The Wanderers Beginning: The Wanderers, Reborn, & Unforgiven

by Jessica Miller

  I stepped out into the hall closing the door behind me. “I couldn't sleep,” I confessed.

  “Do you...want to come in?” He offered. His hesitation told me he wasn't sure if he should ask or not. The dark circles and bags under his eyes indicated he'd been through enough tonight and shouldn't be left alone.

  I quickly checked on Josie and then joined Tristan in his room. I know I should have been concerned about the dream I just had about him. I knew I should be afraid, but wasn’t. I was conflicted. Part of me knew Tristan would never harm me. The other part was just not so sure of anything anymore.

  He didn't bother to turn on the lights. He just guided me to the bed to sit down. “Is your roommate here?” I whispered.

  “I don't have one,” he said, making himself a drink.

  I didn't feel as comfortable now knowing Tristan didn't have a roommate. It's not that I felt he was dangerous, it was more dangerous in the way that I might not be able to stop myself if he tried to kiss me again.

  I shifted nervously while we sat in silence. “What happened?” I asked, finding the courage to speak.

  He set his drink aside and sat next to me on the bed. I felt the need to stand up. Being this close to him was making my stomach twist up in knots. But I was afraid if I got up he might think I was afraid of him and I didn't want him to feel worse than he already did. So instead I sat on my hands to try and control my uneasiness. I waited patiently for his response. When he didn't give me one I thought maybe he didn't want to talk about it.

  I was about to say something else when he said, “They had nothing on me so they had to let me go.” I kept quiet. “You believe me right? You know I didn't do it.”

  “Of course I do.” And I really did. Despite my disturbing dream, I knew enough to know Tristan wasn't capable of something like this. My gut was telling me he didn't do this, he couldn't have done this. I was taught to always go with my gut instinct and that's what I was doing. I believed he was innocent.

  “Ella,” he looked up at me. There was pain and sadness in his eyes. “Stay with me,” he said in a hushed voice.

  I didn't say a word.

  I just pulled him down on the bed and wrapped his arms around me. Then I closed my eyes and prayed that everything would be okay. I prayed that I wouldn't have any more dreams tonight. I prayed that everyone would make it through this tragedy and that the monster that did this would be caught.

  “Ella?”

  “Yeah?” I said, voice shaky.

  “You know what would really make me feel better?”

  Before I even said it, I knew I was setting myself up. “What's that?”

  “If you got naked.”

  I didn't have to see his face to know he was wearing his cocky smile. I didn't even respond. Instead I just elbowed him in the ribs and smiled to myself. “Ow!” he complained.

  “Goodnight Tristan.”

  “It was just a suggestion.”

  I sighed and tried to hide my smile. “Goodnight,” I repeated.

  He just gripped me tighter until we fell asleep.

  Chapter eleven

  When I awoke in the morning, I looked down to see Tristan's hand cupping my breast. I rolled my eyes and tried to lift his hand away, but all it did was cause him to move closer and reach around to my other breast. “Tristan!”

  “Mm,” he moaned grumpily.

  “Tristan, wake up!”

  “Hmm?” He lifted his head to look at me.

  “You mind?”

  He smiled. “No, I don't.”

  I smacked him. “Ow Ella, I do bruise you know.” He sat up, stretching his arms above his head.

  “I should go,” I said, getting up and making my way to the door.

  “You don't have to,” he said with a small desperation in his voice.

  “I do. I have class and need to get ready,” I said, trying to avoid an awkward situation.

  He lied back down and pulled the covers up over his head. I stifled an eye roll and headed back to my room. I carefully and quietly opened the door to my room and tiptoed in, cautious not to wake Josie. “Where have you been?” Josie yelled, startling me, and causing me to jump.

  I put my hand over my racing heart and wondered if this was what it was like to have a heart attack. “Shit Josie, you scared me.”

  “You didn't answer my question,” she said, giving me that sour look she always did when she knew I was hiding something.

  “I was in the bathroom,” I said defensively. I wasn't about to try and explain me spending the night with Tristan.

  “Since three in the morning,” she said, looking at me skeptically. “Either that's some serious case of diarrhea or you're full of crap.”

  I sighed, knowing I'd have to tell her the truth or she wouldn't drop it. “I was with Tristan.”

  A giant grin splayed across her face. “Tell me everything!” she demanded

  “There's nothing to tell,” I said, heading to my dresser to put on more appropriate clothes for class.

  “Ella, you just spent the night with a guy who is notorious for hooking up with girls all over campus.”

  “Don't remind me,” I thought to myself.

  “I didn't technically spend the night. Besides, all we did was sleep. That's it.” I emphasized the last two words making it a point I did not want to talk about it anymore. Josie got the hint and I finished getting ready for class.

  When I left, I expected Jack to be waiting for me like he always did, but he wasn't. I knocked on his door and his roommate said he already left. I didn't give it a second thought and headed to my first class.

  Outside, there were news vans and reporters everywhere, reporting about the recent tragedy that hit our campus. Some were interviewing different students, asking them how they felt about what happened, if they knew Skylar. I avoided them the best I could.

  When I got to my first class I saw Jack, but he was already sitting with someone else. I waved to him, but he didn't even acknowledge me. I sat down and got out my books, wondering why he was acting so weird. I thought I'd just catch him after class and find out.

  When class was over, I collected my things, and hurried over to Jack, but he was too fast and I couldn't keep up. At our next class, I sat near the door so he would have to pass me to leave. “Jack!” I called to him, but he ignored me. “Jack wait up,” I said, finally catching up to him. “Hey.” I grabbed his arm stopping him. “Are you mad at me or something?”

  He glared slightly and I took that as a yes. “What did I do to make you so mad?”

  “You of all people, you'd be the last one I'd expect to fall for his crap,” he said, turning to walk away again.

  “Jack, what are you talking about?”

  “I saw you Ella. I saw you coming out of Tristan's room this morning,” he said with a harsh tone. “You are no different than all the rest.”

  I gaped at him, taking a step back as if he had slapped me in the face. “First off, that's none of your business and next time you should think before jumping to conclusions,” I said, stomping off.

  The nerve of him to be mad at me for something he didn't know anything about. What did he care anyway? God, guys are so ridiculous.

  I wasn't watching where I was going and nearly ran into Tristan. “Whoa, easy there love.” He looked at me, brows creasing. “You alright?”

  “It's nothing,” I said, brushing it off. “What are you doing up? I thought you'd still be in bed?”

  “It felt too empty without you there,” he cooed, brushing his thumb across my cheek.

  “Tristan.” I pulled his hand away and held it in front of me gently. “Last night was...”

  “Amazing,” he commented.

  “Was a onetime only thing,” I finished.

  I saw a tiny flash of hurt in his eyes, but he quickly recovered. “You say that now, but I still managed to get you in bed with me and all I had to do was get arrested,” he said, throwing me his cocky smile. “I'm a little disappointed. I thought you
had better morals than that. Hopping into bed with a guy you barely know.” He shook his head tsking.

  I rolled my eyes and pushed him playfully. “Is there something you wanted, besides bugging me and driving me nuts?”

  “I thought I'd escort a pretty lady to class,” he said, extending his arm to me. I gave him one of my many ‘I'm not in the mood’ looks and he dropped it. I walked with him to art class in silence.

  Jack had beaten us there and was waiting for me at the door. “Ella, can I talk to you?” he asked with a sullen expression. Tristan stood against the wall with his arms crossed watching. “Do you mind?” Jack asked annoyed.

  “Actually, I do,” Tristan said, standing up straight.

  “Tristan, give us a minute.” He looked at me thinking I was kidding and I let him know I wasn't. He gave Jack a caveat look before heading into class.

  Now I was the one standing with my arms crossed waiting for Jack to speak. “Ella, I'm sorry. You're right, it was none of my business, and I was out of line. I jumped to conclusions and I shouldn't have. Forgive me, please.”

  He seemed sincerely sorry. I didn't blame him for getting upset. I can't imagine what was going through his head when he saw me sneak out of Tristan's room this morning. I decided to let him off the hook. “I'll accept your apology this time, but next time I won't be so forgiving.”

  “Thank you and I won't do it again, promise,” he said, biting his bottom lip, waiting for my acceptance.

  “C'mon, we're going to be late,” I said, giving him a slight smile and heading into the classroom.

  Tristan had saved me a seat, but I thought it best if I didn't sit next to either of them. Today, I chose to sit next to the smelly kid, forcing Jack to sit next to Tristan. I thought maybe having to sit next to each other would do them some good. Maybe they'd talk to each other and realize they have some things in common. Just maybe, maybe even start to like each other.

  I guess it was just wishful thinking. The tension between them was felt through the entire room. I didn’t understand why they were that way towards each other. Obviously it's some weird guy jealousy thing.

  After class, both Tristan and Jack waited for me. I didn't know what to do. They both had uneasy expressions on their faces. “Jack, can I talk to you for a minute?” The professor asked.

  Jack looked at me. “Go ahead, I'll catch up with you later,” he said looking a little defeated.

  Tristan smiled cockily and escorted me outside. “What is the deal with you and Jack?” I asked, getting straight to the point.

  Tristan let out a long sigh. “Something about him just bugs me.”

  “Would that be jealousy, maybe?” I teased.

  He looked down at me, eyes slanted, and I knew I struck a nerve. “I don't get jealous.”

  “Please.”

  “What do I have to be jealous about? I can have anything and anyone I want.”

  “Not anyone,” I corrected.

  “In due time la mia bella stella,” he said, flicking my chin with his finger. I just shook my head as he draped his arm over me. I removed his arm. He seemed to think nothing of it as he followed me back to the dorms.

  “What are your plans for tonight?” Tristan asked when we reached my room.

  “Homework,” I said, opening the door. He followed me in. “Are you lost?” I questioned as he made himself comfortable on my bed.

  “I thought we'd take a nap,” he said, padding the spot next to him.

  “Uh-No,” I replied throwing my stuff down. I leaned up casually against my chair with my arms crossed waiting for him to leave. He cocked his head to the side gesturing for me to join him again, flashing me an enticing smile. I was tempted, but stood my ground.

  When I didn't join him, he lied back, and pretended to go to sleep. “Tristan.” He didn't answer. “Tristan,” I said a little louder this time – still nothing. Annoyed, I walked over to the bed and shook him. “Tristan, I know you're not really sleeping so get up.” He still ignored me. I leaned over him, checking to see if he was faking. I saw a slight smile on his face and he grabbed me pulling me over top of him. I yelped. “Tristan!” I laughed. He hugged me tight with my legs still draped over the side of him.

  He nuzzled his head against my chest. “This is much better,” he purred.

  “Oh I'm sure,” I laughed.

  “You can't deny that last night wasn't the best sleep you had in your life,” he said matter of fact.

  It was true, but I wouldn't admit that to him. “You call getting groped in your sleep a good night's rest?”

  “No, I call that a great night,” he smirked. I smacked him playfully and he laughed. Then I tried to get up but he just held me tighter. “Don't go.”

  “This is my room remember. You are the one who needs to go.”

  “In a minute.”

  “You're never going to let me go are you?”

  “Nope.”

  As much as I wanted to stay this way forever, I couldn't, and the longer Tristan held me, the more comfortable I became in his arms. I couldn't risk myself falling harder for Tristan more than I already have. I knew we would never work and it was better not to even get involved. I found my strength and forced myself to get up. I managed to get myself into a sitting position and then I swung my legs over to the other side so I could get up. “Where are you going?” Tristan complained.

  “I have stuff to do.”

  “No you don't,” he said, grabbing me again and pulling me back down.

  “Tristan,” I complained, pushing him back.

  “What could be more pressing than staying here and snuggling with me?”

  “Everything,” I said.

  “Just for that I'm not letting you go,” he said, wrapping his arms and legs around me.

  I pushed and pulled with all my might, but he wouldn't budge. “Okay seriously?” The more I struggled the more he laughed. “It's not funny jerk! Let me go.”

  Eventually he loosened his legs allowing me to break free. I believe he only did that because I threatened to punch him in the nuts if he didn't. He still had me in a bear hug me though. I slipped my one arm out by pinching him. “Ow Ella, you're so abusive,” he whined.

  “That's what you get,” I said, sticking my tongue out like any mature adult would. I stood up to finally get some breathing room.

  “That's it. I had enough of your abuse,” Tristan said, wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me back down on the bed. I screamed as he tackled me. We wrestled back and forth, laughing. I found his tickle spot giving me the advantage, but he was fast and kept getting the upper hand. He had me pinned with my arms above my head and his body pressing down on mine. I stopped resisting, but he didn't let go. He was panting and smiling over his victory. He stared deep into my eyes making my heart race.

  This is it, I thought.

  He's going to kiss me.

  And I won't be able to stop him.

  At such close range it would be harder to fight. I waited for him to make his move and braced myself when he tilted his head slightly and leaned in. “Ella,” he whispered.

  “Yes?” I asked breathless.

  “Will you go out with me?”

  “What?” I said, caught unaware.

  “On a date, you know dinner and a movie type thing.”

  “Tristan, I...”

  “Just one date Ella, one date. What's it going to hurt?”

  That was the nagging question in the back of my mind. Would I get hurt when this was all over?

  I looked at his hopeful eyes. “If I say yes will you get off of me?” He smiled and sat back releasing me. Now that I could breathe again, my head started to clear. I looked up at his face to see he was wearing a goofy grin. “What's so funny?”

  He shook his head and laughed. “You're too easy.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “Nothing,” he said, smiling slyly. “So what time am I picking you up?”

  “I never actually said yes,” I retorted.

&nb
sp; “I let you go, did I not?”

  “Fine,” I huffed. “Seven o'clock, dinner, that's it, and no funny business.”

  “Wouldn't dream of it,” he winked and took off. He knew by now if he stuck around he would press his luck and I would change my mind

  “What have I done,” I groaned, falling back on my bed.

  “That doesn't sound good,” Josie commented as she came into the room. “Do I even want to ask?”

  “No,” I said, throwing my arms over my head.

  “What is it?” Josie asked. She lied on her bed resting her head on her hands waiting for a further explanation.

  “Tristan asked me out,” I mumbled.

  “Doesn't he always? What's so different this time?”

  “I said yes.”

  “No...way.” I looked over to see she had the biggest grin on her face. “Ella Oh my God!” She giggled. “This is so exciting! What are you going to wear?”

  “Only you would be excited about this,” I grumbled.

  “Why? Aren't you?”

  “I don't know,” I sat up and looked at her. “I mostly said yes so he would leave me alone.”

  “Oh,” she said a little disappointed. “But aren't you the least bit curious to see what he's like on a date?”

  “Kinda,” I confessed. “I mean, in a way, yes I want to go, but at the same time I'm kind of scared.”

  Josie got up and sat next to me on my bed. “Oh honey, what are you afraid of?”

  “That I might actually have fun.”

  “And what's wrong with that?” Josie said, looking at me like I was crazy.

  “Because if I allow myself to like him, I know I'm going to get hurt.”

  “Ella, you can't worry about the ’what ifs’ all the time or you'll never let yourself have any fun. Sometimes you have to take some risks.”

  “Yes, but is this a risk worth taking?”

  “I say hell yes!”

  “That's what you also said about me going blond and we both know how well that turned out,” I glared, remembering I had to cut all my hair off because of how damaged it was. Never let friends color your hair.

  “Okay that was a bad example,” she said sheepishly. Her way of making up for it was buying me tons of hats. “Besides, this is totally different. I just so happen to know, for a fact, that this boy is crazy about you.”