Don't Look Back (The Becky Chronicles, Book 1)

by Sienna Duncan

  Chad held me tighter.

  I touched his face with my fingertips.

  “I love you.” I whispered.

  Chad slowly kissed my lips.

  “Good night, baby.”

  “Good night.”

  I snuggled closer to Chad. I loved to feel the warmth of his body. I closed my eyes and quickly fell asleep.

  Over the next few days Lynn apologized for the confusion the night we met her internet friend in Birmingham.

  Honestly, I was trying to forget it.

  Chad was still kind of sulky about it. No matter what I said, he still was not completely satisfied.

  Whatever.

  Do you think my bestie learned her lesson about meeting men off the internet?

  Nope.

  She casually mentioned that “Garrett” stopped by the store. And she said he is hot.

  I was like, who the hell is Garrett? She didn’t like my attitude. BUT come to find out, she has been chatting with him as well.

  Ok…

  I mean, what else am I supposed to say? Good luck with this one?

  I was just getting ok with the idea when she said she told him about ‘pinkie.”

  Yep!

  That’s what I said! Her vibrator.

  I know… the one I bought her.

  From what she said, they have talked on the phone while she has used pinkie to get off.

  Umm… okayyy.

  Yeah.

  I still can’t get that visual out of my head.

  I just hope Lynn doesn’t do anything too reckless. OR get us into some mess with some freak.

  CHAPTER 6

  A couple days later, my brother stopped by for a visit. Now you have to understand something about my brother, Trevor. He was the star athlete in school and is the golden child of the family. Trevor is married to the equally perfect Claire and they have 2.5 kids.

  That includes their dog, Dexter.

  He can do no wrong in our parents’ eyes.

  It made me want to gag!

  We used to be close, but that was before he got married. I will give Trevor some credit though, he stays away so our mama doesn’t get the chance to meddle in his life.

  Lucky!

  So, you can imagine my surprise to see him at my apartment.

  “So, why have you decided to grace me with your presence?” I looked at him warily.

  Trevor touched his hand to chest. He was trying to act hurt. You notice I said trying.

  “That really hurts, sis.”

  I arched my eyebrow in response. He knew better than to jerk me around.

  “Whatever.” I rolled my eyes.

  He joined me on the couch.

  “Can’t I just stop by to see how you’re doing?”

  “Sure. But…you rarely do it. So, you understand why I am questioning it.”

  We looked at each other without saying a word. He finally broke the silence.

  “Between the job and my wife and kids, I don’t have much time for anything else.”

  I snorted.

  “Yeah…I’m sure you miss playing golf with your buddies on Saturdays.”

  Trevor sighed. “That sounds a whole lot like our mama.”

  If looks could kill, Trevor Stevens, would be dead right now.

  “You better bite your tongue. Hard.”

  Trevor laughed. He stuck out his tongue and pretended to bite it.

  Sometimes I wondered how we could possibly be related.

  “Don’t look at me like I’m crazy.”

  “But you are.” I laughed at him.

  He rolled his eyes and shook his head.

  “I’ve missed hanging out with you, sis.”

  “Me, too.”

  Trevor is only two years older me. You know I said he was the athletic one? Well, I was (still am) the exact opposite. Does walking count? Anyway…

  “Mom called.”

  Now, I knew the real reason he stopped by.

  “Don’t even go there, Trev.” I held up my hand to stop him.

  “Here me out, sis.”

  I stared at him in disbelief. Does he think I am that dumb? I can just imagine the things our mama has been saying to him.

  “I don’t want to hear it! She is driving me crazy. I can’t stand to go over there anymore, because she won’t shut up about me getting married. It isn’t the 1950’s for goodness sakes!”

  Trevor leaned back and sighed loudly. He rubbed his eyes.

  “Look, I know. But if I have to listen to it, then you get to. Do you know what she asked me to do?”

  I shrugged. “I’m afraid to ask.”

  “Yeah. She wants me to find out if Chad is going to propose to you soon. Our mother has lost her mind if she thinks I’ll do that. We’ve all been friends since we were kids, and I am not going to ask him shit like that about my sister. I told her he will ask you when he is ready. I know Chad. Pushing him to make a decision will only piss him off.”

  “What about me? She doesn’t care about my opinion at all. Our mother has a one track mind. Well, I don’t need a man to take care of me. I know it sounds ugly, but I’m not Mama.”

  Trevor shook his head.

  “I know you don’t need anyone to take care of you. I have been so proud of the way you worked through college and never asked our parents for anything. When you and Chad moved in together, I knew you would still be the same independent girl you have always been.”

  “Well, we both know if you ask our family for help it always comes with strings attached.”

  “Shit. Don’t I know it.” He laughed.

  Sad but true. It’s better to laugh than cry about it, too. When we were in high school and then in college, if we needed anything from our parents, we (at least me) always got a hundred questions. Most of the time, I would be told that it wasn’t something I needed. Well, no shit. I was teenager, I wanted more than I needed. So, I made the decision at the beginning of my freshman year of college, to get a job. Trevor had learned the hard way. I watched him go through it over and over again. They gave into him more, because he was the perfect child. Finally, he got smart and got a job his second year in college. So, yeah, we knew better.

  Trevor looked at me strangely.

  “What?” It was freaking me out.

  “Do you even want to get married? You used to say you’d never do it.”

  Well, hell. I was momentarily speechless. You have to know that NEVER happens.

  I cleared my throat. “It isn’t something I think about.”

  That was kinda sorta true.

  “Hmm…” That’s all he said.

  “What does that mean?” I turned my body completely sideways on the couch so I was facing him.

  “I don’t know. It just seems that ya’ll have been together for a long time, and if you wanted to get married you would’ve already done it.”

  “Oh.”

  Hmm…for some reason that did not put me at ease like it should’ve.

  Trevor looked at his phone.

  “Claire just sent me a text. Duty calls.” He chuckled.

  We stood up and I walked him to the door.

  “I’m glad you stopped by, although you were sent on a mission.” I grumbled.

  “I wish I had more time to hang out with you, Becky. You know that if you ever need anything, I am just a phone call away. Right?”

  I looked at him strangely.

  “Of course. Just as you know I am always here for you.”

  Trevor hugged me.

  “See you later, sis.”

  I waved as he got into his truck.

  I don’t know why Trevor’s comment was bothering me. But, what he said made sense. Chad and I have never discussed marriage. Ever. I’ve always assumed he will eventually ask, but I have never dwelled on it.

  We’ve been together for three years. I understand why people think we will get married. I just…don’t know how Chad feels about it.

  Ugh!

  My mama has managed to mess with my h
ead without even talking to me.

  I just need to brush it off. She wants me think about it, and I refuse to let her win. You would think she would want me to be happy no matter what. Who is she to say what that will be?

  My phone rang. It’s my mother. Wow! She doesn’t give up. Trevor just left, and she is already calling.

  Well…here goes nothing.

  “Hello.”

  “Hello, Becky. It’s your mother.” She still killed me with that.

  “I know. Trevor just left.”

  “Don’t take that tone with me, young lady.”

  At least she didn’t pretend not to know he had been there.

  I sighed loudly. “I love you, but you have to stop this. I can’t take it anymore.”

  “You are being so dramatic.” She was actually scolding me. Who does that?

  I groaned.

  “You always say that when I am upset, and it just isn’t true. If you don’t stop meddling, you are going to ruin my life!”

  She gasped.

  “Well, I am so sorry I want to see my only daughter settled and happy with a family.”

  I interrupted her.

  “Maybe I don’t want to get married and have a family!” I shouted into the phone.

  I heard the door to the apartment close. I looked up to see Chad standing there.

  “I won’t talk to you when you act like this. You need to drop the attitude.”

  I groaned again.

  “There is nothing else to say. I don’t want to hear another word about it. And don’t send Trevor over here in your place. He agrees with me, anyway.”

  “I’ll talk to you tomorrow once you have calmed down.” Her voice had become quite frosty.

  “Not if you are going to say the same things to me. Good bye, Mom.”

  “Well, good bye.”

  I growled in frustration when I ended the call. Chad was leaning against the wall with his eyebrows raised. I wonder how much of that he heard. Enough, obviously.

  “Hey. I didn’t realize it was time for you get home.”

  “You seemed preoccupied.”

  “That’s one way to put it. Just another fun-filled day.”

  I got off the couch and walked over to Chad for a hug. His arms immediately went around me. That’s what I like. I don’t have to tell him what I want.

  He just knows.

  Just breathing in his clean, masculine scent calms me.

  “I assume that was your mom.”

  I nodded.

  “I am so sick of it. I finally told her I didn’t want to talk to her if that’s all she wanted to talk about.” I looked up at Chad.

  He sucked in a deep breath before letting it out slowly.

  “And that you didn’t know if you’d ever get married.”

  He left that statement kind of hanging there, but I could see the question in his eyes.

  Interesting. Very interesting.

  I pulled slightly away from Chad.

  “I don’t know what I want sometimes. I know things can’t stay the way they are indefinitely.” I crossed my arms over my chest.

  When I glanced at Chad, I thought I saw a look of hurt or maybe uncertainty on his face.

  He backed up.

  “This is the last thing I want to talk about this evening.”

  Chad sounded angry.

  Whoa! Wait just a minute!

  “I didn’t say I wanted to talk about it. I thought I was answering your question.”

  Okay. So maybe I said that a little more sarcastically than I intended.

  Chad’s nostrils flared. He turned around and walked to the door.

  I followed him.

  “Where are you going? You just got home.”

  He stopped at the door.

  “Out.” Chad opened the door, and said nothing more when he closed it behind him.

  What the hell was that about?

  Grrr!

  I picked up my phone and called Lynn. She picked up after the first ring.

  “Hey, chick!”

  “Hey. Are you at work right now?”

  “Nah. Is everything ok? You sound a little off.”

  “It’s scary how well you know me.” I couldn’t help but laugh.

  “Well… you know. It’s a gift.”

  I needed that laugh.

  I filled her in on the conversation with my mother and the strange one with Chad.

  “Are you still there?” Lynn was too quiet on the other end.

  “Yeah. I’m just thinking about what you said. I’m sorry, Becky, but your mom can be a bitch sometimes. Nothing you do is ever good enough for her. And Chad…well, I don’t know about that one. Do you think he believes you don’t want to marry him? Think about. If he heard that part of your call, it probably sounded that way to him.”

  “Maybe, but he’s the one who said he didn’t want to talk about it. Then he just left.”

  “Do you have any idea where he went?”

  “Nope. He just walked out. That isn’t like him at all.”

  “I don’t know, Beck. But if you want to, you can come here and keep me company. I was thinking about watching a movie.”

  “Only if you ice cream.”

  She laughed.

  “What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t have a pint of double chocolate for you?”

  Now, that’s what I’m talking about!

  “I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

  “Alright.”

  After I ended the call. I noticed there was a text.

  It was from my brother.

  TREVOR: I heard about THE phone call. You need to give me heads up, sis. I had to listen to her go on and on. I had to promise her she is not a bad mother.

  ME: OOPS! Call you later?

  TREVOR: Sure

  I grabbed my purse and drove to Lynn’s apartment. She was waiting at the door with a pint of ice cream and a spoon. She handed them to before I walked through the door.

  “I so need this.”

  “Girl, I can tell. I got me out one, too.”

  I sat down on the loveseat and started digging in.

  “You wanna talk about it?”

  “Not really.”

  “Okay. We’ll just watch a chick flick. How about Serendipity?”

  I grinned. That is ALWAYS our go to movie. There is something about John Cusack that makes me smile.

  I periodically glanced at my phone to see if Chad called.

  Nope. Nothing.

  Could Lynn be right?

  Was he pissed because of what he heard? Or I should say, half heard. All I know is that it is completely out of character for him to just leave like that.

  Honestly, I don’t know what to do with that. The more I think about it, the more pissed I am getting.

  The movie finished and I still had not heard from Chad. I really did not feel like going home to an empty apartment. Call me childish if you want, but I hope he’s worried when he gets home and sees I’m not there.

  I really don’t care at this point.

  Actually, the more I think about it, I keep thinking what an asshole he is. This is a sign I am around Lynn way too much. I am beginning to sound like her.

  “I can get you a pillow and blanket if you want to stay the night.” She looked at me sympathetically.

  I nodded.

  “Thank you, Lynn.”

  “No problem.” She came back with her arms full.

  I took the blanket and pillow from her and placed them on the couch.

  “Are you sure you don’t wanna talk about it?” She raised her eyebrows in question.

  I shook my head.

  “No. I don’t think talking about it is going to help tonight. I just need this day to end already.”

  “Me too. Well, I’m going on to bed then. I have to open the store at 5:00 in the morning.” She grimaced.

  “Yuck.”

  “Tell me about it. Good night.”

  “Night.”

  I fluffed the pillo
w and got under the blanket. I looked at my phone again. How many times have I done that tonight?

  Too many!

  I closed my eyes and tried to get some sleep.

  I was still awake at midnight. I groaned out of frustration. There is no way I am going to call Chad. If he wants to talk to me, then he has to make the first move.

  My phone chirped to let me know I had a text message.

  CHAD: Where are you?

  Ohhh! So, now he can get in touch with me. Well, I don’t know if I’m ready to answer him.

  A few minutes later, he sent another one.

  Chad: Are you at Lynn’s apt? I know you aren’t at your folk’s house.

  Wow! Did he think I was going to act like he didn’t behave like an ass earlier?

  This makes me want to rethink EVERYTHING. He was being ridiculous.

  I heard the chirp again, but didn’t want to look at it. He can just wait!

  BANG!

  BANG!

  BANG!

  Someone was pounding on the door. Lynn came running into the living room.

  “Who the fuck is beating down the door?”

  I had a feeling I already knew who it was. I snatched up my phone and read the last message sent.

  CHAD: On my way!

  Uh oh!

  Lynn looked into her peephole and then turned around and glared at me.

  “Your boyfriend is here to collect your ass and he looks pissed.”

  “Shit!”

  She laughed. “I can tell him to go away.”

  BANG!

  BANG!

  BANG!

  “Please let me. I’m begging you.” She had that mischievous look.

  No way! She would get way too much satisfaction from it.

  “I got it. You go back to bed.”

  “Somebody is going to have make up sex tonight.”

  It was my turn to glare at her. She just laughed as she walked back to her bedroom.

  I opened the door. Chad flared his nostrils when he saw it was me.

  He and I stared at each other.

  “Why didn’t you answer my texts?” His voice was quiet, but there was an edge to it.

  “Why should I? You left without telling me anything.” I crossed my arms over my chest.

  Yes, I know it is a defensive position. I felt like I needed to hold onto something. I’m just as good as anything else, I guess.

  Chad made a sound. It almost sounded like a growl.

  Whatever!

  “Becky, I just needed to blow off some steam. It has been a rough day.” He raked his fingers through his hair.