?”

  “Well, none that required surgery,” Amanda said as she became slightly uncomfortable with the topic. She adjusted herself on the sofa, pulling her feet from Jake’s lap and folding her arms.

  “Sooo, does that mean you did have something major?” Jake asked cautiously.

  Amanda stared down at nothing in particular, appearing hesitant before she answered. “There’s something that I don’t think I’ve ever told you before.”

  “What is it?”

  “When I was at Cate School, I had a bout with anorexia during my junior year and I was sent to a treatment center for two months. It was a difficult time,” Amanda said as tears began to well and fall from her brown eyes. “Being in such a small bubble like that, I guess, had a bad effect on me. I thought I was in love with this stupid tennis player who was a year ahead of me…”

  “Was it that tennis player you dated at Stanford before me?”

  “Yes. You remember him?”

  “I do.”

  “Well, anyway. I lost my virginity to him, but afterward he started sleeping with other girls too and things pretty much went downhill from there for me. I felt like I needed to fix myself and that I wasn’t good enough for him. And stupid me, after all of that, I basically followed him to Stanford.”

  Jake moved over to sit right next to Amanda to hold and console her as she wiped her tears away.

  “You know, I think that’s the first time I’ve ever admitted to anyone that I followed that stupid jerk to Stanford. I guess I was pretty masochistic back then.”

  “His loss was my very big gain because you fell right into my hands after you broke up with him and my life has been the better for it ever since.” Jake gently pulled Amanda’s chin so that they were looking at each other. “Being with you has made me happier than I could have ever imagined or planned. Thank you for sticking with me for the last six years and not giving up on us. I don’t know what I would do without you, babe. You mean so much more to me than you will ever know,” Jake said as he rubbed the tip of his nose to Amanda’s.

  “Jake, stop. You’re going to make me cry again,” she said as her eyes welled with more tears. “Look at me, I’m making such a mess,” she said as she tried to control the flow with hands that were already wet.

  Jake got up to grab some tissues for her and then returned to her side, wrapping her in his arms as she leaned in against him.

  He kissed her on the right temple as he cuddled her. “You know you rescued me,” he said contemplatively.

  “What do you mean?” Amanda said as she wiped her face.

  “You rescued me from myself and you still do every day. You help me to focus and to remember that life is about more than self-indulgence and self-gratification, and how important it is to make choices that have meaning and purpose behind them. I used to do things that fed my ego or did things because it felt good or because it made somebody else feel good without thinking about the consequences or ignoring the consequences altogether. Sometimes I still make that same mistake, unfortunately. But you taught me to ask myself why about the choices I make. When I was an idiot and we broke up, I kept asking myself afterward, why? That’s the question you asked me, remember? And when I could never come up with a sensible explanation, I knew that I had made a huge mistake. Sitting here with you right now and knowing that our wedding is just days away, feels like a dream come true, and now that I’ve got you back, I will never let you go again. I swear to God.”

  Chapter 33 It Never Gets Old

  Amanda and Jake spent the rest of the evening on the sofa, cuddling, talking, eating food that they ordered in for dinner, and watching TV. Simply enjoying being together again in each other’s company after having not seen each other since the morning Amanda left for New York.

  Later, Amanda got up to shower and Jake walked into the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash his face before bed. He hadn’t touched his girl for a few days and seeing the water cascading over the hills of her breasts and down her back and over the subtle curves of her slender, but toned hips filled him with desire to wrap her flesh around his.

  As Amanda rinsed her hair and allowed the spray of the shower head to splash her face to clean the suds from her eyes, Jake stepped in behind her and gently placed his hands on her waist. Amanda let out a small squeak at the touch of his hands. “It’s just me, baby. I’ve got you,” he said as he closed in, pressing himself against her back and wrapping his arms around her fully as he gently pressed and rubbed her abdomen with his hands.

  “Sweetie, you’re going to get sick. I don’t want you to catch what I have.”

  “Don’t worry, I won’t. I’ve managed to avoid kissing you on the mouth so far, but it’s been a hard thing to do. You’re so irresistible,” he said, kissing the back of her head and then pressing his face to it to smell the freshness of her shampooed hair.

  “I couldn’t have gotten sick at a worse time. This is so horrible, Jake. I’m worried that I’ll end up puking all over myself at the altar on our wedding day. It will be so embarrassing.”

  “No, you won’t. You’ll be okay. You should go to the doctor and get some antibiotics or something if you don’t feel better by tomorrow morning,” he said as he gently pushed her head forward to kiss and nibble on the back of her left ear.

  “I love you so much,” he said as he continued to kiss the back of her ear and neck. He began to sway from side to side to increase the friction and sensation of his rising erection against the soft, but taut feel of her buttocks. Amanda followed his lead and swayed with him, pressing herself into his pelvis to aid in his arousal and pleasure.

  Jake moved his hands up and down her abdomen and then all the way down beyond her pelvis until his hands reached the opening of her sex, slippery an
d wet from liquid body soap and water. Amanda gasped at the feel of her man’s strong hands as he fondled and caressed her lovingly, using his fingers masterfully to penetrate her opening and to massage her clit. Amanda’s reaction stirred him more as she pleaded and cried breathlessly, “Fuck me, Jake. I need to feel you inside me. I missed you. I couldn’t stop thinking about you. Please…fuck me.”

  “I missed you too, baby,” Jake said as he pumped his fully erect sex against her buttocks harder and faster. He moved his hands up to cup and squeeze both her breasts as he began to tongue the inside of her left ear, sending Amanda into a shiver of happy delight. She grabbed on to his hands with hers to temper the pressure to her breasts as his hold on them became more intense the more excited and sex charged he became.

  Amanda turned her head to the side to rest her right cheek on the wall as Jake pressed her up against it before inserting his sex inside of hers. Pushing in and pulling all the way out, in and out, in and out with a slow, steady motion before fucking her faster and harder. Amanda moaned and pleaded with Jake not to stop. He walked her hands down the shower wall as her feet moved back, bending her over so he could penetrate her more deeply. Aroused beyond all restraint by her soaking wet sex, he continued to pound her from behind, his skin slapping loudly against hers as she thrust back against him.

  Amanda cried out, “Oh yes, oh yes, Jake, Jake…please, Jake, oh please, oh please…don’t stop.” Her cries and pleas excited Jake more; so much so that he nearly caused her to fall over by the force of his thrust before gripping her waist more tightly to hold her up. As he approached climax, he pressed his cock deep into her ocean of warm, soft flesh to mark her yet again with the love springing from the depth of his loins.

  “Aaaaaah…oh fuck, baby,” Jake cried out as he cocked his head back and his body trembled upon release. The feeling never grew old.