Echoes and Embers

by Cyndi Friberg

  Alyssa stared at his glistening wings, quickly listing all of the places he should search. Her heart ached and her throat burned. She didn’t want to be his passenger. She wanted to unfurl her wings and soar at his side.

  * * * * *

  “Milady, you have a visitor.”

  Imogene’s words came at nearly the same moment as her perfunctory knock. The door to the counting room stood ajar, so Alyssa dismissed her flash of annoyance. The servant wasn’t really intruding. “Who has come to call?”

  “He introduced himself as Sir Diadem. Rather odd name if you ask me. Says he met Lady Rosalind at court last summer and wondered if she were available to visitors.”

  Intrigued, Alyssa pushed back her chair and stood. They had met many people during their stay at court, but she didn’t remember Sir Diadem. The dreaded mist again, or had Rosalind not mentioned the introduction? Impatiently tucking a stray curl into place, Alyssa left the counting room.

  A tall blond man stood facing the fire as Alyssa entered the great hall. One side of his cloak was tossed back over his shoulder and he was working to remove leather gauntlets. At first glance Alyssa was struck by how much he resembled Sariel.

  Diadem. Another name for crown. Crowns was one of the angelic orders. Alyssa struggled to calm her whirling thoughts. Not everyone she met was an angel.

  “May I help you?” The man turned to face her and Alyssa reconsidered. This was no mortal man. Her instincts surged, prickling uncomfortably.

  “Enos, Lord Diadem. I regret that we have not been properly introduced. We never crossed paths at court.”

  She acknowledged his bow with the subtle incline of her head. He waited for her to proffer her hand, but Alyssa just studied him. His features were arranged more delicately than Sariel’s, but there was a definite resemblance. “What brings you to Monthamn Castle?”

  “I was visiting a neighbor nearby when I remembered that Monthamn Castle is the home of Lady Rosalind. I thought only to renew our acquaintance. Is she available?”

  “Who were you visiting?” Her gaze narrowed on his handsome face. Their nearest neighbor was three hours’ ride due west and she knew for a fact the family was across the channel in Burgundy.

  “Lord and Lady Consterns. They recently inherited Wolverton Green. That was the purpose for my visit.”

  His ink-black gaze met hers directly, but Alyssa couldn’t silence her instincts. This man was not what he seemed. She’d heard of Wolverton Green but didn’t know who currently occupied the manor.

  Excuses and lies tumbled through her mind, but Alyssa resisted each one. She must speak only truth or the mists would swirl in and abolish reality. “I’m sorry. My ward is unavailable. You’ve made the trip in vain. I’ll let her know you stopped by. Would you like to leave a message?”

  He heaved an audible sigh, draping his gauntlets across one broad shoulder. “I noticed an inn in the village. When do you expect Lady Rosalind to return? I hate to have come all this way for nothing. I don’t mind waiting a day or two.”

  “I don’t honestly know when she’ll return. I’m sorry you’ve been inconvenienced. If you had sent a message ahead, I could have saved you the trouble.”

  “Where is Lady Rosalind?” His deep voice carried a subtle compulsion. “Perhaps I can visit her at her present location.”

  Wickedness flashed within his gaze before he concealed it from view. Alyssa felt it more than saw it. Fallen! This was no angel. She was entertaining a demon.

  Guarding her expression and her thoughts, she chose her words carefully. Could he read her mind as Sariel could? Could he sense her emotions? Smell her fear? “I do not know you, sirrah. I’m not comfortable giving you information about Lady Rosalind.”

  His dark gaze narrowed. They stared at each other, tension mounting.

  “As you wish.” He finally relented and strode from the hall.

  Alyssa exhaled a shaky breath and hurried to the stairs leading to the parapets. She climbed to the highest tower and watched until the stranger emerged on the drawbridge. Her heart pounded and her spirit cried out for Sariel.

  Had she just located his lost subordinate?

  Why was a demon searching for Rosalind?

  Chapter Five

  “Your ruse will not fool them for long, Rosalind. Let me take you back to the castle. It’s not seemly for us to be here alone and you know it.”

  “Nay.” Wrapping her fingers around the warm pottery cup, Rosalind inhaled the fragrant brew. God only knew what herbs Ray had mixed into the steaming beverage. His cottage was cozy and welcoming. She felt more comfortable surrounded by its wattle and daub walls than within the dank, drafty corridors of Monthamn Castle. “Danny was told to discard my cloak as soon as he crossed the river. No one will remember me passing their way because a lad is riding my horse.”

  “You put yourself in great danger venturing out alone.” Ray’s sensual mouth pressed into a grim, disapproving line.

  “You sound just like Alyssa. I came here to escape her. I’ve made up my mind. I’ll not go back until Alyssa controls me no longer.”

  “Lady Alyssa is your guardian—”

  “For three more years, unless I wed.” Rosalind paused, sipping the tea Ray had given her shortly after she arrived. Her teeth had stopped chattering, but an occasional chill still shook her shoulders. She hadn’t realized the forest would be so cold when she gave Danny her mantle. “I’m not spending three years under the guardianship of…” Even in her anger, Rosalind couldn’t speak the words. She owed Alyssa a great debt. Alyssa had appeared at the blackest moment in Rosalind’s life, giving her hope, helping her beyond the consuming grief. But her friend, her mentor, her confidante slipped further into madness every day. “I can’t watch it happen. It’s breaking my heart.”

  He took the tea from her and cupped her fingers between his palms. “What is this about? What has you so upset?”

  Attracted by the strength of his powerful body and the affection in his leaf-green eyes, Rosalind moved closer. She rested her head on his shoulder. Time paused as she waited for his arms to close around her. The gentle pressure came at last and she sighed.

  “Alyssa is losing her mind,” she whispered against his chest. “I’ve tried to ignore the signs, to convince myself it isn’t true, but she grows more confused with each passing day.”

  Ray eased her away and looked into her eyes. “You’re serious? Lady Alyssa’s behavior has been unusual?”

  “Alyssa has always been unusual, but lately… No, it began clear back at court.”

  “Court can make anyone act erratically.”

  Alyssa cocked one of her eyebrows in speculation. “You say that as if you’ve been there.” So many things about Ray were inconsistent. From the moment she’d met him at summer’s end, she suspected there was more to her mysterious gamekeeper than he was willing to share. His speech was too refined, his clothing too costly for the menial occupation he had accepted.

  Monthamn’s steward frequently hired workers without Rosalind’s specific approval. It was the steward’s responsibility to see to such matters. Still, Ray fascinated Rosalind. She sensed secrets in his past, something elusive and dangerous.

  “You have a vivid imagination.” He stroked his fingertip along the side of her face then stepped away. “Tell me about Lady Alyssa.”

  Disappointed by his willingness to end their embrace, Rosalind hesitated. Had she been wrong to come here? She studied him for a moment. Sunlight revealed gold tones in his thick brown hair. Even now his gaze caressed her. She hadn’t missed the way his hand lingered against her skin or the tension in his expression as he released her. Her plan was sound. Ray wanted her.

  “Alyssa has always had a tendency to embellish, but at court it was as if she truly believed her wild tales. Each time we were introduced to someone new she had a different accounting of her past. I thought it some sort of game, but when I asked her about it, she couldn’t remember anything but her latest story. It frightened me terribly.
”

  “You returned from court before harvest began. Why the upset now? What brings you here this morning?”

  She grasped the ends of her trailing sleeves and met his gaze directly. “You. I want you to wed with me.” A smile slowly bowed his lips and tenderness filled his gaze. Her heart fluttered wildly and the secret place between her thighs ached as never before.

  Take me in your arms. Kiss me senseless. Say you’ve dreamed of this day forever.

  Silence stretched between them. She fidgeted, willing him to speak. Finally she averted her gaze. “Say something.”

  “Oh, sweet Rosalind, I’m flattered that you would even consider me, but it would never be allowed. You will wed a great lord, an earl at least. I’m your gamekeeper.”

  Her heart pounded and she returned her gaze to his handsome face. “Are your affections engaged elsewhere? I’ve seen how you look at me. I know you have feelings for me.”

  “You’re as fresh and lovely as any man could desire. But you are meant for grander things than me. You shouldn’t even be here. If Lady Alyssa realized you—”

  She threw herself into his arms, molding her breasts against his chest and stretching to her toes. Pressing her lips to his, she waited for him to take over.

  He closed his arms around her. His mouth moved against hers for one sweet moment. Then with a strangled groan he eased her away, maintaining a light hold on her upper arms. “I cannot do this! I am not of your station. Lady Alyssa could have me arrested just for touching you.”

  She smiled. He hadn’t said he didn’t want her, just that Alyssa would disapprove. “Then don’t touch me. Let me touch you.” She boldly pressed her palm to the considerable bulge in the front of his hose.

  He caught her wrist and moved her hand to his hip. “What happened last night?”

  “I don’t want to talk about it. I want to touch you and be touched by you. I want to understand…” She tried to twist from his grasp, but his hands wouldn’t release her. He stared into her eyes, his gaze patient and compelling. “At court several men kissed me, one even dared to touch my breast. I want to feel those sensations again. I want to understand where they lead.”

  “Your curiosity is natural, but you didn’t answer my question. Something specific happened to bring all these emotions to the surface. Talk to me.”

  “A friend of Lailah’s came to visit, but he isn’t Lailah’s friend at all. As soon as Lailah departed, I found him with Alyssa. In her chamber. In her bed!”

  “Ahh, I see. Is this gentleman perchance handsome and quite appealing to you?”

  She gasped. “I am not jealous.” Heat crawled up along her throat. “At least not in the way you mean.”

  He cupped her shoulders with his hands. “You envy their pleasure?”

  She leaned toward him, lowering her lashes to conceal her gaze. “Not just their pleasure. I long for companionship, security. I want someone to hold me in the night and kiss me in the morning.”

  “You will have that and more when you wed.”

  “I know.” She wrapped her arms around his neck. “That’s why I want to wed with you.”

  He smiled and shook his head. “It would never be allowed. You must marry a gentleman, a man of wealth and—”

  “I want you.”

  “You don’t even know me.” He tugged on her arms, but she locked her fingers, refusing to budge. “What is my full name? Where was I born? Do I have a wife and children already?”

  “You use no other name but Ray. There is an unusual inflection in your speech, but I’ve been unable to determine its origin. I’ve thought long and hard about the circumstances that would have brought someone like you to this secluded cottage.”

  “Someone like me?” His hands descended along her arms, settling against her waist, but he didn’t push her away.

  “I think you lost your family to the Black Death, just as I did. I think you turned your back on the land of your birth because it was too painful to remain. I think you made your living with your sword for a time but grew tired of the killing and now you’re hiding from the world until your ravaged heart heals.”

  “That’s quite a supposition.”

  He hadn’t argued even one point. How close to the truth had she stumbled? “You are more than a gamekeeper, Ray. I want you for my husband.”

  His eyes gleamed with emotions she couldn’t decipher. Circling her waist with one arm, he drew her against him. He cupped her cheek, his thumb stroking her bottom lip. “You want a husband to set you free and I am the convenient solution. Do you love me?”

  “I’ve never felt for any man what I feel for you. I don’t know if it’s love or not.”

  He closed his eyes for a moment, inhaling a slow deep breath. “I cannot be your husband, Rosalind. No matter how much I wish it were so.”

  “You want me.” She touched his face, waiting until he opened his eyes before she went on. “I hear it in your voice and feel it in your touch. You want this as much as I do. Are you already wed? Is that what keeps you from me?”

  “You don’t know the things I’ve done, can’t comprehend the things I’ve seen.”

  “I don’t care. We can begin anew today. Nothing came before this moment and the future is ours to control.”

  “Until the past consumes it.”

  He lifted her against his chest, claiming her mouth with his. Her feet barely grazed the floor. She hung suspended in his embrace. Looping her arms around his neck, she opened her mouth, accepting the bold thrust of his tongue. Hot darts of pleasure shot down her spine and lodged low in her belly. Even the most daring court swain had not kissed her with such fervor.

  Their kiss went on and on. He delved deeply, nibbled and tasted. His hot breath filled her lungs. Her head spun. If his arms hadn’t clutched her to him, she would have crumpled to the floor at his feet. She felt weak and dizzy, giddy with desire.

  Please, let this never end!

  He cupped her bottom, rubbing her feminine heat against his hardened shaft. “We have to stop,” he whispered against her kiss-dampened lips. “I cannot wed you and I will not take what belongs to your husband.”

  “I want this. I want you.”

  With a frantic sweep of his arm, he cleared the wooden table and set Rosalind upon it. She parted her thighs automatically. He pushed her skirts above her knees. Their mouths met and molded as he worked the laces of her gown. She’d won! He would take her, make her a woman. Make her his.

  She would be free.

  His hands moved with remarkable speed. She lifted her arms from her long sleeves and her gown bunched around her waist. He paused to cup her breast through the translucent material of her chemise. Arching into his hand, she absorbed the heat, thrilled at the pressure of his palm against her flesh.

  He angled the wide neckline, revealing one pert nipple. Dragging his mouth from hers, he gazed at the treasure he’d bared. “So beautiful.”

  She took his hand and guided it back to her breast. “Touch me. Don’t stop touching me.”

  He cupped the back of her head with one hand while the other explored her breasts. Tingling pleasure erupted, twisted and shot into the very core of her body. She gasped. His mouth returned to hers, his kiss deep and demanding. He grew bolder, more aggressive. His tongue thrust rhythmically. A pang of fear intruded on Rosalind’s arousal. Would he marry her once he’d taken her virginity?

  His hand slipped beneath her skirt, stroking her thighs. Should she allow him these liberties now or wait until he wed her? She ached for their joining, but she couldn’t afford to play the fool.

  “Relax,” he whispered against her mouth. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

  She wasn’t worried about physical pain. She knew it would sting when he…mounted her, but he had to be willing to follow through with her plan or she would surrender her body for nothing.

  His lips slid along her throat, explored her shoulder and the upper curve of her breasts. He closed his lips around her nipple and eased his finger
s between her thighs. Passion coiled within her, deep, aching pulses of desire. She needed him inside her, burned for the culmination to these sensations.

  He sucked upon one breast and then adjusted the chemise so he could taste the other, his fingers absently stroking her damp folds. “Say the word and I’ll stop.” It was more of a taunt than an assurance. The proof of her desire was at his fingertips. He paused, staring deep into her eyes. “We both burn for something we cannot have, but I can give you this at least. I can show you where the sensations lead.”

  “You’re not going to…take me?”

  “Nay.” He stroked her with his middle finger, grazing her feminine slit. “But I’ll touch you and let you touch me.”

  She trembled at the implication. He intended to bare his body and let her explore. “Aye, please.”

  Moving to her side, he kept his hand between her legs, caressing and teasing. “Loosen my hose.” Rosalind licked her lips, her gaze falling to the thick column outlined by his clingy garment. “If you want to touch me, uncover me.”

  Her fingers shook as she tugged on his laces. Never before had she seen an aroused man. Her body melted, throbbing forcefully. Desire made her bold. She tugged his hose down and watched him spring free. Thick and long, his shaft arched toward her from a nest of dark gold curls. The sac below was lightly dusted with hair and seemed less threatening, so she started her exploration there.

  Slipping her hand between his thighs, she lightly cupped his balls. They rested heavily in her palm and she gave them a careful squeeze. With a throaty groan, Ray guided her hand to his shaft and curved her fingers around his thickness. She slid her hand upward then down, awed by the contrast of silky-soft skin and marble-hard flesh.

  He showed her how to move, how to please him. “Now close your eyes and imagine me here.” He touched the opening to her passage where her maidenhead blocked his way. Rosalind whimpered. Her inner muscles fluttered and her legs shook. “That’s right. Move as I move.”

  He concentrated on a spot so incredibly sensitive the pleasure was nearly pain. “It…hurts,” she whispered, her eyes tightly shut.