Ashes and Ecstasy

by Catherine Hart

  His mother’s words gave Reed food for thought. Was there any truth to the idea that the more a person mourned at first, the more completely they recovered? Could this possibly explain why she had given herself to another man barely a year after she had thought him dead, or was Reed merely looking for a plausible excuse for her actions?

  Still, there was the matter of the child she carried. There was every possibility it could be Jean’s, and Reed could not bear that thought. Time and the birth of the child would tell, and only then would Reed know if he could forgive Kathleen.

  Reed’s eyes scanned the groups of mourners clustered about Emerald Hill. Refreshments had been served, and soon people would be departing, returning to their own homes. His gaze failed to find Kathleen among them, her red-gold hair veiled in black, yet still a beacon in the bright afternoon sunlight. Going in search of her, he finally located a servant who had seen her quietly slip away.

  “Suh, Miz Kafleen done took de buggy.”

  “Did she say where she was going?”

  “No suh, but she headed in de direction ob yo place.”

  Somehow, Reed doubted that Kathleen was at Chimera. For one thing, Sally was there. For another, he had a strong feeling that Kathleen would seek the comfort of the sea, as had always been her habit in past times of stress. If she headed west, as the servant said, she would not be headed for the coast, but for Savannah, and more than likely one of the frigates docked there.

  A hard hour’s ride found Reed pulling his lathered horse to a halt at the docks. His sharp eye noted the absence of the Starbright, Kathleen’s favorite ship, and he cursed the fate that had placed the ship in port at this time. Spotting Dan’s figure on the docks, Reed headed at a lope to intercept the older man.

  “Where is she, Dan? Where is Kathleen? She is out on that damned ship, isn’t she?”

  “Yep, Cap’n,” Dan acknowledged dourly. “Left ’bout half an hour ago. Should ha’ cleared the mouth o’ the river by now.”

  “Damn it, man!” Reed roared, beside himself. “Why did you let her go? She is in no condition to be out on the seas now!”

  Dan eyed Reed in disgust, and spat a long string of tobacco juice into the water before he answered. “Ain’t nothin’ stoppin’ thet woman when she sets her head t’ somethin’, Cap’n. Ye should know thet better than any o’ us by now. 'Sides, how far can she go without a crew?”

  Reed stared at Dan, agape. “She took the Starbright out alone?” He could scarcely believe even Kathleen would dare such a thing!

  “Thet she did, but I wouldn’t worry none. ’Tis my guess she’s headed fer thet cove we used t’ hide the Enchantress thet first year. Thet lass isn’t fool enough t’ do nuthin’ harmful t’ the bairn. She jest needs the feel o’ a deck under her feet t’ ease her misery some.”

  Reed had ridden Titan nearly to his limit by the time he reached the cove, following Dan’s directions. Sure enough, there was the Starbright, safely anchored in the hidden bay, the current lapping gently against her hull.

  Dismounting and pulling off his boots, Reed muttered, “Damn fool woman!” The refreshingly cool water did not chill his temper as he swam out and hoisted himself aboard.

  The first place he looked for her, out of habit, was in the rigging. With a mixture of relief and anxiety, he failed to find her there. Neither was she anywhere on deck. When he did locate her, his anger melted. Kathleen was in the captain’s cabin, sound asleep on the bunk. Her face was tear-streaked, and about her shoulders she clutched one of Kate’s favorite shawls.

  Quietly, Reed tiptoed from the cabin. Swimming back to shore, he untied his horse, looped the reins over his neck, and slapped him sharply on the rump, sending him galloping for home. Titan would most likely reach Chimera long before they would. Then Reed went back to the Starbright and waited.

  It was full dark when Kathleen awoke at last. Her first feeling of calm was disrupted as she immediately sensed another presence in the small cabin. Sitting upright with a jerk, she asked nervously, “Who is here?” How she wished she’d had wits enough to have a weapon handy, but she had been too distressed to think of it earlier.

  She saw the glow of a cheroot, and smelled the smoke as the intruder exhaled. “Relax, Kat. It’s me.” Relief flooded her as she instantly recognized Reed’s deep voice.

  Brushing her tangled hair from her face, she lay back with a weary sigh. “How did you find me?”

  “Dan.” His short answer gave her no hint as to Reed’s mood, but Kathleen was too tired to care.

  “Go back to sleep,” he told her quietly. “Chimera can survive without us till morning.”

  Somehow, Kathleen felt he was not as angry as she had expected, and she dared to ask, her voice quavering with tears of grief once more, “Hold me, Reed. Please come and hold me. I wanted to be alone for a while, but now I need to feel your strength surrounding me.”

  For a time, he held her, letting her cry and kissing the salty tears from her cheeks. At some point, she began to return his caresses, and a measure of needful demand registered in her kisses as she claimed his lips with hers. With trembling hands, she pushed at his clothing, until he willingly removed it to allow her full reign as her fingertips roamed his body, setting fire to his flesh with her knowing touch.

  At her urging, he undressed her, following the path of his hands with his mouth until she cried out in longing. As his body merged with hers, she sighed out his name. She set the rhythm of their lovemaking and when their rapture broke, it was as if they had stepped into the midst of a magnificent rainbow after a summer storm.

  When Kate’s will was read, her oblique statement about seeing to Kathleen’s welfare suddenly came clear. It was obvious that Kate was determined, even beyond the grave, to shield Kathleen from any harm that might befall her. The old lady had willed Emerald Hill to Katlin, with Kathleen as administrator and manager until he was of age. It was specifically stated that Reed was to have no say in matters at Emerald Hill.

  Kathleen was both pleased and embarrassed; and Reed was clearly angry. It was clearly understood that if he wanted Katlin to inherit Kate’s estate, he would have to remain married to Kathleen, like it or not. No longer could he hold the threat of divorce over Kathleen’s head to insure her compliant behavior. In fact, Kate had neatly turned the tables on Reed. Not only did Kathleen now have a safe haven to retreat to if she so desired, but the will stated in absolute terms that if the conditions were not adhered to, the entire estate would go to—of all people— Dominique You!

  Reed could not believe Kate’s audacity. The wily old woman had certainly set the thumbscrews to him! Reed nearly choked on his impotent rage. Since Kate had met Dominique only briefly, Reed could see only one reason why she would make him her heir by default—revenge against Reed for his treatment of her beloved granddaughter. Kate knew, that under present circumstances, Reed would rather die than have any of the Lafitte clan as neighbors. Either he must abide by the terms Kate had set, or have Dominique and Jean practically living on his doorstep.

  Isabel was the only person at Chimera to take full delight in Kate’s directives and Reed’s predicament. Totally understanding Kate’s reasoning, she also had to chuckle at the woman’s wisdom and sense of humor. Kate had succeeded where everyone else had failed—she had taken the reins from Reed’s hands, and placed them in Kathleen’s, which put Sally Simpson at a distinct disadvantage, if not entirely out of the picture. When Kathleen’s baby was born, if it was obviously Jean’s, Kathleen could take refuge at Emerald Hill; and Reed could not take her older children from her unless he wanted to risk having Jean and Dominique residing close to Chimera. What a marvelous turn-about!

  Reed was in a black mood. He growled at everyone for days, and buried himself in his work in a concentrated effort to avoid all of them. Even Sally, distraught over the implications of the will, felt the biting edge of his anger.

  Under the circumstances, it was assumed she would give up and leave Chimera at last, but the stubborn wen
ch stayed on.

  “Will nothing drive her away?” Kathleen moaned in dismay. Since Kate’s will had been read, Reed had been almost impossible to live with, let alone having to put up with Sally, too. Reed was back to being hateful and rude, all traces of tenderness eclipsed by his vile temper, and Kathleen almost wished Kate had not provided for her future welfare. Yet a small voice whispered that the worst could be still to come, and Kathleen might one day be heartily grateful for her grandmother’s concern.

  The first warm October days passed, with little improvement in Reed’s mood. Toward the middle of the month, when Kathleen estimated herself to be a full five months into her pregnancy, she felt the baby move for the first time.

  She and Reed were alone in their room, dressing for dinner, when it happened. Kathleen’s mouth formed a round O, and her eyes grew wide with wonder, as she placed both hands upon her protruding stomach. She must have made some small sound, for Reed stopped in the act of tucking his shirt into his trousers and stared at her intently.

  “What is it, Kat? Is something wrong?” he questioned with a frown.

  “What? Oh, no, everything is just as it should be,” she sighed. Eyes full of awe, she smiled and reached for his hand. “The baby just moved, Reed. Come feel it.”

  Reed jerked back as if burned, a dark scowl drawing his brows together. “No thank you, little mother. I will leave that pleasure completely to you this time around,” he drawled sarcastically.

  Kathleen turned away, rapidly blinking back the tears she was too proud to let him see.

  The incident marked the end of their lovemaking. From that moment on, Reed shared her bed, but he did not touch her. Kathleen told herself it did not matter, for it was time for them to halt such intimacies for the baby’s sake anyway. Still, it pained her that as her belly grew, so did Reed’s rejection of her. If he woke to find her snuggled next to him in the night, he promptly untangled her limbs from his, and turned his back.

  Taking full advantage of the state of things, Sally was, if possible, more impossible than ever; and Reed seemed to take savage delight in tormenting Kathleen by paying special attention to the blonde once more.

  Kathleen was certain she had never been more miserable. “Surely things can get no worse,” she moaned. As if voicing the thought aloud had tilted the scales of fate a notch further in the wrong direction, the very next afternoon, who should suddenly appear on the scene but Dominique You. “Oh, God!” Kathleen groaned, dropping weakly into a chair as Isabel flew out the door to throw herself happily into his warm embrace.

  Kathleen knew that Dominique’s unannounced arrival would send Reed’s temper soaring to new heights, so it was fortunate that he was away in the fields when Dominique appeared. Between them, Isabel and Kathleen quickly outlined the events of the last few months, and heard from Dominique what had been happening on Grande Terre and in New Orleans. A letter from Kate’s attorney had been sent to Dominique in New Orleans, and this, among other things, had prompted his journey to Savannah. “I would have come sooner,” he explained, casting a loving look at Isabel, “but as soon as you had left, word came from New Orleans that Governor Claiborne had arrested Pierre. Jean went immediately to see to his release, but Claiborne held Pierre without bail, and it was just last month that he was freed.”

  “Claiborne held him for four months before letting him go?” Kathleen asked.

  Dominique grinned. “Not exactly, petite. Eleonore’s brother, the good Dr. Charles, finally came to our aid. He claimed Pierre had cholera, and bribed a frightened jailer into turning his back while Charles helped Pierre to escape.”

  “It was all a trick then?” Isabel questioned. “Pierre is alright?”

  “No,” Dominique shook his head, “Pierre does not have cholera,-but he is very ill. Charles says he will recover soon, but the chill, dampness and poor food for such a length of time left Pierre with a deep, hacking cough that he cannot get rid of. He is as weak as a newborn kitten. Francoise is caring for him in New Orleans.”

  “What else has happened?” Isabel wanted to know.

  “The British came again in early September to talk to Jean about joining forces with them ...”

  “And again, Claiborne refused to listen when Jean tried to warn him, I suppose,” Kathleen interjected.

  “Worse than that,” Dominique answered glumly. “Claiborne sent troops to Grande Terre to destroy our base of operation.”

  “What!” the women chorused.

  Dominique nodded. “On September sixteenth, the schooner Carolina, under Commander Patterson, arrived at Grande Terre carrying the infantry troops of Colonel Ross. We had just enough warning for Jean to get most of the ships loaded with goods and out of the bay before they arrived. Jean refused to fire so much as a warning shot.”

  “What happened then?” Kathleen asked.

  “While Jean took the ships and anchored them at Isle Derniére, setting up a new camp, I and my crew set fire to the remaining goods and all the buildings on Grande Terre. Naturally, I was arrested. That is how I came to be in New Orleans when the lawyer’s letter arrived, telling me about the death of Madame Kate.”

  Kathleen sat stunned at the news. In her mind, she could see Jean’s magnificent house with all the fine furnishings, and the beautiful gardens with those precious, invaluable statues she held so dear. Tears stung her eyes. “Oh, Dominique! I am so sorry! I know it was necessary to destroy it all so the troops could not have the pleasure of looting and ruining everything, but to think of that beautiful house and fabulous garden all gone! Jean must be in despair!”

  Dominique shrugged, then stared at her meaningfully. “They were only objects, cherie. One can live with their loss. What hurts more is to arrive and find you with child, obviously well along in your term.” One dark, shaggy eyebrow raised in question. “Am I correct in thinking the child is Jean’s?”

  “That is a question many of us would like to know the answer to,” Kathleen sighed.

  Isabel said, “It is impossible to know whether Jean or Reed fathered this child, Dominique. Though Kathleen has never admitted her affair with Jean, Reed also questions the babe’s parentage. Only the child’s birth will say for sure, and Reed is convinced it will resemble Jean. He threatened to divorce Kathleen and keep Katlin and Andrea from her if this happens. Kate knew this, and that is why she made her will the way she did—to protect Kathleen from Reed’s jealous rage.”

  “What a tangle!” Dominique exclaimed. “My poor Kathleen! I am so sorry ...”

  Kathleen smiled wanly. “And so am I, Dom. But you must see why you cannot stay at Chimera. Reed would probably murder us all!”

  It was arranged that Isabel and Dominique would stay at Emerald Hill during Dominique’s visit. As much as she longed to be with Dominique, Isabel was awash with guilt at leaving Kathleen to face Reed’s anger alone. Kathleen feigned indifference. “He will either kill me, or he won’t,” she joked weakly. “Go on, Isabel. Do not waste time worrying over me, when you can be happy with the man you love.”

  Reed’s reaction went beyond anger, bordering on insanity. He ranted and raved and threatened and roared until everyone on Chimera ran for cover. “Has Dominique come to look over his future property?” he bellowed. “Well, you can tell him for me that snowballs will fly in Hell before he gets his grubby hands on Emerald Hill!”

  “Dominique came to see Isabel,” Kathleen told him wearily. “You might recall that they are in love, and planning to marry after the war. ”

  “How sweet! How cozy!” Reed growled sarcastically. “The two of them had better plan on living elsewhere, then.”

  “I am sure they will,” Kathleen sighed.

  “I suppose Dominique brought you word from Jean. Could he be your liaison in planning a tryst with your pirate lover?” Reed stopped ranting long enough to glare at Kathleen’s swollen stomach. Then he laughed tersely. “Bad timing, my dear! Even Jean would not dare touch you now!”

  Kathleen flinched at his words. “Reed, don
’t be this way! Please!”

  Reed grasped her arms in a hard grip, his blue eyes blazing. “If Dominique came to see Isabel, then let them be together, but you stay completely away from Emerald Hill until he has gone. Do you understand?”

  “Reed! This is ridiculous! Dominique is our friend, and Jean and I are not in communication with one another, nor do we plan to be!”

  “Then stay away from Emerald Hill, and I might believe you,” he growled. “You do want me to believe you, don’t you, Kat?”

  “Yes!” she murmured, trying to hold back her tears.

  For the first time in weeks, he kissed her, a cruel demanding kiss meant to hurt and dominate. As he walked away, Kat touched her bruised lips and dashed the tears from her emerald eyes. “I do want you to believe me, Reed,” she whispered tearfully, “and I want you to love me again as you once did—as I still love you, with all my heart.”

  Chapter 23

  Dominique stayed at Emerald Hill for a week, and true to her word, Kathleen did not see him during that time. Once, Dominique rode over to Chimera with Isabel to try to talk to Reed, but Reed sent him on his way, refusing to have anything to do with his old friend.

  During this week, Reed watched Kathleen like a hawk. When she tried to slip out of bed late one night, Kathleen suddenly found her wrist in the iron clasp of his big hand. “Where do you think you are going at this hour?” he growled.

  Kathleen sighed in exasperation. “Sweet heavens, Reed! I am big with child, and if you don’t mind, I need to visit the water closet—now!”

  Had there been enough light in the room, she might have seen the sheepish look on his face as he released her.

  Knowing Kathleen’s staunch defender was fully occupied at Emerald Hill, Sally made a great display of throwing herself at Reed. While she oozed charm in Reed’s presence, she spat venom in his absence, ridiculing Kathleen’s misshapen form at every opportunity. Kathleen held her ground, difficult though it was.