Fallen Woman

by Stephie Walls

  “No, you’d be paid for your company. I can see what you’re thinking—you’re pissed but don’t be. Don’t be so quick to pass judgment, Gia.”

  “No. I’m not selling my soul.” I crossed my arms in defiance and glared at him from the opposite end of the couch. Somehow, in this short conversation, I’d moved as far away from him as possible while remaining seated.

  “Do you really think I’d put you in a situation like that? Damn. Believe it or not, I care about you and want to find a legitimate way to help you out of your circumstances…that’s safe. I know my friends, and I trust them. None of them would ever lay an inappropriate finger on you. They know how much I care about you and should fear my retribution if they ever tried.”

  The instant he’d said that last line, I knew he hadn’t meant to, but it also shed light on why he was propositioning me—unfortunately, not enough for me to decipher precisely what his motivation was.

  He pulled at his hair with both hands before dropping them back to his lap. “I just want to see you living like you deserve to live, and that’s not here.” He looked around at the stark apartment I shared with my three children. It stung, but I knew what he meant. I wanted better for them too, but at this point, I’d be thrilled if they were all healthy.

  I should’ve asked how much money we’d be talking about or gotten more details of what would be expected of me, but I trusted Jase, and if he said this was on the up and up, then it was. “Okay.”

  “Okay? Just like that? You went from stark raving mad to concession? What’d I miss?”

  I was smitten with him. I didn’t want to be. He had no clue my feelings for him were growing, and I’d do just about anything to see him happy. I couldn’t turn down a friend who was working within the confines of the restrictions I placed on him to help me out. And the truth was, spending time with his friends was a way to gain my own.

  Financially, I was in deeper than I’d ever been. If it weren’t for Miss Pearl, my children wouldn’t be eating. I still wasn’t caught up on the utilities, all the kids needed clothes and shoes, and the medical bills were never ending. Even if I wanted to be offended—and even if I didn’t trust Jase—it was the best option I had. It was the only option I had. “Nope. I trust you wouldn’t put me in a position that would hurt me. So I’ll go out with Drake.”

  I watched those gorgeous gray eyes stare intently at me for several moments before he reached into his jeans and handed me a cell phone and charger. He didn’t break eye contact as he held his hand out.

  “What’s this?” I asked, confused.

  “A way for all of us to get in touch with you so I don’t have to be your go-between.”

  “You mean be my pimp? Don’t I need to give you a cut?” I tried to joke with him, but he wasn’t amused. “You’re serious about this extending beyond Drake?”

  He chewed on the side of his lip and nodded. “Yeah. I don’t think you understand. Taking a date to these functions gives women the wrong idea, but going stag makes you available meat at the market.”

  As a woman, I’d never thought about what men went through being single, especially those who’re attractive and wealthy—I’m sure it could be frustrating to never know if someone loved you or your wallet. So I took the phone.

  “Everyone’s numbers are already programmed in and so’s mine. They have your number as well.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh at him. “You’re awfully sure of yourself, aren’t you, Jase?”

  He felt like an ass; it was written all over his face. “Just trying to help, Gia. Truly.”

  “You know not all women are looking for a paycheck, right? There are lots of good women out there who want a loyal companion. You guys are missing out by excluding the gender as a whole.” I fiddled with the phone in my lap and watched his eyes grow warm, the color changing from concrete to gun metal gray.

  He reached across the couch and touched my knee. “I know there are still good women out there.”

  I stopped myself from reaching out to grab his wrist. Hold his hand. Touch him in some way. I wanted to harness the heat in his eyes and transfer it to my soul—to connect with him further than this. But just as I drummed up the courage to reach for him, he patted my leg and stood up.

  “I’ll have Drake give you a call and let the guys know you’re in.” He turned toward the door, and I followed to let him out. Abruptly, he faced me. His sudden stop made me slam into him before I caught myself on his chest.

  His heart pounded beneath my hand, and for just a second, I stared at it rather than meet his gaze, but as my green eyes met the storm brewing in his, I jerked my hand to my side. I don’t know what he’d planned to say, but the silence hung heavily in the air. Jase leaned down, and I closed my eyes in anticipation, only to feel his lips on the top of my forehead.

  “Have a good night, Gia.”

  I opened my eyes to his back, as he retreated through my door and the twins flew by him, hollering his name. “Night, Jase.”

  Chapter Four

  I got a text from Drake shortly after Jase left. Having a cell phone was foreign to me, and texting proved to be a painful inconvenience. I wondered why people were slaves to their phones when I felt it was a wretched piece of technology. When I sat down to dinner with Miss Pearl, I stuffed it in my pocket and focused on those seated around the table. I loved seeing the twins happy. Trace had never had another little boy to play with regularly, and it was obvious Derrick had been lacking male companionship. Megan and Emmy took to Miss Pearl the same way I had—as if they’d known her their entire lives. Even when I was with Ryan, I couldn’t remember a time where I’d felt genuine happiness like this—or maybe it was just that I was content. Life wasn’t perfect, but we were mending.

  “Penny for your thoughts.” Miss Pearl smiled as she passed the mashed potatoes around the table.

  My eyes crinkled with the grin I gave her. “Just thankful.”

  “Mhm.”

  I hated when she did that. That guttural, knowing mhm was a “yeah, what else do you have going on in that brain of yours” kind of sound.

  “I saw Jase leave earlier.” She eyed me momentarily before looking back to her food and continuing to talk. “He’s a nice boy, Gianna.”

  “Yes, ma’am. He is.”

  “Does he have honorable intentions?”

  I almost choked on the food in my mouth. Her antiquated ways of thinking were cute, and I loved that she was protective—not just of me, but the kids, too. “He’s just a friend, Miss Pearl.”

  “The best ones always are, honey. Don’t be naïve. That boy ain’t hanging out ’round here ’cause he likes the ambiance.” She made a face I understood but went right over the kids’ heads.

  “What’s ambiance?” Megan asked between stuffing her face.

  “Atmosphere, sweetheart.” I never took my focus from our host’s face. “He’s not interested like that.”

  “Why do you say that? ’Cause he ain’t announced it to you? Maybe he’s a gentleman, Gianna. It’s possible he’s tryin’ to do right by you and treatin’ you the way a lady oughta be treated.”

  I hated to break an old lady’s heart, but the truth was the truth. “If he was interested, I don’t think he would’ve suggested I go out with his friend next Friday.” I’m sure she heard the hurt in my voice, but I tried like crazy to mask it.

  “Jase is in love with Mommy.” Emmy giggled from across the table. She’d been so tired recently—it was nice to see her animated.

  “No, sweetheart. Jase is just a friend.” I pacified my three-year-old and returned to Miss Pearl. “I hate to ask, but would you mind watching the kids that night? I can pay you for your time.”

  “No, I don’t mind, but you’re not payin’ me to watch ’em. I’m an old lady with no one to keep me company. I welcome the sound of feet runnin’ about and little voices fillin’ the silence. Plus, it gives Derrick company, too.”

  He and Trace were engaged in their own conversation, and neither of m
y girls were paying attention to me. “I’ve noticed Derrick’s been here more often. Is everything okay with his mom? You don’t say much about her.”

  Miss Pearl wiped her mouth and leaned back in her chair. I hoped I hadn’t pissed her off. I wasn’t trying to be nosy. “Trina. You remind me so much of her before she started spending time on the streets. You’re the mama she should be, but drugs got ’hold of her. When she’s clean, she gets Derrick more, but that’s been less and less frequently.” She smiled fondly at the little boy who never glanced in her direction. He was busy making mashed potato castles with Trace. “I’ll be danged if dis neighborhood is gonna swallow my grandbaby. He’s the only one I got, and I’m determined to get him a good education and get him outta here.”

  “Is Trina your daughter?”

  “Well, biologically yes, but the girl I’ve seen runnin’ around recently’s no kin to me. I hate the way she gets strung out. It changes her. Changes her roots. She forgets where she came from. I may not o’ had money, but she knows the difference ’tween right and wrong, and that baby is all that’s right.” She pointed to Derrick and resumed eating.

  I sat quietly, not sure where to take the conversation. As usual, the food was fantastic, even if we had all gained some weight in the last few weeks eating it every day. Nothing could compare to Southern cooking done right, but it wasn’t for those watching their waistline.

  “So tell me about this boy you’re going out with next week.” And just like that, her mood had shifted, and my favorite neighbor was back in full force. Her bright smile shone across the table.

  “He was at the charity benefit I went to with Jase on Friday. His name is Drake, but it’s not really a date so much as an escort.”

  She dropped her fork on the plate. The clang startled the kids into silence. She cleared her throat, loudly. “An escort?”

  “Not like that.” I rolled my eyes at her having the same assumption I’d had. “These guys are like Jase. They all have a ton of money. I mean a ton of money, and they get used by women looking for built-in paychecks, not loyal husbands. So Jase asked if I’d be willing to accompany them to different functions to help keep women at bay.”

  “No hanky panky?” Her words were stern, but I knew it was from a place of protection and love. In this neighborhood, women either turned to drugs or tricks.

  “No, ma’am. Nothing like that. I get a nice dress and get to go out to a fancy dinner. And he’ll pay for a babysitter.”

  She reached across the table and patted my hand. “Sugar, you need nice boys in your life. That sounds lovely, but don’t let it turn into something you wouldn’t be proud of. Understand?”

  Giggling, I give her hand a light squeeze. “Yeah, I understand.”

  Women got desperate around here. When you had kids to feed, it was easy to either get lost in the constant disappointment and try to escape it with drugs or try to turn a fast buck and trick to make ends meet. I’d seen it countless times with girls I grew up with, and with my own mother. She’d chosen drugs over me—it was easier to dull the pain than it was to find a way out. My guess was she’d likely overdosed at this point, but no one would ever contact me. Unless I went to find her, I’d never hear from her again. It had been years since I’d seen her and even longer since she’d been coherent enough to know who I was. It saddened me a little to think my mother didn’t know she had three grandchildren or even care where I was, but it was the way things happened in areas like this. That’s why people believed they were destined to stay here, and that’s why I needed to get my kids the hell out before it’s all they knew.

  ~~~

  I wasn’t comfortable with Drake showing up at my apartment, but there was really no other way for me to meet up with him. Taking the bus down to the Hyatt on Main and stepping off in an evening gown wasn’t exactly classy, so I’d relented and allowed him to come here, but with the understanding that it was meet me at the door and go. He wasn’t allowed to buddy up to my kids or meet Miss Pearl.

  He wasn’t Jase.

  His cologne welcomed me when I opened the door. His shaggy blond hair was neatly done, his face clean-shaven, and he looked quite dapper in his suit. We were headed to some fundraising event, but I wasn’t sure what the cause was or his involvement. I hadn’t asked a lot of questions, hoping to give us something to talk about during the course of the evening. And unlike Jase, he didn’t take me shopping. He started an account for me at the same shop Jase had bought my first dress so I could buy what I wanted.

  At first, I was a little hurt by the coldness of it all, and then realized this wasn’t Pretty Woman and I wasn’t falling in love with the handsome man. This was truly business only for him, and that was the way it needed to stay. So I went to the shop on my lunch break, and the same sales lady helped me find a gorgeous black cocktail dress and matching accessories. I tried to be conscious of the price tags and was lucky to get out for a couple of hundred dollars. When I’d mentioned the total, she told me there were notes on the account that I had an uncapped spending limit. She saw the dumbfounded look on my face but assured me I wasn’t the only lady in town with this sort of arrangement and to enjoy it while I had it.

  So I put it to the back of my mind, took my dress and expensive costume jewelry, and went home. I hadn’t thought about it again until I opened the door.

  “That dress is stunning, Gianna. You look fantastic.” Drake leaned in and kissed both cheeks before holding out his elbow. I locked the door behind me before taking him by the arm. The crowd around his limo startled me. I wasn’t expecting him to show up with this kind of fanfare and draw the amount of attention to us he had. But he took it all in stride and opened the door, helped me in, and followed behind me.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you’d be in a limo.” I was embarrassed by the horde that had flocked to his car while he came to my door.

  “No big deal.” He stared at my legs, and I was suddenly very self-conscious. I moved my hands to my knees in an effort to conceal them. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, Gianna. I apologize.”

  The formality seemed foreign. I wanted to hang out with the Drake I’d met a couple of weeks ago with his friends. “You didn’t. Is everything okay?”

  He fidgeted in his seat. “That apparent, huh?”

  “You just seem uncomfortable.”

  “Truth be told, I don’t really know how to do this.”

  “Do what?”

  His kempt hair suddenly looked the way it had when I’d seen him before. He dragged his hand through his locks, giving him an instant bed-head look that was adorable. When I giggled, he gave me an awkward smile.

  “Date,” he finally answered.

  “Then don’t think of it that way, because it’s not, right? I mean this is just two people accompanying each other to dinner with a couple hundred other people present.”

  “And you’re really okay with that?”

  “Am I not supposed to be?”

  “I’m sure Jase has pounded this into your head, but you really don’t understand. The women we know—the women who are around these types of events—this is a business for them, and I’m not talking about the fundraising. I’m talking about landing a husband.”

  I shook my head. “I’m not looking for a husband, Drake. I have three kids, ages four and younger.”

  “Exactly, who needs a husband more than you do? I mean look where you live.” Instantly, his cheeks reddened, showing how much he regretted the slip.

  I pinched my mouth together and looked at the carpet on the floor in front of me.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.”

  “It’s okay. You have your prejudices just like other people have theirs. I’m sure lots of those people surrounding your limo automatically believed you were a spoiled, pompous ass. Only way they’d know the truth is if they got to know you, right?”

  “Touché.” He cast his eyes down then met mine again. “You’re different, Gianna. You don’t get it, you
don’t see it, and that’s good. But the majority of women I run into are not you.”

  “If you haven’t given any of them the chance to get to know you, then you can’t say that with any certainty. Anyway, you’re not out with them, you’re out with me. So let’s just enjoy the evening knowing there are no strings attached, and at the end of the night, you paid for a service like you would a waitress.”

  “Right.” He grinned, but I caught a hint of something in his blue eyes—possibly sinister, although I couldn’t say for certain. They were an odd blue. They didn’t match anything else about him or his personality. The color was dull, almost lifeless.

  The limo stopped and the door opened, this time by the chauffeur. Drake exited first, then his hand appeared in the opening, and he stood very close as he helped me out of the car.

  “There are cameras everywhere and short skirts tend to provide shots that get women noticed…and not for anything worthy.” As soon as I was out and standing, he put proper distance between us and offered me his arm.

  He was right—there were cameras everywhere, but for the life of me, I had no clue why. These were just local businessmen, no one famous here. When I walked up the aisle created by black velvet ropes, I saw the sign. “Feed the Children.”

  Drake noticed my stare. “We each have organizations that are important to us, Gianna. Being entrusted with wealth means giving back—at least in my opinion. This is a worthy cause, and they do more with the resources and funds they raise than just about any other non-profit out there. Ninety-seven percent of their funds go toward their mission; they only have a three percent administrative cost—meaning the entirety of the organization is run by volunteers and donations. And each chapter keeps the money in their local community so anything raised here tonight will stay in Calhoun County.”

  I nodded my understanding and got lost in my head. I didn’t know the other guys any better than I knew Drake, but if they were all this fantastic, this concerned with their community, I wouldn’t be able to stop from loving every one of them…platonically, of course.