Snodgrass, Catherine

by Another Chance AnotherTime (lit)

  As he had done with Dani, as had been done to him, Ira went through the routine of preparation. Alec's patience was running short. If he didn't hurry, the opportunity would be lost- most probably forever. He had a duty as a psychiatrist to help his patient. But Ira also knew he had a larger duty to fulfill and a chance to right a wrong made centuries before.

  "All right, Alec. Let's start. We'll go back to last Friday."

  He fought the process. Ira knew that. His answers were by rote, a chronological day timer. Ira let him have his way.

  "Very good. Now it's evening. There's a bad accident. It's upsetting. You'll have to relax even more to get through this. So...relax...relax."

  Alec sagged a bit. Finally, the response Ira was hoping for. He was under. "Tell me what happened."

  "There's an accident. Horrible. One man dead...the driver. There's a woman. She's...good, she's alive...but..." A frowned inched his eyebrows together. "She thinks she knows me. 'I have missed you so.' That's what she says." He fingers clenched.

  "You're doing fine. Just continue to relax." Ira leaned forward. "Do you know this woman? Relax and think back."

  Alec was silent for so long, Ira was afraid the moment was gone, that his patient had shut him out. Then Alec sucked in a deep breath.

  "It's her!" The words came out on a gasp. "After all this time. It is her! I must save her. This time I will not fail her."

  "You failed her before?"

  He gave a strangled laugh. "I have failed her every time."

  "Tell me about those times. Tell me about the time before this that you failed her, Alec."

  Silence, again. Then...

  "I am not Alec. I am Derek," he said in a British accent. "Miriam thinks I am cheap. Wait until she sees this ring. She'll say I won it in a poker game." He laughed. "I have scrimped and saved all my pay for this beauty. Even now she's waiting for me at the train depot." He laughed again. "She is going to be furious when she learns I'm not there. She'll come to our flat...I should meet her at the station. No sense getting her too angry. But first, I shall have to hide this. I swear that bloody landlady of ours is a thief." Alec snapped his fingers. "Our chair. Perfect. By tomorrow this time, Miriam will be my wife." His face screwed up as if in pain.

  "What's happened?"

  "The Germans are back. Oh my God, they're bombing the depot!"

  Derek saw Miriam silhouetted against the blast. He screamed a warning but it was too late. The building collapsed, raining debris upon her. This was his fault.

  "I have her. She's hurt badly," Alec said in monotone. "Still, she smiles up at me. 'I have missed you so.' Those are her words. She takes my hand. 'We are having a child.'" A tear slipped down Alec's cheek.

  "Ah, love...we'll go far from here. To America where it is safe...She's dead. The ring. She never knew...The planes are making another run. At least we can die together."

  Ira watched Alec wince and duck. In his mind he was Derek futilely trying to avoid the collapsing building. As with Dani, it hurt Ira to hear it, and he knew there was so much more. He briefly considered ending the session, then asked himself who he was sparing, himself or Alec?

  "It was an accident." Ira cleared his throat. "You didn't fail her."

  "She died because I wasn't there. If I had been on the train, we would have left before the bombing. I can't believe I let this happen. Never again."

  "Tell me about the other times."

  "It hurts too much. It shames me too much."

  Ira reached forward to grasp Alec's hand, breaking his own rules. "It will be fine. You will be able to tell me. The pain and shame will not exist. Tell me about the other times."

  Alec sighed and nodded. "I was a doctor. I had responsibilities. I could not be expected to attend a child birthing when another was in danger of losing his leg. I left Greta with the woman. She begged me to stay. I refused. She helped with the birth. The child was born, and then died minutes later. Greta was accused of being a witch. They yanked her from my arms, then drowned her. I begged for her life. They took mine as well. Just as they had done before."

  "Before?"

  "I did not listen to Octavia. I asked for her hand in marriage. I compromised her position. I escaped the city and promised to return to get her. They stoned her, called her a whore in the center of the arena. I rushed to her side, but was too late. With her last breath, she warned me of the lion's attack."

  "Anything more?"

  "I tire of speaking of this. No more. I want this done."

  Ira leaned back. So much tragedy for two souls. Yet here they were on the path to being a couple. There was nothing to stand in their way. His task was too simple. All he had to do was help Alec understand there was nothing wrong with what he had been seeing.

  "Very well. Enough is enough. You will awaken on the count of three and you will remember everything. One...two...three."

  Alec slowly opened his eyes and focused on Ira.

  Ira smiled. "Who am I?"

  "Ira Roberts."

  "Fine...who was I?"

  Still groggy, Alec replied, "My mother, Cassia." He blinked, not quite believing what had just come from his lips.

  "And do you remember?"

  The fog in his head drifted away. Alec stared at the man in front of him and saw beyond the physical. It was both frightening and yet intriguing.

  "Yes...I remember. I'm not sure I believe it, but I remember."

  "Maybe these will help." Ira slid two cassettes across the table toward him. "I'm sure you will want to listen to yours as well."

  Alec spared the tapes a glance. "Do I want to know whose sessions those are?"

  "You'll find out soon enough." He hit the rewind button on the tape player. "I know this is difficult. I won't try to convince you either way. Just listen to the tapes, search your soul, and decide for yourself. You can take them with you, or listen right here. I'll be glad to give you some privacy."

  Ira didn't wait for Alec to decide. He popped the third tape from the recorder, laid it beside the others, and left.

  Using his index finger, Alec lined up the tapes. Labels identified each: Danielle Morgan, Ira Roberts, Alec Edwards. The images in his head persisted; not images, memories. He was more confused than ever.

  "Oh, well...here goes."

  Alec slid his tape into the recorder.

  * * *

  Two hours later, Alec was still confused. At least the panic was gone-the session with Ira had certainly helped that way. As for the rest...it sounded like the biggest bunch of bull he had ever heard in his life despite the evidence on the three tapes.

  Lining up the tapes in their original order, Alec rested his forearms on his knees while he judged their validity. There was a logical explanation for everything.

  Dani's experiences were a combination of the accident, the attempt on her life, her fear of death, and the attraction between her and Alec. Ira's were as result of wanting to believe in reincarnation and having the chance to use Dani's session as a springboard. As for himself, it was stress, his need to be a good doctor, and his fear of obsession.

  Even as he tried to categorize it all, Alec shook his head. He couldn't speak for Dani or Ira, but he was his own proof. He knew the diamond ring was deep in the chair. He had caught glimpses of the lives he had supposedly lived long before Ira regressed him-Marcus and Octavia, Greta drowning while Carl watched helplessly.

  "Now that could have been brought on by the sculpture," he said to himself. "Or was the sculpture a carry-over from that?" That made more sense. How else could he have sat before a mound of clay on his first attempt and sculpt a perfect bust?

  "I'm a plastic surgeon, damn it. That's how." But there was a big difference between a person's face and a lump of clay. And while it was true that he had always had a tremendous knack for reconstructive surgery, Alec couldn't see how that skill could help the other. Unless it was the purported past life sculpting that helped him with...

  Alec shoved himself out of the chair and paced the wi
dth of the room. He was thinking himself in circles, driving himself nuts trying to piece together this puzzle. It made no sense, and yet it did.

  His mind wandered back to that big orange chair. The chair where Miriam and Derek had planned their future. The chair where he and Dani had made love for the first time. The chair that magically reappeared in their lives because Dani had subconsciously recognized it in a second-hand store. And the baby-the one both he and Dani subconsciously knew was gone.

  Then there was this business with Ira. Alec was the one who said Ira was Cassia, his mother from Kourion. He had rewound the tapes dozens of times to see if the clue had been fed to him. Nothing. Dani never mentioned Cassia, and Alec didn't hear Ira's tape identifying him as Cassia until after Alec named him.

  He didn't like this in the least. Supposing this was true, was he now going to start recognizing others for what they used to be? Talk about unnerving. How could a person function when he was always looking over his shoulder for people who didn't matter any more? That would be obsession for sure.

  The door opened behind him. Alec turned slowly, hands clasped behind his back.

  Ira stood in the doorway. He waited for Alec to say something. Trouble was Alec didn't know how to respond. It was all very interesting, he supposed, if it were true. And it would certainly help to explain his instant, immediate attraction to Dani. Other than that, it meant nothing. It was in the past and didn't really matter. Here...now...that's what was important.

  "Well?"

  Alec knew Ira couldn't stand the silence much longer. Any amusement he might have felt over his impatience was fleeting. "What did Dani have to say about all this?"

  "She doesn't know," Ira said. "Doesn't want to know. She ran out of here seconds after she came out of hypnosis. But what about you? How do you feel about this?"

  How did he feel? How could he feel? "I find it..." Alec searched for the right word. "Intriguing, but irrelevant. Although I will admit that having the knowledge of it has eliminated the panic I felt before."

  "Irrelevant?" Ira rushed forward, stopping to within a foot of Alec. "How can you say that? These are events which have shaped the person you are."

  "Wrong. My parents, my family has shaped the person I am. They are who have given me morals, values-"

  "Given or guided you along that path and provided you the opportunity and circumstances to fulfill your destiny?"

  "And what destiny would that be, Ira?" He pointed to the table where the cassettes were neatly aligned. "According to those, in each of my...of our past lives, the woman I loved died in my arms or I in hers along with our child." He shook his head, trying to order his thoughts. "We died together. Are you saying my destiny is for Dani and me to die together?"

  The look in Ira's eyes said it all.

  Alec tossed back a hearty laugh. "That's ridiculous." When Ira continued to stare, Alec tried to approach the situation from his perspective. "Look. In each past life, he, I...whatever...wasn't there when she really needed him. I was there when Dani really needed me. I was there when the accident occurred. I was there again after the nurse put that crap in her IV."

  "You hadn't established a personal relationship with her at that time. You have now. And don't try to deny it," he added quickly. "The attraction between the two of you is obvious, especially on your part. You can't hide it. Even the staff has noticed. You're following the same path as the people you were before, and it won't be long until she's pregnant."

  Grinding his teeth, Alec shoved a finger in Ira's face. "You're my colleague, not my mother. Don't lecture to me."

  "But I was your mother. Dani's too when she was Octavia."

  Turning away, Alec shook his head and braced his hands on the back of the recliner. "This is absurd."

  "At times it seems like that to me, too," Ira readily admitted. "But there's a pattern here which cannot be denied. There was a child, there was a danger, there was death. It's inevitable."

  Sucking in a breath, Alec swung around. "No, it isn't. I control my destiny. It does not control me. First of all, there will be no child. I'm more responsible than that-"

  "Because you've learned from past lives."

  Alec longed to roll his eyes. It was impossible to reason with someone who didn't want to listen. "And, secondly, I will be there for Dani. I have been there for her."

  "So far, but I believe neither of you have faced the ultimate danger, the final test."

  "If that should happen, I'll be there. I'll always be there when she needs me most."

  Ira lifted his palms. "How can you believe that? You're a doctor. You can't just drop what you're doing."

  "That's for me to worry about, not you. I love her. I'm not going to let her down."

  This time.

  Alec let those words remain silent, but they would forever be carved in his memory. This was what he had felt the night of the accident. She was depending on him. He was the only one who could save her. Now he knew why.

  Destiny might decree that they be together, but Alec would be damned if it meant they would die together-at least not right now. When they lived to be of extreme old age with great- great-great grandchildren running around their ankles, then he might reconsider. Until then, that part of destiny would not repeat itself.

  * * *

  Chapter Eighteen

  Clutching her sack lunch in her hand, Dani walked toward the teachers' tables. Space was already at a premium. The din of the multi-purpose room reverberated around her. Not that she wasn't used to it, but after a full morning of classes, of students whose concerns drifted from her to themselves and back again, she would have preferred a little quiet. Unfortunately, privacy was nonexistent wherever she chose to go-her classroom, the benches outside, the teachers' lounge-someone was always there.

  Three arms lifted as she neared. Pam, Alicia, and Diane-blonde, brunette, and redhead. What other teachers, and a few students, referred to as the triple threat.

  "We saved you a seat," they said in unison.

  Smiling, she hurried forward and slipped into the folding metal chair. In an instant the three leaned forward, chins braced on fists, smirks dancing on their lips.

  "So...who was that gorgeous looking man who dropped you off this morning?" Pam asked.

  Triple threat indeed. She was corralled and cornered. Escape was impossible.

  Dani ripped the Velcro open on her vinyl brown bag and studiously set out her meager lunch-an apple, a bag of carrot sticks, and string cheese. How in the world could she begin to explain about Alec?

  She twisted off the cap on her bottle of water while her gaze wandered to each woman. Their smirks were infectious.

  "His name is Alec Edwards. He is...was...is...my doctor." Bad choice of words, Dani.

  Alicia sat back and folded her arms across her chest. "Hmm, odd. My doctor never drove me to work before. And he certainly never gave me a good-bye kiss."

  Dani bit off a chunk of apple to hide the laughter that bubbled up. "Okay, so he's more than my doctor."

  The trio leaned closer. "Details. We want details."

  We went at it like two rabbits all weekend. We couldn't get enough of each other. "Believe me," she said with a laugh, "you can't handle the details."

  Pam nudged her arm. "Just a little tidbit to satisfy our rampant curiosity. You know how we love to live vicariously."

  "Let's just say this..." When Dani tried to take another bite of apple, Diane snatched it from her fingers. "All right...a tidbit. I've never met anyone like Alec before. He's domineering, determined to have his way, yet he treats me like a princess. And..."

  "What? What?" they pressed.

  Tears suddenly clouded Dani's vision. "And I'm so crazy in love with the guy my heart tightens every time I look at him. And for the life of me, I don't know how to tell him. It's only been a week. It's too soon."

  A chorus of "aws" and hugs followed. On the heels of that came a flurry of advice and suggestions while Dani picked at her food. She didn't have the heart
to tell them that this joyous, wondrous emotion scared the hell out of her. Thankfully, none of them made an issue of the diamond ring on her finger. It had been there since Alec found it. Dani didn't have a clue how to explain it to them.

  "Ladies, I hate to interrupt..."

  Conversation squealed to a halt as the four of them look up at the school principal. Ed Ferguson's face was red, dimming the effect of his red-blond hair. It was common occurrence, that red face, but no one knew if it was red because he was angry, embarrassed, sunburned, or just built that way. And no one took the chance to find out. He towered over students and teachers alike and never had to raise his voice. He was a gentle man who ruled by sheer power of personality, not by brute force.

  "Miss Morgan, I need to speak with you in my office as soon as you finish eating."

  "I'll be right there." She tossed the leftovers back into the bag and grabbed her purse. It was the perfect excuse to leave her well-meaning counselors.

  Mr. Ferguson was polite enough to wait for her, yet he didn't utter a word about the purpose of his summons.

  * * *

  Something was wrong. That feeling was verified when Dani saw Detective Regan sitting in the reception area with another man in a dark suit. Regan read the notices on the bulletin board while he waited. Both men glanced her way and stood.

  With no introduction, Mr. Ferguson ushered them into his office, then to the chairs. As the door clicked shut, the second detective pulled out his badge.

  "Miss Morgan, I'm Detective McDonald. Do you know a T.J. Costas?"

  Dani didn't spare his badge a look, but instead matched his steady gaze. "Of course, I do. He's one of my students. Has something happened? I noticed he was not in class today."

  McDonald stuffed his badge back into his pocket. "What do you know about his family?"

  "Not much, really. His father lost his job some time ago and they've been having trouble financially. His mother works nights cleaning office buildings. He rarely misses school. He's not the brightest student I have, but he tries."

  "Do you tutor him after school?"

  "Well, yes. I tutor several students." Her eyebrows inched together. "Why? What's going on? Is T.J. in some kind of trouble?"