by Bethan Lewis
‘Here, sit down. Deep breaths. In and out, that’s it,’ Megan instructed. ‘Everything is going to be okay. We will get through this.’
‘I hope so. Being made redundant is not something that has happened to me before.’
‘No me neither. I am not sure what to do now.’ Megan’s perfectly made up face screwed up as she frowned.
‘I think we need some time to process what has transpired, and put things into perspective.’
The frown disappeared and Meg grinned, ‘I agree, and where better to deal with things than the pub. Here’s a bag for your stuff. Once you have sorted your desk, we are going to the Copper Rose. I think a stiff drink is in order.’
‘Sounds like an excellent idea, I could do with a glass of something strong. Thanks, Meg,’ Erin said. ‘At least going through this together, we can help each other.’
Chapter 4
The Copper Rose was busting at the seams. Erin scanned the room and spotted a lot of familiar faces; Stan from the computer department, Julia and Anne from accounts, Betty from marketing. It was as if the whole of Watson Dean had descended for a reunion; except it was more of a commiseration party.
Leaving Erin to trail behind her, Megan headed straight to the bar and ordered a round of cocktails and two glasses of wine; in her opinion Erin thought it a little early in the day to start drinking, but what the Hell, it had been one of those days.
‘Cheers,’ Megan said as she lifted the tiny shot glass to her mouth. ‘Down in one!’
Erin mimicked her friend’s actions and spluttered as the fiery mixture burned a path down her throat. ‘Oh, I needed that.’
Meg laughed and slammed her glass back down on the bar. ‘Let’s go find somewhere to sit.’
They found an empty table in the corner of the room and sat down, sipping at their wine. Someone started up the jukebox and a popular rock song blasted out of the speakers above their heads.
‘Well this has been a crap day,’ Megan shouted.
‘It has a bit,’ Erin said, nodding her head. ‘What are you going to do now?’
‘Sorry? I can’t hear you.’
‘What are you going to do now?’ Erin shouted back.
The noise was unbearable, there was no way they were going to be able to conduct a decent conversation.
The song changed and “I will survive” blared out. The two women grinned at each other, how appropriate. The ex-employees of Watson Dean started singing along and Erin and Megan joined in, singing at the top of their lungs. As the song finished, a cheer went up and everyone started clinking their glasses.
‘Shall we go somewhere quieter?’ Erin suggested, as there was a lull in the music.
‘Yes, come on let’s get out of here.’
The women gulped down the last of their drinks and left the bar. An icy blast blew around them and Erin pulled her coat tighter around herself. They linked arms and hurried down the street before stopping in front of the local job centre. Raising her eyebrows Megan suggested they go inside. They exited the building ten minutes later, disheartened to discover there were no suitable jobs in the near vicinity. Erin sighed, finding a new job would not be an easy task.
‘What a waste of time,’ Megan said.
‘I agree. There is nothing out there, and the market is now teeming with unemployed Watson Dean employees who are all going to be vying for the same jobs,’ Erin said.
‘It’s not so bad for me, at least I still have Peter’s wage coming in,’ Megan said, referring to her husband. ‘Even then things will be tight. How are you going to manage?’
‘My mortgage is paid off, so I don’t need to worry about that. I have enough savings stashed away to tide me over for a few months,’ Erin said, grateful that she had been so thrifty over the years.
They turned on to the pedestrianised path which ran parallel to the canal, and continued walking in comfortable silence. Erin loved this part of the town, it was old and steeped in history. Thick stone walls separated them from the water, and at the side of the path were little gift shops and cafés. Being the middle of the day, the area was heavily congested with people; tourists picking up gifts for loved ones back home, couples sitting at the tables outside the cafes enjoying quality time together and the elderly taking pleasure from the scenery.
‘Do you fancy a cuppa?’ Erin asked.
‘I would love one.’
They entered one of the stone-clad teashops, settled themselves at a table overlooking the water and ordered two mugs of hot chocolate and a bowl of soup to warm up. Whilst they waited for their order, Erin gazed out of the window watching a multi-coloured barge meander its way up the canal. She had never been on one before and wondered what it was like inside. Was it tiny and cramped, or spacious and luxurious? Now she had some time on her hands she could find out, or she could do something else she had never done before, but what?
‘Earth to Erin.’ Megan’s voice penetrated her thoughts, and she looked up to find her friend grinning at her. ‘You were miles away then.’
‘Sorry.’ Erin said laughing. ‘I was thinking about all the extra time I now have on my hands. No boyfriend, no job, the kids have left home and have their own lives. I am toying with the idea of going away for a bit, explore some of the world.’
‘What? Travel by yourself? I don’t think it’s such a safe idea. Why don’t you join a holiday for over thirties? It would be safer travelling with an organised group.’
‘Yes maybe. It is just something that popped into my head. I won’t do anything hasty, I will think on it some more…’ Erin was interrupted by the waitress bringing their food and drinks.
‘So what happened the other night with Tim?’ Megan asked, as she heaped a spoonful of sugar into her mug.
Erin inwardly groaned as she took a mouthful of soup. Given the day’s drama regarding work, she had hoped Megan had forgotten all about Tim.
‘I told him our relationship was over; in a kind gentle way. He was shocked at first, as expected. Then he proposed marriage, I turned him down, he got angry, packed his bag and left.’
‘He proposed?’ Megan said incredulously. ‘What an odd thing to do.’
‘It was my fault. I was listing my reasons for ending it, and I blurted out that I wanted to be married someday. He then asked, if I married him would we stay together. I told him I wanted to be married in the future, but not to him, then he lost his temper.’
‘Wow, kick a guy when he’s down. Don’t blame him for being peeved.’
‘Hey! Don’t have too much sympathy for the guy. After he left, I came across his laptop and I couldn’t resist taking a peek. Turns out he is a pervert, and he was cheating on me. So I am better off without him anyway.’
‘He was cheating? What a bastard,’ Megan said, shock etched on her beautiful face. ‘I suspected he was up to something when I bumped into him at…’
‘Go on. Where did you see him?’
‘At The Lodge.’
‘When was this?’
‘Remember work sent me to a conference a few weeks ago?’ Erin nodded. ‘I was leaving when he arrived. He stopped to chat, said an old friend was in town, and he was meeting him for a drink. I didn’t think much of it at the time, he wasn’t nervous or jumpy so I didn’t suspect anything. Sorry, I should have told you.’
‘That’s okay, it appears he was adept at telling lies. He duped us all.’
‘Who is the other woman?’
‘No-one we know. Someone called Alice, he connected with her online, on some dating site called Matchmakers Heaven. She’s five years older than me, curvy, with long blonde hair and glasses. Not the type of woman I thought he would go for.’
Megan patted the back of Erin’s hand, ‘You are probably twice the woman she is. Men are such idiots at times. They always think the grass is greener on the other side, but by the time they realise it’s not, we have wised up and it is too late.’
‘Doesn’t matter now, the relationship is over. I just can’t believe how naïve
and stupid I was. I didn’t realise how restrictive and one sided the relationship was. I fell under his spell, and he played me like a fiddle. He had me eating out of the palm of his hand, and I would have done anything for him, he clicked his fingers and I came running. Now I can see him for what he really is; a liar and a cheat. So, I have made a pact with myself; no man is going to treat me like that again. It’s time to put my own happiness first. I am going to do what I want, and not be answerable to anyone.’
‘Good for you. You have spent so long putting everyone’s needs before your own, it is time you treated yourself as priority number one. A vacation might not be such a bad idea. It will do you the world of good.’ Megan said, reaching into her bag as her mobile phone started to ring. ‘It’s Peter. Hey babe, how’s your day going? ...okay… at a café by the riverside with Erin… okay meet you at the reception… see you soon. Bye.’
‘Do you have to go?’ Erin asked, as she hung up the phone.
‘Yes I’m afraid so. Sorry. I will call tomorrow, and we will finish our chat then.’ She left some change on the table, reached over and hugged Erin. ‘Bye.’
‘Bye, speak to you this evening.’
Megan rushed out of the café and Erin continued to sip her hot chocolate, savouring the moment as the milky liquid flowed down her throat. With no job, and nowhere urgent she needed to be, she pulled a notebook and pen out of her handbag and started listing all the things she wanted to do and places she wanted to visit.
MY BUCKET LIST
Things to do:
Travel the world
Go on a hot air balloon ride
Go on a canal boat (inspired by current location)
Go on an air boat ride
Get a tattoo
Swim with dolphins
Take a moonlit stroll on the beach
Ride a horse
Watch the sun rise on a beach
Write and publish a book
Get married
Make a ton of money
Go skinny dipping
Walk the red carpet
Take a dance class
Try caviar and oysters
Visit a vineyard and go wine tasting
Spend the day in a chocolate factory as a taster
Sleep in a haunted house and go ghost hunting
Do a charity walk
Reading it back Erin grinned to herself, nothing on the list was too outrageous or dangerous, most people would say it was quite boring, but she was forty now, she was too old to go throwing herself off bridges and trying out extreme sports. The items on her bucket list were all perfectly achievable. Well most of them, the ‘getting married’ would take some time to sort out.
‘Do you want anything else?’ the waitress asked, interrupting Erin’s train of thought.
‘No thank you. Can I have the bill when you’re ready?’
Erin waited until the waitress cleared the table and left, and then carried on writing.
Countries I want to visit:
America; Florida and Disney world
France; specifically Paris and the Eiffel Tower
Italy; Rome and Venice (take a trip in a gondola)
Belgium; (for the chocolate)
Africa; safari
Channel Islands
Wales
Iceland; the northern lights
Erin sat and studied the list, there were plenty of ideas to keep her going for the next few years, but the important question was, where did she start? Closing her eyes she moved the pen over the paper and stabbed it. She opened her eyes and looked down at where the pen had landed; number 5, get a tattoo! Unable to stop herself she laughed out loud. Putting the notebook back in her bag she got up to leave. No way was she starting with that, maybe she should go from the top of the list and work her way down.
As Erin sauntered down the street, she browsed in the shop windows, enjoying her afternoon of unexpected freedom. She neared the High Street, and dull grey office blocks replaced the colourful gift shops. Coming to a halt outside a travel agents, Erin hesitated for a second, then flung open the door. The instant she stepped over the threshold, she was accosted by one of the female sales agents eager to sell her a holiday, and earn their commission.
‘Good afternoon. How are you today?’ the agent greeted her.
‘Hello. I am fine thanks.’ Erin replied.
‘Can I help you with something? Where are you planning on going? Business or pleasure?’ the over-enthusiastic woman said with a smile.
‘Oh, I don’t know. I haven’t decided yet. I was just going to pick up some brochures to browse through.’
Erin walked over to the shelf filled with booklets and leaflets of every destination imaginable. The sales rep’s face fell slightly, but then brightened as she changed tactics.
‘Perhaps I can help you decide. The Caribbean is a popular destination this time of year. How about St Lucia?’ she recommended, picking up a brochure with a picture of a tropical beach on the cover.
Erin laughed. ‘That is a tad out of my budget I am afraid. I was thinking of somewhere closer to home.’ Spying a pile of brochures on France and the Channel Islands Erin grabbed them, eager to escape the woman’s clutches. ‘I will take these. Thanks for your help.’
Stuffing the brochures in her bag, Erin raced out of the door. Nothing irritated her more than pushy sales staff, she preferred to browse unaided and at her leisure; if she needed help she would ask.
On the way towards the bus station Erin couldn’t stop thinking about holidays. She clambered aboard the waiting bus, sank down on a seat and pulled out the magazines. With idyllic blue sea and yellow sands, some of the places resembled heaven. She could picture herself lazing around on a sun-lounger with a cocktail in her hand. Yes, this was something she was definitely going to do.
Erin stared out of the window and started in confusion, instead of grubby grey buildings she was looking at rows of tall green trees swaying in the wind. She had been so engrossed in the travel brochure she had missed her stop. Erin reached out and pushed the bell signalling the bus to halt. The bus pulled up at the next stop, and she got off and hurried back up the road towards her home.
Fifteen minutes later she entered the flat, placed her bag and the magazines on the table, kicked off her heels, unbuttoned her coat, and threw it haphazardly down on the couch. Going over to her desk she turned on the computer, and spent the rest of the evening googling holiday destinations.
In the back of her mind a voice was telling her she should be searching for a new job, but, ‘What the hell.’ She said aloud. ‘I am only going to live once, and it’s time to start enjoying my life a little.’
By the end of the night her accommodation and flights were booked. In five days’ time she was off to the beautiful island of Jersey.
Chapter 5
Erin stretched lazily, then turned over and snuggled deeper into the bed. She couldn’t remember the last time she had had a lie-in. With no job to go to, she lay enjoying the peace and quiet; no kids, boyfriend or television blaring from the other room.
Half an hour later, she resigned herself to the fact that she was wide awake. She swung her legs over the side of the bed, pulled on her purple dressing gown and fluffy slippers and padded out of the bedroom towards the kitchen. She needed coffee.
As she waited for the kettle to boil, she stared out of the window at the empty street below. Children were in school, and her neighbours in work. The whole estate was like a ghost town. Since moving in six years ago she had never spent much time in her flat in the middle of the day, and she was surprised at how different the neighbourhood felt.
She carried her coffee and toast into the lounge and curled up on the sofa and flicked the television on. A green flashing light on her mobile phone, caught her eye, and she picked up the device and clicked on the envelope icon. A text flashed up on the screen.
“Hey Erin, found somewhere to stay will be around for my things today. Will wait until you are in work. Less awkward t
his way. Pop key through letterbox when I leave. Tim”
Erin grinned, he obviously hadn’t heard about the redundancies at Watson Dean. He was in for a shock when he turned up and found her sitting there, with his laptop open showing the evidence of his betrayal.
She glugged down the last of her coffee and rushed to change out of her bed clothes. Sitting at the dressing table, she brushed her dark, grey-streaked hair until it lay in shiny waves which cascaded half-way down her back. Then she applied her make-up, before pulling on a short skirt and a low cut t-shirt which skimmed the tops of her breasts. Twirling in front of the floor length mirror she scrutinised her appearance. She wasn’t sure why she was making such an effort for his visit, but she knew it was important. It wasn’t as if she wanted him back and was trying to seduce him, it was more that she needed to show him what he had lost. That she could cope well enough on her own, without him.
She was just finishing setting up Tim’s laptop when the scraping of a key in the lock alerted her to his arrival. Settling herself in the easy chair facing the door, she picked up a book and started flicking through the pages, pretending to read.
The door swung open, and Tim walked in, his face registering shock at seeing her there.
‘Erin. What are you doing here?’ Tim said.
‘Hi. I live here.’ Erin answered.
‘I thought you would be in work.’
‘No, not today. Unexpectedly got the day off.’
‘How come? Is something wrong?’ Tim asked.
‘I was made redundant on Monday. Watson Dean made a bad deal, and loads of us lost our jobs.’
‘Oh my god. How are you coping? Is there anything I can do?’