Acts of God
Page 41
Decker continued his explanation, describing a beauty, an awakeness, an awareness so acute that it is impossible to describe it in words used on this side of the event. But well it is, for were it to be described here, all who read it and are bound for it would die from longing. And yet I will here attempt in these earthly words to express what I can of it, and do so without fear of causing any harm but that sweet stab of pain and longing which C.S. Lewis described as 'Joy,' which was so cheaply forsaken for the satisfaction of Eve's desire to know good and evil and Adam's desire for his wife.
C.S. Lewis is said to have called it 'real life,' something which has not yet begun for anyone now 'living' as we know it. The gurus and eastern mystics call it 'unity consciousness.' It is a clearheadedness, a 'higher level of consciousness' — though that terminology is so often misused — that makes what is called 'normal life' and 'normal experience' seem like nothing more than a drunken stupor. It is a consciousness that the gurus and yogis have only dreamed of, though they and we instinctively know is there, but which always — save for fleeting moments, and then only in clouded pastel hues — exists just beyond our human reach. It is, as best it can be described here, truly being a part of nature, in 'tune' with all creation, synchronized with the mind of God. And it is only for the lack of this faculty that things imaginary such as novels can seem to take on life. For who, having experienced a single moment of real life could ever have conceived to question one's own existence or could have been forced to rely on the logic of 'I think, therefore I am' to be certain of it.
"Real life has just begun, Decker," said Elizabeth, who was familiar both with C.S. Lewis' writings and, in this Kingdom, with Lewis personally. "The rest seems like a dream, an illusion, a nightmare. Most of the things that Christopher promised were merely the things mankind gave away when he fell in Eden," she continued. "In a real sense, Adam and Eve did die on that day they ate the fruit; and all of us with them. It is only in our new lives that we can begin to see just how real that death was."
Decker nodded his understanding and complete agreement. "When will I be able to see Jesus again?" he asked. "There is so much I want to tell him; so much I want to ask him."
"Decker, just a few minutes ago he told you that he is always with you," Elizabeth answered. "He meant it. He is with you even now. You can tell him whatever is on your mind. Ask him anything and he will answer. Before the words have fully formed in your mind, he will answer."
"That must be how Joshua Rosen knew about my dream, and what Scott meant when he said that the Ark of the Covenant was no longer necessary because the evidence of God's covenant is within us and all around us."
"Ask him yourself," Elizabeth urged.
Decker considered the suggestion for a second and then began to compose the question. No sooner had he done so than the answer became clear, and he also understood that the rock upon which he had sat after his resurrection but which he did not recall seeing a moment before, had been provided in response to his wife's unspoken prayer.
Decker sighed and bit his lip as he looked into the loving eyes of his wife, overcome with all that he had been given. To him it seemed that it had been less than an hour since he stood in Christopher's office, faced with the fact that his life was a waste and his sins were comparable to those of Hitler and Stalin. God's forgiveness overwhelmed him. Decker took his wife in his arms and held her. Neither spoke for several minutes but both of them understood.
"Scott said the river flows into the Dead Sea," Decker said finally.
"Yes, but you'd hardly call it 'dead' anymore," Elizabeth answered. "Because of the river, the sea has been made alive. It's teeming with fish and water fowl. Would you like to go there to see it?"
"I'd like that," he said, "but let's just walk for a while."
Elizabeth smiled and the two headed off in the direction of the sea. As they walked together beside the gently flowing river, the sounds of songbirds filled the softly floral-scented air. Without speaking, Elizabeth reached down and slipped her small hand into his. Decker closed his fingers around her hand and held it tenderly as he took a deep breath and drank in all that was around him.
Once again, Decker had managed to be in the right place at the right time. He was home.
THE END