“How did we get here?” He found it impossible to wrap his head around the fact that a minute ago, they were in Flint, and now they were somewhere completely different—and in different clothes no less.
“You wanted to get away.”
“To see somewhere new and try to have some fun; not to avoid civilization altogether.”
At his words, Amity’s smile sunk. Despite everything that had happened the previous day, he hated seeing her so crestfallen.
“I mean, it’s beautiful,” he said to backtrack. “It’s just . . . well, where are we?”
Amity laughed, filling the air with the tinkering of bells that had an almost Pavlovian reaction on his cock. He willed away the feeling, knowing he couldn’t have that with her. That was part of the issue they’d found themselves in, wasn’t it?—well, that and the fact that she’d lied to him.
Although hadn’t she said herself that she wanted him? His mind wandered down the dangerous path, remembering her words at the airport. She had something important to tell him, but why did she have to bring him to . . . well, to wherever he was, to tell him?
“I still don’t think you want to know, but we’re together and I can guarantee we won’t be interrupted for at least a week. Surely that’s what matters?”
“Maybe, but—”
She cut him off with a finger pressed against his lips. “Just think about whether the where is really that important. If it is, ask me once again and I’ll tell you. Otherwise, just trust me when I say that I’m sure you’d rather not know.”
The touch of her warm skin against his lips sent a shiver down Drew’s spine. His board shorts did nothing to hide the reaction that her presence caused on his body. Even as the thought struck him, Amity’s gaze trailed down his body and she released a small but wanton sigh when she spotted the prominent bulge.
She dropped her finger away from his mouth. Drew’s heart leapt into his mouth as Amity’s fingertips trailed down his chest and over his stomach until she palmed his cock through the thin material.
His breathing sped and he closed his eyes at the sensation. A needful moan passed his lips even with the warnings Amity had given him ringing in his head. Letting himself fall for her would only end in heartache, but as she made her move, he found himself not caring.
“This week is about wish fulfilment,” she purred as she moved closer to him, close enough that their bodies were touching. “Anything that you want, you can have.”
It was hard to concentrate on the reasons he should argue against what was happening when his entire focus was on the small circles she traced with her fingers.
She stood on tiptoes, leaning against him. It was immediately clear that she had very little—if anything—on underneath her slip of a dress. Through the thin material, her perked nipples rubbed against his chest as she pressed her body against his. Her hand moved from his cock to his back, trapping him in her presence. “Anything that we both want,” she whispered against his cheek with heated breath.
She wrapped her other arm around his neck and touched her lips to his, light little caresses that wiped his ability to think of anything else but her mouth and her touch.
“I want this,” she breathed between soft kisses. “I want you.”
Drew felt an almost palpable relief run through him as she invaded his every sensation and left him with little choice but to accept everything she offered. One arm snaked around her waist, pulling her closer. His other found her hair, his fingers dipping into the silken threads. Nothing existed for him except for the sensation of her body yielding against his own. The power he felt about bringing this heavenly creature to her metaphorical knees just as she’d done to him was as heady a drug as Drew had ever tasted.
Amity’s touch was divine. Her lips tasted like honey, and when her tongue swept forward to brush against his, it was like nothing he’d ever experienced before. Every other kiss, the touch of every other woman he’d ever caressed, faded into the distant past as he reveled in his present with her.
In his future.
The thought was enough to stop him cold.
He had no future with Amity, and he had no right to be dreaming of one. They had nothing beyond this stolen kiss on a secluded beach. Loosely gripping the top of Amity’s arm, he pushed her away. Her face fell and her eyes practically screamed with hurt and rejection as he stepped away from her. Although he longed to wipe the pain away, he only knew one way and he couldn’t do that without risking replacing it with greater agony when things ended.
“What am I doing?” he murmured as he turned away from her.
“You’re letting go,” she replied, placing her hand on his arm. Her look was pleading, imploring him to continue what they’d started moments earlier.
“Letting go of what?”
She brushed her fingers over his forehead, trailing fingertips through his hair. “Of who you used to be. Of the hurt. Of the assumption that you have to be the best of everything in order to have a happy life. Of the fact that you have to have a plan for the future in order to live in the now.”
He breathed out a mirthless chuckle. “Why did you have to be so perfect?”
Moving closer to her again, he pushed his fingers into her hair. The movement wasn’t guided by lust as much as it was by sorrow.
Closing his eyes, he rested his forehead against hers. He didn’t have any words that could fix everything; had none of his usual confidence to deal with the situation laid out in front of him. The truth was he was terrified of letting himself feel anything more for the beguiling angel than he already did. Then again, he wasn’t sure it was possible to feel more for her anyway.
“Why did it have to be like this?”
“I’ve only ever been what you needed me to be.” She ran her hands around his waist. “But then, you impossibly became everything I needed you to be as well. And that’s why I—I made a mistake. A terrible one. I fell for you.”
“Falling for me was a mistake?” He opened his eyes and met her gaze. There was no way he could pretend that the words didn’t sting.
She dropped her eyes to focus on his mouth. Her lip quivered as she spoke. “Yes, it was. What we feel is frowned upon, Drew. If my brothers found out, it wouldn’t work out well for either of us.”
“That’s why you’d have to leave anyway?” Drew asked to clarify her statements from the day before. He wasn’t sure whether he was supposed to feel cheered that she really did love him, or depressed because it meant nothing anyway.
She nodded. “And it’s also why we’re here.”
He tilted his head in confusion.
“Here, we’re somewhat protected from, well, from everyone who would rather us not be together. We’re cloaked from their prying grace—err, eyes.”
“Why? How?”
“Because this place”—she closed her eyes and sighed—“it doesn’t really exist.”
Amity regretted her choice of words as soon as they were free. She hadn’t wanted to explain what she’d had to do to get this slice of privacy for the two of them, at least not this early into their time together. Mostly because she was worried that Drew might be mad enough about what she’d done to get them some space that he’d demand to leave immediately. Although, it was probably only fair that he did know. Better having to return him home straight away than to lead him on and let him think they were somewhere on Earth.
He frowned. “What do you mean?”
“This”—she spread her arms out wide to indicate the small island—“is Heaven.”
Drew laughed. Then he must have realized she was serious.
“What did you do to me?” His frown returned, deeper than before, as he patted his body as if it might have suddenly evaporated without him realizing. “Am I dead?”
She dropped her head to look at the beach beneath her feet. She toed the sand a few times in an attempt to stall. It really shouldn’t have been so hard to angel-up and tell him the truth.
“Amity,” he said, his tone
compelling her to answer.
She took a deep breath before swallowing down her fear to tell him the truth. “No, not dead, but right about now, airport security will be finding you slumped over in your car. In a coma.”
“A coma?” he yelped. “Are you serious?”
She looked at him with pleading eyes, imploring him to understand. A coma really was the lesser of two evils when it came to finding this way to be alone together—if only for a stolen moment. “It was the only way I could get you here, at least without actually killing you.”
His eyes widened with fear. “You put me in a coma?”
“To spend some time with you,” she justified.
“You put me in a coma so we could have a date?” His tone was incredulous.
Dread trickled down her spine. She’d worried that he would take her truth badly. There was no doubt in her mind that he would soon ask to leave and they’d never get this chance again.
“It was the only way,” she cried, clutching at his shirt. “The other angels can’t find me here. They won’t ever know about this, about us. Peter will keep our secret safe.”
“Peter?” He raised an eyebrow. His voice was somewhat calmer—as though he’d moved beyond the anger to a strange acceptance. “Like Saint Peter and the pearly gates?”
“The one and only.”
All thought that he’d found any form of acceptance was wiped away in an instant when Drew’s hand found his hair as he started to hyperventilate. “Are you kidding me? This is all a goddamned joke, right?”
Before she had a chance to respond, he added, “You’re really not joking are you? This is really happening? I’m in Heaven with a fucking angel.”
He laughed hysterically for a moment before his face went slack and his skin paled. Then he started to pace. “Are you allowed to swear here? I mean, I’m not going to be sent straight to Hell just for a fucking swear word, am I?”
“Relax, Drew,” Amity said, moving closer to him and stilling his movements with her calm presence.
He stopped pacing at least, although his crazed gaze indicated he was still far from being relaxed about it all.
She laid her palms on either side of his face, caressing his cheeks and forcing him to look her in the eye. “Just imagine this is all in your head.”
“Is it?” His gaze was steady, unwavering as he asked—no doubt watching for a lie.
Little did he know that Amity couldn’t lie; not here at least. On Earth, she was a bad liar; in Heaven, it was an impossible feat. Her angelic grace, her need for the truth to overpower all, couldn’t be tempered by her human shell when she was in Heaven.
“No,” she admitted. “But it’ll be easier if you think of it that way. What happens here is between you and me. We’re the only ones who will ever know.”
He looked at her and absorbed the calming energy that she tried to fill him with. It wasn’t enough to completely erase the crazed look from his eyes, but it did stop his body from trembling.
“This is so far beyond . . . well, beyond anything,” he said. “How exactly am I supposed to deal with this? And what about my family? Dad must be so worried right now.”
Amity started to doubt herself and her actions anew. She’d just imagined that he might be willing to take her up on her offer, and now it was all lost. Drew’s statement had seemed so final that Amity assumed he was turning her down.
Although she could understand him not wanting to open himself up to more heartbreak, she’d been hoping to take a few precious days of stolen time that she could carry with her for all eternity after she left him to the rest of his life. He was human, and he was healing himself at a rapid rate, so she was almost certain he would find love again. Even though that reality was painful to consider, the fact that he’d eventually find happiness almost made her happy.
“I—I can take you back now, if you want?” She really wanted to have this time with him though. One blissful week, where they could carve out their own little slice of Heaven. She’d imagined the things they could do enough times while hashing out her plan the night before, but in all her planning, she hadn’t really given much thought to the possibility that Drew wouldn’t be interested in exploring the limited time she could offer.
“Yes. No. Just . . . give me a minute to try to process this, please?”
The fact that he didn’t immediately want to leave gave her hope.
“I love you, Drew,” she said as she met his panicked gaze with a steady calm she didn’t really feel. It was time for her to put it all on the line. “It’s not enough. It won’t change anything, but it’s the truth.”
He placed his fingers under her chin, guiding her face up to his. “I love you, too, Amity.”
The words were everything she already knew, but she was relieved to hear them anyway.
“But this—us—it won’t last, will it?”
She shook her head before resting her face against his chest. “It can’t.”
A sorrowful sigh issued from him.
“All I can offer you is one week,” she said, stepping back a little to trace her fingertips over his jaw. “One week of pure, unadulterated pleasure, but that’s it. And I’m sorry about that. I’m sorry I’m too selfish to give you up without hurting you more first. I just couldn’t walk away without asking for this first.”
“And what if I don’t want to let you go?”
“You and I both know you’ll have to. Neither of us have a choice in that.”
“This is so fucking stupid,” he growled before he captured her hand in his own and pressed her palm against his lips.
“I’m sorry.”
“Me too.”
A moment passed as the two of them stared into one another’s eyes. Drew’s lips pressed against her palm once more before he spoke again.
“I could just stay here forever.” There wasn’t a trace of doubt or insincerity in his voice when he said it.
She could barely believe what she was hearing, barely allowed the hope to swell in her chest. “You’d do that? For me?”
She’d never allow him to, but the fact he was willing to throw away everything he had for her was more than she ever could have expected. It meant more than she anticipated.
Pacing away from her, he ran his fingers through his hair. “The last couple of weeks . . . they’ve changed me. I don’t know yet if it’s for the better, but I do know that I’m not willing to turn my back on those changes and blindly walk back into my old life, my old habits. I want to stay. With you.”
He turned back to her, his gaze flashing with his obviously scattered thoughts. His eyes were wide and wild, and she realized that all of her plans had been so selfish. She needed to put her own needs aside, and do what he needed for a while.
“Even if it was possible, I couldn’t let you do that. You have family. You have your patients. You can’t willingly walk away from all of that for me. I know you wouldn’t really want to—and it’s not a choice you can just take back if you change your mind.”
The reality of what staying there with Amity would actually entail must have registered with Drew and he frowned. “How long can I stay with you for? I mean, and still be, you know . . . alive?”
“You’re the doctor. You tell me.”
“I don’t know what my body is doing down there?” The last two words were uttered with such clear confusion that she wondered once again whether her plan was a bad idea. “Or what is happening to it. Me. Him?”
“Your body will continue to do everything it needs to in order to survive, at least. I think it will.”
“You think?”
She shrugged. “I’m sorry. I’ve never done this before, but I had to. I had to take the risk, do you understand?”
“Shouldn’t I have had a say? Especially if you only think you know that I’ll be okay.”
“Yes. You should have. I’m sorry.” Her lip quivered as tears pricked her eyes. She dropped her head to look at the sand again. There was no way she could look at
Drew without tears.
“If I—um, it?” He shook his head. “If everything responds the way that it should, I—shit, what am I even saying? This is crazy!”
He buried his head in his hands. When he lifted it again, he met her eyes.
“But it would be crazier not to enjoy a few stolen moments with you,” he murmured.
Without pausing, he covered the two strides that separated them and pulled her into his arms. Despite her surprise at his fast action, Amity wrapped her arms around his neck and surrendered herself to his embrace as his lips caressed hers.
It was more than she could have hoped for after his minor freak-out over her actions, and she wanted to tell him that much. “Drew, I—”
He silenced her protest with another kiss. “I don’t want to have to say goodbye, but if I’ll have to eventually, I want to enjoy every minute I have with you until then.”
Chapter Nineteen
Taking Amity’s soft gasp at his words as permission, Drew swept her into his arms, lifting her up to carry her across the sand and into the private bungalow at the edge of the beach.
Amity giggled in his arms, and the sound made him practically sprint to the front door. By the time he arrived, he saw it wasn’t actually a solid door at all, but a series of strings of shells screening the inside from the outside. For half a second, he was confused by the lack of security in the way of a lockable entrance, but then he remembered Amity’s words to consider the whole place as being in his head. There was no need for locks there because there was nothing to lock out.
Besides, he reasoned from some place deep inside that accepted the whole mess a little too easily, there are no burglars in Heaven. At least, none who didn’t repent.
He carried Amity through the doorway, the rounded shells rolling over their bodies in a clatter of noise. When he reached the inside, he didn’t pause to investigate the decor. Instead, he pressed on, moving toward the doorway he could see at the far side of the space—the one that housed a giant four-pillar bed with gossamer curtains.
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