Beautifully Done

by Riley Mackenzie

  I could tell Chase wasn’t sure how to handle Tack. The situation was unusual, to say the least, we were all on edge. Chase accepted the dig with a nod then looked me square in the eyes. “You stepped in front of a loaded gun aimed at my wife?” He wasn’t asking, like he wouldn’t have done the same thing.

  I clapped Tack’s back and changed the subject. “We want to see her before she goes anywhere.”

  “Yeah, of course.”

  “So you’re saying she’s going to be all right?” Tack needed reassurance, something more definitive.

  “I’m saying I’ve got her.” Curt and to the point, Chase might have been answering Tack, but his eyes were on me and they said it all.

  There were no guarantees in life, we’d aced that lesson years ago, but he’d rather take the bullet before he let anything happen to my woman on that table. Because it’s what you did. And that was as much reassurance as we were gonna get.

  “Dr. Colton. I came as soon as I was notified.” The hospital Chief of Staff made a fast approach interrupting our conversation, obviously coming from something casual, dressed in jeans and a polo. I wasn’t surprised to see him since Tal was faculty, but I couldn’t help feeling like he had another motive. “Asher?” Obviously, he was surprised to see me. Sitting on the hospital board, Michael Kenny and I were professionally well-acquainted. He was aware of my longstanding friendship with Chase, and I assumed he knew Talia and I were involved, but I was positive he had no clue how intimately overlapped our lives really were. “ER chief gave me an update and I just looked at the CT. Trauma team can handle it if you want.”

  Chase’s eyes imperceptibly bulged when he clipped, “I’ve got it.”

  “I was just suggesting. I know you and Dr. Pryce are old friends, if you think you’re too close?” Those last two words were not lost on either of us.

  “She’s not family, Mike. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a scan to review before my case.” He turned and started to walk away before he looked back over his shoulder. “Give me ten minutes and I’ll take you to her.”

  I nodded and Tack said thanks.

  “Michael Kenny, medical Chief of Staff. ”

  Tack shook his hand and introduced himself as Talia’s son. He was noticeably disappointed by Chase’s cold response, but did his best to cover.

  “Your mother’s an asset to this institution, we’re lucky to have her. I’m sorry this unfortunate accident happened, but she’s in excellent hands. The best, actually.”

  Tack inhaled sharply. He might have been ignorant to the hidden meaning behind Kenny and Chase’s exchange, but he definitely picked up the Chief’s compliment.

  “Asher, please let me know if you need anything. Anything at all. Let’s pray for a quick recovery.”

  “Thanks, Michael. I appreciate it.” And I did. It was his job to oversee hospital policy and procedure. He easily could have pulled the ethics card. I appreciated his blind eye. He was no fool. He’d want the best taking a scalpel to his significant other as well.

  Alone once again, I once-overed Tack who was deep in thought. “Let’s get a drink, bud.” Hesitantly he agreed, but was relieved to stay put when Lili walked in with a cardboard container holding three cups of coffee. “Perfect timing.”

  “Thought you could use this.”

  Tack took his cup and parked himself back in a chair. It was obviously a waiting room for one purpose. To wait. And Tack had no intentions of going anywhere.

  “Is he okay?” she whispered, pulling me into the hall.

  “He will be. On the other side. Once it’s done.”

  She nodded, not pressing any further. Nothing about this whole messed up situation was okay. None of us were okay. And we wouldn’t be. Until Tal was home in our bed, bulletless, biting her lip and getting all sassy, I was not going to be okay.

  “I talked to Avery.” Lil stopped there, and I got the gist. The Craig clan would undoubtedly be descending in a few hours and I had zero say about it. It’s how we rolled. And I loved them for it, but right now I wasn’t feeling it. I wasn’t feeling anything other than spending time with my woman.

  “Mr. Craig, Mr. Pryce, Dr. Colton asked me to come get you. Of course, Mrs. Colton, you’re welcome as well. The OR is ready and we’re getting ready to move Dr. Pryce upstairs.”

  The sick pit in my stomach churned as we followed the young nurse down the quiet corridor. The nervous energy at my back fueled the bile threatening to rise. Tack wasn’t going to trust anything until he saw her with his own eyes.

  She escorted us down a few long halls, away from the craziness. I wasn’t familiar with this part of the hospital. It was quieter, more private than the hectic trauma bay. From a distance, I saw a lone stretcher in front of a massive steel elevator that had direct access to the OR. Several varying-sized bags of fluid still hung from poles attached to her bed, while the blue monitor at the bottom broke up the monotonous sea of sterile white surrounding her. This time nothing was tainted red. The blankets were tucked in such a way that her already slender frame looked tinier, leaving only her face exposed. A few blonde strands had escaped from beneath a thin blue cap and needed to be tucked behind her ears. But the tubing securing the nasal cannula feeding her oxygen was using that space. The mask was gone. Her eyes were closed. She looked peaceful.

  She heard us silently approach, lifted her lids, and smiled. A heart-stopping beautiful smile. My woman had a bullet lodged in her goddamn back and this was her way to comfort us, make it easier for us. Sweet Jesus, her armor was made of iron. She was bulletproof.

  Tack flew directly to her side. “Mom. I love you.” No how are you, no don’t worry, no you’re going to be fine. Nope. Straight to the point, he needed to put it out there, saying the only thing that mattered. I stilled with burning eyes. At nineteen he had already figured it out. It was the only thing mattered. “They say Chase is the best, you’re in good hands.”

  “He tell you that?” Tal half-smirked, struggling to keep her eyes open to look past us. I cringed thinking about how much pain my woman was in and wished it on myself a million times over, but at least they made her comfortable. I followed her gaze to find Chase now standing at the foot of the bed. Even through her sass, her soft eyes were searching his. He answered her question with a barely there smile, but it was enough. He and Tack were good. Content, she moved her eyes back to her son. “Now listen to me, I know this is scary, but I’m okay. His ego doesn’t need to hear it, but you’re right, I’m in good hands. And ... I love you too.” She spoke slowly and calmly. Tack rapidly blinked and stiffened his spine, struggling to control his emotion. His armor was not as strong. Yet. The vice that had taken up residence in my chest from the second he said ‘she’s been shot’ managed to squeeze even tighter witnessing his raw vulnerability. Tal unburied her arm from the waffled blanket and egged him closer whispering, “It’s gonna be okay, baby.”

  He kissed her colorless cheek, nodding to convince himself and walked away. He needed his minute.

  Lili stepped up. “Don’t worry, sweetie, I’ll go with him. You just hurry up and get back here. I need you healthy, I can’t handle hormonal asspuck without ya. I love you.”

  “Thanks, Lil, see you later.”

  Lil swiped her tears, exchanged a meaningful glance with her husband then squeezed my shoulder as she walked by.

  Chase followed her halfway down before he wrapped her up. When her muffled sobs echoed down the hall it dawned on me that it was the first time they were seeing each other. Fuck you, Roy Wayne. I shut it down; I’d deal with that anger later. That bastard wasn’t stealing one more second of our time. It was just me and her.

  My turn.

  I went straight for her lips. She was warm and tasted like my Tal. “Teeps, god, you’re beautiful.”

  “I know you’re lying, Ace, but thank you. Putrid yellow’s not exactly my color.” She bit her lip and jostled the blanket to show her gown. She gave me two of the three and I didn’t think it was possible, but I love
d her more for it. Now I just needed her bulletless.

  “Promise me you won’t give the asshole any surprises in there, okay? I want him in and out. And I want what’s mine back in one perfect piece.”

  Her smile spread to a grin, and her chocolate crystals pooled. “I love you. You know that, right?” Her voice was so raspy and frail. I wanted my vibrant Tal back.

  Don’t you dare go there.

  I swallowed the blade in my throat. “You get back down here and we’re gonna talk about changing that last name of yours.” I kissed her again, memorizing everything about it. “I love you too, more than you know,” I whispered, not because Chase was back, but it was all I could manage to get out.

  It was time.

  One last kiss and I stood up, wiped my face, and smacked Chase on the back. “Fix her, man. She’s my everything.”

  His team wheeled her onto the elevator and I prayed to God her armor didn’t crack.

  The relief on Chase’s face was the cure better than oxygen. My lungs expanded wide and I could finally breathe again.

  It was over.

  My family hung back while Tack and I met him at the door. Over the five and a half hours of waiting hell, the administrative conference room had become the Craig family respite. They arrived like clockwork, staking claim and parking it for the long haul. All of them, except for my parents. Luckily, Molly convinced Ma to stay home with Dad by promising hourly updates. Add Lil, Sierra, and Dodd and we outgrew the waiting room. Coffee cups and tissue boxes were scattered, chairs were shuffled, and a fresh fruit and sandwich platter lingered in the middle of the table. Leave it to my sisters to never arrive empty handed. As much as I wasn’t feeling it earlier, I was happy they came.

  “All fixed.”

  Two words. That’s all it took to loosen the jaws of the vice around my heart. Thank you. I accrued some heavy debt with the big man over the past several hours. Debt I’d gladly repay. Hell, he could take whatever, whenever.

  Tack bent in half, braced his hands to his thighs. He wouldn’t have been any less of a man in my eyes if he upchucked right on the spot. Hell, I was tempted.

  Everyone shuffled around us, and the collective sighs of relief made Chase speak louder. “She’s in recovery, surgery went well, took a little longer than anticipated, but I was easily able to evacuate the hematoma, repair the damage to the vessel and stop the bleeding. The bullet was lodged in between some very important structures so the dissection to free it was time-consuming. She required additional transfusions and pressor support. Because of that, she’ll spend the next hour or two down here, and then I’ll move her up to the ICU. Once she’s settled there, you’ll be able to see her. All and all, she was very lucky.” Dr. Colton’s technical recap was fine and dandy, but I wanted more. I wanted details from friend to friend, brother to brother. And he knew it. “She’s good, man. She’s good.”

  Good.

  There was that word again, talk about full circle. Although, I wasn’t sure how I felt about that word anymore.

  “How much longer?” Yeah, seemed Tack and I shared the same page. Until she was in our sights, we weren’t feeling assured by anything or anyone, not even Chase. Tack was done. He was done pacing, done waiting. He was pale, hadn’t eaten a thing, and was visibly crawling out of his skin at hour four after Chase’s case manager came down to let us know how things were progressing, sharing a whole lot of nothing and only adding to the stress. Tal was probably going to kick my ass, but Tack was joining Dodd’s intro to the ropes when this was all said and done. She wasn’t kidding when she said he had an intensity to rival his brother.

  “Don’t worry, bud, he knows we’re not waiting. ICU my ass, what bed is she in?”

  Mid-eye roll his focus broke toward a young woman jogging down the hall. “Dr. Colton, we need you back in recovery now, please.”

  Leaving my question unanswered, his jaw tightened while he ripped off his sweat-drenched cap, locking his eyes with mine.

  So much for good.

  Whatever relief we experienced was gone and replaced with a new sickening foreboding. Something had to give. It was all too much. I clenched my teeth to stop from screaming. “Go.”

  The only question left to ask reeled my mind. But there was no time. He was already halfway down the hall. I let the thick silence slowly suffocate me as I stood and did the only thing I could. Wait.

  Shock

  Sensation changes

  T12

  Incomplete injury

  Motor strength

  Altered reflexes

  Sacral sparing

  Weeks

  Months

  Permanent

  Simple words, all with easily accepted definitions, yet when spoken as a stream of medical jargon they were fuzzy. In this moment they blended together and got lost. Not so much lost as buried somewhere deep. I wanted to bury them deeper. She didn’t need them. No one needed them. They needed to be eliminated from our vocabulary. I gripped my skull and cursed. Why? Why was this happening?

  “Enough!” I growled. I heard or hadn’t heard enough. “I need to see her. Now.” My heart was jackhammering and I was fighting for air again. The knife in my chest was making it difficult to breathe. Chase said nothing more.

  Behind a thin white sheet she lay flat on her back. Monitors beeped and chimed from all directions. People in varying colored scrubs, some with white coats, some not, busied themselves around us. The giant open room’s perimeter was lined with patient bed after patient bed. I leaned on one bed rail, Tack on the other. This time she didn’t lift her eyes and give us her beautiful smile. This time nothing sassy escaped her lips. This time her mouth was back to being covered by an oxygen mask. This time she lay comatose.

  “I just gave her something for pain to make her comfortable and help with the anxiety, it will probably be awhile before she wakes up again.” A quiet voice spoke to my back.

  “Pain?” Tack fired at her nurse. “Why was she in pain? Dr. Colton promised to keep her comfortable.” His choice of addressing Chase sliced straight through me. As much I felt it, Tack did too; it was the neurosurgeon who came to deliver the devastating blow. Chase was detached and factual, referencing literature and statistics. I got why—he was as gutted as me. But it didn’t mean I wasn’t waiting for my friend to surface.

  “She was having some nerve pain, but mostly feeling anxious. It’s very common after this type of trauma. We’ve given her the proper medications to give her relief. You can touch her, hold her hand, we just don’t want her body jostled too much.”

  Common. Nothing about any of this was common. My woman was not common. I white knuckled the rail and squeezed my eyes shut.

  “I’m okay, baby. Come … here.” Her raspy weak voice was muffled by the mask, but it was the shot of adrenaline my lungs needed to keep breathing and to shut down the swirling tornado in my head. That sound, her sound … it could have been lost forever. She could have been lost forever if the night’s events ended differently. But they didn’t. And she was here.

  Alive.

  Thank fuck.

  Her lids were barely open before they fluttered closed again. Tack reached for her hand that was struggling to free her face. “Let me help you. Relieved it’s over, Mom,” he sighed. “Love you.”

  “I’m sleepy,” she mumbled.

  “You rest. We’ll be right here when you wake up.”

  She fought her eyes back open and whispered, “I need a minute with Asher, honey.”

  Tack’s expression narrowed. He wanted to object, but instead he murmured, “I’m back in ten, Mom, I’m not leaving you.”

  “Thanks, bud.”

  Like before. It was just me and her. Exactly the same, yet completely different.

  I found her lips. I needed to feel her breath mix with mine. “Hey, you, welcome back. God, I love you.”

  “I … I … I’m scared.”

  The bile rose so fast I almost couldn’t choke it back down. Only other time she uttered those wor
ds was New Year’s Eve when I asked her to take a chance on me. She hadn’t told me the truth yet, so understandably she was nervous, not scared. This was different. Tal didn’t do this kind of scared. She was a rock. Tack’s rock. My rock. And now she was crumbling. And there was absolutely nothing I could do to stop this landslide.

  “I can’t move … I’m … scared … my legs. I’m paralyzed.”

  Time stood still.

  The pain was indescribable.

  I had felt heartache before, a cracking and splintering. This was a full shatter.

  Into millions of tiny fragments.

  For her.

  “Hey, hey. Look at me.” Her eyes were clenched but not tight enough to stop the tears from falling. I frantically tried to kiss them away. I wanted to kiss it all away. I wanted to promise her everything was going to be okay. I wanted to go back in time and tackle Roy Wayne to the ground before he fired that first bullet in the air. Screw the second, he deserved it. Hell, I wanted to switch places with her. “Shh … shh. I’m here. I’m right here with you. We’ll get through this together. I promise.” She sniffled, barely moving her head to nod. “Teeps, please look at me. We don’t know anything yet. We’ll wait, take it day by day, and do whatever we have to do. It’s me and you. You can do this, okay?”

  Her eyes finally crept open and her fear hit me square in the chest. I had never seen fear in her eyes before and it was crushing. She lived most of her life tormented by a mistake, but she overcame the odds as a single parent. She faced the hand she was dealt and rose to the challenge. She proved she was stronger. She was Tal.

  “Okay,” she mouthed before losing all ability to stay awake. She sighed one last time, allowing the medications to lull her to sleep. A sleep that would give me time. Time to process. Time to research. Time to figure out exactly how our lives were going to change. Time to figure out my next move.

  I had nothing but time. All the time in the world to wait.

  It was just before sunrise and she was settled into the ICU before originally expected. A perk of being on staff. We had more privacy here. It was quieter. Tal had a private nurse. And she was still comfortably sleeping. I stood from the chair and walked to the window. Practically on the top floor, the view of Boston Harbor was amazing. I was sure there was some type of bullshit survey that stated that the sicker you were, the better the view you should have. Ironic how they rubbed that beauty, that freedom in your face. I turned back around and scanned the sterile room. Only beauty here was my woman. The quiet rise and fall of her chest and the tiny spike of her heartbeat splayed across the monitor gave me the confirmation I needed to know she was full of life. But somehow the last image of her eyes was burned in my brain. That fear of the unknown, the angst wrapped in that one flicker was haunting. What would it take for me to erase it and show her alive again?