Outremer I

by D. N. Carter

  “What is it, Paul?” Philip asked, concerned, seeing the look upon Paul’s face.

  “It’s, erm…it’s er…well, Raja became very ill, but do not worry, she is much better now as Firgany sought medicines from his contacts. Said you would know who. But they were attacked in the hills,” Paul said, his voice shaking with emotion.

  Philip sat bolt upright fast, alarmed, as Sister Lucy placed her hand upon his.

  “What do you mean, attacked?” Philip demanded to know.

  “Hang on…er, it says they went into the hills, got ambushed by bandits, were threatened, the Nicholas man, the young Templar, was shot by a crossbow saving Alisha….er…and…but he is okay now and that Firgany and Taqi went on to Mawsil alone leaving Alisha and Raja at Castle Blanc. Says you would know why! Says it was horrible seeing men killed…and… and,” Paul read, but the emotion welling inside was making him look like he would cry. He looked up at his father and shook his head nervously.

  Philip stood up and moved to stand beside Paul. He took the letter from him and read over it as Paul sat shocked.

  “At least they are all well and okay now,” Philip said reassuringly.

  “’Tis not good enough, Father! I should have been with them, not stuck here learning things that will probably never help us,” Paul said, his voice raised as he stood up fast.

  “Paul…,” Sister Lucy said quietly, just looking up at him.

  Paul barged past his father, clearly upset. The thought that Alisha could have been harmed hit him like a hammer blow to the chest. His frustration and concern were clear to see.

  “Paul…before you go. Here…you missed this smaller sheet at the back, sealed and marked just for your attention,” Philip said and waved a smaller sealed note. Quickly Paul leaned back and grabbed it, turned and rushed up the stairs. Philip and Sister Lucy both sighed at his anguish.

  Paul slammed the bedroom door behind him and sat down on the chair near his window next to his small desk. He pulled the dark curtains open to let the light stream in. He looked at the small note hesitantly. A thousand thoughts ran through his head. Why had Alisha sent him a sealed envelope note? Was she saying she no longer felt the same way for him as she had now met this Nicholas? He felt sick in the pit of his stomach. He was not exactly sure why he felt that way. Was it the fact that she had so nearly been killed, the fact that she had mentioned another man. He was envious of the fact that this man unknown to him had saved her life and she would now be forever indebted to him, but he clenched his fists tightly knowing that it was wrong to feel that way. He should be grateful he had saved her. His mind raced. These letters were weeks old; was she still okay? Reluctantly he broke the wax seal on the smaller letter and opened it. Nervously and with his hands shaking, which he tried to convince himself was down to the fever he was still getting over, he began to read Alisha’s words.

  In the letter she explained the terror she had felt when held by the sailor, how she had forgotten all about the dagger in her waistband but vowed she never would again, how her father had acted so calmly, as had Taqi. She explained how Nicholas had dived in front of the crossbow taking the bolt. A tear fell from his eye as he read this. He felt so far away and helpless. Alisha continued to explain how Nicholas was recovering, was a Knight Templar himself, how beautiful the countryside was around Castle Blanc and how much she missed him. She then stated she did not need to repeat how she felt as she had already done so in the note she had left in his drawer the day she had left, but that she felt it even more so now. Confused, Paul read the last sentence again. ‘What note?’ he asked himself then looked up. Suddenly the realisation dawned upon him that she must have left a message in his work studio drawer.

  He practically flew out of the room and down the stairs, Philip and Sister Lucy looking up from their seated positions as they saw him rush down the stairs and out of sight.

  He almost pulled the large drawer of his desk off of its mountings he opened it so fast, and rapidly removed parchment sheets and maps. Within moments the drawer was empty. In frustration he looked inside the drawer, ran his hands all the way to the back and then started throwing the maps and parchments aside on the desk top. Suddenly he saw it. Just a small folded sheet of parchment tucked between two maps. He grabbed it, held it tight then slowly unfolded the velum parchment and began to read it.

  ‘My dearest Paul,

  By now you will know that we have left. My heart is breaking and physically hurts at not being able to see you and be able to say goodbye until we meet again. I know not how long the time will be until I again can look upon you. I cry already as I write this in your language. I shall pray every day and every night before I close my eyes to sleep, to speed away the days so I can see you again. I have let my feelings loose and I can never put them back. My heart and my soul always have been, and shall remain so, ever yours. I love you with all that I am or ever will be. In my head and heart, I am yours and you are mine already and I need no legal papers or ceremonies to confirm that. I pray you too feel the same way. When I again see you, I shall never let you part from my side again. Will never again say goodbye, for goodbye is for a funeral only, and even then, I would see you in the next life. You are my life. I love you more than life. These are not the words of a childish whim or fantasy. They are truth manifest in all that I find wondrous and beautiful in this world. Love me as I love you and we will never fail in anything we choose to do. You are mine and I am yours. I have splashed some of my favourite perfume on this so that whenever you smell it, you will remember me. Learn your Arabic calligraphy so you may finish my poem in my written language and learn what this symbol means. Until we meet again, eternally yours. Ali x x x’

  Fig 3:

  Paul read her words and his heart felt like it missed several beats. How had he missed this note for so long? he asked himself. He smelt the letter and the perfume where she had splashed droplets of it upon the velum. He smiled as his father and Sister Lucy entered the room looking concerned. Paul looked pale and was sweating heavily. Sister Lucy approached and placed her hand upon his chest and could feel his heart pounding.

  “You must rest, Paul,” she ordered and then put her hand upon his forehead. “Your fever still burns within you,” she stated and looked at Philip.

  “Father, Sister Lucy, worry not for I am much better this moment… very much improved,” Paul said, smiling broadly then looking back at the letter.

  “Be that so, you must still rest lest you lapse…and tomorrow we shall have Niccolas check you over once more,” Philip said, expressing his concern by the look upon his face.

  Paul was clearly happy. He raised the letter, showing his father.

  “I shall away to my room go and rest, Father…Sister Lucy,” Paul remarked as he hurriedly walked past them still smiling broadly. Sister Lucy and Philip looked at each other bemused.

  Paul spent the remainder of the day lying upon his bed holding the letters and note from Alisha reading and the re-reading them over and over again. His spirits felt lifted, any possible thoughts that he and Alisha would never be allowed to further their desires and relationship totally pushed out of his mind. But his fever did break that evening and he had his first full night’s restful sleep since Alisha had left.

  It was only in the morning that he even considered how his father must have been feeling. Raja had been unwell, was still possibly unwell and Paul had not shown the slightest concern for his father’s feelings. He washed and dressed himself feeling somewhat guilty at his total lack of thought and selfish behaviour. He looked out of the window as a slight sea mist was rolling ashore and just in time to see his father climb up upon a cart, the miserable non talking Templar sergeant again at the reins. Quickly Paul ran down the stairs to catch them but as he opened the door and ran out on to the track barefoot, they had already pulled away, disappearing into the thickening mist. He wondered where he could be off to so early. He had not mentioned he was going anywhere. He felt a pang of guilt tug at his heart. Never min
d, he would speak with him later about Raja and apologise then for his lack of concern or interest.

  Paul made his way back into the house and for the kitchen pantry feeling hungry for the first time in many days. As he looked through the cold storage pantry he jumped with fright as Niccolas tapped him upon the shoulder.

  “God help me! Are you trying to kill me with shock?” Paul asked as he turned to look at Niccolas. “And you have missed father as he has gone.”

  “It is you I have come to see. I have already spoken with your father. You wished to learn about the apple and rose symbolism…well, your father thinks that perhaps now is the right time you start to learn about it. So I shall see you at my study library midday. And do not be late,” Niccolas exclaimed and waved a finger at him as he headed for the back door.

  “But…but! Okay, I shall be there…but where has my father gone this early hour?” Paul asked as he picked up some cheese.

  “Oh, Rochefort…to check upon this Rick chap you say you met,” Niccolas replied as he vanished out the doorway.

  “What?” Paul asked and raised a finger questioningly, but Niccolas was already out of sight. Paul paused for a moment, thinking. He shrugged his shoulders and then looked for some milk.

  PART II

  Chapter 7

  Of Vines, Apples and Roses!

  La Rochelle, Chapel of Sainte-Marie, summer of 1178

  Paul followed Niccolas down the ever increasingly wide spiral staircase, doing the same ritual and procedure as always of lighting the small candles in the recesses as they descended slowly into his library. Within moments they were both sat at what had become their usual places opposite each other over the stone table. Niccolas lit his lanthorns, filling the room with a warm light that lent itself to a sense of security and comfort. A perfect environment for study Niccolas would often tell him.

  “Now, young Paul, today we shall start on your education of all things related to the apple and rose symbolism. Your father has given me permission to explain and divulge certain aspects,” Niccolas started to explain.

  “Why only certain aspects?” Paul immediately asked.

  “Paul…you must first learn the basics to build a firm foundation of knowledge. Once you have done this, we can then build upon it with further knowledge. In time, that will in turn teach you wisdom. Besides, your father is still very reluctant to divulge certain aspects of your family name and history for the moment,” Niccolas explained and placed two apples upon a wooden chopping board.

  “Why, what is so important or secret about our family name and history?” Paul asked.

  “Because it is dangerous for you to know,” Niccolas shot back with a serious look upon his face as he sliced one of the apples in half vertically. “So tell me what you think you know about your family,” he asked as he then sliced the other apple in half, but this time horizontally.

  “Erm…I do not know much at all. Only snippets and parts I have overheard Father speak of,” Paul answered awkwardly.

  “Such as?”

  “I don’t know…erm…well for a start I know I was born in England, that my mother is buried there. That my father changed our surname to Plantavalu, but I have no idea of what it was prior to that. I also know that father had new birth certificates and deeds redrawn up…but that is all I know,” Paul answered.

  “And why is it so important you know all the details of your family history and connections to the rose and apple symbols?” Niccolas asked, partly squinting his eyes interrogatively.

  1 – 15

  “I do not know why exactly. But is it not right to know where you come from, who you really are, to know that we are good people and that we are not hiding or running away from some wrong doing or evil deed our family has committed, for why else change and hide the past?” Paul replied questioningly.

  “Good point. Perhaps we should let your father know this is what you think. But I can tell you it is no evil thing or wrong doing your family is a party to, that I can promise you.”

  “Then what is it? Please, Niccolas, if you know but anything on these matters pray tell inform me. I swear it I shall not repeat what I learn,” Paul almost pleaded.

  “Of that I have no doubt nor concern…but I am concerned of what knowing the truth would do to you,” Niccolas replied.

  “Then try me. Please, I beg of you.”

  Niccolas paused as he pondered Paul’s plea.

  “I shall let you know then…but only in small stages…not all at once. Is that agreed? That is my final offer on this matter,” he stated looking at Paul directly in the eye.

  “Why not all now? Surely it cannot be that bad?” Paul asked.

  “Not bad at all…but lengthy and potentially very confusing and unsettling. If you can accept what I explain in stages, you will be open and able to accept what is imparted. Now do we have an understanding and agreement or not…or do we return to our calligraphy lessons instead?” Niccolas asked, his tone serious and clipped.

  “Okay…I agree. Please,” Paul finally answered after a lengthy pause for thought.

  “Good…in that case we shall start with some simple facts about our humble apple here,” Niccolas said and pointed to the cut pieces of apple. “Notice the apple I cut vertically from the stalk down, it shows just two sections of the seed pockets inside, and also that the apple grows outwards in a sort of half circle,” he pointed out as Paul nodded. “Now look at the apple I cut horizontally. Notice immediately the five pointed star shape that is revealed, well the five pointed star symbol is very very ancient indeed. Look, here is a drawing of that shape,” Niccolas said as he laid out in front of him a small parchment with a diagram upon it. Paul pulled it close to study. “Remember what I explained about the symbol for God being a circle with a dot at the centre?”

  “Of course I do.”

  “Good, because from that, we can take our simple circle and place inside it the five pointed star as there. We can draw this by using more circles to create the pattern. We simply intersect seven circles through the centre dot to form what is known as the ‘Circle of Life’.

  Fig 4:

  Look,” Niccolas explained as he placed another drawing in front of him. “You will learn the importance and significance of the sacred value of seven in good time. But you can see the five pointed star shape immediately. But now if I overlap another seven identical patterns again, we can make a ‘Flower of Life’ in which the centre of each circle is on the circumference of up to six surrounding circles of the same diameter; it can also then illustrate the ‘Egg of Life’” and he placed another drawing in front of him.

  Fig 5:

  “Now, Paul, this shape and form are the building blocks of life, this is the sacred geometry of us, and the universe. The ‘Flower of Life’ has provided what is considered to be deep spiritual meaning and forms of enlightenment to those who have studied it as sacred geometry. Believe it or not, even our good friends the Templars derive their symbols and cross from this just as the Jews obtained their Star of David,” Niccolas continued to explain as Paul looked carefully at the drawings. “The Flower of Life symbol has represented important meanings to many throughout history. It can be found in manuscripts, temples and art, especially Arabic as you have been learning, and throughout cultures around the known world. The most common form of the Flower of Life is a hexagonal pattern; that is where the centre of each circle is on the circumference of six surrounding circles of the same diameter, made up of nineteen complete circles and thirty-six partial circular arcs, enclosed by a large circle. Components of the Flower of Life have been a part of the work of alchemists for centuries. Even the ‘Metatron’s Cube’, which I shall cover later, is a symbol derived from the Flower of Life which was used as a containment circle or creation circle, of which you already know,” Niccolas explained and then placed a more detailed and complex drawing of the Flower of Life in front of him. “This looks complex but is very easy to draw up. You will be practising this until you see it in your sleep,
” he said smiling at Paul.

  Fig 6:

  “Now this may look even more daunting, but trust me when I say it gets easier the more you understand it. From our Flower of Life we can make further symbols like these,” Niccolas explained and placed yet another set of drawings in front of him.

  Fig 7:

  “We can now make our Fruit of Life, which, as we know is represented by the apple itself as stated within many religions and is symbolic for knowledge. It is why it was used so graphically within the biblical account of Eve tempting Adam with the forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden. We can also make the Seed of Life as it is formed from seven circles being placed with six-fold symmetry, forming a pattern of circles which acts as a basic component of the Flower of Life’s design. According to some, the Seed of Life depicts the seven days of creation in which God created life. From that we can make the very simple Egg of Life symbol composed of seven circles taken from the design of the Flower of Life. The shape of the Egg of Life is said to be the shape of all things when they first start to grow. But that is a mystery we are presently not able to see or fathom, but we will in time, one day!”

  “They are beautiful and so clean to look at. They look complicated as you say but I can see they are indeed so simple too,” Paul commented as he looked over the sheets.

  “Yes, but that is the simple beauty of it all. Here,” Niccolas said, passing another sheet.

  Fig 8:

  “If I can draw your attention back to the Fruit of Life symbol. Note that it is composed of thirteen circles taken from the design of the Flower of Life. It is said to be the blueprint of the universe, containing the basis for the design of every life form, and everything in existence. It contains the geometric basis for the delineation of Metatron’s Cube, which brings forth the platonic solids. Here, and keep this one,” Niccolas said handing Paul a larger parchment.