Divided (Unguarded #2)

by Ivy Stone

  “Lucio shot Elias in the back. He’ll be okay. But Lucio got away,” Roamyn says, tone low, filled with hate. “I’m sorry.”

  I rest my palms on his chest and kink my neck back. “Don’t be. Let’s just have this moment because five minutes ago I never thought I’d get to do this again.”

  He gives me a yearning look. Strokes my hair and inches his face closer to mine. My cheeks blaze as he cups my face. His lush lips so close and tempting. If I dip my tongue out, I could taste him. I move from his lips to his eyes, cautious. Guarded. I want him but I’m not ready for him. My body betrays me and leans in, smashing my lips to his. Hot. Wet. I gasp, and his tongue surges into my mouth. He brands me with a kiss to ruin everyone before him. I circle my arms around his neck before sliding them down to my waist and stepping back, breaking our connection.

  “I need to see Lindsey.”

  He nods as a paramedic wraps a blanket around my arms.

  “Thanks.” I smile, grateful, and take a seat on the back of the ambulance with Roamyn by my side. As if she could read my mind, Lindsey’s voice powers through and she hustles over.

  “Ali.”

  My eyes shine and I smile at my sister. “Lindsey.”

  She wraps me up in a hug. The relief overwhelms me as I cry into her shoulder. Sad tears. Happy tears. It’s all too much for my fragile heart. I didn’t think I’d make it out this time. When Adriana trained her gun at my head and pulled the trigger, I thought it was the end. But it wasn’t. She’d chosen to save us and shot her own father in cold blood. I have no idea why and right now I don’t care. She and Lorenzo got away safe and this is all that matters. Right here. The love transpiring despite complete and utter chaos. That even among disaster, love will always prevail. Mason and Lindsey, smile at one another across the road with the kind of adoration and love happily ever afters are made of. Cassidy holds Elias’s hand trying to hide her worry and concern as they close them into the back of an ambulance to get Elias off to the hospital. I smile up at Roamyn. He grins back, dimples peeking out. My muscles relax with that look. The smirk. It calms my racing heart and everything becomes a little easier. I sigh and turn around. Tilting my head to the side, I lean on his shoulder. His arm comes around me.

  And then there’s us.

  Me.

  Roamyn.

  Caught in the middle of two worlds colliding.

  Silence.

  It could be remedial. Or just the opposite. Some people love it—crave it. I can’t think of anything worse. At least, when I’m not high. The silence sets free the voices inside my head and there’s no place more dangerous than living in the abyss of my own mind.

  And now is no exception.

  The walls are caving in around us. The air, dwindling. Roamyn’s living room has never felt smaller than what it does in this defining moment where silence has become the only thing separating us. The only thing keeping our worlds intact before one of us loses all patience and the ability to think clearly through the lust induced haze we’ve been swimming in for far too long.

  One word. A movement. A look. Is all it will take to change everything and nothing all at the same time because it’s always been Roamyn for me. He runs as deep as the scars etched into my skin and blood in my veins. Once he’s wrapped around me, on top of me, inside of me, I’ll never be able to ever let him go. Which is why my fingers are squeezing the counter so hard my knuckles are turning white and why my mind is screaming at me with every possible reason why being here with him now is the worst idea I’ve ever had. Angry hazel eyes pin me down. Roamyn’s broad chest rises and falls fast as he stands with his hands clenched into fists at his sides, Hulk-like in all his muscled glory. Wide shoulders tower over me, even from a distance. His presence fills the room and steals my breath.

  “Ali.”

  A shudder rolls through me at the gruff sound of his voice. When he says my name it’s like nothing else. I close my eyes and let it soothe me in a way only he’s capable of doing. Off balance, still imagining his face behind my eyes, words fall from my mouth without thought. “Thanks for letting me stay over tonight. I’m exhausted, though.” I reopen my eyes and point to the lounge taking up most of the living room. “I think I’m just gonna go to sleep.”

  A few giant footsteps in my direction and Roamyn’s all but a touch in front of me.

  Nerves swallow my words and I gulp, my throat bobbing with the movement. His frown deepens, jaw ticks. Hands slide to the back of my neck, pulling me in before I can stop him from getting dangerously close. My body stiffens at the firmness of his touch. Pleasure spirals through every crevice of my body because this is heaven and hell. Pleasure and torture. Familiarity. This is Roamyn. Strong and firm. Always.

  He lowers his head to mine, so close I feel his breath warm my face. “I nearly lost you today, babe. Are you really gonna pretend after the day we had… after the past seven fuckin’ years of this… us.” He gives my neck a gentle squeeze. “That you don’t want to know what it would feel like to have my lips kissing your skin? My cock deep inside of you while I give you everything I should have a long time ago?”

  His words become whispers of truth in my ear. I do want it. I’ve wanted it since I was fifteen years old. Warmth trails against my skin as Roamyn’s nose caresses my cheek before bringing his face back to mine.

  “I want to feel you, Ali. I want to feel us together just once before you shut me out.”

  My chest tightens at the pain cutting through the last of his words. He knows. He knows I’m about to close the door on every moment, every laugh, every crazy second we’ve shared together. I can’t move forward with him holding my hand, not anymore. And I can’t fall back to an addiction I won’t escape twice. And I will fall, I’ll fall because I’m still too weak for him. I’m walking a tightrope and one small slip in the wrong direction will send me crashing down. Because I’m powerless against Roamyn Tate and the hold he has over me.

  He’s my heart.

  My soul.

  My Kryptonite.

  He’ll be my undoing.

  This is how it has to be. At least for now. On my own. Fighting for myself. Dependent on no one because if I were to lose him now, I’ll lose myself too. I can’t be dependent on him to give me a reason for living. I need to be enough, for me. But maybe, just once, for one night, could we forget about everything else and just give in. We can forget about the past, ignore the future and bask in a moment we’ll spend forever chasing.

  I bite the inside of my cheek. What am I thinking? I’m not strong enough for just once and our hearts will always want more.

  My lips part and heavy breaths fall through my small voice. “One time will never be enough. We both know that.”

  His eyes soften. His other arm comes up where he cups my cheek. “You’re right. But I’m hoping once is all it’ll take to make you realize no matter what, we’re always better together than we are apart.”

  His hope weighs me down. How can he possibly believe that? We’re chaos and crashes, not roses and happiness.

  “We’ve been a lot of things, Roam. But together isn’t one of them.”

  I lower my head thinking how time has changed everything.

  Years of hearing his smooth voice lift me up and pull me down.

  Years of accidental touches, stolen glances, and forbidden feelings.

  I fought against us.

  He fought for the both of us.

  He pulled away.

  I pushed back.

  We’re a mess. Reckless. Beautiful. Destructive, and I’ve never wanted anything more in my life.

  The last of my resolve peels away with the what ifs, maybes and my shameful lack of self-preservation. God, I’m a masochist.

  Roamyn lifts my chin, giving me no choice but to look at him. To face what I’ve just allowed to happen.

  His hands glide down my sides, firm and slow. Reaching my hips, they splay around my ass. Wetness pools between my thighs and my eyes close, breathing in his touch, his scen
t, the uneven strumming of my heart. I want to capture every piece of this moment and lock it away, somewhere deep, hidden. Where I can treasure it forever. Roamyn pulls me against him and my hands fly to his hard chest. We’re nose to nose. Lips barely apart. Bodies molding to one when he rolls his hips forward, his hardness thrusting up against me. An inferno rages in my core. Light moans fall from my lips, spurring on my hands that are now gripping his thick, muscled arms. My breathing, needy. My body, anxious.

  His hands loosen around my ass and glide under my top, all the way up to my breasts where he pulls the cups back and grazes my nipples. He rubs over the tight buds and a shiver shoots up my spine. I arch my back into him and he kisses my shoulders, my neck, across my cheek, trying to bring us impossibly closer. His thigh meshes between my legs and I grind against him, all inhibitions gone. I bite down on my lip to hold in everything I want to say but know I shouldn’t. And somehow he knows, I can see it in his frown, those eyebrows all drawn in. His square jaw, tight with anticipation, just waiting for me to come to my senses and put a stop to this. But his hungry almond eyes contradict every other feeling. Lust swirls behind them and the look, one I’m so familiar with, one I’ve committed to memory stares back at me with as much fire inside his eyes as I feel coursing through my body.

  A minute passes, or maybe it’s seconds. “Good. Because I’ve waited far too fucking long to do this.”

  All air escapes me as his face descends on mine. His lips conceal any coherent response. Our tongues tangle with unrelenting need. Fingers twirl through my hair until Roamyn knots it in his hand followed by a gentle tug. The pull spikes excitement and goosebumps coat my skin as he brushes light kisses against my exposed throat.

  Lust. Love. Excitement. Years of the most torturous foreplay explodes from both of us as we tear at each other’s clothes. As my fingers claw at his back. As our world’s shift from one dimension to the next because nothing, nothing has ever felt like this. It’s all consuming—electric. Seven years in the making. A night I’ll never forget.

  A groan comes from Roamyn as he tears his lips from mine. “Bedroom.”

  I nod and he hoists me up in his strong arms. Lifting me as if I’m weightless. My legs wrap around his waist, my pussy rubs against his cock and every step toward the bedroom is a brush closer to an orgasm. Except we don’t make it there straight away. He kisses me up against the wall, then against the door to his bedroom until we finally make it in and Roamyn sets me down, his hands never leave me. They trace the top of my shorts all the way to the front where he unbuttons them and pushes them down. The soft touch prickles a shiver over my skin, tightening my nipples. He slips off the rest of my clothes, painfully slow and as my black lace bra falls to the ground, and I become bare to Roamyn. Bare in a way I never have before. I grab my arm, covering my scars with my hand so he won’t see the ugly.

  His fingers clamp down around my wrist and he pulls my hand down. “Ali. Don’t hide, baby. I want to see you… all of you.”

  His fingers glide over my scars and the usual searing of pain burdening me with the bad memories of them, never surfaces. Instead, my body smolders, ready to combust if Roamyn doesn’t hurry the hell up.

  “You’re so beautiful, Ali.” He kisses my neck, hands still caressing my skin. “So fucking beau—”

  “Roamyn,” I breathe out and reach down for his belt buckle. “If you don’t have these clothes off in the next ten seconds, I’m going to have to take care of this on my own. I can’t wait any longer. I’ve already waited long enough.”

  Roamyn groans. My body writhes with desire.

  “I don’t want to hurt you.”

  I shake my head as he refers to the few bruises and cuts from today. “You won’t.”

  He rips his shirt over his head and his pants glide over the round globes of his tight ass. They slide down the ‘V’ lines leading to the very piece of him I want to spend hours devouring. My throat thickens as his cock springs free, glistening with pre-cum. I lick my lips and Roamyn notices the action.

  Every muscle in his body tenses. “You want my cock, Ali?”

  “Yes,” I reply, voice raspy.

  He storms forward with hungry eyes. “Good ‘cause I’ve been imagining your sweet cunt milking my cock for far too fucking long.”

  Scooping me up in his strong arms, he sends us backward into his bed. He brings my hands together above my head in one swift movement. His wet lips kiss tenderly over my breasts.

  “God, I could kiss you every day for the rest of my life and it still wouldn’t be enough.” He sucks my nipple into his mouth. Swirls his tongue over the bud and my back arches in response.

  “Are you on birth control?” he murmurs, switching between breasts. Sucking. Nipping. Pulling.

  My brows squish together at his question. “Yeah. Why?”

  He moves lower down my stomach. “Because I want to feel all of you, Ali. If this is my only chance at ever having you, I’m going to savor every fucking second of it. And I want to do it with nothing between us. I’m clean. And I know you are too.”

  I pull up to my elbows. My hair grazes my naked back and falls around the sheets. “How do you know that?”

  Roamyn looks up, innocent as ever and shrugs. “I saw the doctor’s report after you got out of Sweet Tarts.”

  I open my mouth to speak but decide against it. Another conversation for another day. Right now what I need is to drown in everything Roamyn. I inhale his woodsy scent and turn my face to the side clutching the sheets in my hands. Roam’s kisses grow lower. Softer. Tantalizing. Seductive.

  “Oh God, Roam.”

  He slides back up my body, hovering above. Sitting back on his heels his fingertips graze my inner thighs. He reaches my knees and spreads my legs apart. He lines his cock up at my entrance and swirls it through my desire. Long, slow strokes. Up and down. The pressure—teasing. Enough to send my body crazy with lust. I groan and he surges forward, filling me up. His hands land around my neck. Pulling out to the tip he thrusts in again. This time settling himself all the way in. I quiver with every movement. Our bodies rub together. Our hands link together, squeezing tight as we power toward nirvana. My heels dig into his ass, pushing harder each time he jerks inside of me.

  “Seven fucking years.” He breathes out through each thrust. His hands sweep over my forehead and he pulls back the loose strands of hair tickling my face. “You’re worth every excruciating second of the wait.”

  He sits back and grips my hips. My skin pinches beneath his grip and he pounds into me. Harder. Faster. Unforgiving. My heart soars at his declaration and the new angle is all I need to tip me over the edge. I fall, fall into the depths of the only man I’ve ever loved. I fall over the brink of orgasm. Of pure bliss and God is it a beautiful drop. My toes curl. My walls contract around this gorgeous man above me as he hammers home. His body quakes and with a throaty grunt he pulses inside of me, filling me up with his cum.

  Our labored breathing becomes the only sound in the dark room. Roamyn collapses on top of me and the moon shines down on him, lighting up the defined muscle tone in his back.

  Roamyn’s weight adds pressure to my chest and I struggle to catch my breath after the mind-blowing sex. “Not that I want to move right now. Just for the record, I don’t. But you’re squishing me and I can’t exactly breathe.”

  He chuckles into my neck. Breath tickling my skin and I squirm. Propping up on his hands, he hovers over me. With a twinkle in his eyes, he gleams down at me, sated and pleased with himself if the smirk teasing at his lips is anything to go by. I scoff. Still cocky.

  I trail my fingers lazily over the veins in his forearm and weave them around to his sweaty chest. His gaze following the swirls I’m making with my fingers.

  “What are you thinking?” I ask.

  He sighs and angles his head toward me, a sad smile on his face. “I’m thinking that no matter how many times I dreamed about this happening, not one of those dreams compares to the real thing.”

&
nbsp; I melt. I swoon. I hurt. All at once. I’ve pined over the guy since I was fifteen and finally I’ve got him. He’s got me. But it’s not our time. Not yet. I ignore the voices in my head and live in this moment for a little longer.

  I smile at him. “Smooth talker, aren’t you?”

  He winks. “Only for you, babe.”

  My head tilts back and I laugh before shifting under him. “We better get cleaned up.”

  He rolls over, biceps bulging as he rests his hands behind his head. “Yeah, gotta get ready for round two.”

  I arch a brow. “Round two?”

  He looks at me like I’ve asked the most ridiculous question. “Babe. Seven years.”

  Enough said.

  Sunlight pulls me from sleep. I open one eye and glance up. The sun is shining through, a reminder I never closed the blinds last night. The distraction behind not doing it hardens the semi I’m already sporting. I close my eyes again, lids heavy and roll over to the empty side of the bed. I haven’t had nearly enough sleep. Ali’s vanilla perfume wafts from the pillow and I breathe in the scent I’ve come to recognize as Ali. Everything vanilla makes me think of her. The clashing sounds of pots and pans comes from outside the room and I figure Ali must be making breakfast. I yawn and sit up on the side of the bed. Yanking up my boxers from the floor, I slip them on, pull my dick up to lean against the waistband because it’s still hard as fuck from thinking about Ali.

  I wander into the kitchen. Music pumps from the stereo and there’s Ali’s little round ass, shaking in the air as she checks on something in the oven. She sings the lyrics to the song playing, completely out of tune and I lean my elbows on the counter, a hand coming up to cover the grin I can’t hide because fuck, she couldn’t get any cuter. Her long blonde hair swishes around and my head tilts to the side as I admire her ass, peeking out under my shirt. She spins around and stops mid-step.

  “Roamyn.” Her cheeks blush.

  “By all means. Please, continue what you’re doing,” I say, my smile now huge and completely unhidden.