Now Until Forever

by Karen White-Owens

  “I’m doing great. Do you have time for a cup of coffee? I’d like to talk with you about the scene I’m shooting tomorrow.”

  Always cautious, Ryan gazed around the room, searching for her boss. She wanted to go with Keir, but they needed to be careful. There had been several near misses where Glo had appeared in a room when they didn’t expect it. Ryan didn’t want a hint of impropriety to touch her. Finding the area Glo Kramer free, Ryan nodded, and they started down the long, narrow corridor to the cafeteria.

  As they turned the corner away from the set, Ryan found herself instantly swept into Keir’s arms. Loving the feel of his strong, hard body against hers, she caressed the strong column of his neck while he nibbled on hers. “I’m having an attack of Ryan withdrawals,” he joked, licking the side of her neck. Her knees went weak. “I need sustenance.”

  Sanity returned when Ryan opened her eyes, noting how the corridor opened into a large hallway, where anyone could happen upon them in this compromising position. She stiffened, hunching her shoulders as she pushed at his chest and hissing, “Stop!”

  He lifted his head and gazed around, drawing her closer. “Nobody’s here. Don’t worry.”

  “We don’t know who’s around the corner,” Ryan whispered frantically, fighting to get out of his embrace. “We agreed. No messing around on the job.”

  Eyes narrowing, Keir dropped his arms to his sides. “Nobody cares.” The husky tone he normally used carried a frustrated edge.

  Ryan continued down the corridor. “I care. People love gossip. Keir, think about it. You’re the boss. Everyone wants to know the intimate details of your life.”

  Forehead wrinkled into a frown, Keir followed at a slower pace. The pair halted inside the cafeteria door. Glo sat at one of the long cafeteria-style tables, with a cup of coffee and a batch of sketches in front of her. Ryan shot Keir an “I told you” glare before heading to the set director’s table. Hearing them approach, Glo lifted her head, examining Ryan and then focusing on Keir. A hint of suspicion burned bright in her blue eyes. It was quickly extinguished, replaced by a huge, friendly grin. “Hey, you two.”

  Keir guided Ryan to where Glo sat. “Do you want a cup of coffee, Glo?” he asked.

  “No thanks.” Glo lifted her paper cup. “I still have half a cup left.”

  Nodding, he headed to the vending machines and returned with a cup of coffee in each hand. He glanced at Ryan. The expression in his eyes said, “See. I’m trying to work with you.”

  “What are you up to?” Keir asked as he handed a cup to Ryan and then took the empty space next to Glo.

  “Sketches for episode thirteen,” replied Glo.

  “Don’t you have an office for this?” asked Keir.

  “Yeah, I do. But, there’s more room to spread out in here. Plus, most times it’s quiet. No phones or people asking questions.” Glo glanced at Ryan, with an inquiring gleam in her sharp gaze. “How’s the set coming?”

  Uncomfortable, Ryan shifted on the park-style navy bench. “We’re all done.” She jabbed a thumb in Keir’s direction. “Mr. Southhall invited me for a cup of coffee to discuss tomorrow’s sets.”

  “Excellent,” said Glo. Nodding, Glo returned to the work in front of her.

  Ryan glanced at Keir. Now that they had arrived here, what exactly were they going to discuss?

  Glo reached inside her portfolio and withdrew an embossed envelope. “I received this in the mail this morning. It’s nice. I think it’s a good idea.”

  Keir hunched his shoulders. “You know me. I always want people to know how much I appreciate their efforts. I told Phil that I wanted to do something big after we got episode eleven completed.”

  Glo removed the invitation and read the printed card. “The Hyatt. Elegant. Ryan, I know you’re new to our little family here, but you should come. Get yourself a date, and have a good time.”

  “Yeah. You should bring a date,” Keir parroted.

  Where’s mine? Ryan wondered silently. “I’ll think about it,” she hedged, giving Keir the evil eye.

  Glo glanced at her watch and then rose from the table. “Excuse me. It’s time for me to move on. Phil and I are meeting at three. I’ll see you guys later.”

  Ryan sipped her coffee as Glo packed up her stuff and left the room.

  Keir turned his attention to her. “I held off on sending your invitation because I wanted to talk to you about it first. And now that Glo brought it up, this is a good time to discuss the Hyatt party.”

  “What about it?”

  “I want you to go to the celebration with me.”

  Ryan drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. She didn’t want to have this conversation. “Keir, I can’t do that.”

  “Why not?”

  “What do you mean, ‘why not?’ I thought we agreed to keep our relationship away from the gossipmongers. I can’t jeopardize my career.”

  “Nobody said you had to.”

  Annoyed, Ryan shut her eyes, reaching for a way to describe her fears. Facing him, she said, “Keir, I really like being with you. But my career is very important to me. Just like yours is to you. When we started seeing each other, you agreed to stay low-key. Now you want to change the rules.”

  “You are right,” Keir said, taking her hand. “I did agree. But, I also said we’d revisit this subject if things changed. That’s happened and we’re revisiting.”

  “Don’t!” Panicked, Ryan shook off his hand and placed hers in her lap.

  Frustration was etched into his normally pleasant features. He grabbed her hand and held it tightly. “The situation has changed. Our situation is different. I’m not going to pretend anymore. Why should we act like teenagers worried about how our friends and parents will react? This isn’t Romeo and Juliet. We’re too damn old to play games, and I don’t live that way. And I’m not going to.”

  “I can’t do this.”

  “Sure, you can. Look, I appreciate how important your job is to you. I understand. Truly, I do. But you and I can’t go on this way.”

  “Keir, you have nothing to lose. The big producer/ director. Your reputation will be fine regardless of what happens. I, on the other hand, have to think about my next job. What they think of me. What they have heard about me.”

  “That’s not true, Ryan.”

  She shook her head and said, “Maybe we should quit before things go too far.”

  “Now you’re running from your feelings. Is Glo that scary?”

  “No. She’s not,” Ryan replied.

  “Are you afraid she’ll fire you? Because the studio is a business, and you’re under contract.”

  “No, but—”

  “Then what is it? I’m not feeling you right now.” Keir swallowed a mouthful of coffee and then demanded, “Help me understand.”

  “I am afraid of what gossip may do to my career. Maybe I was wrong to think I could have a relationship on the job and work for you, too.”

  “Stop. Stop. Stop. You are blowing this way out of proportion. I’m not saying you have to confess before the preacher on Sunday. It’s time for you to decide what you want.” His voice dropped to a husky purr that melted her insides like butter over a hot burner. “There’s nothing in the rule book that states you have to choose between me and your job. You can have both. Me and your career. Just take a stand on what’s important to you.”

  “Glo,” Ryan mumbled.

  “Ryan, look at me,” he demanded.

  She lifted her head and looked directly at him, letting Keir see the confusion and worry in her eyes.

  “Ry, our relationship doesn’t concern Glo. She’s not part of it. This is about you and me. Us. Ask yourself a question. Do you want to be with me? Someone would have found out eventually. That’s the way things happen. You can’t keep a secret like this hidden forever.”

  She sat silently, taking in everything he said.

  “I can’t make your decision for you,” he continued. “But I have to be honest with you. I care deeply for y
ou, and I want you in my life. You have to accept we are involved in an adult relationship, and we’re moving toward the next step.” He rose from the table, dumped his cup in the trash, and left the room, leaving her to contemplate his parting shot.

  Her mind swirled with a mass of conflicting images. What was she doing? Did she really want to be the subject of her coworkers’ bathroom and dinnertime gossip? And Glo. How would she react? What would she do? Ryan didn’t see that situation working out like the happy endings on the last frame of some movies.

  On the other hand, the past three weeks had been the happiest in her life since Galen died. Did she want to return to the sterile, lonely existence she called a life before Keir swept her into his world?

  Keir brought fun, a good time, and laughter into Ryan’s life. The muscles tightened at the base of her neck when she thought of exposing her private life to the entertainment industry. Could she truly have them both? Keir and her career? The only way to find out was to go for it.

  Tony’s old slogan popped into her head. No guts, no glory. Ryan wasn’t a coward, although her behavior recently had made her feel and act like one. If it didn’t work out, she’d find a way to wiggle out of her contract and move on. First, she needed to give this relationship the chance it deserved.

  Chapter 7

  Ryan gazed at the stars bathing the deep purple hues of the sky as they made their way to the Hyatt West Hollywood. Keir sat behind the wheel of the car, weaving in and out of traffic like a NASCAR driver headed for the finish line. As they sped along Sunset Boulevard, the fifteen-story hotel loomed on the horizon, large and foreboding. Ensconced in the passenger seat of the white Corvette, Ryan silently admired the efficient manner in which Keir handled the powerful car, while listening to Kenny G’s mellow saxophone tune.

  Keir took his eyes off the road and glanced Ryan’s way. She knew what he saw. A woman nervously pleating the hem of her dress. He lifted a hand from the steering wheel, placed it on top of Ryan’s hands, and squeezed reassuringly, effectively putting an end to her fidgeting. “Relax.”

  “I can’t.”

  He returned his attention to the road before adding, “Yes, you can. It’s only dinner with people you already know.”

  “That’s easy for you to say.”

  “No. It’s not. I don’t like seeing you so upset. This is a celebration, and we’re here to have fun.” He grinned, running an admiring eye over her. Ryan felt flattered by the appreciative gleam in his gaze. “Besides, you look too good to worry about what others may think. Mrs. Mitchell, it’ll all work out.”

  “Aren’t you the optimist, Mr. Southhall.”

  He bowed his head slightly. “Only where you’re concerned.”

  Gently smiling at her date, Ryan felt confident in her decision to attend the party, but uncomfortable with the whole idea of divulging their relationship, their brand-new relationship, to the employees of One Leaf Studio. At times the gossipers were brutal, and what they didn’t know, they enjoyed making up. Ryan dreaded exposing her life to the public eye.

  Keir brought the Corvette to a roaring halt at the valet booth, climbed out, and then tossed the keys to the uniformed attendant. A second employee opened Ryan’s door and extended a helping hand. She accepted it, swung her legs from the bucket seat, rose, and stood at the hotel entrance as Keir strolled purposefully around the hood and stopped at her side. With easy grace, he slid his fingers between Ryan’s and steered her through the sliding doors and into the Hyatt’s lobby.

  The urge to run like a scared rabbit filled her. Come on, girl. You made your choice. Now live with it.

  Ryan’s fingers fluttered around the gold clasp of her evening bag, betraying her nervousness. She found it impossible to let go of the idea that attending this party as Keir’s date amounted to professional suicide. More concerned about her career than she’d ever been in her life, Ryan ignored her fears and walked purposefully at Keir’s side.

  From this point forward, their lives would be intertwined. Everything would change. Ryan acknowledged her job was secure. But, what she currently worried over was the way her friend’s and colleague’s attitudes might change. After all, Keir owned and ran One Leaf Studio.

  Interaction with her colleagues was bound to change and Ryan didn’t want that. Plus, she didn’t want to create a reputation of sleeping around. She liked her quiet, unassuming image and blending into the woodwork made it easier for her to do her job.

  They crossed the vast, elaborate reception area and stepped into the waiting elevator. Keir punched the button for the Sunset Ballroom before leaning against the opposite wall.

  For the second time she felt his admiring green gaze slide over her small frame like a light caress of his fingers, causing her to grow warm all over. Dressed in a scarlet spaghetti strapped dress with a tightly fitted bodice, the garment flared into a full short skirt and stopped mid-thigh. A matching red handbag swung from her shoulder on a long gold chain and red sandals covered her feet.

  “You look gorgeous,” Keir whispered, leaning close and planting a soft kiss next to her ear. His compliment sparked a gentle fire inside her.

  Warmed by Keir’s words, she answered, “Thank you.”

  Ryan turned her attention to the man next to her, examining him from head-to-toe. He looked magnificent. Dressed in black silk trousers with a matching leather jacket and hand crafted black leather loafers, a pale gray crew neck sweater peeked from the folds of the jacket. Keir oozed power and success. He represented the ultimate successful Hollywood director/producer.

  Leaning closer, Keir stroked a finger along her bare arm, drawing delicate circles on her soft skin. “Take my advice, go with the flow and everything will be fine. Remember, you’re with me. And I run this show.”

  Right. Ryan thought. It’s not your reputation going down the drain. It’s mine. She offered Keir a less than convincing smile. Laughing at her expression, he took her into his arms and held her close. The warmth of his body mixed with his unique scent soothed her riotous emotions. Rocking her to and fro, Keir nibbled on the side of her neck. “This is going to be fine. An hour from now you’ll be wondering why you felt so apprehensive.”

  Slowly Keir lowered his head. His lips brushed against hers as gentle as a whisper, creating delicious sensations. The warm, sweet kiss left her weak for more. Ryan returned his kiss, lingering, savoring every second.

  The elevator bell chimed and a soft computer generated voice announced, “Sunset Ballroom.”

  He lifted his head, whispering, “Well, Mrs. Mitchell, let’s show them who you are.”

  With a daring toss of her head, Ryan squared her shoulders, mustering all the courage at her disposal. “Absolutely, Mr. Southhall.” Displaying more confidence than she actually felt, Ryan turned to the door, linking her fingers with his. The choice had already been made. She could do this.

  The doors opened and they stepped off the elevator to music, people, and the appetizing aroma of food. Several curious gazes turned their way. With a hand at the small of her back, Keir guided her into the buzz of the ballroom.

  Awed, Ryan studied the beautiful room. Submerged in a mellow evening light, ceiling-to-floor windows offered a panoramic view of Sunset Boulevard, submerging it in a gentle evening light. A disc jockey manned his station near the dance floor, providing light, generic elevator music that wafted through the air. Black cushioned chairs surrounded tables decorated with gold metallic tablecloths and napkins. Couples milled around the room, parading their evening finery with plates of food and tall mixed drinks. Ryan spied a set of glass double doors leading onto an outdoor patio. Beyond the doors she noted multi-colored deck chairs where additional studio people sat.

  Gently tugging on her hand, Keir led her further into the room. She glued a friendly, confident smile on her face and preceded Keir, stopping here and there to chat with her co-workers as they made their way through the maze of tables. Although there were a few raised eyebrows and curious stares, Ryan didn’t encounter a
snide remark or any unpleasantness.

  Phil Bergen rose from the head table and waved a hand in the air. Nodding, Keir steered her in a different direction. He leaned close and whispered in her ear, “We’re supposed to be with the hot shots. Personally, I’d like to find a place where we can be alone.”

  For a beat she examined his handsome earnest face and then revealed what she felt in her heart, “So would I.”

  They strolled to the table where Phil sat beside his 20-something trophy wife.

  The happy greetings and friendly gestures boasted Ryan’s fragile confidence. Everyone seemed so friendly. It looked as if she’d worried herself into a frenzy for nothing. Keir was right. Nobody cared about her personal life.

  Facing Keir, she gave him a big “you were right” grin.

  Maybe she had overreacted. Or her ideas regarding the entertainment industry were greatly exaggerated. All her fears had been in vain. Hopefully, she could continue to work with these people without changing the status quo of her existence at the studio. Phil stuck out his hand. “Hey, my man. I thought you decided to skip your own party.”

  “Nah. I can’t have that.” Keir turned to Ryan. “I think you know some of these people. Let me introduce you to their better halves,” he joked, pointing a finger at different couples as he introduced the administrative team of One Leaf Studio and their spouses. Finally he turned to one additional member of the team. Her insides were twisted into a mass of clenched stomach muscles as she turned to her boss.

  Relief washed over the knots and untangled them. Glo sat smiling at Ryan and Keir. There wasn’t a hint of anger in her expression.

  Keir knew what he was talking about. Ryan had nothing to fear. Happy to have this drama finished, she took the seat he offered and settled down for an enjoyable evening.

  The guests at the table chatted pleasantly while drinks and dinner were distributed. Ryan enjoyed the sparkling wine and the excellently prepared Steak Diane.