The Big Bad

by Phil Beloin Jr.

  "Eddie," Pam said, coming over to the table and holding the icepack on his bruise, "where’s my brewski?"

  "No brewski for you, baby. We have work to do, remember?"

  "You’re a moo-cow, Eddie."

  "No, I’m not."

  "Are too."

  I got my beer opened.

  "I forget your Christian name," Eddie said to me. "The Mediterranean Mobster just kind of sticks in my head. Damn media—what an overbearing influence."

  "It’s Nick," I said.

  "Yeah, Nick," Pam said. "That’s it. I remember now. Nick Constantinople."

  "Constantinople is a place in Turkey, Pam,” Eddie said.

  "So? His parents could have named him after that. Right, Nick?"

  "I suppose."

  "See there, Eddie?"

  "But it’s Constantine," I said.

  "Oh, sorry," she said.

  "Forget it."

  "Anyhow," Eddie said, turning his attention back to me, "that’s a mighty fine right you have, Nick. That makes us even."

  "Yea," I said. "You understand."

  "Sure do. I was in the Army with their newspaper, served in nineties, did some time in the Gulf, know all about it. Let’s drink."

  We had some beer together.

  "Tell me, Nick," Eddie said, "what’s your stance on freedom of expression?”

  "Oh, what a God damn yawner, Eddie," she said, dropping the ice pack on the table. "Nick doesn’t care."

  "She’s right," I said.

  Swinging a leg around, Pam placed a foot in Eddie’s lap, fluttering her red and purple toenails. "What do you think of that?"

  "They look like a freaking Valentine’s Day card," Eddie said.

  "You’re a meanie, Eddie. What about you, Nickie?" She got her foot in my lap, her toes brushing my cock. Not by accident. "Well, what do you think?"

  As I looked into her face, I started to grow. Her eyes had that glazed kind of look as if I she was getting the screw of her life. I was completely hard in a second.

  I looked at Eddie, his eyes narrowed under the hairy brows. He looked none too pleased with her. "This place have any bourbon?" I asked him.

  Eddie lifted the trunk of his station wagon, revealing a few more cases, and what looked like a small generator. A thick cardboard box held some munchies and a few bottles of liquor.

  "I got scotch and I got bourbon," he said.

  "Bourbon will do it," I said.

  He grabbed the bottle. "I like a man who likes his corn mash," he said, slapping me on the back.

  I couldn’t stand the guy already, but I could see how he could charm Mona and Lisa into being his mule.

  I heard a dog barking from inside the barn and then Teddy came out, sweat collected on his brow.

  "What’s with the dog, Eddie?" I said.

  "I had no one to take care of him,” he said. “So, how’s it going?"

  Teddy grabbed another case from the passenger seat. "Fine, Twodees. I fed the dog, took him out and I’m bringing everything inside.”

  "Keep up the good work." Eddie watched the kid carrying the case into the barn. "Know what, Nick? We kinda’ could use a third person here and you and Teddy showing up, fit the bill."

  "I make four," I said.

  Eddie chucked. "That you do. Maybe you can help, too. I’d pay."

  "I don’t need the money, Eddie."

  "That’s right. You got a pretty penny from the Federal government, didn’t you?"

  "Something like that."

  "Over a mil if I remember correctly."

  "Forget it."

  "Hey, it’s forgotten man. You earned it—not me."

  "What the hell are you doing up here, man?”

  Shielding his eyes, Eddie looked up. "Hey, I gotta scramble. Save some of that bourbon for me later. Okay, buddy?"

  He slapped my shoulder again and walked into the woods by the side of the barn.

  I strolled into the barn. Teddy had stacked the cases in the sunlight created by the open doors. The rest of the place was in shadows, but I saw enough to tell the structure was in decent shape. A loft formed a big U above me. I heard some growling, and a shape shot out of gloom. I drew back, reaching for my .45 that wasn’t there. The leash drew tight and the dog dropped to the floor.

  “I’d say he likes you, Nick,” Teddy said.

  It was a black and tan Rottweiler and he was back on his feet, staring at me, showing teeth.

  “Yeah,” I said. “I’m a cat kinda’ guy.”

  "I guess they let you out," he said.

  "Yeah."

  "Why?"

  "Cuz I’m a nice guy,” I said. “I see Eddie’s put you to work, huh?"

  "I need the job," he said.

  "He already owes you."

  "He apologized for that, says he needs to get things organized, then I’ll get paid.”

  “Organize what things?”

  Teddy shrugged.

  Eddie wouldn’t be paying him shit. There’s a sucker born every minute, and I wondered when Teddy had entered the world. "What’s in these cases?” I kicked my foot towards them.

  “Don’t know. They’re locked.”

  “He even got a generator in his car.”

  “I know. I got to get that in, too,” he said. “Anyway, I don’t mind doing stuff. What else am I going to do while I’m staying up here?"

  "Have a couple of drinks. That’s what I’m doing."

  The Rottie barked.

  "Oh, Buck, hold on," Teddy said. He walked up to the dog and pulled a biscuit from his pocket. “Gentle,” he said.

  Buck took it nice and mindful of Teddy’s fingers.

  "Something’s bugging me, Nick," he said.

  "What’s that?"

  "It’s Pam," he said. "I don’t know, but she’s like, not the same."

  "What do you mean?" I said.

  "She doesn’t even want to talk to me—like she’s embarrassed that I’ve seen her with Eddie.”

  "People change, kid."

  "I just can’t believe she’s up here. It’s weird.”

  "Hey," I said, "just like you, she probably needs the money."

  "Still. I remember when we were in high school, she never dated. Tons of guys wanted to take her to the prom. She went with me. And when we had that apartment in Stitchfield, she went out a couple of times, but that’s it. I dated more than she did."

  "Didn’t need to know that last part, Teddy."

  "I’m just saying she’s Irv’s girl, but now’s she’s with Eddie. Is she seeing both of them or what?”

  Jesus, what was with this girl? Irv thought her hymen was still in one piece, Teddy thought she was a late blooming whore, and all I wanted—after knowing her for about fifteen minutes—was to bend her over the sofa and give her a ride.

  17

  I left Teddy to finish his mundane tasks and headed for the cabin. I saw the tip of Van Gogh’s tail poking out of the tall grass. Then he was moving, busting out in a sprint, leaving waves in the side yard as he hunted after something I didn’t see.

  I went through the sliding back door. The sunlight coming through the windows had heated the inside of the cabin and left the air heavy and unmovable. I grabbed a glass from the kitchen and found a bag of ice in the freezer. The cubes cracked as the bourbon went on top.

  I hit the porch, lying down in the lounge chair. The sun was baking here, too, but sitting on top of mountain I could see way off in the western sky where blue-black clouds had formed and seemed to be strolling our way. That could mean afternoon thunderstorms and a dip in the temperature. I unbuttoned my shirt midway and decided on a smoke.

  The drink cut through the dryness in my throat and the cigarette tasted fine all the way down into my lungs. I was starting to feel like myself again, just enough booze and cigs in me to keep the equilibrium right and my temper at bay.

  But what was I going to do now? Sit here till Friday getting buzzed while Eddie, Pam and now Teddy fooled around in the barn. Had Eddie moved his drug fac
tory up to the woods, with the Rottie to guard the works at night? But why would Pam help Eddie manufacture meth or ecstasy or whatever the fuck it was? Irv could give her all the money and drugs she wanted.

  Whatever it was, hanging around wouldn’t be so bad. I could look at Pam all day. But could I trust her? She had fooled Irv without too much trouble. Who would be next? Not me. That’s for goddamn sure.

  And then there was Eddie. Teddy hadn’t seen a paycheck yet, and my corn muffin lady friends had been screwed out of five gees.

  Mona and Lisa. I wondered if my apartment was stinking bad with decay—would the A.C. keep them cold? What if the city had a power outage? Couldn’t think about that shit.

  I closed my eyes against the brightness of the sun, thinking how I had watched Irv doing the combo to his safe. Same revs and numbers every time. He had never changed the order or stopping points—even when his old limo driver was stealing from him. When no one was around, I had popped that sucker open, just wanting to know I had the power of access. I never took a thing out of there, but before the weekend was through, I would.

  Tipping my head back for a sip, I knew I had lost control of my destiny and had to depend on others. These were serious issues that needed serious thinking. I finished my bourbon. I was too lazy to get more ice for a refill. I drank it neat, from the bottle.

  Then I saw Mona and Lisa walking up the stairs to my apartment. I was behind them ... squeezing their asses ... their laughter echoed in the tight space as I slid between them to open my apartment door.

  "Want your gun back?"

  It was Pam’s voice that cut the dream off. Or was it my memory of the rest of that night filtering back?

  "Huh?"

  She was sitting by the table, wearing a white jogging outfit. The shorts and jacket had red trim. Her hair was up above a sweatband on her forehead. My .45 lolled from her index finger. The safety was on for a change.

  "You fell asleep," she said.

  "No, I didn’t."

  "I saw you."

  "Why is everyone watching me sleep?"

  "Yeah," she said, "Teddy mentioned he was down in the cellar with you this morning."

  "Imagine having a nightmare and waking up to Teddy’s face staring at you."

  "He thinks you’re cute."

  "Shut it."

  "He told me so. But he’s also terrified of you."

  "He should be."

  "But I’m not," she said.

  "No?"

  "You don’t scare me at all. You’re just another guy with too much testosterone."

  I reached over, took my .45 from her. "And a gun."

  "I got a gun, too. A girl can never be too careful."

  "And what are you afraid of that you’re caring a gun around?"

  "Maybe, it’s guys like you," she said.

  "Don’t worry about me."

  "Irv told me you used to be his bodyguard."

  "Among other things, yeah."

  "I need you to do that for me while I go for a walk."

  "What about my nap here?"

  "I need my exercise, stay lean and fit."

  "You look lean and fit to me already."

  "Why thank you, Nick."

  "It’s true."

  "But there’s bears out there. All over the place."

  "Bullshit."

  "What if I fall, hurt my ankle?"

  "Tell you what," I said. "Grab a couple of bottles of beer and I’ll go with you."

  "I have a small cooler," she said. "We could probably get more than two in there."

  I felt better that the .45 was back under my shirt. Pam and I walked down the front yard, me holding a plastic cooler. She had fit six bottles around plenty of ice. The heat had kicked up some more, and my forehead was dripping like a leaky faucet before we got around the log blocking the top of the driveway and reached the shade of the woods.

  "I love going for walks," Pam said. "Being outside, all this fresh air."

  "Yeah," I said. "I’m gonna have a smoke."

  "I could use one, too."

  I doled out the cigarettes and beer. We stayed on the driveway, watching not to step in any ruts and washouts.

  "Your father still own this place?" I asked.

  "He never did. It was my mother’s. When she died, she entrusted it to me. A lawyer takes care of the expenses, and I get it when I turn twenty-five."

  "You ever mention the cabin to Irv?"

  "I might have in passing."

  "Great."

  "He won’t remember, Nick. It might have been as many as three years ago when I first starting talking to him in prison. And even then it would have been vague, like I got this cabin near Antler Lake or something. No real detail or an address."

  "Then he won’t find you up here.”

  "See, you’re thinking like a bodyguard."

  The skeeters found us then, hordes of them buzzing around our heads, going for the ears and the wetness of the eyes. We blew smoke around and that fended them off some.

  "What’s on that tape Irv’s got on you?" she said.

  I sucked on my beer. "Why do you care?"

  "Maybe there is no tape. Maybe you and Irv patched things up."

  "I wish."

  "One time Irv said you liked doing, let me quote, ‘Bad things.’ Sometimes it worried him how much you enjoyed breaking heads."

  "Blame my father," I said.

  "Consider him blamed."

  We walked a little further down the incline until Pam spotted an old trail that ran parallel to the mountain. The path was narrow and disappeared in spots, but Pam had no trouble leading the way. I followed behind, watching her hips move side to side, figuring it was nothing more than something for me to look at.

  "Why are you and Eddie up here anyways?" I said.

  She looked over her shoulder, those green eyes wide and bright. "Eddie didn’t tell you?”

  "Nope.”

  "Well, then, Eddie’s in charge,” she said. “It’s up to him.”

  “Come on.”

  “Now I’m the one saying nope.”

  We moseyed along the path.

  “Say, Nickie, have you ever done it outside? In the woods or under the stars?"

  "What? Go for a walk?”

  "Make whoopee, silly."

  "Nah. Was I supposed to?"

  "Oh, you’re missing something there."

  "I’m still young."

  "Sort of, anyway."

  "Hey, I ain’t as old as Eddie."

  "Eddie spaghetti."

  The forest was as busy as a big city; crows cawing over the rest of the birds, squirrels scrambling on the trees and chattering it up, bigger animals crunching leaves getting out of our way.

  "Teddy can’t believe you’re up here with Eddie," I said, wanting to hear her talk, to see where the conversation went.

  "I love Teddy. I’ve always considered him my brother. That’s why I told Irv that. Teddy and I had been through a lot growing up together, but I felt like he was stifling me a little, not letting me be who I am. Then he started on me about Irv, fighting all the time. I just had to leave.”

  “How’d you and Eddie get together?”

  She stopped and handed over her empty beer bottle. "Get me another, will ya?"

  I got two more out, twisted the top off of hers. "Here."

  "Thanks." She did a slow sip using a lot of lip.

  "You and Eddie?” I said again.

  "This was a few months before I even knew Irv would get released. I needed a job, something until Irv was free and Eddie had an ad running for a secretary. I showed up at his office. One thing led to another and here I am.”

  I laughed. "How’d you ever convince Irv you were a saint?”

  She chuckled and it drifted through the woods.

  "Ah, hell, you’re just after his money," I said.

  She started walking again. I liked the way her shoulder blades arched in her back and the way her ass had attitude when it jiggled.

  "I wasn’t
at first. When he was in prison, I actually felt kinda’ sorry for him. Then he started telling me all the shit he was into—drugs, hooking, loan sharking—like I was his conscious or counselor. He said he was going right back to it when he got out—except snorting coke. He liked being sober—it kept his mind sharp. I’ve been thinking a lot these last three weeks and I like my freedom, don’t want to have to report in, so off I went to teach him a lesson.”

  “He’ll possess you,” I said.

  "Not me, he won’t.”

  "You’re playing with fire, Pam."

  "You wanna be the extinguisher?"

  "Now that’s lame."

  "Yep, I agree."

  We came into a little clearing, and near the center, covered in moss and spotted sunlight, was a large flat rock. Her butt went on it.

  "I’m pooped," she said. "And hot."

  "Probably too much beer," I said, taking a seat next to her. My face and shirt were drenched. I reached for another smoke, offered the pack, but she shook her head.

  I got the cigarette up and running. "You gonna keep working with Eddie then?”

  "This girl likes gainful employment."

  "I still can’t believe you convinced Irv you’re a virgin," I said. "It’s pretty damn funny."

  "It was pretty damn easy, too."

  "Before he went to jail, he’d do anything and everything that moved."

  "Oh, he wanted it bad when he got out of prison. Believe me. We were in his limo heading back to his house in Nova and he’s throwing himself on me."

  "Sounds like Irv."

  "I said I wanted to wait. He starts whining about his needs. How he stopped masturbating in prison and now he has to have it really bad. He’s begging me to at least suck him. So to hold him off, I told I’ve never done fellatio, let alone had sex, and that I wanted the place to be special—not in a backseat of a moving car. He looked shocked and then it excited him in more. I could see the bulge in his pants. I started rubbing it, figuring it would keep him pacified."

  "Sure," I said. "Sure."

  "Then he takes his pants down and pulls the thing out and damn it, Nick, if it ain’t twelve inches long. Had these thick popping veins and this vicious curve."

  "Yeah, I had heard rumors about him."

  "What? Where?"

  "Forget it."

  "Anyhow, something like that might just split me in half. He goes, ‘What do you think of that piece of meat, baby?’ and I say, ‘Oh, wow,’ gasping, getting all excited myself, wanting to see if it would, in fact, split me in two. I start jerking him, and I have to look away, I’m getting so hot touching it and I’ll want to jump right on that thing. Know what I mean?"