Now Until Forever

by Karen White-Owens

  “Me, too,” Ryan admitted softly. At odd moments her thoughts had kept returning to Keir and the time they’d spent at Starbucks.

  Keir perched on the edge of the desk, facing her. “How did it go?”

  “What?” Ryan asked, finding his nearness disturbing, yet exciting.

  “Dinner with your family.”

  “Oh!” Ryan rolled her eyes heavenward, seeing her sister’s scrunched-up, dill pickle expression in her head. “I found it less painful than major surgery.”

  Keir laughed out loud. “Ouch. That bad?”

  Ryan nodded, leaning back in her chair. She loved the deep, rich sound of his laugh and wanted to hear it again. “Losing a limb might have been easier.”

  Chuckling, he muttered sympathetically, “Poor thing.”

  “Well, they’re family, and there’s nothing I can do about them. They treat me like a four-year-old. And honestly, it’s getting really old. It’s beyond stale.” She dismissed the incident, with a quick shake of her head. “I don’t want to talk about them anymore. Let’s discuss more interesting topics. How was your weekend?”

  “I had my kids. We enjoyed most of our time together. But, we encountered a few tense moments when I had to play the heavy.”

  Frowning, Ryan sat up straight in her chair. “What happened?”

  “I refused to take them to a PG-13-rated movie.” Keir folded his arms across his chest and jutted his chin out stubbornly.

  “I don’t blame you.”

  “Really?” His eyes lit up, and a smile spread across his face. “Thanks. It’s good to know I have backup if I need it. They wanted to see one of those action-packed blood fests with far too much blood, death, and bullets for me. So I told them no, and they were furious.”

  “What does their mother let them watch?” Ryan asked.

  Keir shook his head morosely. “A lot of stuff that they shouldn’t see. But I can only regulate what they see when they’re with me. I can’t take responsibility for anything else.”

  “I agree.” Ryan picked up a pen and twirled it between her fingers. “Your kids are twelve and five, correct?”

  “Correct.”

  “Neither child is old enough for a movie like that. No matter what their mother does, you have to follow your conscience.” She touched his arm, feeling the muscles respond to the light touch of her hand. “You did the right thing.”

  “That’s how I felt. Believe me, things were unpleasant for a while. But, I smoothed their ruffled feathers with dinner at IHOP. They love that place.”

  “Eww!” She laughed softly at him, enjoying the moment and his story about the trials of being a regular dad.

  “I’ll tell you, after a weekend of nothing but kiddie movies, television programs, and conversation, I’m anxious for some adult interaction.”

  “Oh?” Ryan’s mind raced. Where is Keir going with this?

  “Yeah, which is my segue into a dinner invitation,” said Keir. “Not IHOP,” he hastily reassured her. “Wine, dinner, and good conversation. Do you like Chinese? I was thinking P.F. Chang’s. What do you say?”

  Surprised by the invitation, Ryan rested her head against the back of her chair and studied the man. She didn’t know how to answer his question.

  Yes, she found him very attractive. The wild, frivolous side of her personality wanted to jump in with both feet and give this new attraction all the attention it deserved. On the other hand, her cautious side recognized the pitfalls in saying yes, considering their work situation and Glo’s warning. “Well ...” she trailed off, leaving his question unanswered.

  His eyebrows drew together in a concerned frown. “Did I get this wrong? I felt something between us, and I thought you did, too.”

  “Keir, what are you really asking”—she paused—“exactly?”

  “Food, a meal.” Confusion settled uncomfortably on his handsome features. “What do you think I’m asking for?”

  Treading lightly, Ryan tried to explain. “You’re a nice man.”

  “I hear a but.”

  “Look, I don’t know what you’ve heard about me,” Ryan began, placing her hands on her chest. “And I know some people are very casual and comfortable with their sexuality. But I’m not that type of person.”

  “I didn’t ask you for sex.”

  Embarrassed, Ryan felt her cheeks burn, and she refused to meet his gaze, while her hands fluttered in the air nervously. “I know. I’m just afraid that this will cause a lot of problems. I’m not into casual sex. I don’t want you to get the wrong impression.”

  “Wait.” Keir captured her hand and held it in his own. “Look, I like you. You’re fun and easy to talk to.”

  “Thank you.”

  Annoyance flashed across his face, and his tone turned cool. “I don’t want your thanks. I want you to have dinner with me.”

  “Keir, I like this job, and I want to keep it. I’m not available or interested in an affair, which could turn into an avalanche of crap.”

  Keir stood, and his green eyes narrowed and hardened. “I’m not a teenager with raging hormones. I’m a forty-two-year-old divorced father of two. And I want company. Adult company. I’d like to share a meal with a person whose opinion I respect. Someone I can talk to, eat with, and spend some quality adult time with. Besides, you owe me one,” he reminded.

  “What are you talking about?” Her lips pursed, and she stared at him suspiciously.

  “When we were at Starbucks, you said we should do this again. I’m calling in your marker.”

  Exasperated, Ryan opened her mouth to respond. That had been a parting remark, nothing more. And Keir knew it.

  He raised a hand, stopping her. “Ryan, you’ve been in this crazy business for a few years and understand how some directors operate. But it’s not the way I work. Am I making myself clear?”

  “Yes.”

  “Good.”

  She sighed, lacing her fingers together to keep herself focused. “Keir, I like you, too. Now, it’s my turn to make a point. I work for your production company. And I want to keep the reputation I have of being an upfront, dependable employee who doesn’t cause trouble. No entanglements. I come to work, do my business, and go home.”

  Keir leaned closer. His earnest expression made her ache to say yes. “I’m not asking you to jeopardize any of that. All I want is for you to share a meal with me.”

  She gazed back at him, realizing how much she wanted to take him up on his offer. Ryan wanted to explore the feelings that were developing between them. So much of her time was spent alone, and she missed sharing dinner and conversation with someone who had the same interests as she had. She was tired of eating alone, being alone, and not having any fun in her life.

  “I promise. This is about having dinner,” Keir assured her, with a persuasive smile on his full, sensual lips. “Dinner, good time, fun. I’ll have you home by eleven,” he muttered in a piss-poor Chris Rock imitation. “How’s that?”

  Shaking her head, Ryan laughed, then said hesitatingly, “It sounds great. But, what about Glo? She doesn’t approve of on-the-job romances.”

  Keir pursed his lips. “I don’t care. This is my personal life, not Glo’s. It’s got nothing to do with her or One Leaf Studio.”

  “That’s where you’re wrong. It has everything to do with my job,” she responded in a sharp tone. “I have to work for and with Glo. I don’t want problems.”

  “It won’t happen. We can keep our dinner plans under the wire. Between us. How does that work for you?”

  “Well ...” she hedged, wavering. Would one meal really cause that much trouble? Her blood froze when she thought of Glo and what she might do if she found out that Ryan had gone out with the boss. Dinner with Keir didn’t have to become a big deal, Ryan decided, dismissing Glo and her warning. She liked this man. If Ryan could believe what Keir said, she was safe. Slow and easy, that was the way to work this Keir thing. “Okay. What time?”

  He grinned like a kid on summer vacation. “Great!
How about eight? I’ll pick you up at your place.”

  Ryan shook her head, opened the middle drawer of her desk, and fished through the junk for a pencil and scratch pad, ready for directions to the restaurant. “You don’t have to do that. Let’s meet at the restaurant.”

  “No,” he vetoed, taking her hand between both of his. Her pulse accelerated as his fingers stroked the top of her hand. “I’m a man that takes his dating responsibilities seriously. I asked you out. I’ll pick you up.”

  She scribbled her address and telephone number on the pad, ripped the page from the spine, and handed it to him. “Yes, sir.”

  He pocketed the paper. Eyes sparkling, he stood, squeezed her hand, and then headed for the door. “Thank you.”

  Once Keir disappeared out the door, Ryan sat for a moment, reliving his brief visit. Dinner sounded like a great way to spend an evening. Plus, she really liked Keir. On the other hand, the danger of making a major mistake loomed large. Ryan hoped that she hadn’t lifted the lid on Pandora’s box and allowed one thousand years of misery to escape.

  Chapter 4

  Jade-colored walls and polished cherry wood furniture adorned P.F. Chang’s. White linen tablecloths and petite oriental lamps added a pinch of elegance to the eatery. The Chinese bistro represented one of the upscale restaurants.

  Escorted to their table by a blond hostess in a white pleated shirt and black slacks, Keir and Ryan followed the woman through the near-empty restaurant. With a hand at the base of her spine, Keir led Ryan across the hardwood floor. A mushroom-colored suit with a scarlet scoop-necked silk shell, Ryan’s outfit complemented Keir’s beige cashmere sweater and cocoa silk trousers.

  The trio halted at a secluded corner table. Keir helped Ryan into a chair and seated himself opposite her. For the tenth time, Ryan wondered what she had gotten herself into. Why put her career and reputation on the line? If Glo discovered the truth, there’d be hell to pay.

  The other part of her blew it all off. It was only one dinner. Plus, it felt great for her ego to be out with this handsome, powerful man who could have his pick of women. Keir had chosen her.

  The server approached their table. “Welcome to P.F. Chang’s. My name is Jim. I’ll be your server tonight. Can I start you out with a cocktail or an appetizer?”

  “Ryan?” Keir prompted. “Would you like something to drink?”

  She spread the white linen napkin over her lap, pondering the question for a moment before answering. “Riesling works for me.”

  “Any brand in particular?” Keir asked. He copied her gesture, tossing the linen cloth across his lap.

  “I tend to lean toward German wines. Is that all right with you?”

  Keir smiled back at her and accepted the wine list from the server, studying the selection. “We can do that. How about Mosel-Saar-Ruwer?”

  “Excellent choice, sir,” Jim complimented.

  Ryan nodded, absently drumming her fingers against the tabletop to the soft Asian-themed music playing in the background, while a hint of ginger and onions filled the air.

  Keir reached for her hand, held it in both of his, and stroked it reassuringly. Ryan’s skin tingled everywhere his fingers touched her. “Relax. It’s just dinner,” he said. “We’re here for fun, food, and adult conversation. I’m not expecting anything more. Okay?”

  His words soothed her. Ryan smiled back at him. “I know.”

  “Great.” Keir released her hand and began to flip through the menu. “How about an appetizer? Have you tried Crab Wontons?”

  “No. What is it?”

  “Crab meat mixed with cream cheese, garlic, and green onions wrapped in a fried wonton skin.” Keir ran his tongue across his lips. “It’s delicious!”

  Laughing softly, Ryan said, “You sound like a commercial. Are you on P.F. Chang’s payroll?”

  He shut the menu. “No. I happen to truly love Chinese food. Crab Wontons is one of my favorites. Want to try it?”

  “You’ve convinced me,” she answered, picking up her water glass.

  After placing the appetizer and wine orders, Keir returned his attention to her. “Now we can relax, enjoy our food, and watch the crowd.”

  With a skeptical eye, Ryan glanced around the sparsely occupied restaurant. “I don’t think we’re going to do much people watching on a Monday night.” She pointed a finger at the empty nearby tables. “Look at this place. It’s practically empty.”

  “Is that a problem for you?”

  “No.”

  “Good. Enough of my life is spent in the limelight. I crave privacy,” Keir said.

  “I’m not a woman that needs to be the center of attention.”

  “I’m not surprised. You seem like a very confident, self-composed woman who doesn’t want to be placed center stage.”

  “My privacy is as important to me as yours is to you.”

  The server returned with the wine, uncorked the bottle, and poured a small portion into Keir’s glass. After a quick sip, Keir nodded. The server filled their glasses and placed the bottle in a clay carafe on the edge of the table before quietly disappearing.

  For several minutes they sat, sipping their wine and taking note of the goings-on at the restaurant. As if he’d come to a decision, Keir put down his glass and turned to Ryan. “Here’s my suggestion for the evening. Let’s skip the awkward, getting to know each other phase and hop right into the personal stuff. Agreed?”

  Instantly, his suggestion hit a cord within Ryan and put her at ease. “Sounds good.”

  Settling farther into his chair, Keir admitted, “I hate all those forced silences while you’re trying to figure out something clever to say. Let’s just skip that. You can ask me anything. I don’t want there to be secrets between us.”

  Intrigued by Keir’s offer, Ryan lifted her wineglass and took a sip, stalling for a moment. “I’m going for it. How did you decide to become a director?”

  Grinning at her, he said, “Oh, come on. Couldn’t you think of something better than that? Like, what were you trying to say in the scene with Viki and Gary at the end of your last movie?”

  “No. I’m really interested in how people end up where they do.”

  “Fair enough. Did you miss the part where I’m bossy and want everything done my way?”

  Giggling, Ryan responded to his quip. “I have noticed. But I didn’t want to point out the obvious.”

  With efficient movements, Jim returned with a plate and deposited it in the center of the table, announcing, “Crab Wontons. They look great.” Keir served several star-shaped fried noodles to Ryan before putting a couple on his plate.

  “Did you always know you were going to be a director?” Ryan asked while nibbling on the food.

  “Yes. But I didn’t accept that fact right away.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I started my undergraduate studies in accounting.”

  Ryan’s voice rose an octave from surprise. “Really! How did that go?”

  He scoffed. “My spreadsheets refused to balance. They were always off by a penny or two. That drove me nuts.”

  “You’re a director at heart. What were you thinking?”

  “I wanted to make it all work out. I figured the easiest way to reconcile the problem was to toss in a penny and make things balance. Didn’t work. My instructors wanted to know where that particular penny went, and I had to find it.” Keir’s forehead wrinkled into a frown. “I hated that.”

  “Poor baby.”

  Nodding, Keir muttered, “I was. Anyway, that’s how I started out. I finally owned up to the fact that I wanted to direct and transferred to film school in New York. Best thing I ever did. What about you? Did you always want to do set designing?”

  “Nope. I started out with the plan to be the next straight Versace or African American Vera Wang.”

  “Ambitious. You still have time to make that dream a reality,” he said.

  “It’s crossed my mind. Anywho, I also went to New York for fame and fortun
e and an education. Instead, I found myself involved in set design for one of the soap operas.”

  “Wow!” Amusement flickered in the eyes that met hers. “Soaps. ‘I just fell in love with my sister’s boyfriend’s cousin who’s my secret half brother that my mother never told me about.’”

  “Something like that. It paid the bills while I finished college. The good part was my work caught the eye of Joel Collins, and when he started selecting crew for SWAT Command, his people gave me a call.”

  “Got you an Emmy, too.”

  Embarrassed, Ryan brushed a hand through her short hair. She always felt uncomfortable talking about the Emmy. “There’s that. Believe me, that nomination came as quite a surprise. And that’s how my career went from zero to two hundred overnight.”

  “Yeah. I know exactly what you mean.”

  “Let’s turn the spotlight on you. I’ll dim it a bit so you won’t feel so pressured. Talk to me. You’re the one with the Oscar.”

  “You thought you were surprised. I can’t describe how shocked I was. I hadn’t finished film school. Children in Brothels launched my career and put me on the map with the industry giants. Also gave me an opportunity to collaborate with a few of my idols.”

  “Like who?”

  “Spielberg, for one. John Singleton was another. My all-time favorite, Robert Altman, was the icing on the cake.” Keir’s green eyes shimmered with admiration. Ryan was impressed by his passion for his work. “That man can capture the essence of a scene better than anyone I know. I loved working with him because I learned so much.”

  The aroma of garlic and onions filled the immediate area as Jim put in an appearance with their entrees. Moo Goo Gai Pan with chicken, shrimp, and vegetables was set in front of Ryan. The server placed a covered silver tray in front of Keir and removed the lid, presenting a dish of crispy slices of fresh fish in a Sichuan sauce, decorated with stir-fried vegetables.

  “Dig in,” said Ryan as he scooped a portion of the fish onto his plate. “Do you want a taste before I devour this?”

  Her lips pursed as she considered his food, and then she reached for the serving spoon, planning to add a bit of his fish to her plate. “Sure.”