“Do you regret marrying her then?” Drew asked around the knot in his throat. He couldn’t ask the more dangerous question—did his father regret having him?
“No. Even at my darkest times, and still to this day, I don’t regret that. Despite everything, I have never regretted the time I had with your mother.”
At the words, it clicked with Drew what his father was saying—in his own roundabout way. He chuckled despite the weight on his heart. “Are you trying to tell me that it’s better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all?”
“Maybe not quite in those words, but yes, I guess I am. I know how you felt about Becca before you left. I was so happy when I learned that you two had decided to make a go of it. Sometimes fantasies are just that, though. One day, you’ll meet someone that will make you the best you that you can be. They’ll make what you had with Becca feel meaningless by comparison.”
Drew didn’t have the heart to tell his father that he thought he might have already found that someone. Found and lost again to be more precise.
Never really had in the first place.
He wished there was some way of reversing time and going back to the moments before he decided to leave Orange County. True, his life then had been a tad on the predictable and dull side, but he’d also never felt the sting of rejection. He’d never had fun, had never bowled, never watched stupid kids’ movies just for the heck of it, and had never walked in a dangerous park late at night in the cold while eating ice cream either.
“Cathy thinks I should just get away from it all for a while,” Drew said.
“I think that’s a good idea. She’s a smart woman.”
“Don’t you need me at the hospital though?”
“This may come as a shock to you, but the hospital doesn’t stop operating just because one doctor doesn’t turn up for work. I’ve taken you off most of the rotations anyway because I was concerned about you. Take a week, two even, and I think your patients will thank you for it. You’re no good distracted like you are.”
“I guess you’re right. How soon can you arrange for me to leave?”
“You can leave tonight if you want. I’ve already lined up a contingency plan after what happened with Mr. O’Brien today.”
Drew groaned into his hands as he recalled the terrible slip of his tongue.
“It won’t go any further, this time, but I can’t guarantee that will be the case if anything like that happens again. You’re just lucky that Becca—”
“I know, Dad. It’s not like I meant to say it.”
Dale placed his hand on Drew’s shoulder. “I know. That’s why I know you need some time to yourself. But first, let’s eat.”
Amity watched Drew drive away for as long as she dared. Then she spun on her heels, only to wind up face-to-face with Michael.
“What did you do?” he asked, nodding in the direction in which Drew’s taillights had disappeared.
“I’m not in the mood for this,” she said. She took two steps to get away from him, the first in Flint, the second in LA. It was still too early for the nightclub she’d materialized in to be opened, but she hoped for some peace and quiet in the somewhat familiar surroundings. She clutched the sink in front of her and closed her eyes.
“Do you believe I will let you shake me that easily?” Michael’s voice was right behind her, even though she was in the ladies’ bathroom.
“Can’t you just leave it alone, Michael?” she begged. She really couldn’t deal with her overbearing brother so soon after what had just happened.
“What is wrong, Amitiel?”
She flinched at the name, a harsh reminder of Drew using it to drive her away only a short time earlier. The sound of it was like a stake to the heart and in that moment. She hated her given name more than she ever had before. “I’ve told you, it’s Amity. And I asked you to leave it alone.”
He put his hand on her shoulder and spun her around. “You know better than that. I cannot just leave it when you are so upset. It clouds my judgement.”
“I shouldn’t have taken the assignment. I should have just left it all how it was. I was okay before you made me do this.” Tears pricked her eyes, but she wouldn’t let them fall while Michael was nearby.
“Talk to me, Amity. That is why I’m here. Tell me what happened.” He used his compulsive tone on her, even though it didn’t work as well on other angels.
“You mean you weren’t watching over me with your all-knowing radar?”
“Contrary to your obvious belief, I do not spend my every waking minute watching over everything, just as you do not personally oversee the deliverance of every truth in the world.”
“I’m not in the mood for your crap, Michael. Is there something you wanted?”
“All I wanted was to check that you were all right.”
“I’m fine,” she lied. There was no way she could explain to Michael the intricacies of what she was going through. Even if he gleaned what he could from her grace, it was likely to be the jumble of random thoughts racing through her own mind. She had no clarity on anything, but unfortunately, the only person who could help her gain that clarity didn’t want to see her again.
It’s probably for the best, she lied to herself.
“I just wasn’t ready to go on an assignment. Especially not this one. You should have listened when I said I was on vacation.”
Michael wrapped his arms around her, and she felt his grace envelop her as well. “Amitiel, you are stronger than you believe, wiser than you’ll acknowledge, and better than you let yourself be. You feel so much more than any of us. You always have. I know Drew is still hurting. I can feel that much. You need to help him heal or he will be doomed to misery for his remaining days.”
Amity huffed out a breath, trying to force her irritation at Michael’s words from her body together with the air. “He doesn’t want to see me again. What exactly would you have me do?”
“He doesn’t have to see you. You know that. I am certain you will find the best way to resolve this situation if you just allow yourself to be true to who you are.”
In spite of herself, and the tangles she’d tied her heart and mind into, Amity felt a little spurred by his words. She wasn’t sure she could deal with being in close proximity to Drew without the benefit of talking to him, but it was certainly an option until he could heal his wounds himself. Nothing good would come from running. Michael was right. It would only hurt Drew more if she did. Besides, she’d run, in one method or another, for far too long. With her decision firming in her mind, she looked up at Michael, and offered him a genuine smile of gratitude. “I—I think I know what to do now.”
She just needed to find the courage to do it and call in a few favors to guarantee some private time. She could only hope Peter would be willing to help and that Drew would be willing to agree.
Chapter Seventeen
After the depressed start to dinner at his father’s house, Drew actually found himself enjoying being out of the house filled with reminders of the two women he’d cared for. Eventually, his father and Addy were able to take his mind off the day he’d had and he was able to relax a little. If he’d been in any doubt over his choice to take a break from the shit that life had thrown at him in the last few weeks, it was completely removed by the time he left his father’s house. In fact, by the time he’d slid behind the wheel of his car, he had a solid plan in place and a promise to his father to return in a week without the baggage he’d carried around with him since Becca had unceremoniously dumped him.
His plan was to do the one thing that Amity had been trying to get him to do since she’d first appeared in his life: to do something spontaneous and fun. After getting home and packing his suitcase, he slept restlessly as the reality of what he was going to do settled over him as a growing knot in his stomach. It was crazy and impulsive—everything he wasn’t but maybe needed to be for a while.
Early the next morning, he drove straight for the airport with his p
assport and luggage. He strode up to the first desk he saw and slapped his credit card onto the counter.
“One return ticket to anywhere,” he said with a confidence he didn’t really feel.
The man behind the counter, Ted according to the name badge pinned to his immaculately pressed suit, appraised Drew with barely concealed contempt. For a moment, Drew regretted getting dressed in such a hurry, he’d just been so anxious to get moving before he became so paralyzed with fear over the unknown that he backed out entirely.
“I’m sorry, sir, I need to input a destination.”
“The next flight, where’s it going?”
Ted raised an eyebrow at him before turning to his computer with what appeared to be a deliberate slowness. He hmm’d and typed, before pausing to give Drew another withering glare, sighing, and turning back to type in a few more lazy letters.
“Well?” Drew asked as his irritation got the better of him.
“It’s going to Chicago.”
“One ticket to Chicago then.”
“I’m sorry, sir, the soonest I can get you on a plane to Chicago would be tomorrow afternoon.”
“But you just said the next flight’s going there.”
“It is, sir,” each time Ted said the word, he sneered it just a little more. He clearly thought Drew was being a menace or wasting the airline’s precious time. “But that flight is fully booked.”
“What about the flight after that?” Drew asked. He was over the conversation already.
If he’d known spontaneous was going to earn such contempt, he would have planned in advance.
“Tampa Bay.”
“Are there any seats available?”
“There are two seats.”
“Well, I’ll take that one then.”
“So you don’t want a ticket to Chicago?”
“No.”
“Just a second, please,” Ted said before muttering something under his breath. A moment later, he returned to his slow tapping on the keys.
In an attempt to avoid saying something overly rude to the booking clerk from Hell, Drew turned to survey the slowly growing crowd around him. A giggling couple raced to the next counter, spoke with the woman with the perfectly coiffed hair standing behind it for a few moments, handed over their credit card, and then received tickets almost immediately. Drew was starting to regret his choice in helpers when Ted cleared his throat.
“I’m sorry, sir, there are no seats available on that flight.”
Drew’s fingers curled into fists and he took a couple of deep breaths. “I just want the next ticket on the next flight that is leaving this airport with a free seat that I can purchase. Do you think you might possibly be able to manage that?”
Ted looked down his beak-like nose at Drew. “I am trying to help you, sir. I do not need to accept your attitude.”
Drew blinked in disbelief. “My attitude? My attitude?” he practically shouted at the clerk.
“If you don’t calm down, sir, I will have to call my manager.”
“Call your fucking manager,” Drew said, hoping that Ted’s manager might be able to get him to actually do his job sometime before Drew strangled him. “And maybe we can discuss the incompetence of the staff here.”
Ted gasped in surprise and looked like he was going to say something, but then his eyes focused on a spot over Drew’s right shoulder. Whatever he saw, he appreciated.
Drew turned to look in the same direction. When he saw what had caught the clerk’s eye, he stopped breathing. Gliding toward the desk where he stood, was a blonde-haired angel. Literally. He wondered why Amity was there after the way things had ended the night before. Hadn’t he made it clear that he wanted her gone—with his words at least even if he hadn’t meant them in his heart. Why she was dressed in a skin-tight, red mini-dress was another mystery, but one he was less inclined to worry about when he at least had the chance to study her one last time.
When his gaze met hers, and her lips curled into a cautious smile, his heart leapt into his throat. He swallowed hard to push down the emotions that the sight of her, smiling and strolling toward him, stirred within him.
Knowing he didn’t want to have a confrontation with Amity in front of the obnoxious Ted, Drew moved away from the desk without another word. As he moved, dragging his suitcase along behind him, Amity started to walk faster, racing toward him with a greater urgency. In fact, her ever quickening strides made him think something must have been dreadfully wrong. Had she been sent by Heaven to deliver even worse news than everything he’d learned so far?
He found his own steps quickening to cover the distance between them, the wheels on his suitcase click-clicking loudly behind him in protest to his speed. As soon as he was in earshot, he murmured her name.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, his concern leeching into his voice.
Her pace slowed and she frowned. “Wrong?”
“I just thought . . .” he trailed off as he tried to articulate the concerns that had raced through his mind when he’d seen her. “It’s just that, well, after last night, I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.”
“Why not?” Her expression was enigmatic, making it impossible for Drew to judge the meaning of her words. “Just because you told me you didn’t want to?”
Amity sucked in a comforting breath, preparing to put it all out there. She would either be rewarded or rebuffed—but at least there wouldn’t be any lies and Drew would know everything.
“I don’t think that’s enough to keep me away,” she admitted.
“What do you mean?”
She stepped closer to him, so close she could feel the warmth radiating from his body. With her heart beating a million miles a minute, she placed her palm over his cheek. “I mean, I want you, Drew. I know it’s wrong and I can’t promise you forever, but I can’t leave things the way they are.”
Drew lifted his hand and placed it over hers. He closed his eyes and exhaled a shaky breath.
Because of the connection between them, she knew exactly how he was feeling. Without words, he affirmed everything she felt—everything she’d hoped that he felt.
“What are you doing here?” she asked.
“I was trying to do what you wanted me to do: get away. But Napoleon there wouldn’t sell me a ticket.” He swung his hand back in the direction of the clerk, who was gaping openly at the pair.
Amusement danced in Amity’s eyes, but her voice was somber when she spoke. “Can we go somewhere to talk?”
Drew wanted to, so badly, but he didn’t want to open himself up to the heartbreak that he knew was inevitable. “I’m not sure there is much more to say.”
“Please? I have something important to discuss with you.”
Despite clear reluctance, he nodded. Amity followed a few steps behind as he led the way back to his car. The emotional aura emanating from him was almost palpable. Amity wished she could say something to put his mind at ease, but there was no way of telling him what she needed to talk to him about—she had to show him. She only hoped she was doing the right thing.
When they were secluded away in the privacy afforded by the cabin, he rested his head back against the seat. “What was it that you wanted to say?”
“I’m sorry, Drew. This might hurt a little.”
She took one of his hands in hers before pressing her other against his temple and hitting him with the full force of her grace. Then she left Earth behind once more, not allowing any part of herself to stay behind—after all, she didn’t want to be found.
Chapter Eighteen
Drew opened his eyes as the sound of crashing waves replaced the roar that had occupied his mind since the moments after Amity’s apology. He tried to remember what had happened exactly, but he couldn’t. All he could recall was a white light, brighter than anything he’d ever seen in his life, and a roaring sound that had rushed past his ears and overtaken every part of his being. He dropped his hand from Amity’s and took a step back from her.
&n
bsp; “What the Hell?” he cried out in shock. Nothing that he’d ever experienced before had even remotely prepared him for whatever had just happened.
Amity’s eyes danced with amusement. “You’re looking in the wrong direction. There are some advantages to being a Heavenly being. This is one of them, but unfortunately, the trip won’t be as gentle for you.”
“What are you talking about?”
Before he’d even had a chance to fully absorb the fact that he was standing on a golden beach somewhere in the world, only God—and Amity, Drew supposed—knew exactly where, he realized that both his and Amity’s outfits were different than they had been only seconds earlier. Amity was in a white, practically see-through dress that left very little to the imagination. Drew had miraculously changed into a pair of white board shorts and a light-blue collared shirt that was hanging open, exposing his chest and stomach.
After assessing his outfit, all while trying to work out if he had in fact become certifiably insane, he lifted his gaze to the horizon again. Despite the situation he found himself in—not that he knew exactly what that situation was—he had to admire the beauty in his surroundings. As he turned a full circle, he saw a brown wooden shack rising out of a dense forest. It looked almost designed to impede on the view as little as possible.
In both directions, the land curved back on itself almost immediately; the island, or peninsula, they were on must have been rather small. It didn’t escape Drew’s notice that the water surrounding the pristine shoreline was the soft azure blue of Amity’s eyes and the white sand on the beach almost perfectly matched the color of her hair.
“What’s happening?” he asked. “Where are we?”
“You probably don’t want to know the answer to that,” Amity said in an amused tone. When he met her gaze, it was full of something he couldn’t read—fear maybe but that was in such contrast to her tone that he didn’t understand it.
All Amity Allows (Fall for You Book 2) Page 16