A Daughter's Dream

by Cathy Sharp

  ‘Oh, Matt,’ I said and sighed. ‘I do love you

  He tore himself away with reluctance. We had gone further in our loving than ever before, only just stopping short of consummation because we both wanted to wait for our wedding. But it was certainly getting more difficult each time.

  After Matthew had gone, I lay in bed alone, dreaming and thinking about the future. It was all so exciting. I couldn’t help hoping that Lainie would make up her mind to get married.

  She told me the next day that she had written to her son.

  ‘I’ve told him that I was unmarried and forced to give him up. He must decide if he wants to see me or not.’

  ‘I’m sure he will,’ I told her. ‘Why shouldn’t he?’

  ‘He might hate me. I couldn’t blame him if he did.’

  ‘I can’t see why he should hate you. He might feel upset because you gave him away, but he will understand if you tell him what happened to you.’

  ‘Perhaps.’ She looked doubtful. ‘I don’t want to hurt John more than he has already been hurt. We’ll see what comes from the letter. I’ve sent it now, so all I can do is wait.’

  Mrs Simpson came for her first fitting the next day. She looked at the dress with a critical eye as I made one or two small adjustments on her.

  ‘It will be finished properly inside, won’t it? I do like good finishing.’

  ‘Margaret’s work is very good,’ I replied. ‘We’ve never had any complaints.’

  ‘Then I’m sure I shall be satisfied.’

  ‘If you are dissatisfied with the finished article you don’t have to buy.’

  ‘Oh, I am sure I shall be. I love the way the dress hangs. That was a clever idea of yours, Miss Robinson. When would you like me to come for my next fitting?’

  ‘On Friday afternoon. I have someone coming in the morning, so shall we say three o’clock?’

  ‘Yes, that’s perfect. I like the drape across the front. Who did the cutting for you?’

  ‘Margaret and I usually do it together.’

  Margaret had done this one herself, but if there were complaints I would take the blame.

  ‘You are both talented young ladies, especially you, Amy. You should be working for a fashion house as a designer. You are wasted here.’

  ‘I’ve offered some of my designs to various houses. So far no one has been interested.’

  ‘That’s a pity,’ she said. ‘But it takes time for talent to be recognized. Perhaps you will sell something one day.’

  ‘Yes, perhaps I shall.’

  After she had gone I tidied up the dressing room. As I returned to the shop I heard a woman speaking. She was actually laughing in a rather shrill manner and I recognized that laugh at once.

  Jane turned just as I was wondering whether I could make my escape before being noticed. As her eyes gleamed I knew it was too late, and that she had come in with a purpose.

  ‘Ah, there you are, Amy. I was afraid you were hiding away from me.’

  ‘Why should I do that, Jane?’

  ‘You didn’t come to Paul’s party on Sunday. I was so looking forward to seeing you. Poor Paul was devastated. He held the party on a Sunday especially so that you could attend. Everyone was so disappointed.’

  Why was she being so friendly to me? I might have been her best friend. I could hardly believe my ears, but I knew she was playing a part. She had revealed too much of herself that weekend at Mary’s country house, and now she wanted to pretend that it had never happened.

  ‘I had a prior engagement.’

  Her eyebrows went up. I could tell she thought I was lying; though why she thought I should do that, I didn’t know.

  ‘My cousin and I are both looking for evening dresses,’ Jane said after a moment’s silence. ‘Sylvia liked the one Mary was wearing recently. She said it came from here.’

  ‘Yes, it did – but not from the rails. We made it especially for Mary.’

  Jane frowned. She obviously hadn’t been told that part and I knew Mary wouldn’t want Jane to pick out one of my designs for herself.

  ‘However, we can show you what we have in stock, and we’re always happy to make alterations.’

  I signalled to one of the other girls and she went to fetch the gowns I thought Jane’s cousin might like. She returned with three, which she displayed for Sylvia.

  ‘Oh, I like that green silk,’ she said immediately. ‘May I try this on, please – and the cream one you have in the window?’

  ‘Certainly. Ruth will fetch it for you in a moment. She will be able to take care of you and if you need a minor alteration I shall see to it myself.’ I turned to Jane as her cousin went off. ‘I can show you two gowns you might like, but neither of them are as individual as Mary’s.’

  ‘Show me what you have. Mary said the clothes here were reasonably priced and I’ve overspent my allowance this quarter.’

  ‘Of course. Please sit down while I fetch them.’

  I selected a very simple plain grey gown with loose sleeves that I thought would make Jane look slimmer, a dark-brown satin and, at the last moment, I picked up a frilly yellow silk gown with tiny cap sleeves. It wasn’t really suitable for her but I thought I ought to show her more than two.

  She discarded the brown satin at once, which was a pity because the thin shoulder straps and draped neckline made it particularly stylish and sophisticated, and the colour would have complemented her eyes.

  ‘I hate dark colours,’ she said. ‘That grey is so plain. I could try the yellow, I suppose.’

  ‘The grey would look wonderful on you, Jane. It’s elegant and beautifully cut.’

  ‘I’ll try the yellow.’

  She obviously wasn’t going to be guided by me. I didn’t argue but let her try the yellow dress. It looked pretty on her but it was too girlish and sweet.

  ‘No, I don’t like it,’ she said. ‘Haven’t you anything else?’

  I brought three more gowns for her to see. She tried them all and rejected each in turn. I fetched another three. The same thing happened every time. I thought perhaps she was being deliberately difficult because it was me, but I kept on smiling. We had been through all the gowns in her size, apart from the brown and the grey.

  ‘Couldn’t you make me something? There’s nothing put out of the way anywhere?’

  ‘I’m sorry. We have everything on show. Our order books are full at the moment. It would be a month before we could start to make anything for you.’

  ‘I want a dress for tomorrow.’

  Jane went back to the two dresses I had not yet replaced on the rail. She stared at the grey for several seconds.

  ‘I had better try this.’

  It fitted her perfectly, making her appear slimmer and enhancing her English-rose colouring. She was looking at herself in the mirror when her cousin walked in.

  ‘Oh, that is perfect, Jane!’ she cried. ‘You’ve been ages trying things on. I bought the first one I tried.’

  ‘I suppose it will do,’ Jane said grudgingly. She gave me a sullen look. ‘You’re sure you haven’t anything else?’

  ‘Not at the moment, though we are expecting some new gowns next week.’

  ‘I’ll have this,’ she said. ‘I suppose you know I’m getting married at the end of September?’

  ‘I knew you were engaged.’

  ‘I shall want a trousseau. I might buy some things here – if you were to show me your designs.’

  ‘I’m afraid I couldn’t promise you very much by then. But we could alter anything you bought from the rails. I could embroider a plain gown, for instance.’

  ‘Could you embroider this one?’ Jane asked and I groaned inwardly.

  ‘I could do a small design on this shoulder by tomorrow morning – if that would help?’

  ‘Yes, please.’ She smiled for the first time. ‘It was the embroidery that I particularly liked on Mary’s gown.’

  ‘It will be just a simple design – a flower stem or something, so that it looks rather
like a corsage. I haven’t time to do anything more elaborate.’

  ‘I’ll leave it to you. Mary’s dress was gorgeous. Everyone was raving over it.’

  ‘Come in tomorrow at about eleven and it will be ready for you.’

  ‘I’ll put it on account if you don’t mind. My father settles all my accounts at the end of the quarter – which is next month.’

  ‘I’ll speak to Miss O’Rourke.’

  Lainie listened as I told her what Jane wanted to do.

  ‘I expect it’s all right. I know of the family. They aren’t rich but very respectable – and that ring she is wearing must be worth a fortune.’

  ‘It is. I’ll tell you about it later.’

  Jane was pleased when I told her my aunt had agreed.

  ‘I’ll definitely be back,’ she said as she left. ‘And I shall bring my friends.’

  ‘You are certainly an asset to the business,’ Lainie told me after they had gone. ‘You must have wanted to scream, but you kept your patience, and in the end it paid off.’

  ‘Jane needed a new dress. I would be willing to bet that she had been everywhere else first. Besides, if I don’t please her with the embroidery she might change her mind.’

  Six

  Jane didn’t change her mind; she was delighted when I showed her the dress.

  ‘But that makes all the difference!’ she cried. ‘It looks like something from an exclusive fashion house now. No wonder Mary wanted to keep you a secret. Millie wormed it out of Mrs Holland. She will be green with envy when she sees my dress.’

  ‘I am glad you are pleased, Jane.’

  ‘Yes, I am. I didn’t think we would find anything when we first came in, but now I am pleased that we did.’

  ‘I hope you enjoy wearing your dress this evening.’

  ‘Yes, I shall. Thank you.’ Jane hesitated as though she wanted to say more but changed her mind. ‘I may see you at Mary’s this weekend. Everyone has gone tennis mad this last week or so. Have you been to Wimbledon at all?’

  ‘No, I’ve been working.’

  ‘Oh, of course.’ She blushed. ‘Well, thank you again.’

  It surprised me that Jane had been so nice. I wondered what she had been on the verge of telling me, and I was lost in thought as I went back into the showroom.

  ‘You look as if you’ve lost a shilling and found sixpence.’

  I whirled round as I heard the voice I knew so well.

  ‘Terry!’ I cried as I saw my brother grinning from ear to ear. ‘What are you doing here?’

  ‘I’m on holiday,’ he said. ‘It’s the end of term and I’ve been staying with friends, but now I’ve come home – so I thought I would pop over and see you, Amy. You’re all grown up. I hardly knew you.’

  ‘You haven’t changed,’ I said and smiled at him affectionately. ‘Have you seen Mum and Dad?’

  ‘They told me where to find you,’ he said. ‘I wanted to talk to you, Amy. Can I take you out to dinner this evening?’

  ‘Of course you can. I would love it.’

  ‘We’ll go somewhere special. Put your glad rags on, Amy.’

  ‘Have you come into a fortune?’

  Terry laughed. ‘Dad told me I can have a job with him until I go back to college. I might as well spend some of my wages on my pretty sister.’

  ‘You’re making me blush!’

  ‘I don’t see why. That was a pretty girl I saw leaving just now. A pity she’s engaged.’

  ‘That would be Jane Adams. She is pretty. I understand her fiancé is very rich.’

  ‘He must be to afford a ring like that one.’ He pulled a face.

  ‘It looks as if we’re going to be busy,’ I said as the doorbell went and several customers came in at once. ‘What time will you pick me up this evening?’ One of the new influx was Mary. She came up to me immediately. ‘Hello, Mary. This is my brother, Terry. I told you about him – he is going to be a doctor.’

  ‘How clever you must be,’ Mary said, fluttering her eyelashes at him. ‘What are you doing here?’

  ‘I’ve come to invite Amy out to dinner this evening.’

  ‘Lucky Amy.’ Mary smiled at me. ‘Why don’t you bring your brother to my party this weekend?’

  ‘I’m not sure – it’s a party on Sunday.’ I looked at Terry. ‘I don’t know if you will still be here?’

  ‘Yes, of course,’ he said. ‘I’d like to come to your party, Miss …?’

  ‘Mary, call me Mary. All my friends do.’

  ‘A lovely name,’ he said. ‘I shall look forward to the party. I’ll pick you up at seven this evening, Amy.’

  Mary watched him leave the shop.

  ‘I like your brother. He’s nice – rather attractive, too.’

  ‘Yes, he is nice.’

  It occurred to me that he was too nice for Mary and her friends, but I didn’t say anything. I wasn’t sure why I didn’t want Terry to become involved with Mary, but for some reason I was uneasy in my mind about it.

  I enjoyed having dinner with my brother that evening. Terry took me to a smart restaurant up West and I was shocked by the prices on the fancy menu.

  ‘You shouldn’t have brought me here. It will cost you a fortune.’

  ‘It will be worth it to take my sister out.’ He looked thoughtful for a moment. ‘Tell me something about your friend, Mary. She speaks like a girl from a good family.’

  ‘She is, I suppose. Her aunt is very upper class. I’m not sure about her father, though. Mary doesn’t like him much.’

  ‘Do you know why?’

  ‘No. He has been pleasant to me, and he’s always polite. He seems to care for Mary, even though she is sometimes rude to him. I’m not sure I trust him, though. I wouldn’t go into a dark corner with him, if you see what I mean.’

  ‘Yes, I think so. Be careful of him, Amy.’

  ‘He isn’t often around. Besides, Mary is very protective of me. She told him I was her friend and not his – and he seems to do whatever she wants.’

  ‘That sounds as if she knows something about him and doesn’t approve.’ Terry looked thoughtful again. ‘I liked her, though. Is she courting?’

  ‘No – although there is someone she is fond of. She can’t marry him because they are cousins and Paul thinks it isn’t a good idea.’

  ‘It can be tricky if the relationship is too close,’ Terry said. ‘Most of the time it’s all right – unless there’s already some kind of problem in the family.’

  I didn’t tell him that I suspected there might be. Perhaps I should have said something, but I let the chance go and then Terry said something that drove Mary and her family right out of my mind.

  ‘Have you seen Dad recently?’

  ‘Yes. I was there for lunch on Sunday with Matthew. Why?’

  ‘I’m a bit worried about him, Amy. He wouldn’t tell me what’s wrong, but I think he may be ill.’

  A cold chill went down my spine. My father, ill! I couldn’t believe it and my stomach clenched with fear. He was still a young man; he couldn’t be ill, not really ill.

  ‘What’s wrong with him?’

  ‘I’m not sure. It may be nothing or something.’

  ‘You wouldn’t have said if it was nothing.’

  ‘He doesn’t sleep, and I think he has pain in his chest.’ He reached across to touch my hand. ‘Don’t look so worried, love. It doesn’t mean it’s serious. I’ll try to persuade him to see a doctor. It might be just indigestion or something.’

  Or something! I knew that Terry was worried or he wouldn’t have mentioned it to me. It made me feel sick. I didn’t want my father to be ill.

  I’ll go over on Saturday afternoon when I finish work.’

  ‘Don’t make a fuss, Amy. You know he would hate that.’

  ‘I shan’t say anything. Do you think we should let Jon know?’

  ‘Not yet. It would be silly to panic. I just wondered if you had noticed anything.’

  ‘He did tell me he wasn’t sleeping well, but h
e seemed all right. I didn’t notice he was in pain.’

  ‘He wouldn’t want you to. I suppose I’m more aware of these things.’

  It hurt me to think that I hadn’t noticed my father was unwell, and I decided that I would go to see him as soon as I could.

  We were sitting in a corner of the restaurant by a window. Glancing up at that moment I happened to see a man passing by with a woman on his arm. The woman was Mrs Simpson and the man with her was Mary’s father. He tipped his hat to me and smiled.

  ‘Who was that?’ Terry asked.

  ‘Mary’s father.’

  ‘Why are you frowning?’

  ‘I knew the lady with him. She is a customer at the shop.’

  ‘Why should that make you frown?’

  ‘No reason. I was just surprised I suppose.’

  It was more than that but I didn’t want to go into involved explanations at that moment. Besides, I wasn’t sure why seeing Mrs Simpson with Mary’s father had disturbed me. I was more concerned about my father.

  ‘You will let me know how Dad is? If you can persuade him to see a doctor, that is.’

  ‘I’ll make him see sense somehow.’

  Terry changed the subject again, almost as if he felt that perhaps he shouldn’t have said anything to worry me too soon, but I couldn’t think of much else and the evening had lost its sparkle.

  My father had always been there for me. Even a faint possibility that he was ill was enough to distress me.

  It wasn’t until long afterwards, just as I was about to fall asleep, that a thought came to my mind that made me uneasy in another way.

  Why had Mrs Simpson been with Mary’s father? There was no reason why she shouldn’t be, of course, but it bothered me. I had thought the recommendation about my designs had come from Mary or Mrs Holland – not from Mr Maitland.

  I wasn’t sure why that should worry me, but it did.

  ‘How are you, Mum?’ I kissed her cheek when I visited her on Saturday and gave her the box of Fry’s chocolates I had bought. Then I looked at my father. ‘Are you all right, Dad? Up to your usual tricks I suppose?’

  I kept my voice light and teasing, because Terry had warned me not to make a fuss.

  ‘I’m fine,’ my father said. ‘Your mother has been overdoing things as usual, but I’m as fit as a fiddle.’