Every Breath You Take (The Every Breath Duet Book 1)

by Faith Andrews

  “Then stop being ridiculous!” I yelled back.

  He came closer, eating up the space between us in two long strides across the porch. “Nothing about this is ridiculous. You hate being alone, you don’t know how long your mother will be in the hospital, and even if some miracle happens and she comes home tomorrow, do you really like sleeping in a twin-sized bed and tiptoeing around like you’re still a teenager living under her roof?”

  Of course I didn’t, but that was a moot argument. I didn’t get the chance to make my case, however, because he was soon rambling on with his arms outstretched to demonstrate his point. “I just bought this big house and I have all this extra room. You could have one of the bedrooms to yourself and live here rent free. I make good money, London, and I have no one to share it with. I don’t mind having you as a permanent guest for however long you’d like. In fact, I think it would be a lot of fun.” Ardent fingers clutched my shoulders. Sam’s eyes teemed with passion as they penetrated mine. “In the past, so many things stood in our way of something like this. But not now. Now, the timing is right. It could be a new chapter, for both of us. Think about it?”

  Think about it? What was there to think about? This whole idea was crazy. It didn’t make sense. I mean, if I really sat and thought about it, it might, but there were so many things to consider. So many ways this could go awry. The first scenario that popped into my head was Bryce’s reaction when I explained that I was moving in with my single, gorgeous, male best friend.

  “What about Bryce?”

  “What about Bryce? You’ve known him all of five minutes. I’ve been in your life for almost twenty years. He has no claim on you. No one does.”

  “And you do?” My defenses were up. I knew Sam meant no ill intent, it was quite the opposite, actually, but he failed to see the big picture.

  “That’s not what I’m saying. I’m just—”

  “You just didn’t think it through!” I interrupted. “What happens when you bring a woman home and she bumps into me in the middle of the night on her way to the kitchen for an after sex snack? You think that’ll go over well?”

  Sam rolled his eyes, dismissing me. “You know damn well I’m not even dating anyone right now.”

  That roused a hearty snort out of me. “Since when do you have to be dating someone to sleep with them? You haven’t even been home a week, but I’m sure you’ll be back to your old antics as soon as you’ve caught up on your emails and updated your Tinder app.”

  “Tinder,” he repeated, making a razzing sound as if what I said was preposterous.

  It totally wasn’t, by the way. Sam had a five-star rating in dating app world, not that I had any idea how the rating systems worked on those things. Point was, he might not settle down anytime soon, but it was only a matter of time before someone—or more than one someone—was keeping his new bed warm and toasty.

  “Come on, Sam. Think about it,” I pleaded. “I won’t feel comfortable bringing Bryce here, either. It’s just not feasible. Even if my mother wasn’t my main concern, and I assure you, she is.”

  He let out a pained huff and shrugged. “Whatever, Debbie Downer, thanks for taking all the fun out of my exciting night.”

  “Hey, now.” I sidled beside him. Our shoulders touched as we leaned against the railing with our backs to the street. “I’m really thankful for the offer but I’m sorry. I can’t.” I pushed off the whitewashed wood and stood facing Sam. When he wouldn’t drag his eyes up from the ground to look at me, I kicked his shin.

  “Ow!”

  “Got you to look at me, you big baby.” I winked and smiled, hoping he would return the gesture.

  He didn’t but I could tell by the slouch to his stance and the shallowness of his breathing that he wasn’t actually mad at me. He was just annoyed that he was wrong and I was right. Such a man.

  “Come on. Be happy about the house and don’t sulk over something that was never a possibility.”

  “Never is a very strong word, London.” It was something he often said. A bit of clever advice. A warning. A foreboding.

  “Okay, I won’t say never if you stop acting like a kid who just lost his balloon. We should be celebrating, not arguing.”

  “Oh, you mean, you’re allowed to go out with me? Your new boyfriend won’t give you shit?”

  I scrunched my brows, an instant stress headache forming. “What the actual fuck are you talking about?”

  Sam pushed off the railing and started for the stairs. I followed close behind so I could hear what he was saying. “I know you were on the phone with him before. He’s keeping tabs on you. And I see how he looks at me when we’re together. Doctor Love is not a fan of Sam the Man.”

  He hadn’t called himself that in ages. I wanted to laugh but the heavy cloud of jealousy that hovered above us overshadowed all levity from the situation. This was insane. First Bryce, now Sam. This had been an ongoing theme since the moment I introduced them. I couldn’t fault Bryce, but Sam knew better. His sudden machismo kind of ticked me off, so I did what anyone else would do in this situation and biffed him off the head when we reached the sidewalk.

  “That’s twice!” He stopped walking and rubbed the spot where I smacked him. “You gonna stop hitting me or is that part of the new and improved, wild and domineering sex kitten act you’ve got going on with your man?”

  Wild and domineering? Sex kitten? Oh my God, he heard me talking to Bryce! My cheeks immediately burned and the shells of my ears sizzled with embarrassment. “Screw you, Sam. You’re just mad I wasn’t talking to you like that.” The stupid retort flew off my tongue without foresight.

  He stalked toward me, our noses a whisper’s width apart. “And what if I am? What if I do want you to talk to me like that? What if I want to hear you whispering those things in my ear while I jack off to images of you . . . of us together?”

  I froze. I had no words. No reaction. Sam had never said anything like that to me. I didn’t know how to gauge this. Was he serious? Was he joking? What the hell was going on?

  Luckily, I didn’t have to ask because he saw it. I was thunderstruck, a motionless creature in the center of a bustling world that made no sense.

  Even before he told me so, his eyes begged for forgiveness, the creases on his forehead and at the bridge of his nose displaying his regret.

  “I’m sorry, London. I didn’t mean to . . . I’m just . . . I shouldn’t have said that.”

  There was no need for an apology but his comment had come so far out of left field that the wheels in my head spun on an endless revolver of unanswered questions. I could simply demand the answers, but then again, to dwell on this would only make things more awkward. I took a deep breath and blinked away my confusion, wishing we could rewind to five minutes ago when things didn’t seem so . . . different.

  “It’s okay. Let’s just forget about it and go grab a drink. Are you hungry? I’m kind of hungry.” I wasn’t at all. I was actually very unsettled, my appetite non-existent. But I was sure this uneasiness would pass. Sam and I were best friends. We’d argued before. We’d gotten into fights and didn’t speak for weeks, then everything went back to normal as if nothing happened in the first place.

  Like most friends, we didn’t always have the same opinion and we had many differences. But in all the time I’d known Sam, I never had this pit in my stomach when he was close. I was never intimidated by his heady stare or vulnerable to his familiar touch. And I certainly never looked at him and saw what was staring back at me right now.

  Longing. Deep-rooted, unbidden, longing.

  I always believed the saying about truth spoken in jest. Maybe Sam was joking, trying to get a rise out of me, or testing my loyalty. But whether or not Sam was messing with me when he said he wanted those things wasn’t the issue. No, the true dilemma would be pretending he hadn’t planted the seed of possibility in my head.

  DEFEAT WAS NOT an attractive look on any woman. I didn’t want to succumb to it, but lately it was as if no matter
how strong I tried to be, something came up to test my resilience. Yes, things could’ve been far worse. I still had plenty of reasons to smile and so many things to look forward to. One of them was tonight’s date with Bryce. The carnival would be a great de-stresser, but my mind was elsewhere.

  I’d just received the call that my mother was being moved to the sub-acute rehab facility a few floors down from the ICU. I was at work and hated that I wasn’t there with her. Guilt strangled me, and that overwhelming feeling threatened to drown me once again.

  I drummed my fingernails against the back of my phone and contemplated texting Bryce to cancel. I had to get my priorities in check. Sophie would probably let me take the rest of the day off if I asked, but Kelsey was away with her family and the salon was short-staffed. I had responsibilities and obligations. I couldn’t keep ignoring them.

  Fortunately, Sam agreed to step in.

  “I’ll call you when I get there. Just relax. I already spoke to her and she knows you’re at work. She understands.”

  “But I should be there.”

  “You can’t be in two places at once, babe. I’m here to help you now. You don’t have to carry the weight of all this shit on your own anymore, okay?”

  It was quite a weight, that was for sure. But it was my weight. She was my mother. I wanted to be able to do more but my hands were tied, and Sam was right. “Okay, fine, but as soon as I’m done here, I’ll run home, grab more of her stuff, and be right there. Can you make sure to tell her that?”

  “I’ve got you covered. I’ll stay with her as long as she needs me.”

  I smiled, holding back those menacing tears that kept creeping up at all the wrong times. “You’re a godsend. What would I do without you?”

  “Ah, shut it. It comes with the territory. I know you’d do it for me if the shoe was on the other foot.”

  Of course I would. I would do anything for him. It was how I knew he wouldn’t mind doing one last thing for me today.

  “Sam?” I asked meekly.

  “Yeah?”

  “Can you do me one more favor?”

  “Anything.”

  “If you see Bryce, can you talk to him? I think he’s candy coating things. I’m sure he’s only trying to protect me, but . . . I don’t know . . . maybe he’ll be more frank with you.”

  “Yes, ma’am. I’ll see what I can find out.” Sam exhaled and I knew from so many years of friendship that he was scratching at the little bit of stubble he’d grown over the past few days. Unless he’d shaved it since last night, which suddenly made me contemplate how much I didn’t want him to. I liked how it looked. It was . . . sexy.

  Where the hell is this coming from? Oh, yeah . . . that seed.

  Ever since our altercation last night, I couldn’t stop thinking about what he said. Oddly enough, we made it through dinner without crossing that line again, but that was only because I danced around the topic by keeping him focused on the new house.

  I hoped that if I continued to avoid it, he’d eventually forget about it. But where did that leave me? I was still thinking about it. Still questioning all these unfamiliar feelings toward my best friend.

  Quickly shirking my current state of confusion, I ended the call before I gave myself away. “Alright, let me get back to work before I get fired. Thank you again, Sam. This means the world to me.”

  “Stop thanking me, but most of all, stop worrying. I’ll call you soon.”

  After he hung up, I shot a text to Bryce, telling him it might be best if we rescheduled. I tucked the phone into my work apron before he could reply and left the break room to get this shift over with.

  “I’m here with her now. I’ll let her tell you herself once you get here.”

  Bryce was disappointed that I wanted to cancel but he was very understanding. I called him as soon as I left the salon to let him know I was on my way to the hospital. He was okay with not getting together tonight, but it seemed my mother had her own gripe.

  “Tell her to stay home!” I heard her yelling in the background.

  “Is she nuts?” I laughed. “I’m already halfway there. We can argue about this in person.”

  “She’s quite agitated.” He chuckled. “You might not want to mess with her.”

  “And you might want to sedate her.”

  “You know I would never do that.”

  “What’s she saying?” Mom’s voice was further away now, but still coming through loud and clear.

  “Relax, Ella. She’s on her way. She says she loves you and can’t wait to see you.”

  “Liar!” I blurted.

  “Gotta keep my patients happy.”

  “Yeah, and what about me? Don’t you want to keep me happy?”

  “Of course.” He groaned. “That was my plan for tonight, but according to your mother, you’re being stubborn.”

  “As a mule!”

  “Damn, she has good hearing.” He was catching on quick. Bryce was mumbling into the phone, yet my mother could still make out our conversation.

  If she didn’t stop, she might scare him off altogether. “I’m sorry to burden you with this. I’m sure you have less annoying patients to deal with. Go take care of one of them and I’ll be there in twenty.”

  “She’s no trouble at all. I was on my way out, so I came to say hi and figured I’d wait here to see you.”

  “You’re too sweet. Thank you.” My heart warmed at the thought of him keeping Mom company in my absence. Which also reminded me . . .”Hey, did you talk to Sam at all while he was there?”

  He cleared his throat and replied, “Mmm hmm. Got him up to speed. He left about an hour ago to go to the transplant center.”

  “Oh, shit!” I slapped my forehead with my free hand, the other still gripped around the steering wheel. “I can’t believe I forgot that was today.”

  “Actually, it wasn’t. His appointment was for Monday, but while he was here I called the center to move some things around. I’m surprised he didn’t mention it to you.”

  I pouted, deep in thought. “Yeah. Me, too.” It was odd that he hadn’t at least texted me, but then again, I was sure he didn’t want to make me more apprehensive than I already was. I looked at the time on the dashboard and wondered where Sam was now. “You know what, I better call him to see how it went. I’ll see you in a few, okay?”

  “Sounds good. I’ll be here.”

  I thanked him and continued to drive until I hit a red light. I dialed Sam and listened to it ring. When he didn’t answer, it went to voicemail. He never listened to his messages, so I didn’t leave one. Instead, I hung up and decided I’d try again in a little while.

  Mom’s room on the rehab floor was much nicer than where she’d been in the ICU for the last few days. I moved about the slightly larger space, filling a drawer with some comfy pajamas and adding water to a vase for the hydrangea I brought from our yard. Big, round, pastel blooms that made her smile.

  “Those look lovely. Have you been watering them regularly?”

  I nodded, coming closer and kissing the top of her head. “Yup. I know how much you love them. I cut some for the house, too. They add a brightness that’s been missing since you’ve been gone.”

  “Aw, baby. Soon. I’ll be home soon.” She patted the spot next to her. I sat and grabbed hold of her hand.

  Bryce watched from the corner of the room, giving us space but smiling as he observed the exchange. “I’ll give you guys some alone time and be back in a little—”

  “No!” Mom shouted over my head. “What I want is for you to take her to that carnival.”

  “Ma!” I stiffened, gaping at her. “I just got here. I had a long day at work and I want to spend some time with you. Bryce and I can go the carnival anytime, can’t we Bryce?”

  “Actually . . .” He winced. “This is the last weekend it’s in town, but it’s not a big deal. We can do something else another night.” He winked in my direction and then dragged his eyes from me to Mom, who scowled at him like a cranky
child.

  “You heard the man and I’m standing my ground. I want you to go, London. I’m tired anyway. I had my fill of visitors for the day between Henry, then Sam, and now this wonderful young man.” She pointed to Bryce with a beaming grin. I liked that she liked him. Not that winning her over could’ve been that difficult. Mom was easy to please. But knowing that she approved of my new boyfriend set me at ease. At least one thing in my life was going right.

  Which brought me back to that daughter-guilt I couldn’t quite get rid of. “You know, I don’t have to be at the salon until three tomorrow afternoon. I was thinking of spending the night here with you, Mom. It doesn’t look like the bed on the other side is taken.” I peered over my shoulder and beyond the curtain that separated the room in two. “We can have a little slumber party. Wouldn’t that be nice?”

  Bryce remained silent but Mom stared at me as if I were crazy. “Who in their right mind would want to spend the night here when they could be making out with Doctor Hottie at the tippy top of the Ferris wheel? Come on, London. Get real and then get the hell out of here.”

  It was my turn to ogle the woman who claimed to have my best interests at heart. Was she for real?

  I snapped my attention to Bryce in hopes he would save me. But he seemed amused, so I gaped at him in disbelief.

  “Don’t look at him like that. He knows how I feel. You’ve been going nuts worrying about me. Go have fun! There’s nothing you can do for me here.”

  Bryce shrugged, standing speechless at the opposite side of the room with his hands in his pockets. My mother’s selflessness wasn’t unheard of, nor was her need to play cupid, but how could I leave her here to frolic around at a carnival, eating cotton candy and riding The Whip?

  But I could no longer ignore the weight of both sets of eyes on me, so I threw my hands in the air with an exasperated sigh. “Fine! I’ll go. Will that make both of you happy?”

  “Yes!” Mom and Bryce laughed in unison and by the looks on their faces, something told me they’d been conspiring against me this whole time.