Another Angel of Love

by Henry K. Ripplinger

  “Oh Jenny,” her voice quavered, “I ran away from my mother at the airport and took a taxi here. I don’t have enough money to pay the driver. Have you got fifteen dollars?”

  Ted motioned Tammy inside, pulling his wallet from his back pocket. “Come in, Tammy. I’ll deal with the taxi.”

  He slid outside past Jenny, who was already hugging her best friend. Edith stood in the foyer, not knowing what to do.

  Tammy looked at Jenny’s mom, “Oh, Mrs. Sarsky! Could I please stay here with Jenny tonight?”

  Jenny turned to her mother as well, willing her to be compassionate.

  “Yes, I suppose so. Where did you say your mother was? I’ll have to phone her.”

  “I left her at the airport. She might have taken a cab home or waited for Dad to pick her up. She’s probably already guessed I would come here.”

  “Well, go upstairs with Jenny and we’ll wait for her to call. If we don’t hear from her, I’ll call your house in a half-hour or so.”

  “Thank you so much, Mrs. Sarsky.”

  Jenny put an arm around her friend and led her upstairs.

  Hearing “True love” stirred such strong memories of Jenny, Henry had to excuse himself. Mary was still holding his apple pie, trying to figure out why her son hadn’t taken the dessert.

  “Thanks anyway, Mom. I’ll have it later.”

  Henry said good night to his parents and Mr. Engelmann, and went to his room. He sat at his desk and relived one memory after another. The movie, the walk home, holding hands—and then Eddy’s friends attacking them.

  Henry did his best to pull his mind away from that awful scene. He was becoming good friends with Eddy and didn’t want to go back to being mad at him, though he often still wondered what exactly had happened that night after Eddy’s friends had taken Jenny to the park.

  Soon he would know.

  He opened the bottom drawer of his desk and glanced in. He almost had enough saved to carry out his plan. If only he could get Jenny’s phone number or home address. He had Mr. Sarsky’s work address and phone number. And he had a list of all the high schools in Ottawa and their phone numbers. He’d tried phoning a couple of the them but both had declined to either call a Jenny Sarsky to the phone or give out any home phone numbers. He tried to think of a way he might trick the school secretaries into giving out the information. If only he could create some emergency or other, but hadn’t figured that part out yet.

  He would, though.

  He closed that drawer and opened the one second from the top, taking out the notes Jenny had left for him on the gatepost when she lived three doors down. He recalled the first time she’d put a note there. She’d done it to appease him for not being able to see him that night. He wished now that he’d never agreed to see her only every other evening. Her parents had been terribly concerned by how much they were seeing of each other. It hadn’t made any difference to their feelings anyway, and the thought that he’d missed out on even a second of being with the love of his life saddened him to the soul. He began to read the notes, hoping Jenny’s words of love would fill the void in his heart.

  As soon as Jenny closed the door to her room she grabbed Tammy’s hands and squeezed them. “Oh Tammy! You don’t know how relieved I am to see you! What happened at the airport?” Jenny led her friend to sit on the edge of her bed.

  “The look on my mom’s face when I told her I just couldn’t have the abortion is still stamped in my mind. I thought for sure her chin would hit the floor when I ran off,” Tammy giggled a bit hysterically, but Jenny knew her friend didn’t think it was the least bit funny and the choking laughter reverted to tears almost immediately.

  Jenny inched closer and once again took Tammy’s hands in her own, waiting until her friend’s sobs subsided. When she finally looked up, Jenny saw that Tammy’s brown eyes didn’t have the lost, forlorn look they’d had the other day. They seemed clear, despite the tears. More settled.

  “I’m so happy about your decision—but can I ask, what changed your mind?”

  “The thought of the baby being scraped out of my womb and thrown away seemed so awful and—and…cruel. My mom kept telling me that it isn’t anything yet, that it’s a fetus just beginning to form and that I shouldn’t call it a baby. But I told her it was and even she called it a baby in many of our discussions. But what you said to me the other day really hit home and I told Mom too. That the moment the baby is conceived it has a spirit, a soul and a guardian angel flies to its side. She said that was all nonsense but I know you’re right. When any life begins it has a life force—how can it not? And an unborn baby has a soul right away. It doesn’t get it after a month or three months or nine. It’s a living spirit at its creation!”

  After a brief moment Tammy added, “I hope it’s okay. I told Mom about your baby and that you would never have an abortion and how much you miss your little girl, that you gave her up for adoption.”

  “Sure, that’s fine, Tammy. I just hope it helps her understand.” Jenny gazed at her friend with compassion. Tammy was being bombarded by every emotion there was and had still been able to make what Jenny knew was the best choice. Inwardly, she thanked Tammy’s guardian angel for giving her insight.

  “Was Robbie at the airport with you?”

  “No, he came over to our house earlier today and we talked for a bit. He was glad I’d decided to have the abortion. I don’t know what’ll happen when he finds out I changed my mind.”

  That’s the difference between James and Henry, Jenny thought. James would probably react like Robbie, but she knew Henry wouldn’t. He’d be there for her, he’d never want her to destroy something they’d created together. The lyrics of “True Love” came back to her…Oh where are you, Henry? Why haven’t you written? I just know something must have happened, but what?

  She brought her attention back to her friend. “Tammy, I just want you to know that I’ll always be here for you.”

  “I wish Robbie felt that way too. It would have been nice for him to come to the airport. The way he talks sometimes, I feel like he just used me. Do you and James do it, Jen?”

  “James wants to all the time, but…”

  “But you refuse, right? Oh Jenny, you’re so perfect, always knowing what’s best.”

  Jenny’s grip on Tammy’s hand tightened. “No, Tammy, I don’t! When I was with Henry I wanted to, but he was the one who stopped at the last minute. He knew it was best to wait until we got married. At the time I fully believed that we would but then I left. Still, I hoped that someday we would get married…but he hasn’t answered any of my letters so I guess his gallantry was all for nothing. But I have to say, too, that I understand completely why it’s so important to wait to have sex until you’re in a secure relationship and committed to each other.”

  “Yeah, look what’s happened to me.”

  “Well, it happened to me too, Tammy. But there’s so much more when you think about it. When you give yourself to each other, it’s a precious gift, especially on your wedding night. And I know that if I give in to James it’s all he’ll want to do.”

  “That’s what happened with Robbie and me. I didn’t want to for the longest time, but he kept insisting that he loved me and I was afraid of losing him. I know lots of the girls do it, so I gave in too. I do love him, but once we started that’s all Robbie wanted to do. He was forever taking me somewhere private in his car or to his place when his parents weren’t home.”

  Tammy looked down, “I just knew this would happen. So many times I wanted to stop, but Robbie never would. I guess he never really listened to my wishes or concerns. He just wanted what he wanted.”

  “Don’t worry, Tammy. I’m living proof that it’s not the end of the world. And I’ll be with you all the way.”

  “The baby’s going to show soon, Jenny. I’ll be so embarrassed and there’ll be so much gossip and I know Robbie will j
ust hate it. He probably won’t have anything to do with me anymore.”

  “If that happens, Tammy, it’s good for you to know now what the future with him might have held. If he won’t support you now…”

  “I’m so scared, Jenny, and confused by it all.”

  “I know. I felt the same when I was pregnant and I wanted Henry to be there. But he wasn’t.” Tears surfaced in Jenny’s eyes.

  “Are you sorry you gave your baby up?”

  “Lots of the time I am, but I know I was too young and I know it was for the best. But I do miss my little girl so much and at times I think my heart will break. If only the rules weren’t so strict and I could visit her…but then I guess they know what’s best and maybe it would be too confusing for the child.”

  Jenny was quiet for a moment. “I’ve thought about it a lot, and even though I wish differently at times, I still think it was the best option. I talked to my social worker about it and she thinks it’s best too. And if you want, I’m sure she’d be more than willing to talk to you too, Tammy.”

  Tammy nodded and then asked, “If you had to do it all over again would you give your baby up? You know, if you were my age?”

  Jenny shrugged. “It’s not important what I think, Tammy, it’s what you really want in your heart that matters. If you’ve really decided to keep the baby and give birth to it, I think that’s the best decision. You’re carrying a precious human life and there are so many people out there who can’t have children. And between now and when the baby is born, you’ll have time to think about what’s best for you. And whatever you decide, I’ll be there for you through thick and thin. If you decide to keep the baby, I’ll help you raise him or her. I’ll do everything I can to help you.”

  Just then the phone rang.

  “That must be Mom!” Tammy exclaimed. “I don’t want to talk to her—I just can’t!”

  “I’m sure my mom will explain things. She’s good at smoothing things over.”

  Ever so quietly Jenny picked up the extension and listened in, looking at Tammy and putting a finger to her lips.

  “Oh, it’s no trouble at all, Mrs. Anderson. She and Jenny are in Jenny’s room and may even be sleeping already, they both were so tired … Yes, Jenny will drive her home tomo—”

  Jenny hung up the phone and smiled at her friend. “It’s okay. It was your mom and it sounded like she said you could stay. My mom told her I’d drive you home tomorrow.”

  “Oh, that’s good! I just can’t go home right now. Mom’ll be so mad at me.”

  “You know, it might seem that way, but then again she just might not be. I was surprised by how my parents supported me.”

  Jenny paused, watching her friend stifle a yawn. It had been a trying day.

  “If you like, I’ll get you one of my nightgowns and there are new toothbrushes in the guest room. Do want to sleep there tonight?”

  “I’d rather be here with you, if that’s all right.”

  “Sure. Why don’t you go get changed and I’ll do the same.”

  Both girls stood up and Tammy gave her a quick hug.

  “You’re such a good friend, Jenny. I don’t know what I would do without you.”

  Alone in his room, Henry turned out the light. He went over to the window and gazed up at the moon. Just below it was the brightest star in the sky, the star of the east. He could feel Jenny’s love and he sent his out in return.

  Jenny held her friend close as they lay together in the single bed. Tammy didn’t speak for the longest time, but Jenny knew she wasn’t sleeping. She could feel Tammy’s tears through the thin cotton of her nightgown and silently handed her friend a tissue.

  Tammy wiped a tear from her cheek. Softly she whispered, “Last night, alone in our backyard and thinking of Robbie and what to do, I saw a dazzling shooting star streak across the sky. I once heard that if you make a wish right away the dust of the star’s sparkle will settle in your heart and your wish will come true.”

  Jenny smiled at the thought. “Did you make a wish, Tammy?”

  “Oh yes, that very instant. I wished with all my heart that Robbie would come back to me and that we would be married. I just know it’ll come true.”

  “Oh, I don’t doubt it, Tammy, not for one minute. Each star has an angel guarding it. Maybe the angel was telling you to believe in what you hope for.”

  “That’s a beautiful way to look at it, Jenny.”

  “You know, the first bright star that appears in the eastern sky, that was our star, Henry’s and mine. I still believe it. Sometimes it’s as if I can feel it’s angel sending Henry’s love to me.”

  “Wow, Jenny, you sure must have loved him.”

  Jenny was quiet. Here she was, going steady with James and talking mostly about Henry. Tammy’s next question went right to the heart of what she was feeling.

  “Is there a wish you’d like to make, Jenny?”

  Jenny took a deep breath, then told her best friend her heart’s deepest desire. “I pray to my guardian angel about it all the time. What I wish for is to look into Henry’s green eyes and kiss his warm, tender lips.”

  “You’d better not let James hear you say that.”

  Jenny chuckled, “For sure not. It’s just that on the night we left Regina to come here, Henry came to see me off. I rushed to him to kiss him and look into his eyes one last time, and just as we were about to, my mother dragged me off to the car…you have no idea, Tammy, how I long for that last kiss.”

  “Well, keep your eyes open for a shooting star then, Jen.”

  Then all was quiet but for Tammy’s soft sobs.

  Jenny had forgotten to pull down the blind and the bright, full moon shone in through the window, the spark that was the star of the east not far below it. As always, she felt the rays of light enter her room and then her heart.

  In her mind’s eye, Jenny could see her and Tammy under the light of the heavens, each thinking of her baby and her first love, their feelings made clear by the sheen of the tears streaming down their soft, luminous cheeks.

  Quietly Jenny hummed…

  While I give to you and you give to me

  true love, true love

  so on and on it will always be

  true love, true love.

  For you and I have a guardian angel…

  “Oh Jenny, you have the heart of an angel,” Tammy murmured as they both finally drifted off into sleep, exhausted.

  Chapter Nineteen

  As Henry made his way down the hallway, he saw his buddy Travis coming up the stairs. Ever since the start of Grade 11 last year, they’d hit it off.

  Henry still hung out with Timmy Linder occasionally, but they had sort of drifted apart, due in part because Henry had to rush home every day to work for Mr. Engelmann but also because they’d developed different interests and no longer had much in common.

  Travis was a lot of fun and was in all of Henry’s classes. He was one of those students who never seemed to study, yet earned straight A’s. He was interested in art, didn’t care much for sports and worked part-time at a shoe store downtown. The big difference between Travis and Henry was that Travis was girl crazy. Walking down the hall with Travis was like walking with a big dog in heat. Unfortunately, Henry didn’t have much of a leash on him and at times Travis could be very embarrassing.

  They landed at their lockers at the same time.

  “Hey, Hank,” Travis said. “Who ya taking to the Halloween dance?”

  “Uh, I’m probably not going to go, Travis.”

  It’s not like there was a shortage of girls interested in him. Girls were always flirting with him as they passed in the hallway. But Henry had decided a long time ago that Jenny was the one and only girl in his life. Someday they would be together again. And even if he wanted to find someone else, his schedule simply didn’t allow it.

 
; “Listen, Hank,” Travis said, “I can get my dad’s car for the dance, and my date has a friend who’d really like to go. Why don’t you go out on a blind date with us? Julean promised me her friend is really nice, and very attractive.”

  “Oh, I don’t know…”

  “Look, all work and no play makes Hank a dull boy. Come on, it’ll be fun. You never take the time for any enjoyment.”

  It was true. All he did was work, but he wasn’t sure about going out with someone he’d never even met. “I’ve heard some pretty gruesome stories about blind dates,” he said now.

  “Aw, Julean wouldn’t mess around like that. She said to say you’ll be sure to like her friend. I won’t take no for an answer.”

  “Well…okay,” Henry agreed.

  “Great! Lookin’ forward to it.” Travis nearly burst with excitement and smacked Henry on the shoulder, knocking him off balance.

  “What are you going to wear? I mean, dress up like?”

  “Oh right. Halloween dance. Geez, I don’t know.”

  “Don’t worry about it. It’s still three weeks away. You’ll come up with something.”

  The thought of having to dress up in some goofy costume for some date with some girl he didn’t know sent shivers up and down his spine. Now he was spooked. He already regretted agreeing to go.

  On the morning of the meeting at the lawyer’s office, David Engelmann paced in front of the door, waiting for the car Mr. Balfour’s secretary had said would pick him up. He had entrusted his entire future to a man he’d never met, one who had asked him to just “leave it all to me.” He had no idea what he was supposed to say or do or might be expected to sign. Just trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding. The scripture came into his mind at that moment and he found it soothing.

  “Is everything okay?” Mary asked as she straightened the magazines beside him.

  “Yes, yes, everything is fine. I just don’t know what kind of day the Lord has prepared for me.”