Prince of Hazel and Oak s-2

by John Lenahan

  We could have made it out of the Pinelands in one day but Tuan and Yogi decided to call an early halt. ‘The less time sleeping under an alder tree the better,’ Tuan said. I remembered the last time I slept under an alder – everything I owned, including my shoes, was stolen. I wasn’t looking forward to spending time in a forest full of them.

  ‘We are going to have to pay tribute to the King of the Brownies,’ Tuan said that night around the campfire.

  ‘Can’t we avoid Brownie Castle and just get to the island?’ I said. ‘I hate all that royal bowing and scraping stuff. And I’ve met the King of the Brownies – I’m not a big fan.’

  ‘As soon as we enter the Alderlands,’ Tuan said, ‘the trees will inform all of the Brownies that we are there. We cannot avoid Fearn Keep. Do you have anything to give the King for a tribute?’

  ‘Yeah, Mom gave me some gold, mined by Leprechauns from Castle Duir.’ I reached into my saddlebag and produced four slim pieces of gold imprinted with the Oak Rune. They were about the size of a candy bar. ‘How many of them should I give him?’

  Everyone’s eyes nearly popped out of their heads. ‘One will be more than ample,’ Araf said. ‘Put them away and don’t let any of the alders see that gold or you won’t have any to give.’

  Admittedly I had never had a good experience with the Brownies but it kind of bothered me how people talked them. ‘You know, guys,’ I said, ‘I refuse to condemn an entire race just because the first one I met robbed me blind, but it seems to me that everyone hides their wallets when they come up against Brownies. What is it with those guys?’

  ‘Brownies believe that the Faeries of Duir are pretenders to the Oak Throne,’ Tuan said.

  ‘Pretenders?’

  ‘Yes, they believe that they are descendants of Banbha and therefore should be the custodians of the gold mines of Duir.’

  ‘Banbha, she is one of the Three Sisters, right? Isn’t she the one that sailed away and brought the Banshees to The Land?’

  ‘That is the legend,’ Tuan said. ‘The Brownies believe that while she was away the other two sisters, Fodla and Eriu, forced a Brownie named Doran to take a Choosing against his will. He chose the Fearn Rune. Alder Island was created and the Brownies were banished to it. The Brownies believe that the reason the Alderlands are so swampy is because Doran’s heart was not committed to the Choosing.’

  ‘The Alderlands is an island?’

  ‘It was,’ Tuan answered. ‘When the Pinelands were formed it was joined with the rest of The Land.’

  ‘I still don’t see why they have such a reputation as thieves?’

  ‘Brownies do not like living by the rules of Duir,’ Tuan said.

  ‘What rules of Duir?’

  ‘There really is no such thing,’ Tuan said quickly as if I might take offence, ‘but Duir was the first Land. It has an army and it has all of the gold. There are no official rules but if a throne displeases Duir then life for them could be difficult.’

  I looked to Araf for confirmation. He shrugged and nodded yes. ‘So Duir doesn’t give the Brownies any gold?’

  ‘Your grandfather Finn was very tolerant of the Brownies. After he disappeared Cialtie was very generous to them and since then they have grown bolder.’

  ‘So let me see if I’ve got this right,’ I said. ‘They believe they should have all the gold, so they think it’s OK to steal it whenever they feel like it.’

  Tuan and Yogi looked at each other and nodded. ‘That would be an appropriate summation,’ Tuan said. ‘Even a Brownie wouldn’t mind being called a thief. They are taught thievery and stealth as part of their formal education.’

  ‘Well, that would have spiced up high school.’

  I had a quick face wash in a bowl of freezing cold water and stumbled in the dark back to my tent. Brendan was already in there. Now that Nieve was gone it seemed I had a roommate again.

  ‘Don’t you have a tent of your own?’ I asked as I got into my sleeping roll.

  ‘Why should I bother pitching my own tent when yours is so comfy?’

  ‘I’m like a big import of theprince, you know?’

  ‘Are you really?’ Brendan said in the dark. ‘I thought that was just a line you used to meet girls.’

  ‘No, it’s real. I got a castle, family sword, servants – the whole nine yards.’

  ‘Gosh,’ Brendan said, ‘you would think with all that stuff that you wouldn’t have to share a tent.’

  ‘Yeah,’ I said in resignation. ‘Speaking of girls, that was quite a show you put on up there in the Pinelands.’

  ‘What show would that be?’

  ‘The thirty-second movie-star goodbye kiss you had with my aunt.’

  ‘Oh, you saw that did you?’

  ‘They saw it from the space shuttle. You realise, Brendan, that my aunt is probably like a thousand years old.’

  ‘She doesn’t look a thousand years old.’

  ‘Well, I’m just saying, are you sure you want to get involved with a woman that you might have studied about in ancient history class?’

  ‘Conor?’

  ‘Yes?’

  ‘Shut up.’

  ‘I’m just saying…’

  ‘Good night, Mr O’Neil.’

  ‘Yeah, good night, Detective Fallon.’

  I had almost fallen to sleep when Brendan just had to get the last word in.

  ‘Conor, no offence, but if I was going to ask for relationship advice – I wouldn’t ask you.’

  I didn’t answer him. I just silently nodded in agreement.

  The flaps of the tent cracked with the morning frost. Tuan and Yogi weren’t happy with the dusting of snow. It made it difficult to choose the right path into the Alderlands. And being on the right path in the Alderlands is important, ’cause if you’re not on the path – you’re in a swamp.

  After about an hour, the Pookas found what seemed to be a solid trail. The only swamps I had ever seen in Tir na Nog were the ones in Cialtie’s Reedlands. I was not looking forward to going into another but once inside I was relieved to see that these swamps were much healthier than the foul and unnatural ones in my uncle’s patch. Still, it was spooky. Leafless alder trees draped with long catkins lined our path or lived alone on bogie islands. Even though the ground was white with a light snow and the sky was cloudless, the place still seemed to be darker than it should, as if the light was mysteriously being sucked from the place. Small black birds darted through the trees but moved so fast I could never actually see one. Around the edges, the swamps were frozen but in the dark deeper water near the middle, unseen creatures submerged as we passed – their presence only given away by a tiny splash or an ominous plop.

  The Pookas decided that someone should talk to a tree and let them know we were here. raf was chosen, since nobody has any real beefs with the Imps. He placed his hands on a burly alder for a few moments, said, ‘Thank you,’ and walked back to us.

  ‘She pretended to be surprised,’ Araf said, ‘but I got the impression that they already knew we were here. I told her we were coming to see the King and she wished us good luck.’

  ‘Was that like an actual “good luck”,’ I asked, ‘or a you’re gonna need it “good luck”?’

  As usual I didn’t get an answer from Araf.

  Essa pulled back and dropped in next to me later that day. I stifled the sarcastic comment about Turd-low. Call me genius but I was starting to realise that maybe one of the reasons Essa was so feisty was because I wound her up all the time.

  ‘I have to say, Conor, this is not my favourite place.’

  ‘First trip to the Alderlands then?’

  She nodded yes. ‘I’m not very happy about being here and neither is my father.’

  ‘Your father? How does Gerard know you are here?’

  ‘I have an emain slate with me.’

  ‘You do? Why didn’t you tell me? I could have used that to see how my father is.’

  ‘I have been keeping track of Oisin’s health. It is uncha
nged. I would have told you if it was otherwise.’

  I relaxed a little. ‘Mom said that he was getting worse.’

  ‘That has not changed either but it seems the progression is still very slow.’

  We rode in silence until finally I broke it. ‘So your dad’s not a big Brownie fan?’

  ‘Some of my earliest memories are of Father complaining about the Brownies not paying their bills, but I think this is less about the Brownies and more about me being too far from home. He worries about me.’

  ‘Well, I don’t blame him. I worry about you too,’ I said. ‘I worry about you coming up behind me and clubbing me in the head.’

  That one got a laugh out of Essa that was loud enough to make Turlow look around and wonder what we were talking about. I hoped he thought we were laughing at him.

  ‘Maybe I should get back,’ she said.

  I almost replied, ‘Oh, we wouldn’t want to keep the Turd-low waiting.’ But as she pulled ahead what I actually said was, ‘Give your father my best.’ Who says I have to be immature?

  The cold air and the rhythm of Acorn beneath should have lulled me into that hypnotic state that makes travelling hours on horseback bearable, but I kept being disturbed by my companions flitting around me. Finally I broke my personal reverie, slid between Tuan and Yogi and asked what was going on.

  ‘We are being tracked,’ Tuan said. ‘Can you not sense it?’

  Of course,’ I lied, ‘I was just asking you for confirmation.’

  I had a look around. I neither saw nor felt anything. ‘Brownies?’ I asked.

  ‘That would be a safe assumption.’

  ‘Have you spotted them yet?’

  ‘No, Brownies are very good at not being seen.’

  ‘Why don’t you, like, turn into a hawk and see if you can spot them from the air?’

  An almost growling sound came from Yogi. The look on his face made me think that he was about to hit me. Tuan didn’t look angry but I knew instantly that I had made a major social faux pas. He kept his eyes down as if embarrassed and said, ‘That would not work.’

  Even though I wasn’t sure what for, I apologised and slunk back to Araf. I told him what I had just said and asked what mistake I had made. He didn’t know but added how impressed he was that I could make blunders where no one had ever made blunders before.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  The Alderlands

  I didn’t bother looking for our Brownie shadows. If expert trackers like Essa and Araf couldn’t spot anything it was pointless for me to try. Also, from my experience of Brownies, it was unlikely we would get an arrow in the back – the real danger was getting robbed in the dark.

  I made Brendan pitch the tent that night. I was drafted into begging wood from an alder. I found a not too menacingly sized tree and placed my hands on it.

  ‘You have slept under an alder before,’ came a strong and unpleasant voice in my head, ‘but not in the Alderlands. You and… a Banshee slept under one of the lonely trees. Am I not correct?’

  ‘How do you know that?’ I said. ‘That alder was miles away from any other.’

  There was almost a smirk in his voice when he replied, ‘Perhaps we leave messages on the breeze. But where is that Banshee?’

  ‘Dead.’

  ‘Ah,’ his voiced echoed remorselessly in my head. ‘He kicked my brother tree.’

  ‘And for that he deserved to die?’

  ‘Did he? I do not know what he deserved. I only know that he kicked a tree.’

  ‘The tree had just robbed him,’ I said.

  ‘Robbed by a tree? How is that possible?’

  ‘The one who picks the lock on the door is as responsible as the thief that enters the room.’

  ‘A door made of wood perhaps?’ said the alder.

  ‘Never mind, I refuse to talk in riddles to you.’

  ‘You started it, Faerie. What do I know of locks and rooms? If you are plain with me then so will I be with you.’

  He was starting to give me a headache so I just asked him for some firewood. The branches above creaked and fell around me. I thanked him, then just before I let go I said, ‘Would you tell me if there are robbers watching us now?’

  ‘I would tell you, young prince,’ he said in a way that slightly reminded me of my Uncle Cialtie, ‘but would what I tell you be true?’

  That night we set a watch again. Tuan took the first shift. I sat with him until everyone had gone to bed.

  ‘Tuan, I want to apologise for what I said tod-’

  Tuan grabbed my arm and placed his finger to his lips to shush me. He stared up into the tree canopy and then as I watched, his head sprouted feathers and shrank into his collar. I had to almost stand up to see that his head had turned into an owl’s head. He leaned back and surveyed the treetops, then the feathers seemed to melt back into his face and his head popped up as before. He rubbed his eyes and said, ‘I thought I saw something moving in those trees. Sorry, you were saying?’

  When I could speak again I started with, ‘That was pretty awesome.’ Tuan shrugged. ‘Right, what I was saying before you turned your nose into a beak is that I am sorry for breaking Pooka social protocol before when I asked you to turn into a bird. It would be helpful if you could explain what I did wrong so I could avoid that pitfall in the future.’

  ‘You made no error, Conor.’

  ‘Yogi looked like he was going to tear my head off.’

  ‘Yarrow, or should I say Yogi as he is now known, helped raise me. He is very protective.’

  ‘I still don’t get it. What did I say to annoy him?’

  ‘He thought you were teasing me.’

  When I looked confused Tuan hung his head and collected his thoughts. Finally, without looking up, he said, ‘You once called me… what was the word? A super-Pooka. That implies that I am the best of my race, does it not?’

  ‘Well, even my Aunt Nieve said she’d never heard of a Pooka that could change into lots of different animals.’

  Tuan shrugged again. ‘I am not the best of my people – I am the least.’

  ‘Why would you say that?’

  He looked at his feet again, ashamed. ‘I cannot hold to an animal form.’

  ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘Just that,’ Tuan said. ‘I have studied the disciplines of all the animals and I can change into each and every one but only for a few minutes, after that, my Pooka mind always comes to the fore and I lthe form. I change back.’

  ‘But I saw you fly from a tree as a bird.’

  ‘I climbed that tree when I heard the commotion on the other side of the wall. I almost never fly. To be honest, I am afraid of heights, but I needed to get to you and your party in a hurry. I thought I could make it to the ground before I changed back. As you saw, I didn’t.’

  ‘But you saved your people.’

  ‘Not out of choice, Conor. I was saved from being lost because I am too stupid to hold onto a fauna form for more than a few moments. It is nothing to be proud of.’

  ‘But who separated the carnivores from the herbivores?’

  ‘That was me. I allowed the bigger animals to chase me through the gate and then locked them outside.’ Tuan chuckled to himself. ‘Several times it was a very close call.’

  ‘I can’t believe you saved an entire race and still call yourself “the least” of them. The council didn’t think so – Councillor Tuan.’

  ‘The council only instated me because of my mother. They think I am weak-minded and I do not disagree.’

  This poor guy had been living with this shame for so long, his self-esteem was almost gone. I was tempted to give him a hug but instead I punched him on the arm.

  ‘Ow. Why did you do that?’

  ‘Because you’re stupid.’

  ‘Oh,’ he said, looking at his feet, ‘I know that.’

  ‘No, you don’t. Let me ask you something? How many creatures can you turn into?’

  ‘I would guess two score.’

  ‘And e
very time you failed you tried again and learned another animal?’

  ‘Yes, I have been alive for a very long time.’

  ‘A lesser man would have given up long ago. You have shown determination and fortitude beyond any of your people.’

  He shrugged again – a habit I was determined to break him of.

  ‘You have to admit it.’

  ‘Well, I guess.’

  ‘You must be the hardest-working member of a race that was saved from extinction because of you. If I ever hear you speak badly about yourself it won’t be your arm I punch – it’ll be your nose.’

  The way he looked at me made me wonder if anyone in his hundreds of years had ever spoken to him this way. A smile started in the corners of his mouth and he whispered, ‘OK.’

  ‘OK?’ I said louder.

  ‘Yes,’ he said, standing.

  I started to stand up with him when he popped back down, grabbed my arm and shushed me again. Then he performed his owl head trick. When his head was normal-sized again he leaned in close and whispered, ‘Get Yogi. We have company.’

  I woke up the bear as casually as I could and then the three of us sat around the fire pretending we weren’t being watched. Tuan passed around a bottle filled with water that we swigged as if it was moonshine. Tuan patted Yogi on the back and then dropped his head on his shoulder in what looked like a display of drunken camaraderie. In reality they were making a plan. Yogi got up and staggered to a nearby tree to relieve himself and Tuan laughingly told him to go further away. When he was under the right tree Tuan slapped me on the back and whispered in my ear, ‘Are you armed?’

  ‘I have one of Dahy’s throwing blades in my sock.’