Working My Way Back to You

by Doreen Alsen

  “Where is he now? Did he come with you?”

  “He stayed with his mom back in Lobster Cove.”

  “Does he live with you?” A little bit of jealousy tinged her voice, but after Danny’s reaction to Cookie, he’d expected the same from her.

  “He lives with his mom in her house.”

  “Are you going to marry his mommy and be a family there?” And, yes indeed, the world famous Cookie pout blossomed on her face.

  “I don’t know. Things are all mixed up but I’m going to bring him down so he can meet your grandmother and you.”

  “Do I have to share Grandma with him?” Cookie adored Jeff’s mother.

  “Yes, but she’ll still see you all the time and love you all the same.”

  Cookie took that in. She looked up at Katie, who was standing in the doorway. “You don’t have to meet him if you don’t want to, sugarplum, not if it upsets you.”

  “It’s not going to upset you. It’ll be fun to have someone else to play with. He’s nice. You’ll see.”

  “Do you want to play tea party with me now?” She was obviously done talking about Danny. He shouldn’t push the issue.

  “I would love to! What kind of tea are we having today?”

  Cookie giggled. “The pretend kind! You’re so funny, Daddy.” She poured and handed him the tiniest cup he’d ever seen.

  He lifted it to his lips. “Delicious!”

  ****

  “I warn you, Jeff. I’m not letting you force Cookie to have a relationship with Beth’s son. He is not her brother.”

  Exhausted, Jeff rolled his shoulders to get rid of the pain in his neck. Time with Katie did that to him. “Biology says otherwise.”

  “And I will not tolerate Cookie spending any time with Beth.”

  “After what you pulled ten years ago, Beth understandably doesn’t want Danny anywhere near you, so it looks like you’re both on the same page.”

  Katie sucked in a breath and glared at him.

  Bulls-eye!

  “I’ve never lied to you. I did not call the Lobster Cove police. Beth’s crazy father did.”

  “Whatever, sweetheart. You keep saying that.” He looked at the elegant woman who’d betrayed her friend and almost sent him to jail.

  “If you don’t have anything new to say, I’ve got to head back to Lobster Cove.” He threw on his jacket and started down the porch stairs.

  “To her.”

  He knew her meant Beth. “Yes.”

  For once Katie kept her mouth shut.

  ****

  “Hey, let’s give this man a cigar!” Sally shouted as Jeff walked into Maggie’s Diner. “Congratulations! It’s a boy!”

  Jeff stopped in his tracks. How had word gotten around so soon? “Thank you.”

  “What can we get for you today?” Maggie beamed at him. “It’s on the house.”

  “Uh, wow. No need for that.” Seriously. Jeff walked up to the counter. “I just need a Moxie to go and a fish sandwich with fries.”

  “Haddock or flounder?” Maggie asked.

  “Flounder, I think.”

  “You got it.” Maggie scurried off to make his order.

  “So, how does it feel to find out you’ve got a ten-year-old son?” Sally perched on a stool behind the cash register.

  Jeff’s chest puffed up at the mere thought of his son. “It feels great! Danny’s a good kid.” And while he had huge issues with Beth, he wouldn’t let anyone bad mouth her. “Beth’s done a good job with him.”

  Sally nodded. “She has. She’s had to work so hard since her husband died. It’s terrible how we treat our veterans and their families. Now that you’re in the picture you can help her out.”

  Jeff saw red at the mention of Beth’s war hero husband.

  Beth’s pretend war hero husband. All of that was totally made of wrong.

  But not that he’d let on in public, because who dissed a veteran? Not Nancy Myers’ baby boy. “I’m going to do everything I can for my son.”

  Sally sighed. “Your son. I think you like the sound of that.”

  He smiled. “I do.”

  “Too bad the Sharks lost last Friday night at Stockton Springs. People got used to them winning.”

  “You shouldn’t count on winning every time, especially with a high school team.” The team hadn’t lost. Jeff didn’t have his head in the game. He’d let his players down.

  No more. Now that everything was out in the open, he had a plan, he wouldn’t be distracted again.

  “Here’s your food!” Maggie brought a takeout bag. “Sally, get Coach’s Moxie.”

  Sally sighed, reached into the cooler and clinked out a bottle. “Here you go.”

  “Thanks, Sally.” He liberated his wallet from of his back pocket. “What do I owe you, Maggie?”

  “I told you it’s on the house. You just make sure the Sharks win the next game.”

  “I’ll do my best.”

  Sally laughed as she brought his Moxie to him. “Give ’em hell, Coach!”

  “Thank you, ladies.” He had to get out of there. “And thanks for supporting the team.”

  As he left, he realized just how fast gossip got around in a small town.

  Chapter Eighteen

  “Thanks for seeing me, Father Zack.”

  “Of course, Beth. I’m always here for you.” He leaned back in his chair. “What can I do you for?”

  Beth folded her hands in her lap, but didn’t look down. She looked him right in the eyes.

  “Danny knows Jeff is his father. He’s overjoyed, of course. But Father,” she said, “Danny knows I lied to him and it’s a problem.”

  “As in ‘if you can lie, I can, too’ kind of a problem?”

  She closed her eyes, grateful for his gentle acceptance. “Yes.”

  “He’s mad at you.”

  Beth smiled. “Got it in one. He’s furious, really furious.” That smile melted off her face. “I’m a liar and Jeff walks on water.”

  “Jeff Myers does not walk on water. I lost fifty bucks on last Friday’s game. He needs to pull himself together A.S.A.P. before I lose more.”

  “You bet on children?” Her jaw dropped.

  “No.” Father Zack gave a rueful shake of his head. “I bet on a football game. There’s a difference.”

  “You’re terrible,” she teased. “Talk about splitting hairs.”

  He waved his hand as if to brush Beth’s opinion away. “No split hairs at all. It’s the same thing as Bingo, which, as we know, makes a lot of money for St. Joe’s. Which goes toward your salary.”

  His eyes twinkled. “And I lost to Ralph Sykes, of all people.” Ralph Sykes was a math teacher at Lobster Cove High who had stood in the way of setting up a daycare in another church for the children of teen mothers so they could stay in school.

  As a single parent and teen mother, Beth didn’t have much respect for Ralph Sykes.

  Truth to tell, she wasn’t quite a single parent any more. She had a real live, breathing, in the flesh, baby daddy who wanted to be totally hands-on.

  “Is he offering to pay child support?”

  “I’m not sure he can afford it. He says he can, but he’s obviously paying child support for Cookie. He can’t afford to support Danny, too, not on a teacher’s salary,” Beth murmured. Confusion and guilt swelled up again to drown her. “I don’t want his money, I don’t want his anything. I’ve always taken care of Danny by myself. I don’t need his money.”

  “You do work really hard but I know money is an issue for you. You should let him help financially.”

  “I just want him to love Danny and make sure everything he does protects Danny from harm.”

  Father Zack’s face remained a mask, interested, but void of opinion. “Is that your only issue?”

  Here came the crux of the matter. “No. I don’t want my son anywhere near Jeff’s ex-wife.”

  “Is she a bad mother?”

  She thought about the question, knowing that totally her j
ealousy and anger at Katie colored her vision of Katie’s being a good mother or not. She was angry with Jeff for not seeing through Katie’s bull. She was mad at herself for letting Katie stand in the way of her telling Jeff about Danny. Her anger had caused her to make some really bad decisions.

  Back to the question at hand. “I have no idea whether she’s a good mother or not. She blocks Jeff having his daughter visit him up here, according to him, because she can.”

  “Does she have a reason?”

  “Who knows? I don’t think so. Jeff is a good dad, I think. He makes sure Danny minds his manners. It’s all about Jeff’s gullibility where Katie’s concerned.” Beth shrugged. “I don’t trust my son’s welfare with her and Katie refuses to let Cookie visit here because of me.” She blew out a huge, cleansing breath. “But she is the mother of Danny’s half-sister. I just have this bad feeling about it.” She continued to look Father Zack in the eyes. “It’s most likely jealousy and worry.”

  “I’d be afraid if you weren’t worried and confused. Considering what she did, I think you’re right to keep Danny away from her until the situation settles down.” He shrugged. “But what do I know?”

  “I thought priests were supposed to have all the answers, all the time. Like 24/7, 365 days out of the year.”

  “We don’t. The best we can do is pray and trust God to lead the way.”

  Her shoulders slumped under what felt like the weight of a truckload of bricks. “I’ve got to make things right with Jeff and Danny.”

  “You already told the truth. The ball is in his court and he does have some issues to own up to and make right.”

  “I can’t even begin to make it straight with Danny. I tell him to be honest in every situation and now he finds out he has a real live father I never told him about, and a legendary father, who was just that. A legend.”

  She sniffed and looked for the box of tissues that usually sat on Father Z’s desk. She grabbed several of them, riffling them out one at a time. “He will never, ever trust me again.”

  “That is a problem.”

  “It’s the biggest problem. But I’m happy this is all out in the open. I just can’t figure out how to repair my relationship with Danny.”

  “Are you his mother?”

  What? “Of course I’m Danny’s mother.

  “Have you protected him and loved him all the days of his life?”

  “Of course. I made a deal with the devil just so I could keep him. I even let my father name him. Jeff got so angry about that. He says I shouldn’t have.”

  “Why do women always feel at fault when things happen beyond their control? I think Jeff needs to get over it.”

  Wow. “I don’t know. I just feel I did everything wrong.”

  “No you didn’t,” Father Zack said. “Everyone can see what good a job you’re doing to raise your son.”

  “From your mouth to God’s ears.”

  “That’s usually the way it works, with this priest thing I’ve got going on. But here’s the thing. You were abused.”

  “My father never raised a hand to me.”

  “Abuse takes place in many forms. Your father emotionally abused you. He took away your mother, who was also abused, by the way, and he took away your choices. Your power. He shut you down every step of the way and pressed you at every turn.” He leaned back in his chair and rested his hands on his considerable belly. “That’s abuse, Beth. It’s amazing that you are the woman you are instead of being a victim.”

  Beth hadn’t thought about being abused. She’d just called it her life, but Father Zack had brought up things she had to think about. However, “I still shouldn’t have lied to Jeff once I found out he’d married Katie.”

  “I can understand why you did. Does it make it right? No. But God forgives you.” He gave her the gentlest smile she had ever seen. “You have to forgive yourself and that’s the hardest part of all.”

  “I’m feeling guilty about deceiving Jeff, but Danny?” She shook her head. “That’s my worst sin.”

  “Would it have been better for him to know he had a father out there who didn’t want him?”

  “I believe Jeff did want him, but Katie certainly wouldn’t have.”

  “Didn’t you trust Jeff to keep Katie in check?”

  “No. He married the person who blew us up and I didn’t think that showed very good judgment.” Beth knew this better than she knew her own name. She sighed. “I’m stuck. I have no idea what to do any more.”

  Father Zack gave her an understanding smile. “Lots of lies going on here. Seems like forgiveness is the order of the day.” He leaned forward. “My money’s on you, but I’ll still pray for you and Danny and Jeff.”

  She laughed for the first time since her whole deception blew up in her face. “Can you put in a good word for me, then?”

  “You don’t even have to ask. I’ve got it covered.” He stood and came around the desk. “God forgives you without reservation or hesitation. Accept it and don’t give away any more of your power, because little sister…you are nobody’s victim.”

  Warmth grew in her at his words of comfort and his good advice. She’d already lost too much control of the situation. She couldn’t let any more slide out of her grasp.

  ****

  “So, Dad, do you want to stay for dinner tonight?”

  Jeff had decided he would drive Danny home from practice every evening. “I don’t know, champ. Your mother might not appreciate a last minute dinner guest.”

  “It’ll be okay. She always makes a lot of food.”

  He chuckled. “Famous last words, son.”

  “Really! It’ll be okay.” Danny paused. “Can you talk to Mom about letting me stop my piano lessons?”

  “Why do you want to quit?” He really didn’t believe in forcing a kid to do something he hated. He remembered the horror of finding out he had to sing in a freaking chorus way back in high school.

  “The piano is stupid. I wanna play football now. I don’t want to play the piano any more and she’ll never let me quit.”

  “Are you any good?”

  “I dunno. She says I am.”

  “Maybe you can play for me when I get you home.”

  Danny chuffed out a breath. “I guess. Will you talk to Mom? She’ll listen to you.”

  He snorted. He doubted that very much. “I’ll see what I can do.”

  Jeff remembered the moment he’d fallen in love with Beth. His heart had been hers from the minute he opened those auditorium doors at Addington High School and heard the music circling through the room.

  He’d managed to get himself on the ineligible list by being a real jerk in chorus. The teacher, Andi Nelson, now Mrs. Coach, failed him and his buddy and put them on the ineligible list, meaning they couldn’t play football until she changed the grade. The only way to get off the list was to jump through the hoops Andi Nelson put in front of them. Desperate to play ball, he’d gone to the auditorium to ask her for some extra credit stuff to do.

  Mrs. Coach wasn’t there, but Beth sat at the piano, lost in her music. He’d never seen nor heard anything so beautiful.

  He shook his head. He was lost in the past while his son wanted answers.

  “So please, Dad?”

  “I’m sorry, champ. What were you saying?”

  “Can you also talk her into buying me The Refractor video game? She won’t get me one because it takes time away from the piano and schoolwork, especially now that I’m on the team. If I can quit the piano, I’ll have time to play the game.”

  He used the eternal parental dodge. “We’ll see.”

  ****

  “Mo-om! I’m home!”

  Just the sound of Danny’s voice made Beth smile. She washed her hands and left the kitchen. Oh, and lookee here. Jeff came with him. She’d hoped he would just drop Danny off and then vamoose.

  Danny flung his backpack onto the couch. “I invited Dad to have dinner with us. He can stay, right, Mom?”

  Her gaz
e met Jeff’s. “Of course. But maybe he has other plans.” Please have other plans!

  “I don’t.”

  She whooshed out a breath. “Okay then. Danny”—she pointed down the hall—“you need to wash up before you come to the table. Face and hands.”

  Danny looked at Jeff. “I’ll be right back.” He ran to the bathroom.

  “Danny!” Beth called. “You walk, not run in the house.”

  “Okay!”

  Beth’s instruction didn’t change his speed. He ignored her.

  Again.

  “I know this isn’t how you thought the evening would go.”

  She took a deep breath and turned to face Jeff. “Really? What was your first clue?”

  He crossed his arms over his chest. “I want to spend as much time with him as I can. I deserve to spend this time with him.”

  “You keep saying that and I’m not trying to keep you away from him. I’d just like a little warning.”

  “Danny sprang it on me in the car and I couldn’t say no.”

  “You could say no. But you’re here now so stay for dinner. Danny will be disappointed if you don’t.”

  “I appreciate it.” He glanced toward the kitchen. “Do you need any help?”

  “I’ve got it.” She’d been working and cooking dinner for Danny all on her own for a long time. She did not need his help. “Why don’t you sit and relax. I’m sure Danny will be done washing up”—she looked at her watch—“about now.”

  Like clockwork the water in the bathroom turned off.

  Jeff’s mouth thinned into two tight lines. “I guess you know him right down to his toes.”

  “I’m his mother. He’s been the reason I got out of bed and put my shoes on every day and trudged on no matter what life threw at me for the last ten years, so of course I do.” She motioned to the couch and the copy of the Lobster Cove Anchor on the coffee table. “Why don’t you sit and read the paper while I put the finishing touches on dinner. I hope you like spaghetti and meatballs.”

  “Sounds good.” He took a big sniff. “It smells even better.”

  Whatever. She needed to get a little distance from him. “You relax. Danny will be flying down the hall any second.”

  “Dad!”

  “Here he comes.” She turned on her heel and went to the kitchen.