Who Wants That Perfect Love Story Anyway 3: The FAM (Who Wants That Perfect Story Anyway)

by Natavia

  That was another thing that made me fall in love with him even more. He was doing something positive and was trying to leave selling drugs alone. The whole being a hustler’s wifey was just too much at times.

  I pulled into my driveway behind Killa’s Range Rover. Killa was never at his own house but I wasn’t complaining because I enjoyed his company even though he was possessive at times.

  I walked in and there he was sitting on the couch, smoking weed with a whole half-gallon of Hennessy that was half-way empty.

  “I thought you said you wasn’t smoking around me anymore,” I told him and he laughed.

  “Come here, Jamie, for a sec!” he said to me. Killa was acting really fucking weird. Maybe it was the studio that had him stressing. I guess I would have to tell him later because right now wasn’t the right time.

  I sat down next to him. “What’s the matter, baby?” I asked him.

  He takes out his phone and unlocks the screen. He pressed play and the conversation I had with Cam in the bathroom earlier at Walmart plays.

  “Who sent that to you?” I asked with tears in my eyes.

  He took a swig of his liquor.“ Quayla! She was in the bathroom when you and Cam walked in. She told me she was ready to walk out until she heard y’all voices. She actually called me and laughed at my dumb ass after she sent it to me! Her and her ratchet-ass friends were straight clowning a nigga in the background!” he said calmly. Killa was being too calm and it was scaring me.

  “You know the fucked up part about it, though? I’d figured something was up with you. I just thought maybe you lost it and didn’t want to tell me. There wasn’t any doctor’s appointments or nothing! Every time I asked you about one, there was always an excuse. But I never thought that you would do some bullshit like this to me! As selfish and childish as you are, I wouldn’t have guessed you would stoop so damn low! You are nothing but a ratchet-ass, bougie hoodrat! Quayla wouldn’t even do no shit like this and she is just as ratchet as they come. But then you made a fool out of me! Had me leaving the studio in the middle of a session just to check up on you. Bragging to my niggas on how the girl I love more than life was about to have my seed. Time and time again you always find a way to fuck with a nigga heart! But no matter what you did, I couldn’t bring myself to hate your ass like I hate you now! I fucking hate everything about you, Jamie!” he said, getting up.

  He took another swig finishing the rest then hurled the bottle into my living room window, shattering it. I couldn’t say anything because I knew I fucked up this time.

  “I’m sorry, I just didn’t want you to leave me!” I said with tears sliding down my face.

  He shook his head. “You knew I was just mad at the fact you was sticking up for that nigga after he disrespected you. I probably just needed time to cool off; that’s it! You were my fucking shorty! When he violated you, he violated me, too! But what the fuck do you do? Goes and sees the nigga at the hospital like you are still his fucking wife! Yeah, I’m not going to lie and say a nigga feelings wasn’t hurt, because I was! Yo, what the fuck do you think, I don’t have feelings? How many times have I asked you if you wasn’t ready and still wanted to be with him, let me know? Your triflin’ ass should’ve been had said something if you wasn’t ready for a real nigga! But you was the one who was telling me that you wanted to be with me! Those words came out of your mouth! You stay playing with a nigga feelings though! You lucky I’m calm because I thought of ten different ways to murder your ass and get away with it!” he said.

  “I just panicked because I thought it was finally over! I didn’t know what else to do! I never meant to hurt you and you are right! I am selfish! I have always been selfish when it comes to love! I don’t know why I’m so scared of it! But truth is, I am! You are a good man Kejuan, and honestly, I know I fucked up. So, I agree with you. I’m not ready and I’m sorry for hurting you. I just need time to myself to figure out what’s going on with me!” I cried. His eyes turned red and a tear escaped it. My chest tightened up because I had never seen him shed a tear, not even when I got that abortion.

  He stared at me in disbelief then turned around, walking out the door. He didn’t even shut it behind himself. I sat down on the couch and thought of all the memories of me and him from when we were teenagers.

  Six years ago…

  “Where are you taking me?” I asked Kejuan.

  “Come on, shorty, chill out! We are almost there!” he said. My eyes were covered almost the entire cab ride. It felt like we had been riding forever. All of the sudden, we stopped. He asked the cab driver what was the cost. After he paid him ten dollars, he got out. He opened my door and grabbed my hand. He led me down the steps.

  “Be careful, beautiful, we are almost there!” he said with excitement in his voice.

  “Okay!”

  “Stand right here and wait a few minutes while I set this up!” he said. I could hear him grabbing things and my lips curled into a smile. Kejuan was always doing something to make me happy.

  “Okay, take it off!” he said.

  I took the bandana off from around my eyes then gasped. We were in the middle of Quiet Waters Park with a blanket rolled out and a big McDonald’s bag on it. There were a few jar candles; the cheesy ones you get from the dollar store. I didn’t care about that, though, the gesture was what mattered and I was impressed. Last night on the phone, I told Kejuan that when I get older I wanted my man to surprise me with picnics. I didn’t think he would take me seriously. Although we were only sixteen, our love felt untouchable. Even though we were both young I knew what we had was real.

  He helped me down because my stomach was bulging out. I was five months pregnant with a girl. Cam and I found out yesterday at the family clinic I was having a girl. Cam had to use her older cousin’s ID to pretend she was over twenty-one so they wouldn’t notify my mom. Cam looked much older for her age because of her build. She was sixteen also but she could pass for twenty-two.

  Kejaun pulled our big mac’s from out of the bag. He also had some fries, a few apple pies and yogurt parfaits. He had a few sodas, also. I couldn’t believe how sweet he was. He rubbed my stomach. “How y’all feeling?” he asked. Truth was, Kejuan was more mature than I was, and sometimes his actions frightened me because I didn’t understand them.

  “Okay, just a little tired that’s all!” I told him. He sat down in front of me and started feeding me how the guys do the girls in the movies. When I got to my parfait there was something hard I clamped down on. I pulled it out and looked at it and it was a gold, diamond ring.

  “Kejuan, what is this?” I asked getting nervous because we were too young to get married.

  “It’s an engagement ring. I saved up all summer for it. After we graduate, we can get married and raise our daughter together. I think that’s the right way to do it. You know I don’t have any family. You two are the only ones I have,” he said sadly.

  “How are we going to tell my family we are having a baby? Royal would shit bricks because he takes care of us. They don’t even know we are together!” I stressed. I wasn’t ready to have a baby.

  “I know that, Jamie, but you know in a few years I will be playing professional basketball. It might be hard at first but we good as long as we have each other,” he said, kissing me.

  He slid the ring on my ring finger. It was gorgeous. It was gold with three diamonds going across the top.

  “You like it?” he asked.

  “Yes, Kejuan, I love it!” I said hugging him.

  After our picnic, we headed back to my house. The cab dropped me off down the street from my house. I walked home crying because I couldn’t have this baby. I found a clinic an hour away that did abortions when a woman was far along. I knew I would regret it but I wasn’t ready.

  I was sitting on my couch crying my heart out, remembering those moments Kejuan and I shared. I went upstairs to my bedroom and pulled out my old shoebox I kept hidden away. When Ashaun and I lived together, I had it hidden in the basement
vent but now I kept it under my bed. I took off the lid and there was some old letters we exchanged throughout the halls in school. A few pictures from when we went on a bus trip to Six Flags. I opened up a smaller box and there was my ring. I slid the ring down my ring finger. It was a little snug but it was still beautiful to me. It was simple and plain but, when I looked at it, I saw more than that; I saw love.

  My phone rang and it was Tataliscious. I answered the phone crying.

  “What the fuck is going on? Quayla post a video on her Facebook page with you and Cam talking in the background. Bitch, please don’t tell me this is a game! I swear bitch, I will kick your ass if you hurt that man like that! Your ass knows better! You fucked my night up!” he screamed into the phone. Quayla was really fucking with me but it’s all good, though. I had something for her ass the next time I saw her. I didn’t fault her for telling Killa but the bitch is just being messy now!

  “Can you please come over here? I need someone to talk to!” I cried into the phone.

  “Bitch, I’m on my way over there! You lucky I’m starting to feel sorry for you! I have the Vaseline in my purse along with my mace and timbs. I was going to come over and drag your ass out into the street and whip your ass! Bitch, I’m highly upset at you. You were my role model! I looked up to your selfish ass and now you just pissed me off! This is the only time I wish I was still a man so I could shove my dick down your throat and make you gag!” he fussed.

  I wanted to laugh though I wasn’t in the mood to. Tataliscious’s dick wasn’t going to make anyone gag. I saw it before he had the surgery and if I was him, I would’ve gotten a pussy, too.

  I hung up on him and poured me some liquor. I was a mess and I just needed someone to talk to. There was no way in hell I was calling Cam because she didn’t bite her tongue. She would’ve chewed me another asshole. Tee-Tee would be trying to fight me and I didn’t have time for that right now.

  Tataliscious walked in ten minutes later. My door had been sitting wide open since Killa left it that way. Tataliscious wasn’t lying when he said he was on his way.

  “No, you don’t bitch! You better not be sitting here crying like you give a fuck! You better be like Mary J. Blige when she sang how she wasn’t going to cry and not shed a damn tear! I ought to punch your retarded ass in the face! Raja ghetto, hoodrat ass wouldn’t even pull the ‘I’m pregnant’ card! Y’all bitches keep on and pretty soon all these niggas are going to have a bitch like me in their corner. Y’all complain how good men go gay when the fuck y’all confused-ass women don’t know how to keep them! Bitch, I done had it with y’all bitches! Call Tee-Tee and Cam and anyone else because we about to have a damn meeting!” he said snatching my Ciroc and downing it.

  “What’s up, Divas?” Raja said walking in. I just knew he called her because I didn’t. Tataliscious looked out the window.

  “Raja, you better go out there and pick your car up and bring it in here! You know Jamie’s neighbor has a dog. You walk outside and your car would be gone, buried in the neighbor’s backyard somewhere!” he said, talking about Raja’s Smart Car.

  “You know what, bitch! I done had it with your fairy dust-looking ass! How about I shove it up your ass! It wouldn’t be the first time having something shoved up it and damn sure won’t be the last!” Raja said. Here they go, ready to get into it.

  “Ohhhhh, bitch, you done came for me now Mrs. I Don’t Know Who My Baby Daddy is! I know your short ass better have a damn seat if you can reach one! And don’t think we don’t know about you fucking that lil’ nigga, Rico, neither!” Tataliscious said.

  “Wait a minute! What Rico? Please don’t tell me light-skinned, loud-mouthed Rico that be with Royal and them sometimes!” I said. Rico was a sexy, little thing but he reminded me of Corey. Having two Corey’s in the same room was just terrible. But it was funny when they clowned each other.

  “Yes, hunty! That Rico! He is telling people Raja is pregnant by him and when I talked to this little thot she says she doesn’t even know who it’s by. I can’t with y’all confused-ass bitches! If you ask me I think life would be much easier if y’all just turned gay. Y’all don’t need a damn man!” he spat.

  “Have you ever thought about why we women are scared of men? It’s because of bitches like you! Honestly, I’m scared of men now because I don’t know what team they are playing for! Every time I turn around, some nigga got caught fucking a bitch like you! Well, Tataliscious, how about you tell us what we need to know! Since a man knows what a man wants. Sorry, boo, we can’t be like you! Your ass on the other hand knows and that’s why they are coming to people like you. They can have the best of both worlds. Act like a lady and think like a man! That shit was made for y’all type of people because it, for damn sure, doesn’t work for us REAL women!” Raja snapped.

  “Okay, I got you, bitch! You can think but y’all are miserable! Raja I know you like Rico and that’s why you slept with Fitz big ass to make him mad. You found out he had a little hoodrat girlfriend and got pissed off. You think you are slick, bitch! I peeps every damn thing. I saw him creeping out your mama’s house one morning when I picked you up for work. I might have been born a boy but, hunty, I could get down with the baddest bitch! I might sleep with married men, but guess what? I’m a paid bitch! I drive a BMW and live in a luxurious condo! You on the other hand fuck with D-boys and all you get is a Smart Car and you still stay at home. So, trust me, bitch, that shit you is spitting is not flying no damn where!” Tataliscious spat, putting Raja in her place. They always told each other’s business but they were going to be best friends tomorrow.

  “See, this shit? People keep trying me because I’m short! But guess what? I brings bitches down a couple of notches! So I won’t have to reach up and smack their silly asses! Tataliscious, honestly, hunty, you are not happy with your life. All three of us in here are not happy! Jamie lost a good man. I’m mad because I’m in love with Rico and he has a girlfriend, and you are mad because all of your men are married. I might have a Smart Car and still stay at home with my mama, but that’s what it is Tata!”

  She paused for a second to check her phone. “At least I’m not blind to the bullshit like you are! I see my situation for what it is! You, on the other hand, think because someone spends money on you it’s something but it’s not! Those men are using you and you know it. They know they can sleep with you without taking you seriously. You are an illusion, Tata! You are not real! You act like a woman and look like a woman but you still are a man! You can’t carry babies and you for damn sure don’t bleed once a month. You are always snappy because you are not happy, neither! You sit up here knowing that we are going through something and you still have to be salty! You are battling love, too! So, don’t come for us, bitch! Sit your busy-looking ass down and talk to us like you got some sense sometimes!” Raja told him, shutting him right up. He rolled his eyes and sipped his drink.

  “Okay, bitch, back to you since you are the one that’s going through something serious. What’s going on?” Raja asked.

  “I lied about being pregnant so he wouldn’t leave me, and Quayla was in the bathroom when Cam and I were talking about it. I thought we were the only ones in there but we weren’t. But anyways, she sends him the recording and now he hates me! There is nothing that I can do about it. I mean, I know it’s finally over!” I told them. I’m happy that I didn’t mention anything about Liyah in the bathroom because I would be all over the news.

  “Okay, Jamie, what’s up with you? I mean really? There are women out here that want a man like Killa and I don’t understand. I mean, he opens the doors up for you and all of that. Men don’t do shit like that anymore! What is really wrong with you? I know it’s not Ashaun, it has to be something else that’s bothering you,” Raja said.

  “I’m afraid that one day he is going to want something that I can’t give him. I can’t carry children! What if he gets tired of me and has a baby by someone else? That’s heartbreak waiting to happen! It happened before and I’m scar
ed it may happen again,” I told them.

  “Doesn’t he already know that?” Tataliscious asked. I wasn’t used to him being like this. He was too normal acting. Raja done really told him about himself. He was too calm for my liking.

  “Yes, he does,” I answered.

  “He knows that and is willing to be with you anyway. That’s the gamble he is willing to take, not yours! He already knows the outcome if you get pregnant. You didn’t put a gun to his head and make him be with you. If it’s a baby he really wants then I don’t think he would’ve gotten back with you! The man really does love you! Why can’t you see that?” Tataliscious said to me.